---

07

 

Three days had passed ever since the last time I saw Taeyeon. She didn’t came to school, and she was nowhere in sight. I tried texting her but all of my messages got left unanswered so I gave up trying to text her after day one.

 

I tried asking the others of what might have happened to her but no one said anything about it. Hyoyeon was the only one that told me not to worry since she will be back soon. I have a feeling that they knew what happened but just wouldn’t say.

 

“Hello? Earth to Jessi.”

 

I blinked. “Huh?” In front of me was Tiffany. When did she even get here? I didn’t had any clue that she was already in the room. “Why are you here? Wait, who let you in?”

 

She threw her body onto my bed and it made me bounce on top of the mattress. “Hyoyeon did. I’m lucky that I came right when she was about to leave, if not, I might still be outside knocking on the door like an idiot.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You were in a daze when I came in. I literally had to call you a hundred times before you finally responded to me.”

 

I rolled my eyes and hit her shoulder. “You’re exaggerating.”

 

“You’re right, I am.” She smiled and lay her head onto my lap. I purposely moved my legs in an attempt to annoy her but she pinched me right away so I had to stop. “Why were you blanked out anyway?”

 

I kept quiet for a moment.

 

She lifted up her head to look at me with a worried stare. “You’re seriously blanking out too often. What’s wrong?”

 

I gestured for her to move her head away so that I could lay my back against the headboard. She got up soon after and sat next to me. “I was just thinking…”

 

“Of?”

 

“…Something.”

 

She stared at me. “You mean ‘someone’.” Her voice was so calm that it nearly scared me. Calm and Tiffany doesn’t go along. And when that does happen, it only meant that she was being dead serious.

 

“What?” My head spun around and I looked at her with a surprised look. “What are you saying?”

 

“You were thinking about someone. And that someone is none other than Taeyeon.”

 

I looked away at the mention of her name and unconsciously winced.

 

“I heard that you skipped class with her a few days ago. You didn’t even tell me anything about it—scratch that, you don’t even tell me anything nowadays.”

 

“What…” I frowned and turned to face her. She was obviously being angry now with how she kept on avoiding my eyes. “Have I been ignoring you?” I didn’t even notice that I did. I knew that we spent lesser time together now but what I hoped least is that I had ignored her and made her feel… left out.

 

“No. No, you haven’t. It’s just that…”

 

“Just that?” I encouraged her on. I wanted to know her thoughts and this was the time.

 

“You’ve been spending most of your time with Taeyeon now. And also, whenever I called you to go out, you would say that your assignments are piling up and you have no time. It’s like… like I don’t even see you anymore nowadays.” She paused. “God… I sound jealous, don’t I?”

 

I nodded, “You do. But it’s normal. And I’m sorry if we don’t get to spend much time together and that… I’ve been with Taeyeon most of the times because of projects and all…”

 

“It’s alright. I’m just overreacting.” She waved her hands around.

 

We remained silent for a while.

 

I had no idea what was on her mind but as for me, I was still feeling guilty for ignoring Tiffany these past few days—or weeks, I don’t know.

 

“Can you tell me the truth, Jess?”

 

I blinked at her, “What truth?”

 

“I think… No, wait. I know about… your feelings. I know that you like someone.”

 

“W—what?” My eyes widened. Unconsciously, I gulped. “Stop spouting nonsense,” I let out a nervous laugh and stood up. Walking towards the refrigerator, I then took out a bottle of water and started to gulp down the water. I didn’t know why I was nervous. It was not like Tiffany could possibly—

 

“You like Taeyeon.”

 

My throat suddenly became tight and I started to cough out the water. Frantically, I put the bottle down and wiped my lips with my sleeves. “What the heck did you just say? Do you have any idea what you just said? How can you just let those words slip out of your mouth just like that? Are you mad?”

 

She raised an eyebrow at my rant. “I think I know very well what I’m saying. And judging by your reaction, I would say that I hit bull’s eye.”

 

“I…I…” I tried to look for some excuses but couldn’t so I just laughed. “You’re being silly.”

 

“Mmm, you can say whatever you like, Jess. But you know that you can’t lie to me, I could see through your lies.” She said it so coolly.

 

I swallowed down whatever bile that was stuck in my throat. I like Taeyeon… I like her…

 

“Helloooo? You seriously need to stop doing this.”

 

“Huh? Do what?” I looked up to see her annoyed face.

 

She rolled her eyes and shook her head at me. “Blanking out, duh!”

 

“…Did I?” She blinked at me and then placed her palm onto my forehead. Frowning, I then backed away from her and slapped her hand away. “What the heck are you doing?”

 

Placing a finger onto her chin, she scanned my face. I felt like she was analysing me or something and for a moment, it gave me the shudders. I pushed her face away.

 

She huffed. “Are you like in denial or something?”

 

“What? I swear that you just keep on jumping from topic to topic that I don’t even know what you’re on about now.”

 

“I’m talking about Taeyeon. Your Taeyeon. The person you like.”

 

I felt the heat rising to my cheeks. As much as it was pleasant to hear those words, but it was still a little embarrassing, because technically, she wasn’t mine. “You don’t have to put it that way,” I cleared my throat.

 

“Aww, you lovesick fool. Are you feeling shy now?”

 

“Shut up.”

 

She laughed and rolled around on the bed. I stood in front of her with crossed arms. “You miss her?” She suddenly asked.

 

“What.”

 

“It’s been what, two? Three days? You haven’t seen her for days. Don’t you miss her?”

 

And again, my best friend managed to make my face heat up. Looking away from her, I hoped that she wouldn’t see my now reddened face.

 

“You do!” She laughed again.

 

I groaned and took a pillow from Hyoyeon’s bed before tossing it at her. “Shut up,” and then it was my turn to laugh when the pillow managed to hit her on the face.

 

 

---

 

When I got to finally see the missing figure sitting at her seat, it had already been five days ever since I last seen her. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t miss her presence.

 

I missed her laugh, her smile, her tease. Basically, I just missed having her here.

 

Pulling my bag strap, I breathed in and walked towards her. There wasn’t anyone here yet, and I was actually glad about it.

 

I pulled out my seat, and the screeching sound against the floor caused her to stir from her sleep and then look up at me.

 

A gasp left my lips when I looked at how haggard she looked. There were clear dark circles around her bloodshot eyes and her face showed nothing but fatigue. She looked so different compared to five days ago.

 

“Hey…” Her voice croaked.

 

Slowly, I managed to compose myself and sat down beside her. I turned to look at her and she was just blankly staring at the whiteboard at the front. “Are you alright?” I placed a hand onto her arm. I was genuinely worried. I mean, how could I not be? She left for five days without any words or clues and suddenly appeared in school looking so tired and fragile.

 

 “Hmm?” She turned to me. “Depends on what you mean,” she still managed to smile.

 

“You look terrible.”

 

“Oh, well, thanks for telling me that.” She yawned and then stretched.

 

“Where have you been?” I asked while taking things out of my bag. “You disappeared so suddenly and then there’s like no clue on where you were.”

 

“Were you worried about me?” She asked with a teasing smile.

 

I flipped open my book and answered, “Everyone was.”

 

“There’s nothing to be worried about because it’s nothing.”

 

“It’s not nothing if you disappear on us without any words or warning or whatever.”

 

She remained silent for a while. I had no idea what was running through her mind. At first, I thought that she was going to finally crack and tell me something but she still remained quiet. Even when the teacher walked into the room and started teaching, she still ignored me. She was looking at the front but I knew very well that she was not paying any attention to the ongoing lesson.

 

Her eyes were misty, and I wanted so much to know what was on her mind.

 

When the bell rang, she packed up and walked away without any words.

 

---

 

When Taeyeon left me at the classroom without saying anything or even bothering to explain, I couldn’t lie that I wasn’t peeved.

 

Although she didn’t say where she was heading to, but I had a good guess. So I walked down the dorm’s hallway and then knocked onto the door of Sooyoung’s room.

 

Nobody answered but I heard someone inside. I knew she was there. “I know you’re inside, Taeyeon. Open up.”

 

Some ruffling was heard from inside the room. “Open up, Taeyeon!” I knocked harder onto the door, hoping that it would annoy her or something. And it did the trick because the next thing my knuckles hit was air.

 

She was frowning at me as if she was upset. “What’s wrong?”

 

“What is wrong with you?” I pointed onto her chest. “You left again without any words said, do you even know how worried I—” My words got stuck when a man suddenly walked past Taeyeon and then out of the room but not without glancing at me with a scoff first.

 

“Where are you going? We’re not done talking here!” Taeyeon shouted at the man that continued on to walk. She went past me to run after the man and then grabbed his arm to stop him from walking any further.

 

The man gave an angry frown and swatted her hand away. “We are done talking.” He snarled and then turned away.

 

“Oppa, please…” Taeyeon sounded so desperate. I was watching the scene unfold in front of my eyes. I had never seen Taeyeon act so weak before and moreover, to someone that I don’t know. Was that her boyfriend or something?

 

The man’s footsteps slowed down as if he was hesitating, but then after a while, he placed his hands into his pockets and walked away.

 

I stood with my feet rooted onto the ground. I didn’t know what to do at that moment and do I even have the right to witness this happening?