He shook his head, slowly.

And that only confused me even more. Was he trying to tell me the answer? Or was there something else?

Why did he shake his head at me?

I wanted to ask, but I couldn't. So I continued to stare at him, hoping he would end the silence. But he only raised his eyebrows questioningly.

I shook my head and turned away towards the river. Only then the cold started to bit my feet again. But something inside urged me to not move and simply endured the numbing cold. So I listened to the unknown silent order, and kept my head down, trying to figure out if I made the right decision to remain here.

There was nothing that could be seen beyond the water surface, but at least the dark, unseen reflection helped to divert the odd, absurd confusion that was building up a nonsensical fortress inside of me. It was calming.

"It's beautiful isn't it?"

"Hmm?" My head raised up only halfway.

What was beautiful in this darkness where barely anything could be seen?

I wanted to ask, since he didn't resume to explain by himself. But what if he thought of me as stupid? A stupid, pathetic ahjumma.

"Possibilities. Of what could emerge from the dark. Isn't it beautiful?"

A shiver crawled across my skin. 

Why did he talk about things that could emerge from the dark? What could? Crocodiles? River monster? Ghost?

"What do you mean?" I tried my best to not sound scared.

"What I just said." He didn't continue to elaborate, making me more antsy.

Maybe I should just leave. Maybe he's just mentally sick.

"To wait everyday for something uncertain, like being in the dark, and the possibility of reaching the end of that wait, isn't it beautiful?"

"What are you trying to say?" I frowned, having better understanding of his words...probably even more than himself, but certainly not better acknowledgement of it.

"You know." He smiled again, and my eyes diverged away, preferring that, to being lured to be willingly glued on his face, and his inexplainable, abstruse smile again. The smile that was charming, but had began to annoy me with words that accompanied it.

"You're still young, of course everything look hopeful and possible for you. That there would be something to emerge from the dark. Try wait for ten, fifteen years more and you'll see." I regretted losing my cool, but it was a habit whenever I felt myself pushed to the cliff. I had to do something to stop them from making their way deeper into my easily accessible mind. It's my defense mechanism.

But something about him just felt different, that I immediately regretted the lashing out.

He chuckled softly. From the corner of my eyes, I knew he was shaking his head too. So I began to pull my feet up from the water, readying to leave.

"You're not leaving now, are you? You haven't answer me."

"Answer you what?"

"Does it matter?"

"No!" I angrily answered, forgetting the question.

"Then why are you leaving? Just stay with me here."

"Why should I? I don't even know you."

"You just said it doesn't matter." I glared at him, only to be returned with a sly