Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything.

 

Young Saeng and Hyun Joong appeared to be standing right behind but I was too busy hating how my breath had hitched and muscles stiffened. Heart thumped against the rib-cage in an almost aching manner, not used to the idea of seeing him after all this time. I sat rooted to the spot. His eyes holding my gaze.

It’s not that I didn’t know he’d show up today and that too here. Actually I was expecting this encounter from the very beginning of today’s trip. Expectation probably being the other factor eating away at my nerves and driving me to the brink. Yet when he had informed the others of his delay, I was relieved and aggravated all at the same time. I knew I’d have a hard time coping with his presence, yet out of all the days to be late today…

I gritted my teeth, gaze hardening.

 

"Kim Hyung Jun, after all this time, welcome." Lee Joon announced good-naturedly breaking the silence.

I broke the eye-contact thanking my loud mouthed friend’s voice that was distraction enough.

Hyung Jun scowled half-heartedly shifting his gaze to my friend.

“Nice to see you again too…and everyone…” he added addressing Nora and I. It was almost awkward.

Scratch that, it was awkward.

 

His tone of voice was lower, deeper, matured.

Jeans coupled up with a navy blue button up shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbows, that he hasn’t done before. Preferring a t-shirt or a loose tank top to wear, nothing even close to formal.

His physique buffed in comparison to the fair and lean 23 year old guy that I remembered. Usually teased for that very aspect.

Black strands that were once held down over his forehead, were now pushed back and up in a somewhat spiky manner and trimmed from the back of his head. The one thing that had remained unchanged were those round eyes and the sharp gaze that I could identify anywhere, anytime, no matter what. The one thing I had knew so well.

Three years really did fly by…

 

I only offered him a nod for a response before turning away. Funny how much things had changed.  

“You’re late: Nora reprimanded.

“I had some unforeseen things to attend to.”

My eyes widened for a spilt second. That was his excuse?!

He’s just discharged from army service and immediately has some unforeseen things to attend to? He didn’t show up in this place even once during his absence period.

 

“Something so important that you’re late for their anniversary out of all things?” I retorted curling my fingers into fists yet again.

“Look, it’s not like that I really had something to do - “

“Yea? Then why don’t you tell us all what that ‘something’ was? You’re discharged days ago and are already busy up your pants.”

“Kira – “

“Don’t you ‘Kira’ me!”

“Well at least I’m still trying to do something!”

I snorted. “Except for being there for your friends and family when they needed you the most.”

He visibly flinched as I continued. “Joined the special police force unit, congrats…”

Lee Joon tugged at my jacket’s sleeve when I proceeded to get up “Kira stop.”

Yanking my arm away I kept my eyes fixated on former ‘Maknae’ translating to ‘youngest’ of the group, until for the first time in three years I stood face to face with him again. At that moment, I realized that looking at Hyung Jun now, it wasn’t the same. Nothing was.

“Let me ask you then, if the special investigation case unit could not find anything, you really think you’re up for it?”

“Yes” His reply was low, almost too low as he looked me directly in the eye with an almost stone determined look. Yet I refused to buy it.

“Well good luck with it then, but prior to that, at least make sure to show some respect to this day; to them.” I spat.

“You don’t know anything…” He started jaw visibly clenching.

“Hyung Jun, Kira, enough.” Young Saeng’s voice rang distressingly.

“Ofcourse, how could I? Turned out I didn’t know you at all.” I spoke with a pang of my own. A bitter smile drew itself at my lips.

“Kira, listen – “

“Don’t…” Reflexively I stepped back, keeping my distance. “There’s no need.”

 He casted his eyes to the ground as I turned around silently making my way back to my seat on the jagged wooden log.

Lee Joon sighed disapprovingly when I sat back next to him. The others remained silent choosing not to comment on the exchange that just took place, and honestly I was grateful.

 

It wasn’t easy, the next hour that is. It was spent mostly in silence with some idle words and sentences. I found myself catching Hyung Jun’s eyes every once in a while and every time it sent my mind into an overdrive. The longer I watched him the faster warmth had rushed to my own eyes. I hated this.

The sun had almost disappeared behind the horizon before we decided to take our leave. It wasn’t safe to stay in the area during the late hours of the night, at least those were the restrictions put after the series of disappearances. It was almost laughable, these feeble attempts at keeping people out of the woods. If anything it had done the opposite, spiked up the curiosity of those adventurous enough and urban legends. Not surprising, after all no actual evidence has ever been provided.

Nora picked up the few of our belongings and all too suddenly disappeared from sight. Young Saeng and Lee Joon decided it was up to them to clear up the empty bottles and some litter left behind before too miraculously taking ages to do so.

I scowled, being left with the task of putting out the bonfire; with Hyun Joong, ‘The Leader’ that seemed to be zoning out for half of his life time and Hyung Jun. What a way to leave me alone with him, way to go people. Brilliant strategy.

Quickly I got to task without bothering to acknowledge the others presence.

 

“Kira, we need to talk.”

“We’ve got nothing to talk about, you’ve said everything the last time.”

I didn’t spare him a glance grabbing the bucket we’ve earlier filled with water for this very purpose.

“Kira please - ”

“Don’t, Hyung Jun! Just don’t!” I snapped slamming the bucket back down sending the liquid spilling over the rim onto the ground. My eyes stung.

“What happened in the past is in the past now. So just let it stay there, don’t bring it up.” My throat constricted.

It’s hard enough as it is.

 

The temperature around us seemed to have dropped even more. My fingers numbed.

“You’re the one who’s refusing to let it go.” His voice was low and steady.

I gritted my teeth. The nerve of him! I couldn’t figure out what pissed me off more, his calmness about the ordeal or the words that were leaving his mouth, which he still hasn’t learnt to control by the way.

“I let go a long time ago.” I countered turning my back to him.

“You’re a bad liar Kira”

I snorted. “And who are you to judge?”

“Someone who knows you inside out.”

My eyes widened before I balled my wrists and directed an icy glare at him. “Someone who knew, and that someone is no more”

He gritted his teeth. “What are you saying?! I’m right here!” Now that seemed to rile him up.

I almost chuckled, this was more like the Hyung Jun I knew so well; easily started but just as easily put off.

“You’re not.” I shook my head before looking up to face him. “To me, you’re gone Hyung Jun.”

I watch his dark orbs widen at my statement. He seemed to be thrown off track, body stiff, rigid, unmoving. Words trapped in his mouth. I saw a look of pain cross his features before walking away deciding to end it there. Familiar setting this was.

 

It hurts me too.

My steps were heavy with regret over the past, but I continually convinced myself that it had to be done, my pride too stubborn to give in.

“Just let me explain. Please.” He suddenly spoke up his voice low with a hint of desperation.

I pausing in my tracks. “What is it going to change Hyung Jun?”

Something seemed to break yet again inside of me. “You’ve made your choice and your point clear back then, so what more now?”

I could hear him approaching from behind. “I just want you to know.”

 “Why?!” I laughed humourlessly turning back around to look him straight in the eye.

“So that you could get your burdens off your chest? Or maybe because you feel sorry for me? Or could it be your conscious finally setting you up on a guilty trip?” I could feel heat rush through my system. Nails digging into the skin of my palms.

“Will you stop and just listen to me?!” His own voice had risen eyes taking on a harder edge.

“Why should I?! I don’t want to know anything anymore!” I growled determined to leave this time.

He moved quickly, curling his fingers around my forearm, pulling me back. “Stop lying to yourself!”

The ferocity with which he spoke and stared at me had my chest tightening painfully, it made it almost difficult to breath.

My features contorted into a similar look of rage once his words had settled.

“I’m Not!” My voice had betrayed me, raising in volume more so then I had intended. I attempted to shake him off.

He opened his mouth to retort when the fire that burned at our side hissed angrily.

“Steam it down, this is no time or place for this discussion.” Hyung Joong stated bluntly placing the now empty bucket back down with a disapproving scowl on his face. The message was clear, there was no room for argument. It was rare to see, let alone hear him like this.

 

Hyung Jun released me, stepping away. In the distance I noticed the others standing quietly by a large tree trunk, their expressions portraying witness to the dispute.

I ground my teeth as I stared ashamed, at the smoking remains of the pit of the once alive bonfire. Really it was ironic how much that simple image had described my very relationship with the man in front of me now mirroring my look.

Hyun Joong was right though, I had accused Hyung Jun of not showing respect to the time and place and here I was, getting carried away by emotions and heat of the moment myself.

I closed my eyes exhaling heavily in a silent apology. Waving to the two males, I quickly took off to where Lee Joon and Nora stood along with Young Saeng. The latter offered me a small reassuring smile to which I responded likewise and wished him good bye.

 

I stepped forward when Hyung Jun’s voice had reached my ears. “Kira…I’m sorry…”

It felt as though air was knocked right out of my lungs. I bit down on my bottom lip mercilessly as tears had rushed to my eyes with incredible speed.

Why did he have to do this?

I didn’t turn back, willing my legs to move, to carry me away.

 

I wanted nothing more than to crawl into a corner away from everyone. My vision swam as I strode alone fighting to keep my breathing steady. Even when both of my friends had caught up and walked almost in par with me, their steps were barely audible to my ears, being way too absorbed in my own thoughts and inner turmoil.

My will wavered. That was reason enough to absolutely loath that very splitting moment when I wondered if things could ever go back to the way they used to be. If we could go back to the way it used to be.

Clenching my teeth, I shoved yet another veil out of the way while simultaneously side stepping a large crater in the ground below. Everything was coming back way too fast and way too much.

I wasn’t ready to let it go and just pretend as if nothing had happened and throw a welcoming tea party. Not after the way he had left and the things he had said.

 

My pace quickened, crunching of the leaves under my feet growing louder. At the sight of my mini sports jeep I fumbled with my car keys before finally managing to unlock the damn vehicle.

Hopping inside I quickly buckled up starting up the engine as Nora and Lee Joon had only just seated themselves. Pushing the lever down, I rammed on the gas pedal forcefully, the engine roaring in protest as I sped off.

I drove for a set of about ten minutes along the empty and quickly darkening road in absolute silence.

An abrupt sharp turn to the left earned two surprised yelps as I pulled the car to a rough stop.

“What are you doing?! “ Nora questioned appalled by my brashness.

 

Bending forward, I pressed my forehead against the steering wheel that I clutched tightly under my fingers. Exhaling shakily I shut my eyes as a soft whimper escaped my lips.

“I’m sorry” My respond was a barely audible whisper.

“What’s the - ?“

“I don’t know what to do…” I continued softly.

Seeing Hyung Jun again. Just being next to him. Just being able to touch him. Just hoping for that young boy I once knew to be back.

“Why did he have to come back?” I questioned meekly my voice breaking into a series of quiet sobs. Heart constricting at my own words.

 

Why did I feel like this?

Even after all this time, why had he still managed to have such an effect on me? Why had I still allowed him to have a reign as strong as this on my feelings?

Why did I still feel anything at all for him?

 

“Lee Joon do something” Nora’s voice was thick with tension.

Be it any other situation I would’ve laughed at her lack of tact however now, it only served to intensify my surge of emotions bringing an overwhelming wave to my eyes.

Lee Joon carefully drew my shaking form away from the wheel wrapping his arms firmly around me.

Gripping the fabric of his shirt I sniffed, grounding my teeth, chocking back a sob.

“I’m sorry…I just.. can’t..I – “ 

“Cry.”

My eyes widened, breathe hitching.

 

“What?!” Nora gasped.

Slowly, I pulled back. A smudged visage met my tear stained eyes; brown brows knitted together, lips pulled back to form a thin line, features stoic yet reassuring.

“Cry.” He repeated his voice almost instructing and somehow gentle all the same. He peered down at me through soft understanding eyes.

Tightening his hold, he manoeuvred my head to rest against his warm chest. Familiar scent of the cologne that I gave him as a present filled my nostrils and the soothing beat of his heart reached my ears.

My lips quivered and vision blurred all over again as a sense of security enveloped me. Clasping the cotton fabric of his grey shirt between my fingers with a force that turned my knuckles white, a hot stream of tears ran down my heated skin staining it. 

I clung onto Lee Joon finally letting the dam of all the carefully contained and deeply buried feelings loose.

I allowed myself to cry again after a very long time.  

 

Not sure how long I’ve bawled my eyes out for, my violently shaking shoulders and cries now reduced to occasional hiccups and sniffs, breath slowly evening out. My body lay limply, twisted in an unnatural position though I didn’t dare move just yet.  Lee Joon comfortingly his palm over my back, the action warm and soothing.

From my position I could see Nora staring out of the window deep in thought. Expression grim.

Probably sensing eyes on her she turned and offered me a small smile. She was too in her own way silently consoling me. I returned her gesture with a weak smile of my own.

I felt so lucky and glad to have them.

 

Sighing softly I shifted, alerting Lee Joon my return to sanity as I spoke, voice hoarse. “I’m alright now.”

His lips twitched upwards in response “I know”.

Slowly he detached himself from me, motioning towards my side. “Common I’ll take the wheel from here.”

Nodding in silent confirmation I pushed the door open, slipping out to exchange seats. A sudden gush of cool wind hitting my heated skin had me missing Lee Joon’s warmth already.

Surroundings spun slightly once my feet had landed on the ground below and I resisted the urge to groan. Stilling myself, I took note of my heavy eyelids, stiff muscles and the growing headache that was already making itself known. Grumbling a string of curses under my breath I dragged my legs over to the passenger’s seat.

 

The rest of the drive was immersed in stillness.

The grey road ahead seemed never-ending. With light of the day declining fast, the skies took on an almost gloomy standpoint that I loved so much. Grey clouds blending with violets and patches of orange colours always set a sense of calmness within me, a flavour that’s bittersweet.

Weariness has meanwhile settled in, unravelling my tension. The sharp edges of my emotions dulling out and thoughts coming to a blank stop for the time being. I felt the alluring darkness that threatened to swallow me whole into a sweet and dreamless slumber. The car motions swaying ever so slightly akin to a lullaby and soft music that played in the background only adding to the drowsiness I’ve felt.

Slowly I obeyed, nothing holding me back as I slid my eye lids shut obstructing the beautiful view before me and giving in to the tantalizing darkness of tranquillity.

 

End of Chapter 2.

A/N: Annnd as usual please enjoy. Hope you like it! Reviews are welcome. Thanks xD