Tao smiles as he takes in Baekhyun’s presence in Baekhyun’s apartment. Tao rests on Baekhyun’s bed and God, it smells like Baekhyun. And Tao just wants to thank heaven for giving him this opportunity. But Tao wants to curse the hell when Baekhyun starts their conversation with the word Chanyeol, again.

 

“Baekhyun hyung~” Tao lazily coos when Baekhyun is done with another sentence about Park Chanyeol. Baekhyun then stops to listen to Tao and Tao’s heart just beats so fast because of Baekhyun’s innocence, or stupidity for the other people. “H-have you found Chanyeol?” Tao instead asks.

 

And he curses himself because he knows that this is wrong. He once asked JunMyeon if he can tell Baekhyun that Chanyeol is dead thinking that Baekhyun would know the truth now. But JunMyeon shakes his head no.

 

And Kyungsoo suggests, “Just pretend that Chanyeol is missing…” Kyungsoo says and Tao just nods because he doesn’t have something in his mind then. He doesn’t have a plan yet for Baekhyun’s hopes.

 

Baekhyun plays with his hair slowly now, and gently. Baekhyun sighs, “Not yet. But I know I will.” Is Baekhyun’s answer everytime the Tao asks him this. Baekhyun looks out the window and blinks, waiting for Chanyeol to come and it hurts Tao that Baekhyun doesn’t see him.

 

Tao, thinking that it is the start that they should make Baekhyun adjust to what the truth really is, tells to Baekhyun, “W-what if he left you?” Tao cautiously asks because he doesn’t want to say the wrong word or else, Baekhyun might get mad at him. And Tao will kill himself if he does that but he doesn’t know why he does that, “Chanyeol left you Baekhyun. He is gone… forever!” Tao doesn’t know what he’s saying.

 

Then Baekhyun looks at Tao, surprised. He chuckles a little like Tao just told a joke, he hits Tao’s forehead lightly, “What are you saying Tao?!! Chanyeol won’t do that? Even though he haven’t promise me anything, I know that he won’t do that.” Baekhyun really trusts Chanyeol.

 

Then Tao cannot believe what Baekhyun showed him. What the is this?!! So he sits up straight on Baekhyun’s bed and Baekhyun is a little confused at why Tao gets up. Tao feels like he’s ed and left a thousand of times because of Baekhyun’s stupidity.  Tao gulps, “Baekhyun hyung…” he holds Baekhyun’s hands and Baekhyun just looks at him innocently. Tao doesn’t want to see Baekhyun falling and falling down everytime he tells himself that Chanyeol won’t leave him. But Chanyeol did, Chanyeol left Baekhyun with nothing but pain and stupidity. And Tao doesn’t want to see Baekhyun like this.

 

Tao, seeing the face of the clueless Baekhyun, bites his lips to stop himself for saying the truth. He thinks of what will happen and the time ticks and tocks once again. Tao breathes as he travels through time and there he is with Baekhyun. Baekhyun, once again, is crying and Tao is shouting at him. Tao blinks because Baekhyun breaks down and there he is, shouting like he’s so mad. He walks a little closer but he can’t hear anything. Tao is about to speak when the time immediately pulls him back the time and here he sees Baekhyun waving his hands in front of him.

 

Tao shakes his head and suddenly feels dizzy. Baekhyun asks Tao what the problem is and Tao just shakes his head nothing. Tao pouts because every time he attempts to tell Baekhyun the truth, he just can’t.

 

Tao then thinks of the possibilities when he tells Baekhyun the truth, and it is either, Baekhyun will be more depressed, Baekhyun will get angry at him and Tao doesn’t want that, or Baekhyun will accept it and Tao hopes that it will be the result. But first, he must tell to JunMyeon about it first.

 

“What is it Tao?” Baekhyun says and Tao’s heart skips a beat when he sees Baekhyun waiting for him. He softens as he says, “I love you…”  and Baekhyun’s eyes circle in shock. And when it sinks in him, Baekhyun’s eyes tell Tao the answer. Tao looks down the ground and expects this rejection. “Whatever… but I love you.” he tells for the last time and sets off of Baekhyun’s apartment.

 

Tao feels stupid for confessing like that suddenly. Aish… why did I do that.. It would be awkward, really… He says as he thinks of what just happened earlier. Tao blinks and feels his body hot because of his sudden confession, and rejection. He shakes his head because he’s so stupid and he always doesn’t know what to do.

 

Tao walks and thinks of the things that happened to him these months. And particularly, he realizes something that concerns Kris. Without his knowledge before, and now that he realizes… he killed Kris.

 

He stops and blinks at nowhere. Tao huffs heavily as he feels his heart breaks. Tao gulps and tries to recall what happened that time. Kris is in his arms and he realized that Kris didn’t have someone with him because Kris seemed to have a bad condition that day since he tired Kris.

 

He unconsciously moves the time to the future… “It’s 16^th of July…” “Kris is dead.” He moves the time when Kris was going to die. He stayed for an hour there and lived in the future.

 

Tao shakes his head and ruffles his hair, “I killed someone…” Tao looks at his hands like he just stabs Kris on his heart and brain. Tao’s eyes water and he wants to scream. “I’m sorry Kris. I’m so sorry…” he closes his eyes and cries on his knees. “I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m sorry…” he repeatedly tells.

 

Here he is, sitting on the front of the board, crying. He cries harder and just wants to kill himself for being careless. “I’m sorry.”

 

A minute or two passes by and he gets himself up. He looks up and accidentally reads the writing on the board, “Chanyeol, I will wait for you forever.” and Tao just sobs harder. He ruffles his hair and cries harder. Why am I not enough.

 

He notices the people are looking at him but he doesn’t care. This is the first time he cries in front of many people just like Baekhyun. Let him be.

 

Then JunMyeon walks out the store and circles his eyes when he sees Tao crying. “Tao!!” JunMyeon shouts as he lifts Tao’s chin up. He looks at Tao who is broken helplessly. Tao continues to sob and shows JunMyeon his tears. JunMyeon is broken when he sees Tao like this. This is the first time he sees Tao so he doesn’t know what to do. JunMyeon looks around and reads the writings on the board, “Chanyeol, I will forever wait for you.” JunMyeon then understands.

 

He feels the same way so he just wraps his arms around Tao and whispers, “I’m here. Don’t cry.” repeatedly to tell Tao that he’s not alone. Tao relaxes in JunMyeon’s arms and hugs JunMyeon back because he knows that JunMyeon can understand him.

 

Tao gets his self up and JunMyeon offers Tao to take him to a café. Tao nods childishly and JunMyeon drags him to a café where JunMyeon orders everything that can make Tao smile.

 

“What happened Tao? I was really shocked.” JunMyeon tries to be calm as he is so that Tao can explain clearly. Tao is looking at his coffee and can feel that his eyes ing hurt.

 

Tao blinks and tells JunMyeon the truth, “I can see past and futures JunMyeon hyung…” he tells and JunMyeon just blinks, not yet sinking in his head what Tao is saying. “Chanyeol died because he loves Baekhyun so much…”  Tao says when he recalls what’s inside of Baekhyun, not the eyes, not the mind, but the heart in Baekhyun.

 

JunMyeon gulps because they made this decision that they won’t tell Tao how Chanyeol died. Tao looks at JunMyeon, “You told Kyungsoo and JongDae hyung to not tell me the truth…” Tao says as he sees it through JunMyeon.

 

JunMyeon makes an attempt how Tao knows this but Tao cuts him off, “Don’t worry, they didn’t tell me anything. As I tell you JunMyeon hyung… I can see past and future… but also everything through one’s inside.” Tao confesses and JunMyeon doesn’t know what to say because he wonders that Is this even true?!! I can’tbelieve this can happen!!

 

Then Tao looks at JunMyeon and tells, “I barge in Baekhyun’s past and change his present hyung…” And Tao realizes it… “Baekhyun is supposed to be dead now hyung.” Tao says and JunMyeon falls silent and blinks at what Tao is saying.

 

He cries more when he realizes that he shouldn’t do that… and he realizes that the reason why he is pale these days… “I am not allowed to save someone in the future and past hyung. It pulls out a life from me.”

 

JunMyeon gulps as Tao explains further, “I saw in front of me that he was hit by a car but accidentally, I moved the time when Baekhyun bumped me. And me, knowing what will happen, pulled him towards me so he won’t be hit by a car anymore.” JunMyeon’s heart beats faster when he realizes what Tao said, he’s not supposed to save a life from the past or future but he did… for Baekhyun…

 

JunMyeon is listening and Tao explains everything, “YIXing and I were grabbing lunch when we met him. And when we were eating, there I realized that I saw him and should look after him. So I intentionally moved the time backwards to where we met him. I stopped him to grab lunch with us. He said no and went back in walking but I insisted and stopped him from walking. He kept on saying no so we just watched him until an accident happened in front of him… He was supposed to be in that car accident, he was supposed to be bumped and squeezed by the cars but only a debris of one of the cars hit him on his arms.” Tao realizes it and feels stupid. “I changed many lives.” Tao is guilty.

 

“I shouldn’t live in the future because it slowly shortens my life hyung… as time passes by, the time is cutting the life out of me too. Just like how lived in this future… which is now your present.” And Tao breaks down, he’s not yet ready to die but he is close to dying. And he dies everyday…

 

JunMyeon takes Tao’s hands to explain him what happened. “K-kris’ son… I accidentally moved the time to future when he was going to die. I’ve stayed in the future for an hour so I cannot go back anymore. I want to go back but… I cannot.” Tao cries so hard that JunMyeon has shed tears too. “Tao…” JunMyeon mumbles.

 

“I barge in Baekhyun’s future and the only thing I see is that he is crying all the time… I tried to see Baekhyun’s smile in the future but I didn’t see one. This just means that… Baekhyun may not smile anymore.” Tao tells JunMyeon and JunMyeon is caught. Baekhyun should smile. Baekhyun deserves to be happy and smile. But then, when Tao says this, “It’s because of me. He’s supposed to be with Chanyeol now.” Tao sobs and cries like a child.

 

“I changed Baekhyun’s future, if only I didn’t move the time… probably, Baekhyun is with Chanyeol now. But no… I took Baekhyun’s happiness away. I always blame the world for it takes everyone’s happiness away, but Me!! I am the one who took his happiness away! !!” Tao ruffles his hair and JunMyeon doesn’t know what to do but to feel bad too now that he’s knowing the truth behind what’s happening.

 

“And because of that… this may be the last time hyung…” Tao gulps as he realizes that he has his limit too. He can’t wait forever. Tao deserves to be happy too like somebody else. “I don’t want to ruin his life anymore… This will be the same forever if we won’t tell him the truth.” Tao challenges their selves. JunMyeon blinks at Tao like he doesn’t know what to do. But for Tao, “Tell him the truth.” Is the thing they can do for them to change Baekhyun’s future.

 

“But he’ll be hurt…” JunMyeon can now speak but Tao just opposes, “He’ll suffer more if we prolong this stupidity.” Tao is serious and this is the first time he sees Tao is like this, like he knows everything he does, no hesitation.

 

JunMyeon blinks at what Tao is saying but sees that Tao is right in anyway. And besides, they will tell the truth to Baekhyun no matter what. “Don’t say that it’s too early for that. It’s almost a year, he’s been stupid for almost a year.” Tao says and JunMyeon doesn’t know if he will get scared that Tao is like this. JunMyeon just nods and then Kyungsoo comes barging in and dripping in sweat.

 

His eyes are in shock and Tao can see this, and unexpectedly, he sees it through Kyungsoo so he immediately sets off of the store and then gets the board where Baekhyun wrote these stupid words.

 

He runs to where Baekhyun is and finds Baekhyun standing in the edge the side of the bridge. “Don’t you dare Byun Baekhyun!!” and by that, Tao’s eyes glimmer in tears. Baekhyun looks around and when he sees Tao, his eyes glare in anger, “Chanyeol is dead!!!” finally, Baekhyun realizes. Tao stops and smiles for Baekhyun won’t suffer anymore. And flashes of Baekhyun’s smiles goes in his mind. Baekhyun is sitting on the green grass too and is laughing and singing loudly.

 

But it is cut when Baekhyun shouts again, “So I have to die too.” Baekhyun jumps off the bridge and the people screams. Tao shouts and is about to pull Baekhyun up but he’s too late. “!” this may be the last time hyung…

 

He forces the time to go backward and the time eventually takes him where Tao wants to go. Baekhyun has jumped off the bridge down the water and the people screams, but Tao is there to stop him. Tao catches him by his shirt and curses. “What are you doing Byun Baekhyun?!!” Tao then pulls Baekhyun up and when he sets Baekhyun on the ground.

 

He hits Baekhyun hardly with the board where Baekhyun’s writing is there. The people are shocked and as well as Baekhyun. “You’ve realized it… then don’t ing do this! We’re still here…” Tao sobs and rubs his eyes like a child and Baekhyun hurts too when he sees Tao crying for him.

 

“I’m still here. I always show you that, but you never notice. You will never notice.” Tao says. And holds Baekhyun on his shoulders and wakes Baekhyun up, “I love you Baekhyun. But you will never love me because you love Park Chanyeol. But he’s dead Baekhyun.”

 

Baekhyun sobs more and Tao knows that it is because of Chanyeol, it’s always Chanyeol… and not Tao.

 

“He’s dead, a long time ago. But we’re here. Just like when you’re there when JongIn died for Kyungsoo.” Tao says. And Baekhyun sees it, Tao lets Baekhyun sees it. Baekhyun sees how he comforted Kyungsoo; how he made Kyungsoo smile. “We can do these for you too. Just let us do that for you please…” Tao whispers.

 

And Baekhyun looks at Tao. He cries even more accepting Chanyeol is dead, all of the times Chanyeol’s been there for him… he just can’t, he shakes his head, “No Tao.” He sobs, “I’m sorry.” Baekhyun shakes his head repeatedly and mumbles those words.

 

Tao is hurt to see this and doesn’t want Baekhyun to suffer. He holds Baekhyun’s shoulders and he’s being brought by the time to where he sees Kris’ death goes before his eyes and he sees Kris smiling. “You won’t suffer anymore, son.” And one last tear is seen from the father’s eye. And Tao realizes that he killed Kris so he won’t suffer anymore. He moved the time where Kris was going to die because he didn’t want him to suffer anymore. Tao smiles.

 

And the wind travels to where Baekhyun is smiling, sitting on the green grass. Baekhyun’s smile, Finally, I see it. Tao smiles but he’s still hurt. And then as his gaze moves around the place, he sees Luhan choking to death, and he remembers… He sees Luhan laughing wholeheartedly that his mouth is opening wider and wider. And then someone, Tao can now see who, Baekhyun throws at piece of paper in his mouth and Luhan chokes to death. Luhan struggles to breathe. And then he sees who’s beside Baekhyun, it is Sehun who is laughing with the Kyungsoo… He smiles at the scene and he breathes as he closes his eyes in grasp for air.

 

And there beside Luhan, YiXing is playing the guitar on his hands. And he can see a Kyungsoo’s heart-shaped smile, an angelic one owns by his JunMyeon hyung, and a genuine one Tao is longing to see. He sees Kyungsoo and JunMyeon singing together with YiXing, Luhan, and Baekhyun. But there is one voice that he recognizes the most… it is Jongdae’s voice. And Sehun is there, enjoying the music he hears. Tao smiles at the people in his life are finally smiling.

 

And he smiles more when he sees the one beside JongDae… it’s his hyung’s grave. MinSeok is part of the group of people swarming under the tree. He smiles because he haven’t seen those smiles before, and he knows that his brother is smiling too now that the important people in Tao’s lives are smiling. Tao wipes the tear off of his face and smiles.

 

But his eyes widen in shock and horror when he sees the grave beside his brother’s grave. He doesn’t notice that tears come out from his eyes when he reads his name on the grave. Tao’s heart breaks…

 

They are smiling but… he is dead. Tao covers his mouth and cries more. He cries loudly because he cannot take this anymore but the future is not yet done to him. Baekhyun says, “I miss Tao.”

 

And Tao is back into the present. And he realizes that JunMyeon, Kyungsoo, and JongDae have arrived. Baekhyun is looking at him, wondering why Tao suddenly stops. And Tao scans his eyes around and finds YiXing going to where JunMyeon is. And Tao can read in YiXing’s lips that he’s asking JunMyeon what is going on.

 

Tao looks at YiXing and it catches everyone’s attention. YiXing then looks at Tao, Tao smiles wholeheartedly, “I live for the time…” he says and YiXing recognizes this because Tao lets him see the past…

 

YiXing asks, “Do you know the reason why you are living? Do you know what will be the reason you will be dying?” YiXing laughs with a dimple on his cheeks. He hits Tao on the shoulder and sits with him. Tao laughs with YiXing and moves aside to let YiXing sit beside him. “You startled me.” Tao smiles at YiXing.

 

YiXing relaxes, “I see you Tao, always looking at nowhere. Then you always ask us What is the reason why we are living and the reason why we’ll be dying… then I think it’s time for you to answer those question yourself.” YiXing says without looking at Tao.

 

Tao looks at YiXing and smiles, “I live for the time…” Tao tells YiXing and YiXing is bound in confusion. YiXing pouts because he cannot understand Tao. He shakes his head because YiXing won’t understand anyway. YiXing lets it go because he knows that Tao is weird so he asks instead, “Then what you’ll be dying for?” Tao pouts and looks at the sky to think about it. And when he finds it, Tao smiles brightly and then it is suddenly cuts to that.

 

YiXing blinks at what he just saw. He can see that past… Then YiXing sees Tao clutching his chest. “Tao!” JunMyeon goes to Tao and tells to stop that. Then Tao looks at YiXing, “I will die for you guys…” he says and they are taken aback.

 

JunMyeon is tearing apart now and can sense what Tao is going to do, so he tries to stop Tao. Tao stands up straight and looks at Baekhyun and tells, “I will risk my life for you… just like what Chanyeol did…” Tao says but smiles afterwards and shakes his head, “No… I will risk my life for you guys…”

 

Tao smiles and it hurts them all. He looks at the others who are bound in sadness and confusion, “I die everyday waiting for you…” Tao tells them and continues, “… to smile.” And Tao closes his eyes and forces the time to move forward to where everyone is smiling. He doesn’t mind JunMyeon’s curses about risking his life for them and moving the ing time backward and forward.

 

And he looks back and sees his body falling down the ground, with everyone taking him to the hospital afterwards. But there’s nothing they can do. Because Tao is in his destination now.

 

Tao just stands there while he sees everyone’s smiles. He can see Luhan’s sparkling eyes while smiling, and Sehun’s cheekbones which are so high as he smiles too. He sees Kyungsoo’s heart-shaped smile with JunMyeon’s angelic one. He smiles as he sees the cute dimpled smile of YiXing, and adorable curly-cornered lips of his JongDae hyung. And this… Baekhyun’s genuine smile which he’s longing for so long.

 

He just stands there while crying. But he’s smiling and satisfied inside because he can now see his MinSeok hyung waiting for him.

 

= = =

 

That spring…

 

Luhan smiles and hands Sehun the books of Sehun he bought before. Sehun looks at him and Luhan tells him, “Sign it Mister, I was longing for you to sign this you know.” Luhan rolls his eyes and Sehun smiles and gets a pen and signatures every book Luhan has.

 

 

Then Luhan rides in with Sehun as they decide to go to the store to visit their friends. And when they arrive, they see Baekhyun looking at the blueprint of the renovation of the store they built. Luhan nudges Baekhyun on his side.

 

Baekhyun looks at Luhan and smiles as Luhan offers him a drink. He takes it and breathes for a second. And he goes back to his work again.

 

Sehun puts an arm on Kyungsoo’s and JunMyeon’s shoulders when the two are busy talking to YiXing about the bookshelves they need for the new store. Kyungsoo, YiXing, and JunMyeon look at Sehun and smile.

 

Then JongDae has arrived and everyone tosses their things away and gets in the van, leaving their work to the other workers in the store. JongDae is driving to MinSeok’s and Tao’s cemetery.

 

They are walking to Tao’s and MinSeok’s grave when Kyungsoo sees a familiar figure standing near a tree. Baekhyun looks at where Kyungsoo is looking at and circles his eyes when he sees the tall man.

 

“Kris!!” JunMyeon calls and Kris turns around to see his schoolmates in middle school. Kris waves to them and Kyungsoo leads the group to where Kris is standing.

 

Kyungsoo touches Kris’ shoulder as he looks at the grave of Kris’ son. “Why are you here?” Kris asks and smiles as they gather around his son’s grave.

 

“We’re visiting Tao.” YiXing says and invites Kris to join them. Kris nods and Kyungsoo sees that Kris needs some time to be with his son so he gestures the others to walk to Tao’s and MinSeok’s grave. “We’ll just be waiting for you there Kris.” Kyungsoo says and rubs Kris’ back. Kris nods and waits for Kyungsoo to disappear in his sight.

 

Kris smiles sweetly at his son, “You won’t suffer anymore son. I hope you are happy.” and one last tear has dropped down Kris’ eye. Kris smiles and breathes deeply as he sets his son’s gift to him on the ground.

 

Kris now runs to where the group is and there they are, sitting on the green grass and decide to have a picnic with the two. YiXing plays the guitar and sings. Everyone sings and it becomes music to everyone. Their voices fill the air and everything is perfect but when they hear that YiXing is out of tune, they all laugh. YiXing buries his face on his palms and mumbles, “I think I should be practicing my voice too for the job I got.”

 

“You should.” Baekhyun nods and tells YiXing prankly. And Luhan laughs wholeheartedly that his mouth is going wider and wider. Then Baekhyun cuts a piece of paper on the notebook he is holding and shots it in Luhan’s mouth. “3 points!!”

 

Luhan chokes to death and everyone laughs. Baekhyun scans through the place and feels something. He suddenly mumbles, “I miss Tao.”

 

They all soften and smile. “Well here he is.” JunMyeon says and points to Tao’s grave.

 

“And he never leaves, because he’s in our heart and mind. They are just gone in our eyes but not in our hearts…” Kyungsoo says and they all agree.

 

“Thank you Tao…”

 

“For making us smile…”

 

= = =

 

I know what I am living for

And I know what I’m dying for

 

I cannot wait for forever

But to see your smiles, I can feel forever

 

= = = = =

 

Waaah!! So guys!! How did you find the story? I hope you understand it even though it’s not formatted clearly.

 

Wah, I want to know your feelings about this, guys, please comment! Thank you! I’ll appreciate it.

 

And sorry if you’re thinking that I’m a murderer of EXO, because I’ve killed a lot of EXO members here in this fic. Well, in Dream of Me, I only killed Jongin there, and not YET Xiumin. But here, I killed Xiumin, Tao, Kris (the son), Jongin, and Chanyeol!! Huwaaah!! I’m sorry. and I’m supposed to kill Baekhyun here right? haha. But I did not. I kennot.

 

So enough for this!! And thank you so much for subscribing and upvoting this fiction. Mwah! I’m really grateful. Thank you!

 

And sorry if you find errors in this fic. I’ll try to fix them someday. Thank you for waiting!!