“Markson FOREVER! Jackson and Mark! Brothers for life!”

“Mark would you stay still for one minute,” His mother exclaimed whilst trying to pull Mark’s head through the hole in his jumper.

The four year old groaned and squirmed out of the grip of his mother, landing on the floor. His father looked over his paper and rolled his eyes as Mark began to cry.

“Oh come here my baby-“ His mother cooed, picking up Mark to fix his head of hair.

He snuggled into his chest where he felt most safe and closed his eyes, hoping that the rumours floating around his house of him attending ‘school’ would be proved false and that this was all just a bad dream.

He frowned, as he was set into his car seat, banging his legs against the car, “But why doesn’t Grace have to go!” he exclaimed, his arms flying up into the air.

“Grace goes to big girl’s school! You know that Mark”

He nodded and clutched onto his buzz light-year toy; it was the only one that his mother had allowed him to bring to his first day of school because frankly she didn’t want the hassle of trying to wrestle it from the grasp of a screaming child.

He waddled into the classroom full of screaming children and tried to ignore the fact that his stubby legs were shaking with fear for what lay beyond him. His mother’s hand was soon replaced by his teacher’s hand and he desperately jerked around to see his mother leave. That’s when the tears came.

“But my mom-“ Cried out Mark with his fingers stretched out towards the door and his chest heaving up and down at a rapid rate. No one could calm the crying boy down, no one apart from Jackson Wang.

Jackson was excited to finally start school, it meant escaping the small apartment he shared with his father and occasionally his mother too. School meant that he could go and make friends, maybe even be normal. When he walked through the doors of his classroom, he had a smug look on his face and rolled up his sleeves.

“I’m ready to play!” He exclaimed before running off to the sandpit with some other kids.

He noticed the boy with soft brown hair crying and asked a girl beside him what was the deal with him.

“He’s been crying since his got here, what a loser” She laughed out loud.

Jackson nodded and turned around to stare at the boy clutching his buzz light-year toy in the corner. He could make him smile, he thought in his head and so he marched over with a huge grin on his face but as he approached, Mark’s head jerked around to stare up at him, his huge brown eyes all puffy and red, the under of his cheeks grazed with scarlet and his bottom lip, jutting out for the whole world to see. Jackson just stared until the boy stopped crying.

“What do you have there?” He said softly, sitting down beside Mark and taking his toy; bad mistake.

Mark’s bottom lip began to quiver and he let out an almighty cry, his hands desperately grabbing at the toy in Jackson’s hand.

Jackson went bright red and immediately threw the toy back, pressing his finger up against Mark’s big lips to get him to stop smiling. It worked and Mark immediately went silent, tears streaming down his face.

The two spent the rest of the day like this until Jackson decided to go get a Woody toy to play with Mark’s Buzz light-year toy. He put on a funny accent and waddled the toy over towards Mark, poking him on his thigh, which gained a light laugh from the formerly crying boy.

An hour later, it was a completely different story. The two boys were playing as if they had been friends for years, Mark even giving Jackson the Buzz toy to play with. The two played a game where they had to infiltrate a spy ring; a group of girls playing with building blocks. As Mark approached from the right, Jackson took the left and the two knocked down the girls’ building. They both laughed and ran to the other side of the room to avoid a scolding from the teacher.

The clock struck three and the children were told to line up in a row by the wall and hold their lunchboxes. One by one, they were told to leave the room and go meet their parents outside. Jackson saw Mark leave the room and the latter turned around and gave a sheepish wave and smile before running on out with his Buzz light-year toy. Jackson smiled and the girl beside him poked him.

“Are you a cry-baby too?” She cooed, pinching him.

Jackson frowned and shook his head, “I just made sure the baby didn’t cry! Thank God his mom came and picked him up!”

That was a lie, Jackson really liked the new kid Mark Tuan and he was so excited to see him the next day and the day after that and the day after that and the day after that too. Jackson knew that they would be friends forever and despite having only played together for a short while, Mark Tuan had made the best impression on Jackson Wang.

To both Jackson and Mark, if you asked either of them how long they had been friends they would both swear it had been a lifetime however in reality it was just less than four years.

Since their awkward meeting when they first started school, they had latched onto each other and everyday Mark would come home with a new story to tell his mother about Jackson, ‘his amazing best friend forever’.

On Jackson’s absent days, which were becoming increasingly more common, Mark would try to mix with the other kids but it would never work. He would always end up sitting in his and Jackson’s usual spot by the big oak tree in the corner of the playground, usually reading a book or something.

“Hey four eyes! What are you reading there?”

It was also on these days when Mark had no protection from the school bullies whom plagued him when the tough and sturdy Jackson wasn’t there. He tried to just look down and continue reading his books but soon the bullying turned violent with hitting, kicking and sometimes even punching in the stomach.

“Little baby lost his boyfriend eh?” Jaehyun cooed before punching him in the stomach.

Man could that eight-year-old swing a punch, Mark thought before keeling over.

“Gay boy! Gay boy! Gay boy!” Jonghyun cackled out before taking Mark’s book and flinging it across the playground.

As tears welled up in Mark’s face, a teacher noticed the disturbance and came over to check on everything.

“Is everything okay boys?” Mr Lee said, stuffing his large hands into his pockets.

“Of course! Just chilling with our best friend Mark!” Jaehyun smiled, pinching Mark’s arm in the process.

“Play well now!”

“If you tell anyone Mark, we’ll make sure you don’t make it home to your precious mommy”

The boys left Mark but the insults and name-calling didn’t.

Mark hid the bruises easily under a sweater despite the hot weather and continued to attend school, each day getting a little lonelier due to the disappearance of Jackson.

“Hey best friend” Jaehyun cooed, one afternoon.

“Go away” Mark said in his best ‘big boy’ voice

“Aw Markie- don’t be like that” His older brother Jonghyun said from behind him, grabbing him by the collar.

“Let’s pull his pants down!”

Mark tried to squirm and shook his head, hoping somehow Jackson would come and save the day. When Jackson didn’t turn up, he thought of the next best thing and focused his attention on his best friend, how he would always have the best ideas, how he always knew what to do and how he always knew how to make Mark smile.

“There you go little baby-“

The bullies began to laugh as Mark tried to move his wrists and ankles to no avail. They had tied him up to a tree and pulled his pants down, revealing his buzz-light year underwear.

“Poor gay baby!” They laughed before leaving a poor defenceless Mark to cry to himself. He wailed- and wailed- and wailed until finally a teacher came and found him.

The young Ms. Choi scooped the small child up in her arms and ran straight to the Principal in complete shock and horror that a group of eight-year-olds could do such a thing.

Mark was silent. He was silent when they called his mother and he was silent on the car-ride home too. He was silent at dinner and he was even silent when he went to bed that night.

He was silent when Jackson greeted him in the morning with a grin.

Wait- Jackson?

Mark turned around to see a grinning Jackson standing there, nudging him at the door to their classroom.

“Happy to see me bud?” He said before ruffling Mark’s hair.

Mark wrapped his arms around him and began to cry, not knowing if and when he could stop.

“Mark- Mark hey Mark-“ Jackson said, pushing him back lightly to look at his tears, “What’s wrong Mark?”

Mark shook his head, too ashamed to tell the truth to his best friend.

The day went on as usual with Jackson paying a little more attention to Mark and how he behaved throughout the day. He noted some small differences, for example whenever Mark would enter a room he would look down nervously, or when Mark knew the answer he wouldn’t put up his hand and he would instead sit there quietly. This wasn’t the Mark that Jackson knew, the Mark that Jackson knew was bubbly and talkative; a bit of a know-it-all to be honest but Jackson didn’t mind because he was his best friend.

“Hey Mark” Jaehyun called from across the changing rooms, “Gay boys aren’t allowed to get changed with real boys”

Jackson stiffened at the words coming from Ahn Jaehyun’s mouth, a boy he had not liked since day one.

Jackson turned to Mark to see him shake a little and then turned around to Jaehyun who was smirking back at the two. He clenched his fist.

“What did you call him Jaehyun?” He asked plainly.

“I said he was a big fat g-“

Before Jaehyun could even finish his sentence, Jackson had pounced on him and began to punch the living daylights out of his face and his stomach. The boy screamed out but Jackson kept on punching and punching until his knuckles were bloody. A teacher came in and grabbed the furious eight-year-old; carrying him out of the room and into an office.

Mark couldn’t move and as the two boys were removed from the locker room, everyone turned to stare at Mark, wondering what kind of hold he had over his best friend Jackson who was now known as, ‘The Crazy One’.

“Mark Tuan- detention now”

“But miss-“

“Detention.”

As Mark walked towards the big detention room down the dark hallway, he clutched onto his lunchbox and tried to make the shaking in his fingers stop. As he neared the door he saw Jaehyun leave the room and head straight towards him. Mark flinched and moved to the side to watch Jaehyun simply ignore him. Mark furrowed his brows nervously and knocked on the door, walking in a second later to see Jackson Wang sitting at the very back leaning on a chair.

“No talking you two. I expect to see you two here every day for the next two weeks” The disinterested teacher at the front said from her gossip magazine.

As Mark neared Jackson at the back of the room, he couldn’t help but smile and when he finally sat down and got his books out, Jackson reached over and squeezed his hand.

A rush of electricity went through Mark and he opened his hand to see that Jackson had passed him over a piece of gum. He smiled to himself and turned to Jackson, mouthing the words, “Thank You”

Jackson winked and turned back to his work, thankful he could get to spend an extra hour alone with his best friend Mark Tuan for the next two weeks after school.

“He dumped me Jackson,” Mark choked out on an unusually cold August evening.

“Meet me at the spot- I’ll be there in ten minutes” Jackson replied.

This was the second time in less than a month that Mark’s boyfriend Junho had broken up with him and Mark was no less upset than when he had been broken up with the first time. In fact, he was still sobbing when he arrived at his and Jackson’s meeting place.

Their meeting place was beside a huge Oak tree in the park beside the high school they were both to attend in September and when Mark arrived he immediately threw himself onto the ground and held his head in his hands.

His world was spinning and his heart was aching; he wanted to believe this was just a nightmare and it would all be over in the morning.

Jackson swore and muttered under his breath as he began the walk to their meeting place, bumping past a frail looking boy on the stairs as he practically ran to Mark.

Jackson recalled back to the first time that bastard Junho had broken Mark’s heart and he can remember meeting Mark in the same location to hold his hand and pick up the pieces. He had remembered how broken Mark had been and he had wished this would never happen again but soon Jackson realised, he wouldn’t always be there to pick up the pieces for Mark and he couldn’t protect him forever.

When Jackson arrived, Mark poked his head up and with red puffy eyes he choked out a sob before Jackson’s arms were placed firmly around his small shoulders.

“You’ll always be my boy Mark, you know that okay?” Jackson muttered into Mark’s ear, trying to soothe and comfort him.

The two boys stayed like that for quite a while and every second of every minute they were together; Jackson thought long and hard about confession his true feelings towards his best friend Mark.

To Jackson, Mark was everything. Mark was his best friend, Mark was his ‘bro’ and Mark was even the wallpaper on his phone.

Jackson was in love with Mark and despite how courageously Mark had come out to Jackson a few years ago, Jackson just couldn’t muster the same courage to tell Mark how he felt. He didn’t want to ruin how perfect their relationship was but at the same time, he heart ached and he wanted nothing more than to press his lips against Mark’s.

“I’m sorry Jackson,” Mark choked out from a dry throat, his voice shaky and unsure.

Jackson’s heart broke and he tightened his grip around Mark.

“Don’t ever say sorry to me again Mark”.

Jackson walked Mark the whole way back to his flashy home in Northern Seoul and straight into the arms of his worried mother. She gave Jackson a smile of gratitude and offered him a ride home. He declined and set about the lonely journey home to his shabby apartment he shared with his crook of a father.

“Where have you been you little bastard?” His father roared as soon as Jackson opened the front door of the apartment, alcohol steaming out of his pores and breath.

Before Jackson could answer his once again drunk father, he was slapped in the face before being pushed down onto the ground. Helpless, he lay there and took it until blood clouded his vision.

The beatings had been going on for years, ever since he could remember he had been his father’s personal punching bag; he even had to take time off school due to the injuries obtained from it.

His father was a drug dealer and in general, a terrible man who spent all of his money on women and cheap booze. He would often come stumbling into Jackson’s room in the middle of the night, threatening to kill him. He wouldn’t go through with it and although sometimes Jackson wishes he did just kill him, at the same time he feels even more of a need to survive to look after Mark Tuan.

It was a few days later when the boys began high school and Jackson was especially excited because it would be the first time seeing his best friend since Jackson had left him off home to his mother.

As he walked into the unfamiliar hallway in his new school, Mark’s laughter was heard floating down the corridor like water flowing down a river; it was sleek, airy and frankly, full of happiness.

Jackson, however, stopped in his tracks when he saw Junho’s hand draped around Mark’s shoulders. He clenched his fist and just stared until Mark saw him.

“Jackson! Over here!”

Jackson ignored him.

Mark had no idea why Jackson was ignoring him nor was he even sure if Jackson was ignoring him. He knew Jackson would be waiting by their usual spot that afternoon and so he bid farewell to Junho and went to meet Jackson, who was of course sitting by their tree.

Jackson glanced up as soon as Mark arrived and immediately looked back down, playing with a few twigs on the forest floor.

“Did I do something?” Mark asked

Jackson looked up, pain and grief in his eyes and shook his head, “No,” He answered solemnly.

“Well then why-“

Jackson stood up and pressed his lips against Mark’s, pushing him against his tree and trying to force his tongue into his mouth. Mark squirmed and pushed him off.

“Jackson! What the hell was that for?” He yelled out.

“He doesn’t love you- not how I do” Jackson said before looking down awkwardly.

“Jackson…what’s up?” Mark asked, holding out his hands.

Jackson turned to him with tears welling in his eyes, “He doesn’t love you how I love you! I would never hurt you like that! I would never leave you on your own! I picked up your pieces Mark and I did it because I love you!” He sobbed, his voice breaking.

Now Mark understood. He understood Jackson’s grief and anger.

“Jackson please-“

“NO- Leave me alone” Jackson choked out- pushing Mark against the tree, causing him to slip and fall.

“Jackson! Wait-“ Mark called out, scampering to his feet.

“When I’m around, bad things happen to you”

Mark thought back to when he was tormented by bullies simply because Jackson /wasn’t/ there to stop them. He felt powerless.

“Jackson- please no-“ Mark called out once more, tears falling from his eyes.

He fell to the ground and he was on his own.

He walked home in the rain and his mother was surprised when Jackson wasn’t there to leave him off as he had done twice before. His mother was even more surprised when Mark didn’t mention Jackson and by the time he started school, she figured it be too awkward to mention Jackson and so it went unspoken that Mark Tuan was no longer friends with Jackson Wang, and that is what killed Mark the most, that he couldn’t even speak of what had happened. He had let his best friend down and was unbeknown to the pain he was causing Jackson on a daily basis. That night, he nearly choked on his own tears.

Mark sighed and sat on the bed, still holding the ‘Forever Markson’ photo in his hands. He understood why Jackson had become a bully; he used it as a way to combat the pain in his life and the pain that Mark had caused him.

“MARK! DINNER!” His mother called.

Mark set down the photo on the bed but didn’t make it two steps without curling up into a ball and crying.