So, I finally managed to update! :)

And I know you guys will have questions to why this update is like this....but I do hope you understan somehow....

Down with a fever... but since my bestfriend wrote 11,200 words, I should at least finish 10,000 total. With SS and this and MFY (not yet done) I have more than 7,000 words. So I hope I get to finish MFY's update as well. 

I'M SICK SO I DIDN'T RE-READ THIS; PARDON MY ERRORS.

Anyway, have fun! :)

CHAPTER FOUR

“Jessica!” Lee Dong Wook called from the kitchen. Since they got married, Lee Dong Wook and Jessica agreed to ‘play house,’ having him over the weekends and then he would be back in Stanford for his law classes during the week. Her parents already got him an apartment there, and Jessica told him to not complain about her parents’ generosity. This came with the price of their marriage anyway. She bribed him with her connections, and having his family’s financial troubles wiped away by the influence and money her family could offer. Despite being a ‘Lee’ now, Jessica didn’t legally change her name, and this was perfectly fine with her father - he actually favored his baby girl to retain his last name forever, feeling as though she would be his child for the rest of her life.

Since they would be far from each other anyway, it would be easy for them to fool people into thinking they really were in love, which was in favor to what Jessica wanted. Honestly, the only person she needed to convince was Tiffany, but she also couldn’t let her family lose their face because she wasn’t normal. So having to hide that, with her husband’s help, nobody would talk about her or Tiffany. Nobody would dare, and that was all she wanted.  

“Oi! Let’s go to the grocery,” he yelled for her again.

Jessica walked out of her room and headed to her kitchen. “What? Why?” she asked him as she scowled her brows at him, confused to what she lacked in her kitchen since there had always been someone who delivered her groceries twice a week. “Can’t we just call and have it delivered? I’m really busy right now, and plus, it’s really cold outside,” Jessica said as she was still reading her materials for her first day back from winter break tomorrow. She liked being ahead of her course so she would understand what her professors would say.

He sighed as he shook her head, closing his eyes. Sometimes, Jessica found him overdramatic whenever he wanted to convince her with something. “I want to cook some meat, and you don’t have it. So, let’s go,” he said as he walked toward her and then grabbing her shoulders, turning her the other way and pushing her towards her room. “Go get your shoes since you already look decent enough to go out.”

“Why can’t we just order take out?” Jessica whined. Really, why couldn’t they just call and have something delivered? Because going out seemed so time consuming and she would love to bury herself with more work. Truth to be told, she was studying ahead of her course to keep her mind occupied; if she thought of her ex-girlfriend for one more day, she was sure her heart and mind wouldn’t be able to take it. But she shouldn’t really be thinking about this now since she already let her go the moment she decided to have this marriage to save Tiffany from herself.

“Take out won’t be good!”

She swore she hated living with someone else. Actually, if Dong Wook was a little less outgoing and hyper, Jessica wouldn’t mind having him around for the next two or three years. But he liked things she didn’t and that usually gave Jessica a headache. There was a time she was dragged to hike in Utah, which she swore she almost filed for divorce had it not been for Tiffany. But her husband had a point; if she was going to think about Tiffany and stay inside her room, she would just end up depressed. With this thought, Jessica was thankful she had her friend with her. Who would’ve thought that they would end up friends and married if this was based on the first time they met? Who would’ve thought that they would get along so much that they could be best friends? Even though they were so different, they got along, well, just like cousins. It seemed like despite everything, there was this sibling-love between them. One day, she would have to explain to her husband’s new girlfriend that she wasn’t the other woman, and wouldn’t that be a funny scenario, Jessica thought.

Without a reply from his wife, Dong Wook said,“No take outs. I really want some Korean Barbecue. Come on!” He was shaking her back and forth, as though this was going to help. For someone wanting to be a lawyer, he wasn’t really good at convincing her. “Please? Please? Please? I’m leaving tonight, so you have to comply!”

Maybe Jessica was wrong. He was good because she was to a point of just giving up and letting him get his way. “Can we just go to a restaurant? I don’t want my place smelling like barbecue. The smell sticks.” She sighed. She loved the food, but she couldn’t stand the stench it left on her clothes whenever she went to restaurants, yet alone having her whole unit smell like that. Just no.

“Well, we can do that. But in one condition.”

Jessica looked over her shoulder and asked him, “What?” glaring at him, trying her best to intimidate him enough to not having an extreme condition.

“We’re using my car,” he said.

“Sure. Hell, I prefer for you to drive. I don’t even wanna go out.” Jessica laughed, she then hurried to put her shoes on so they could be done as soon as possible. She then grabbed her coat that was on her bed. “Hurry up!” she yelled for him since he was in his room, changing. Sometimes, he took longer in deciding what to wear, and Jessica would sometimes just throw together outfits for him so he wouldn’t waste her time, waiting for him. “Oi! You freakin metro! Hurry up!”

“Yeah, I’m done.” He walked out of his room while still buttoning up his shirt. “Which restaurant do you want to go to?”

“Whichever. You’re the one that’s hungry,” Jessica said as she rolled her eyes.

******

“I swear, you’re eating too much,” she said to him after he ordered more meat. She was already done, but he kept on putting more food on her plate, which she had to eat. “Anyway, I’ll go to the restroom.”

“Poop? Good! Make room,” he said as he nodded.

Jessica looked at him in disgust, still playful. “You’re an idiot. How can you eat with things like that in your mind?” Especially they were out in public. What kind of manners did he have anyway? Jessica couldn’t believe his tactlessness sometimes, but that was what made him himself, so it wasn’t like Jessica was going to complain about that now. She knew it the moment they met as she recalled how he was rude to her and her friends; he even said bad things, indirectly, about his now father-in-law. Funny. But Jessica wondered if that mouth of his could one day cause him trouble.

“What? It’s a natural thing.”

“I’m going to go pee, you retard.” She left without waiting for his reply. Sometimes, they were too close that even in public, they would blurt out things that would cross the borderline of appropriateness. Just the other day, they were eating at a restaurant and he suddenly asked her how do two girls make love to each other, which she replied with he should just watch to know. But, as usual, he was persistent so she yelled out something that she shouldn’t have, causing the lady who sat across them to give them the stink-eye, which made Jessica turn red in embarrassment, but they both laughed out loud. It wasn’t like they knew the lady so they didn’t care. It was probably the first and only time they would see her. It was a funny story now, but it sure was embarrassing at that moment.

After finishing her business, she then washed her hands only to see Tiffany also standing just two sinks away from her. Playing it cool, she tried her best to quickly get out of there so she rinsed her hands and reached for paper towels.

But unfortunately, Tiffany’s eyes met hers. Her ex’s were wide and her face turned pale as though she saw a ghost. And maybe, Jessica was the ghost of her past. That was why she didn’t want to be seen anymore. Later, Jessica knew she would only be crying herself to sleep and she was done with that - at least she thought she was. “Je---Jessi…”

Jessica used to correct Tiffany whenever she called her that, but after awhile, she picked up the new nickname. With this call confirmed that this wasn’t a reaction to her overly active mind, but the reality that there her ex was, standing in front of her. “Tiffany…” she called to get her attention but Tiffany didn’t respond. Her eyes were now on Jessica’s hand, looking at the obvious new accessories that were on her left ring finger.  “Tiffany,” she called once again. Even though what she did was also for Tiffany, she didn’t like seeing this pained expression on Tiffany’s face. “Tiffany,” she called again and finally the girl looked her in the eyes. No. Jessica shouldn’t be pulled in. At this point, she just wanted to hug Tiffany and tell her that everything was a lie; she was still deeply in love with the girl. She wanted to be on her knees and beg for Tiffany to take her back; however, she knew she couldn’t do that. Everything she had done was always for Tiffany’s best interest. If she gave in on her feelings, Jessica knew everything she had done was in vain. So she had to look at her ex-girlfriend, the love of her life, and plaster a fake smile on her face, pretending that she was happy and content with her life. “Nice to see you.”

“Yeah.”

“I have to go, actually. Dong Wook’s waiting for me,” she said whilst pointing at the door.

“Oh,” Tiffany said but paused and then continued, “you went together?” She now wore a smile on her face, equally, if not, better than Jessica’s. But having been with Tiffany for a very long time, she knew that the girl was simply wearing a facade. It wasn’t like she could ask her to genuinely smile at her, but still. Jessica hated it.

“Yeah.” She couldn’t be there any longer, especially with just the two of them there. She might really tell Tiffany the truth to wipe that look off her ex’s face. But she knew better than that. She had to have self control. The last time they talked, it didn’t end up great. Recalling that time, days after her wedding, Tiffany came to her house in Korea and was hysterical. She was basically telling Jessica to divorce Dong Wook. The blonde remembered telling her, “It’s too late, Tiffany.” But her ex-girlfriend was persistent for her to get a divorce because they could be together, even if she would be disowned by her own family. If that was the case, Jessica wouldn’t be in this scenario from the very beginning. She was in this marriage to not let Tiffany throw away everything she had lived for: her family, her inheritance and trust fund, and her future. But Tiffany grew up with everything being handed to her so she couldn’t really think of why things turned out the way it did. If love was the only basis for them to be in an everlasting relationship, then the god of love may had given them their entire blessing; however, there was the reality that clouded over them: they were both daughters of prestigious families with a long history in Korea and the economic support that held their nation. Having this kind of love would only soil those names; Jessica was responsible enough to not hurt both of their families, but her thoughts were also to hurt Tiffany now rather than be in an even more agonizing pain later. Rather than be blamed for everything later.

“I see. Well,” Tiffany started but paused as she sighed. The silence frightened Jessica. Because Tiffany may say the right thing and she might file for a divorce tomorrow. But that was ridiculous! She knew she needed to keep herself together and not let her ex-girlfriend know how much love was still in there; how much love she was trying to kill. “Uhm,” Tiffany said, catching Jessica’s attention once again. She bit her lip for a moment and then said, “Congratulations.”

Congratulations? Really? Honestly, Jessica didn’t know how to feel. There was this pool of emotions that seemed to have gathered in her gut, turning her insides to something she couldn’t understand. All she knew was there was a sudden rush of chills that went from head to toe, as though ice-cold water was poured on her.

“That’s all,” Tiffany said.

Knowing she had to still seem like the girl that was in love with her husband, she had a soft smile on her face - she hoped it was plausible for a smile - and bowed her head. Without saying anything, she walked out of the bathroom, hoping that none of the tears that were threatening to fall betrayed her.

Dong Wook saw his wife approach. From the guy who was happily stuffing his mouth with food, he then frowned as he saw the look on her face. “Jessica? What’s wrong?”

Jessica’s head hung low, trying to avoid his eyes. “Let’s leave. I’ll wait in the car,” she murmured. “Unlock it.”

“Wai---” He reached for her hand but soon let go. “I’ll go pay.”

******

“Jessica, you can’t be crying again,” Dong Wook said as he was seated on Jessica’s bed, trying to console her. “Really, if seeing her already does this to you, why don’t you just change schools?” He sighed as he brushed her hair with his fingers. “You’re bound to see her, you know?”

Jessica didn’t say anything and it wasn’t like she could say anything because what he said was true. She moved her head, wiping her tears with her pillow and she then sniffed as well.

“I can’t leave you like this, but I have a class tomorrow.”

“Go,” she managed to say. At least she should also be nice to him because he was to her. They were friends, and she hoped she was doing at least that. “I’ll be fine tomorrow.”

Jessica felt the weight on her bed lift as he got up. He fixed Jessica’s blanket and then said, “I’m sorry for asking you to go out for Korean,” and he left the room.

Even Jessica knew it wasn’t Dong Wook’s fault and he didn’t have to apologize, but she didn’t have the energy nor the motivation to tell him that. She would probably have to do that tomorrow before he went to class. She felt bad that she couldn’t see him off with a smile on her face, they were having such a good day too but it had to be ruined. However, Dong Wook understood. Because from the very beginning, he knew about Tiffany; he knew why she married him; and he knew that Jessica was broken. Despite all that, he was there for her. Sometimes, Jessica felt bad that he rarely went out with his dates. But she knew Dong Wook was seeing someone that was in Stanford, who was German, and she was glad he could find someone, and she was truly ready to explain the situation to whoever he would have a serious relationship with.

Jessica’s thoughts were cut when her phone vibrated, since it was beside her, she could see that it was from Tiffany.

Sender:

Tiffany Hwang <3:

I guess I should start calling you Jessica. Sorry that I might’ve made you uncomfortable earlier. But I really didn’t mean to make you feel that way. So, I’m sorry. Have a happy marriage.

After reading this, there was a huge lump that built in . It was as though TIffany was saying goodbye, and this time, it was for good. Jessica knew what she did hurt Tiffany, but she had her best interest in mind when she did this, but she still couldn’t stop herself from feeling the pain, right? Because even though she was now married, she knew that her feelings were just for Tiffany, and her alone.

Jessica didn’t need an apology. She needed Tiffany to understand; without explaining what she did, Tiffany needed to understand why she threw away three years of being together, but it wasn’t easy, and Jessica knew that. With the absence of words, there was no way for her ex to figure out such noble thing she did.

Sender:

Tiffany Hwang <3:

I know that we didn’t end in the best possible note, but know that I wish you nothing but the best in life.

No! Jessica didn’t want this from Tiffany. It really seemed goodbye.

Sender:

Tiffany Hwang <3:

Somehow, even though I somewhat know what you’re doing, I still can’t do anything to stop you now. Remember, I always said you’re too nice at fault? That you shouldn’t always think about me? But I guess you’re going to be you, and I won’t be able to stop being myself either. This message may be one sided, but please do let me get things out so I can have a proper closure.