Track no.: 05

Main character : Xiumin and Yeseul

Cameo : Sehun and Tao

“Minseok oppa~” Yeseul greeted when she saw him at the convenience store. All he did was flashed a smile to her and went back his choice of milk; banana or almond.

“Hyung, get the almond one,” Sehun ordered. But Xiumin wasn’t really listening and he kept his eyes on the bottles. Then, Yeseul took both, handing the banana flavoured to Xiumin and the almond flavoured to Sehun.

“It’s on me,” she grinned.

“See hyung. Your girlfriend is better than you,” Sehun joked and Xiumin laughed nervously.

“I can buy both for him, you know,” Xiumin told Yeseul after Sehun had went to the chips section.

“But you’re taking too much time making a decision,” Yeseul said as she took a can of coffee. Xiumin just nodded in agree.

“Stop drinking so much coffee. You’ll damage your kidney,” Xiumin grabbed the can of coffee and replaced it with a yoghurt drink instead.

“That’s just nonsense, oppa. Plus, I’m only drinking coffee to keep me awake to study,” Yeseul had laughed and Xiumin listened, loving the sound of her beautiful laughter. If there was something he could keep in a jar and stare at forever, it would be a laughing Yeseul.

“Hyung, come on!” Sehun called him out and he just left, without even saying anything to Yeseul.

“Well, goodbye oppa,” Yeseul murmured. She’s in love with the man to accept that sometimes; he forgets to leave with a nice note of ‘goodbye’ or ‘see you later’.

* * *

It was a few weeks before Christmas and Xiumin had promised to bring Yeseul out to go for an early shopping for presents. And maybe new clothes for herself once she move. Yeseul waited, and waited, and waited for Xiumin but he never came. She even tried to call him but nothing. She had left 10 missed calls and more text messages. She’s not mad or anything.

“Pick up your phone oppa…I’m worried sick here,” Yeseul muttered when Xiumin didn’t answer her call again. Her gut tells her that Xiumin is fine but her heart was in distressed. Three long hours of worrying and waiting, Yeseul decided to trust her gut and go shopping alone.

“I wonder if oppa likes white or cream…” Yeseul picked out two different sweaters and contemplated on which one to buy for Xiumin. White or cream? Maybe green for a change?

Suddenly, she heard familiar voices coming towards her and she turned around. It was Xiumin, with another person.

“Tao, stop whining. The shirt doesn’t look nice on you. Try something else on,” Xiumin scolded his friend for making a fuss out of a small matter. Tao had wanted a shirt for Christmas, of weird graphics and expensive. Xiumin didn’t like it so he didn’t buy it for him.

Yeseul was confused. Why was his boyfriend going shopping with his friend when clearly Xiumin had promised to go out with her? She waited until Tao had entered the dressing room before approaching Xiumin.

“Oppa,” Yeseul called out.

“Oh, Yeseul-ah.”

“Why didn’t you answer your calls? Did you forget you’re supposed to go out with me?” Yeseul was angry now. Her instincts were right about Xiumin being fine but she didn’t expect to meet Xiumin like this.

“Your friend is more important than your promise with me?”

“Didn’t I tell you…Oh gosh! I’m really sorry, Yeseul-ah. I thought I told you. Tao’s going to leave for China soon so I wanted to go buy him something. I’m really sorry. I didn’t forget my promise really,” Xiumin held her hands, begging her to forgive him.

“Fine,” Yeseul could only sigh. So nothing was following Yeseul’s original plan of wanting to shop for presents, because she had followed Xiumin and Tao on their little time of ‘shirt hunting’. She wanted Xiumin to be with her alone but since Tao was leaving soon anyway, a little sacrifice wouldn’t hurt.

* * *

It’s the time of the year for winter and snow should fall any day now. Yeseul had wished for snow on Christmas and the love of her life, Kim Minseok. Nothing much, she would say. Since both were likely to be granted without her even wishing, so she thought.

“Remember to come for dinner with my family on Christmas night, okay?” Yeseul reminded Xiumin on their date.

“I might be late. I might not make it to,” Xiumin was being honest. He didn’t want to disappoint Yeseul at the very last minute and make her angry. At least, if he tells her earlier, she would know and not get worried.

“Why?” Yeseul whined. She’s doubtful about her wish at the moment.

“The boys had planned a small Christmas gathering to say goodbye to Tao. I have to go since I am the hyung,” Xiumin explained.

“But you’re not the only hyung they have, oppa. Please come to the dinner,” Yeseul did aegyo to make Xiumin change his mind.

“Yeseu-ah, don’t be like this. You know I can’t say no to the boys,” Xiumin looked the other way to avoid Yeseul’s aegyo.

“Am I less important than your friends?” Yeseul pouted.

“Of course no but this is an important matter. Tao’s not going to come back until Chuseok so a goodbye party should be necessary.”

“But Christmas is only once a year so a dinner with my family is important too. Minseok oppa, please~” Yeseul persuaded more. She wants Xiumin to come for dinner. She wants to spend Chirstmas with him. She wants to be with him the day she tells him something very significant.

“I’ll try my best, okay,” Xiumin had given up in the end. He caressed Yeseul’s cheek before kissing her forehead. Simply feeling fuzzy and his love for her made him do it.

* * *

Christmas dinner has started but Xiumin didn’t even call. Yeseul had told her parents that her boyfriend would come but it wasn’t confirmed. She didn’t want her mother to feel burdened so she didn’t ask her to cook extra.

“Minseok oppa doesn’t eat much anyway so cooking extra would mean extra work,” Yeseul told her mother.

Dinner went on with talks about the coming New Year and preparations for Yeseul’s studies. Dinner ended with Yeseul volunteering to wash the dishes alone while her family chatted in the living room. Christmas night will end in a few more hours and Xiumin was still not around.

“I guess I am less important than his friends,” Yeseul thought. She decided to have some fresh air because she didn’t feel like joining her family. She was too down to engaged in such lively chats.

Now, she’s just outside, nothing much in mind except for the fascination of the vapour escaping from due to the cold weather. No snow, no Minseok.

“Christmas wishes are dumb,” she kicked a pebble and it hit the foot of a stranger. She looked up and she quickly recognised him. So much for a stranger.

“I’m sorry, Yeseul-ah. They won’t let me leave until all the presents are opened. They just had to give him a lot of presents,” Xiumin explained his late coming.

“It’s okay,” too disheartened to be happy with his presence by now.

“Merry Christmas, Yeseul-ah,” Xiumin held her face, a kiss was in his mind. But she pulled back.

“What’s wrong?”

“Minseok-oppa,” Yeseul’s voice was meek. Xiumin frowned.

“Hhmm?” Xiumin responded to show her she has his ears.

“Let’s break up,” Yeseul said the three dreadful words.

“What? What do you mean?” Xiumin panicked. He didn’t expect Yeseul to break up with him, on Christmas.

“Break up. Does it mean anything else?” Yeseul rolled her eyes. She doesn’t like this situation but she got herself into it.

“But why? Is it because I missed the dinner? I’m really sorry. REALLY!” Minseok widened his eyes, a way to emphasize how apologetic he was.

“No. The dinner was just…Oppa, I just feel that I’m not your priority. I know you have your own life but how things are, it’s like we’re not dating at all. All you think about is your friends. And I’m not only talking about Tao. Remember the time when we’re supposed to go skating together?”

‘Yeah?”

“You were two hours late because of Sehun’s dance recital, but you didn’t even know. You didn’t even apologise. And if you say you had to go to the recital, you didn’t have to go. It was only rehearsal!” Yeseul was literally screaming because the memory just made her angry.

“But-“

“And tonight, I’d really hope you’d come. Even if you’re late for dinner, at least you were at the table. But no. You only came now. I wanted to tell you during dinner, so that it would be something to celebrate but I don’t want to celebrate anymore. Oppa, I’m moving to USA to study,” Yeseul looked away. She didn’t want to see Xiumin’s expression. Happy? Shocked? Blank? Whatever, she doesn’t care anymore.

“What? You’re really leaving? For your studies? Why didn’t you tell me?” Xiumin bombared her with questions, though they’re quite rhetoric.

“I told you, oppa. I told you I got accepted into Stanford. And you just nodded to it. I remembered it clearly,” Yeseul was sadder than ever.

“Oh. Did I?” Xiumin realised he was the one who was wrong all this time. He had not been treating his girlfriend right and he deserved all of this. He deserved a slap from reality.

“Thank you, if you ever actually loved me,” Yeseul choked on her words. Goodbye; just something so hard to say.

“Good night oppa. Go back, it’s really cold. And…Merry Christmas,” Yeseul said before turning around to go back in. As she was walking, she felt something wet on her cheeks but she’s not crying. Was it rain? She looked up and snow started to fall. The first snow. Too late. She already took back all of her wishes. This was probably someone else’s wish.

“Yeseul-ah. It’s the first snow,” Xiumin shouted as he was still standing at the same place as before. But Yeseul didn’t turn back. She kept walking and went back into her house. Locked herself in her bedroom and cried, sinking down to the floor. Hoping that the pain would go away.

“I’m sorry, Yeseul-ah.”

* * *

“Look, hyung! It’s snowing outside. It’s finally snowing,” Sehun cheered excitedly as he pulled Xiumin outside.

“Snow!” Sehun screamed as he twirled around like a little girl on the streets. Xiumin just looked at his silly friend, too happy about snow.

The first snow. As white, fluffy frozen water dropped down from the sky, Xiumin was reminded by everything that had happened on the day of the first snow last year; last Christmas. His lost love which he took for granted. There were a lot of things he regretted not doing and he wished he could turn back time.

There were other people on the streets, mostly couples that are walking together happily under the snowfall. He would be one of those people if only he had love Yeseul enough to not be ignorant. He kept his gaze at the random being passing by.

Xiumin wondered if he meets Yeseul right this moment, would he fall to his knees and ask for forgiveness? Cry his eyes out because she’s back? It’s not Christmas yet but snow had come early this year round. Perhaps not ‘Merry Christmas’ but ‘Hi, how are you?’ would be uttered with several exchanges of stories about life. Xiumin heaved a sigh when he realised nothing he thought of would come true. Because she’s never coming back to him.

“Hyung! Why are you crying?” Sehun asked when he saw Xiumin’s damped cheeks.

“Huh? Oh, it’s just melted snow,” Xiumin sniffled through the lies. He was in fact, crying. The first snow will forever remind him of the regrets he had that very Christmas.