Track no. : 04

Main character : D.O and Gaeun

Cameo : Kai

“Hyung, your girlfriend’s on the phone,” Kai passed his phone to Kyungsoo who was warming up his voice.

“Hello Gaeunnie~” Kyungsoo greeted over the phone ever so happily.

“Oppa…do well on stage today,” something was off about her voice. As if she had just cried.

“What’s wrong? Are you crying? Are you sick? Did someone hurt you?” Kyungsoo was getting worried. It’s been weeks since they last met and he doesn’t really know what’s going on with Gaeun’s life.

“I just have a cold. My nose is painful,” Gaeun lied. She didn’t want to burden her love by telling him the truth. He has to perform well and not lament over her problems.

“Oh. Then, rest well. Take your medicine okay. I don’t want my baby getting sick. Because when I kiss you, I might get the germs,” Kyungsoo’s voice was full of concern and he really meant what he said. Gaeun lightly chuckled at his words. Kai was listening to their phone conversation and pretended to puke because Kyungsoo was getting all mushy and stuff. Kyungsoo playfully chocked him with his free hand.

“I will oppa. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine,” fine was far from her actual state. Kyungsoo heard her sniffles but since Gaeun said she’ll be fine, he put his faith on her words. Soon, they hung up and Kyungsoo was getting ready to go on stage.

The moment their call ended, Gaeun broke down and fell to the ground. Crying until she has no more tears. She knew that announcing their relationship to the public would mean sacrificing her privacy too. She knew she would face problems because of his diehard fans. She knew she would get hurt at some point. And that was exactly what happened.

When Gaeun was on her way back home from school, some girls suddenly came rushing to her and started hitting her with whatever they had in hand. Phone, bag, books, anything.

“You ! You stole D.O oppa from me.”

“Stop dating him. I will kill you!”

“You sick girl. Get away from my precious Kyungsoo!”

“You’re ugly! What does oppa see in you?!”

Spiteful words pierced her heart as she was physically abused by this relationship. She didn’t mean to enraged people. She just wanted to love and to be loved.

* * *

“Hyung. Hyung, wake up. Hyung!” Kai had to push Kyungsoo out of the bed to wake him up. Kyungsoo groaned in pain as he rubbed his sore back.

“Are you okay?” Kai had asked after he saw Kyungsoo sat up on the floor. He shook his head in reply.

“I had a dream that Gaeun was attacked. No, a nightmare. She was crying and when I went to hug her, she went away and then…” Kyungsoo stopped his sentence midway and shot a look to Kai.

“And then what?”

“You woke me up!” Kyungsoo hissed.

“Hyung, you were shouting like a maniac. I had to wake you up,” Kai explained. Kyungsoo didn’t pay attention to him and quickly took his phone from the shelf next to him.

“Who are you calling now?” Kai asked.

“Gaeun.”

“Hyung, it’s 4am. She needs sleep. She has school tomorrow,” Kai was being nosy and acted as if he knows everything about Gaeun’s school life.

“Tomorrow’s a Sunday, you moron,” not so much a know-it-all. Kai was slightly embarrassed and decided to stop worrying about Kyungsoo’s problems and more about his sleep problems, so he lied back and closed his eyes.

“She’s not answering. Kai, she’s not answering. She’s not answering!” Kyungsoo was panicking and on the brink of smashing something into the wall. His fist to be exact.

“Hyung, shut up! I’m trying to- Hyung? Hyung? Where are you going?” Kyungsoo was putting on his pants and a thick jacket.

“Something happened to Gaeun. I can feel it. I’m going to see her,” and with that, Kyungsoo had left the dorm after leaving a very flabbergasted Kai and the other members who were still in dreamland; of course, not aware of the racket in their room earlier on.

* * *

Kyungsoo had the shocked of his life when he reached Gaeun’s place. The walls were splattered with red paint, chrysanthymum flowers were laid at the entrance, it smelled like rotten eggs and someone was cowering at the gate.

“Gaeun? Gaeunie?” Kyungsoo walked towards the cowering figure. She looked up with red, teary eyes.

“What happened? Why is your place like this? No, no, no. Gaeun, stop crying,” Kyungsoo held her face and wipe her tears with his warm hands. But that couldn’t stop them from flowing. The pain that Gaeun was feeling couldn’t be stop by merely words and warm hands of Do Kyungsoo.

“Oppa, make them go away. Make all of them go away,” Gaeun said why crying even harder. She was bawling her heart out.

“I will. I will. Gaeun, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you have to go through this because of me,” Kyungsoo hugged her and patted her head lightly to comfort her. He whispered more words to her ears to soothe her; between ‘it’s all just a nightmare’ and ‘everything will be fine’. But deep inside, Kyungsoo was wrenched because he couldn’t protect the person he loves.

“What did I do wrong? All I did was love you. Why is loving someone wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong about loving me, baby. People are wrong. I just…I just need to,” Kyungsoo sighed heavily in the end, because he himself was dead sure he couldn’t fix all of this.

“I’m sorry for being in love with you, Gaeunie,” he took Gaeun’s hand and kept his gaze there. By now, he has lost courage to see Gaeun’s face. Silence surrounded them.

“Look, why don’t you stay in our dorm for a while? We have great security. You’ll be safe there,” Kyungsoo suggested.

“Oppa, if I stay there, who’s going to live here? My parents are not around anymore, remember,” Gaeun was smiling. Kyungsoo had wondered how a fragile soul was still able to smile at times like this.

“Just for the mean time. I’ll get help to clean this mess too,” Kyungsoo was more eager to work this crazy plan of his. Gaeun let out a small laugh, as she realised how hard her boyfriend is trying to make ends meet for them.

“You’re crazy, you know that?” Kyungsoo was utterly in bliss when he saw her laughing by now.

“Crazy for you,” he can’t remember when was the last time he was really this giddy from loving someone so much.

“Okay. I’ll think about it. But today, I’m staying here. And! You can’t stay with me. Because you have a music show to go to later,” Gaeun tried her best to not feel miserable again by thinking how amazing Kyungsoo would look on stage.

Kyungsoo didn’t fight back. Gaeun knows what’s best. Behind the petite figure and shy outlook, she is a wise young lady. Kyungsoo didn’t want to go back without helping Gaeun out. So he helped to take all the flowers out and washed away some of the rotten eggs stains on the ground while Gaeun have a shower. And after, he went in after being invited by Gaeun for some coffee.

“Oppa, meet me at the usual snack shop after you’re done with your schedule. I have something to tell you,” Kyungsoo nodded and smiled at her. Little did he know, what she was going to tell him would change everything he had been holding on to.

* * *

Gaeun made sure that no one was at the snack shop, except the cashier and her, before calling Kyungsoo that it was okay for him to come. She sat in front of the shop as she waited for him. Gaeun was nervous. She’s not sure if Kyungsoo’s going to accept it but she had to do it. For the good of everyone’s part.

“You’re here,” Kyungsoo came and pecked Gaeun’s cheek before taking a seat in front of her.

“So, what did you want to tell me?” a momentary silence before Gaeun finally spoke.

“I received a death threat,” Gaeun said something else from what she originally had planned.

“Baby, you know they’re not real. I bet whoever sent those wouldn’t even dare to kill an ant,” Kyungsoo tried to enlighten her spirit, which worked.. Gaeun showed a rather pleasant smile.

“And…I want us to part,” a change too soon. Gaeun’s tone that moment wasn’t favourable to Kyungsoo’s ears.

“What do you mean?”

“Oppa, it’s the best we should do. You can go on with your work and I can go on with my studies,” Gaeun tried hard to not tear up. She needs to be strong for this. She can’t show Kyungsoo that she doesn’t want this even though it’s what the need; a breakup.

“But why? Don’t you love me?” Kyungsoo held on to Gaeun’s hands. He didn’t want to let her go. She might just disappear if he even thinks about it.

“I love you. That’s why I’m doing this. I don’t want you to risk your career, your dreams, your hard work, your blood and sweat and tears for two years to debut…because of me. You don’t deserve to fall, Do Kyungsoo,” she’s not calling him ‘oppa’ anymore. Kyungsoo knows Gaeun’s serious about this. He stayed silent, contemplating whether he should agree to this or elope with Gaeun. The second choice always works out in dramas. But this was not a drama.

“Don’t cry anymore, okay? I’m the reason for all your tears and since I’ll soon be gone, you don’t have to cry anymore. Study well and get into a good college, alright?” Kyungsoo had let go of her hands because he can’t hold on anymore. If he kept holding on, one of them will fall with disgrace and failure.

“I loved you and I will always love you,” Kyungsoo’s genuine feelings would stay on even if she’s not with him anymore.

“Thank you for everything. And I hope you’ll keep this. As a memory of a friend,” Gaeun gave him a ring. Her ring. The class ring that Kyungsoo had given her when they hit their first month together. And now, a year of tears and laughter comes to an end.

Kyungsoo leaned in and kissed her lips right there and then. It would be their last kiss, the kiss of goodbye.

* * *

It has been a month since he last seen Gaeun and Kyungsoo had tried every single day to fight the urge to call her. He doesn’t have a reason to call her anyways. However, the phone rang one day.

‘Kyungsoo-sshi?” too polite and he doesn’t like it.

“Gaeun-ah, how are you?” Kyungsoo replied. He wanted to hear ‘I miss you’, ‘Let’s get back together’ but he was barely being wishful.

“I’m fine. I just finished the college entrance exams. I hope I do well,” at least she sounds very happy.

“That’s good. Don’t worry. You’re the smartest person alive. You’ll get into the national university,” Kyungsoo assured.

“My Gaeun~ Hurry up. They’re waiting,” another voice was heard through the phone. A guy.

“Who’s that?” Kyungsoo asked, braving himself for the worst.

“Umm…a friend. I have to go now. Good luck in your winter concert. Bye,” the call ended. Kyungsoo was happy that Gaeun’s fine but his heart was more than shattered now. Practically dust under his ribcage.

* * *

Kai decided to leave Kyungsoo alone when he couldn’t open the door to their room during Christmas night. He knew Kyungsoo was having a hard time letting go of Gaeun and he wanted to give him space, time, anything possible for him to feel better. Everyone was out in the living room for some fruit cake and beer, except Kyungsoo.

In the dark room, Kyungsoo was sitting in a corner. Hugging his knees together and staring into black vision. Collecting his clamorous thoughts although doing so would only make his heart more painful. He started to remember all the things he went through with Gaeun. The first time he met her in the snack shop. The first time he fell in love with her. The first time he held her hands. The first time they kissed under the rain. The first time he made her cry.

His eyes glistened. He wanted all of it to return but it’s impossible. It would only hurt Gaeun and himself. He closed his eyes and salty, clear teardrops fell from his eyes, sliding off his cheeks and dropped down. All good things will come to an end. And with the end, it was Do Kyungsoo’s time to cry.