[Time remaining: 1 year]

Chanyeol blinked a few times before tearing his gaze away from Baekhyun and the guy he was hugging, he faced Luhan. “Can I…Can I talk to you?”

Luhan unconsciously tilted his head to the side. “A-about what?”

“About Baekhyun.”

“He’s your what?!” Luhan was literally screaming in Chanyeol’s face. He couldn’t believe he was hearing this. He really couldn’t. Not when he knows Kris is in love with Baekhyun, who doesn’t remember having a life with a husband in the name of Park Chanyeol.

“I didn’t know why he left, Luhan. I really don’t know why. We never really fight. And this,” Chanyeol took his necklace with Baekhyun’s ring on it, and showed it to Luhan, “this is the only thing I have of him since the last 3 years, save for his clothes.”

The Chinese took the necklace with the ring from Chanyeol’s palm and stared at it. He blinked for a few times before talking. “Chanyeol, I—I don’t know what to say.” Luhan said, breathlessly. “I just saw Baekhyun. I swear I didn’t know anything. I just saw him on the street, lying, with blood pooling around his head. I took him to the hospital and the moment he woke up, he just couldn’t remember his name. Then the doctor told me he had amnesia. And then when he already found out his name, I asked him if he wanted me to help him look for people who possibly knows him, he told me no, that he was okay, that he didn’t need any help. I don’t know why he said that, though.”

The doctor told me he had amnesia. That sentence had struck Chanyeol really hard. He didn’t even get to hear the other things Luhan said. Baekhyun couldn’t remember him because his husband has an amnesia. His Baekhyun has an amnesia. Chanyeol blinked.

The doctor told me he had amnesia.

He had amnesia.

Amnesia.

Baekhyun has an amnesia.

“And Chanyeol?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry but I think you deserve to know this.”

Chanyeol blinked at Luhan who was fidgeting on his seat. “What is it? What else do I have to know?”

“Kris. He’s in love with your husband. A-and I think…I think Baekhyun feels something f-for Kris.”

Hearing it, Chanyeol froze. He was just eyeing Luhan. A few moments later, he tried to smile although his lips were quivering, trying not to take that seriously. “You’re kidding, right?” But Luhan only shook his head, confirming that he wasn’t toying with Chanyeol.

The tall man’s smile faltered. He propped his arms on the table and cupped his head with his hands. Why is this happening to me? He bit his lips. There’s a lot of things going on inside his mind. First, his husband having amnesia. Second, Jongin lied and hid everything from him. Third, the Baekhyun feeling something for Kris. And the way Baekhyun rushed to Kris when they arrived earlier. Was that it?

Does Jongin still know about this? Was he still hiding something from me? I’m going to lose my mind if this continues…

“Chanyeol?” Chanyeol looked up at the voice who called his name, and he saw the blonde his husband was hugging earlier. “Thank you for taking care of Baekhyun.” He said, smiling.

“Uh, Yifan.” Luhan tried catching his attention, to which the other Chinese turned his head and hummed. Luhan stood up, momentarily closing his eyes and sighed. “You were never really introduced, right?” He asked, receiving a nod from Kris. “He’s Park Chanyeol…and I’m sorry to tell you this but…he’s Baekhyun’s husband.”

Kris froze. He felt his surrounding become cold. He couldn’t move. How could he? Just as when he thought he could finally start anew, this would go exploding right in front of his eyes. The he swallowed visibly.

“Baekhyun’s not a Byun anymore, as Chanyeol had said. He’s already a Park since the day they were married.”

Kris chuckled dryly. “You must be kidding me.” His Chinese accent were made obvious with anxiety.

“It’s true.” Chanyeol defended. He took off his own ring, and showed it to Kris. “It has his name on it.”

“And this,” Luhan said, showing another ring to Kris, the ring that was Baekhyun’s. “This is Baekhyun’s ring. It has Chanyeol’s name written inside.”

Kris took both rings. He lips fell open when his eyes made contact with the engraved names inside the rings.

Park Chan and Park Baek

Kris felt his eyes grew heavy as he gave the rings back to Chanyeol. “I see.” He said, quietly. And without another word, he turned around and walked to his room.

Why does it have to be like this?

Why do I always have to be left out?

Do I deserve this?

Kris lied on his back on the bed. He closed his eyes, hoping for everything to be just a dream. He wanted to cry but he couldn’t. Maybe his tears had already dried up. Maybe. I haven’t even made my move yet I’m already losing. Just why does everything have to be unfair to me?

“Kris?”

The blonde shot up to a sitting position. He sniffed before telling the person on the other side of the door to go in.

“Kris.”

“Baekhyun. What’s wrong?”

“Kris. I…I…” Baekhyun looked down on his feet, his voice trailing down. The Chinese walked toward him and guided him inside. The smaller sat down on Kris’ bed and covered his face with his hands.

“Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun looked at him with tears making their way down his cheeks and his eyes bloodshot. “What does 5 years mean?”

Both of Kris’ brows were raised, confused with Baekhyun’s question. “Wh—what 5 years?”

Baekhyun tore his gaze off of Kris and looked down on his lap. He fumbled with his hands as he was sniffling.

Kris clicked his tongue before kneeling in front of Baekhyun. He held Baekhyun’s hands in his, “What is it?”

The younger thinned his lips before pulling his hands off of Kris’ hold. Baekhyun kneeled in front of the Chinese and wrapped his arms around him. “I’m scared of him.”

For a second, Kris hesitated to wrap his arms around the smaller frame but he decided against it. Kris hugged Baekhyun back and drew circles on his back, trying to comfort the younger. “Scared of who? Chanyeol?”

Baekhyun nuzzled on Kris’ neck before nodding. Kris heard the smaller sniffled as he felt hot wetness on his neck.

“Baekhyun, stop crying. He’s not going to hurt you. He’s no—”

“—He already did.”

Kris stopped drawing circles on Baekhyun’s back, he patted him instead. “I’m sure he didn’t mean to do it.”

He pulled away from Kris and stared at his face. “Why are you so nice, Kris?”

The other just smiled at him before cupping his face. Kris moved his thumb and wiped Baekhyun’s tears away. If I become the opposite of nice, it still wouldn’t make me hurt less. “I don’t want you crying again, okay?”

The younger looked down and sighed before looking up at Kris again and smiled at him. He nodded. Baekhyun hugged Kris again who was caught off guard, resulting with Kris laying on his back and the other male on top of him, settled in between the blonde’s legs. Baekhyun immediately pulled back but stayed on top of Kris. “Sorry about that.” He let out a nervous chuckle.

Kris smiled and waved it off with a “No, it’s—” He froze on the spot when he felt Baekhyun’s lips against his. It felt really nice. Baekhyun’s lips was so soft. He hated himself for liking it. “Baekhyun’s married!” he yelled to himself. He hated himself because he couldn’t move. He hated it more when Baekhyun cupped his face and started to move his lips. Kris hated that this is happening. Even more when his hands seemed to have a mind of its own as it wrapped themselves on Baekhyun’s waist and his lips started to move also. And that’s when he realized he was already kissing Baekhyun back.

This felt right but Kris knew that this is wrong. He tried to gently push Baekhyun back but he couldn’t.

Baekhyun pulled away when they were already running out of breath. He bit his lips as he was staring on Kris’ swollen pair. “I…” he sighed and looked at Kris’ directly in the eyes. “I don’t remember anything about my past, but I like you, Kris. I really do like you. And I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t be feeling this way.” Kris was staring at him blankly. Hearing no response at all, Baekhyun got off of Kris and the other got up on his own. Baekhyun bowed down, mumbling apologies to the older and proceeded to go back to his own room.

I really have to control myself. Kris thought as he let his body fall on his bed.

Few nights have passed and Baekhyun always woke up in the middle of the night, crying. He always dreams about something he doesn’t know. He always dreams about playing hide and seek, and then resting under a certain tree. He had also heard some voice.

Baekhyun rested his back on the headboard and pulled his knees close to his chest. He sobbed and let his head fall down.

“Chanyeol…”

He froze as soon as the name came out of his mouth. No. He covered his mouth with his hand and shook his head.

The next night, Baekhyun woke up with Luhan on the bed, sitting just beside him, and Kris standing near the door, both were looking at him really worried.

“Thank goodness, you’re awake!” Luhan wiped off something in his face that Baekhyun had registered as…tears?

“Did you cry?” Baekhyun immediately pulled himself up when Luhan nodded. “Why?”

“You were screaming,” Baekhyun looked at the tall male by the door who answered for Luhan who was still sniffling, “I guess you had a dream. You were screaming his… Ch-Chanyeol’s name.”

“A-and you were saying things like ‘I don’t want to die just yet’.” Luhan hugged Baekhyun while the other’s face was blank as he hugged back. “Baekhyun, you’re not dying, okay? You’re not.”

“Baek, I think you should talk to him.” Kris said. Baekhyun just looked at him, still not believing that he screamed Chanyeol’s name.

“I also think you should.” Luhan suddenly pulled back and placed his hands on Baekhyun’s shoulders. “Believe me or not, Baek, he knows you.”

Baekhyun shook his head. “No. I can’t. I won’t talk to him. How can you be so sure that he knows me?”

The smaller Chinese sighed before saying, “Baek, he talked to me, and I won’t tell you anything. You should know everything from him, and maybe you’ll get your memories back. Just try and talk to him.”

“I can’t. I’m scared. What if—what if he…”

Kris tsked before sitting on the bed. “Baek, you are so stubborn. Listen, you trust us right? You trust me and Luhan?” He continued staring at Baekhyun until the younger nodded. “If you trust us, then you have to believe us when we say he’s not going to hurt you. This is for you, Baek—Baekhyun. We’re doing this for you, so please help yourself too if you wanted to remember.”

Luhan can only hang his head down as he was listening to Kris talking to Baekhyun. It was unlikely for Kris to talk like he was right now. It hurt Luhan deep inside that Kris is hurting himself just to help the one he loves.

The next days that went by, Kris managed to force Baekhyun to have some talk with Chanyeol. It was hard, of course. Since Kris liked Baekhyun and he knew now that Baekhyun likes him back, but he’s aware that everything is wrong. He doesn’t have the right to like what other people owns. He has to stop liking Baekhyun, really, he has to. Because Baekhyun belongs with Chanyeol, and they were already married, he can’t just shove himself and wreck everything that Chanyeol and Baekhyun had just because Baekhyun lost his memory.

[Time remaining: 11 months]

“Are you sure he won’t—”

“Baek.” Kris said in a warning tone. Baekhyun asked him for the seventh time already. “He wouldn’t hurt you, okay?”

When they arrived at the café, which was their meeting place, Kris gently pushed Baekhyun inside saying, “Go, Baek. I’ll just be around.”

“But Kris—”

“For the 8^th time, Baek. You’ll be fine. He won’t hurt you.” Kris offered him a smile before Baekhyun surrendered with a sigh.

Baekhyun hesitated when he saw Chanyeol. He wanted to run out of the café and never come back and just hide himself behind Luhan but when he turned to do what he wanted to, he was meet with Kris, watching his move from the outside of the café, through its window, and the Chinese showed him a two thumbs up while mouthing, ‘You can do it!’

Baekhyun bit his lips before nodding and slowly walked toward the table where Chanyeol was seated.

When Chanyeol looked up at him, he saw the giant blink several times, as if processing something before blurting out, “Baekhyun.”

Chanyeol wanted to, but he restrained himself from standing up and enveloping Baekhyun into a bone-crushing hug for he doesn’t want to scare away the small male.

“Well, how are you?” He asked, trying to ease the thick atmosphere in their table.

Ignoring his question, Baekhyun eyed him intently, “Who are you? Wh—”

“He’s your husband.” Another voice said.

Baekhyun shifted his attention to a tan male who took the seat next to Chanyeol. He observed the male quietly, trying to think of the possible answer that would tell him who this guy is.

“I’m Jongin. Kim Jongin, in case you also don’t remember me.” He said as if reading Baekhyun’s thoughts. “And Park Chanyeol here, he’s your husband. Shh.” Jongin said, holding a finger to his own lips before continuing, “Let me talk first, Yeol, since I know some reasons why he disappeared all of a sudden.” Then he looked at Baekhyun, straight in the eyes. “Baekhyun, do you not feel sick at all?”

Baekhyun narrowed his eyes at the word ‘sick’. Why would he be feeling sick? Immediately, he wanted to cry, though he didn’t see any reason as to why he should, but he was feeling too weak all of a sudden.

“Ah, pardon me. I just, you know, you look somewhat gloomy.”

It wasn’t true, Baekhyun knew it, for when Jongin talked, he could see something glitters in his eyes, but he was so into something he was feeling to even point out what was in the tan male’s eyes.

“I’ll just get us coffee okay?” Chanyeol said, as he stood up and went to the counter to line up, leaving Baekhyun with Jongin.

“Baekhyun,” Jongin started again, feeling more confident now that Chanyeol’s not with them in the table. “Do you really not remember anything at all?” When Jongin received no respons, other than Baekhyun blinking twice, he sighed and continued. “Okay. This is more difficult than I pictured out how it was going to be, but, alright. Baekhyun, you, uh, there was one night when you called me and said you have to go away from Chanyeol. You said you don’t want to leave him but you have to, so you thought of leaving and giving him time to move on and continue with his life without you so it won’t be painful once you’re really gone. Does that ring something in your mind?”

Baekhyun only blinked again, and Jongin almost wanted to give up already. He glanced at the counter and saw Chanyeol telling the guy right there his order, so Jongin focused his gaze on Baekhyun again in an attempt to hurry up. “Don’t tell this to Chanyeol, and to anyone because when you left, you told me that I was the only person you trust with your condition.”

Baekhyun listened, and he almost feel pitiful for Chanyeol because, although he couldn’t believe what this Jongin guy had just told him, if it was true, then leaving his husband—as what was revealed to him earlier by Jongin—is probably the most stupid thing he’ll do.

Chanyeol came back just as when Jongin was still about to ask Baekhyun more questions, and after a short while came his order.

The three of them fell quiet at the moment. Chanyeol was sipping on his coffee and stared outside the window, hoping and silently praying that Baekhyun would remember him already. Jongin was thinking whether or not he’ll talk with Baekhyun in private to tell him things about Baekhyun that in the past, Baekhyun doesn’t want any other person to know.

While they’re silent, Baekhyun was staring at Chanyeol. He thought if Chanyeol wasn’t married, and he didn’t lost his memory, and if they met in another way, maybe he’ll like this guy. One look from Chanyeol, you wouldn’t really be able to say that he’s married, his face is too young for it, but the ring on his ring finger says otherwise. To Baekhyun, Chanyeol looked like a perfect husband.

While he’s at it, Jongin’s words loomed in his mind.

He suffered 4 years without you Baekhyun—in which he spent the three years of those in your bed, inside your house, almost not eating at all.

He couldn’t imagine being married, he couldn’t imagine leaving someone alone for 4 years and not comeback. Baekhyun couldn’t even imagine losing someone, he didn’t know how it felt but he was sure it was hard and Baekhyun thought that Chanyeol must have been strong to carry on to all these years.

I always come by at your house to bring him food, and all those times I was in your house, Baekhyun all his does is just cry and mumble your name.

Baekhyun felt like he was about to cry as he start to imagine Chanyeol doing what Jongin told him. If Chanyeol really did that for 3 years, he must have love Baekhyun so much.

“Were you telling the truth?” he asked suddenly which made the two male across him blurt out a ‘huh’ together.

Chanyeol got over it first. “We are.”

“Can you prove it?” Baekhyun asked, he wasn’t challenging them. He just wanted to know if they were telling the truth because their story is so convincing plus he didn’t know how to explain why when he woke up in the middle of the night, he just muttered Chanyeol’s name.

“He can.” Jongin piped in, pointing at Chanyeol and said with much confidence, “He sure can, he’s your husband, he knew everything about you, it would be easy for him.”

Baekhyun just stared at Chanyeol, waiting for some response or what, but he didn’t get any so he sighed, “Prove it. Make me remember everything.”

If these things were true, Baekhyun thought, then just have to give Chanyeol a chance to prove it. One chance won’t hurt. It was also for the sake of his identity. And he felt bad for Chanyeol, having to suffer for 4 years of losing his husband thinking he was dead when he wasn’t.

Baekhyun didn’t know it this would end up well, he didn’t even know if they were telling him the real things but he has to take a chance. He sighed, “If you are really my husband,” he said, directly to Chanyeol, “and what he,” Baekhyun pointed to Jongin but wasn’t taking his glance off of Chanyeol, “…said was true, then I want to remember. I want to know why I left you in the first place.”

Baekhyun stopped for a while to think. He suffered 4 years without you Baekhyun. Jongin’s voice was all over his mind again.

4 years.

Then, Baekhyun remembered something.

—5 years, Baekhyun.

Does that 4 years has something to do with 5 years? He thought. Only one way to find out: I have to remember.