Jessica’s POV

Stephan Hwang, he’s my first love in high school. I was so inlove with this guy. With his handsomeness, cleverness, and all about his personality, he took my heart. He was so popular in our school, almost all the girls in our school even the nerdies like me (but well I wasn’t that nerdy like everybody described me. I was just a too-hard-working person until seldom spent my time with my friends) were head over heels in love with him.

Day by day I fell for him deeper. He was so perfect for me. I don’t know if it was only me who felt he was cooler, cooler, and cooler or not. And it was the day when I told my friends about this ‘fangirling’ feeling. Yoona, Sunny, & Taeyeon were surprised when I told them everything. I asked why and they told me that Stephan was too popular. They might be worried if Stephan wouldn’t notice my feeling and I would just hurt my own heart if I kept loving him. I know they were right. All popular girls in our school had also asked him out but still got rejected. But my strength for loving him didn’t stop. It kept growing bigger inside my heart that bothering me so much for 1 year. I had enough with this, so I asked my friends for helping me to confess to him. I know that sounded crazy but what should I do? It was the only way for me even he would reject me. At least I tried and that would no longer bother my heart.

The next day I had convinced myself to confess to him. I would accept all the risk. So I searched for his spot and I was lucky that he was in his class room; alone. Yeah we took different subjects. Then I approached him and greeted him. Stupid I was for greeting him, he even didn’t greet me back.

“Stephan..” I called to get her attention.

“yeah?” he looked up from his book while sitting manly.

My legs started to weaken up. I couldn’t talk properly so i just could stutter.

“I-I.. I..”

“you..?”

“I like you! No I meant I love you!” I said a bit loud and fast.

“oh.”

‘what?! He only replied me that?! I couldn’t believe it, he is so heartless.’

“…”

He just kept silent and went back to his book. ‘ugh I envied that book. It got all his attention’

“s-so?”

“huh? So what?” it was harsh enough.

I couldn’t think properly. I thought it was his rejection already. But I just needed him to convince.

Suddenly the bell rang.

I was so embarassed and also hurt. I couldn’t hold these tears anymore, so I decided to go out before all his classmate came. I was about to walk away after turning around when someone called me.

“wait..!” that melodious voice to my ears just called me. I thought he would take back his word and said ‘I Love You Too’ to me, so I turned back to face him. And that was the time when all his classmates came back from the cafeteria.

“y-yeah?” I said slowly. All his classmates were looking at me suspiciously. ‘what the hell? I'm not a killer nor a thief.’

Suddenly he stood up and put his book down on his desk and announced something. I thought that he would introduce me as her ‘new’ girlfriend that also made me smile silently. But no, “guys, this nerdy loves me.” When he said that all his classmates were shocked, mostly the girls. They even shot me glares.

I was so hurt, really hurt. My tears rolled down to my cheeks already but I just kept my head down so others wouldn’t notice me crying. I was so disappointed, he ashamed me like this in front of his classmates. My friends were right. I shouldn’t do this. I thought that if I confessed, it would be better for me, but no. it’s double more painful than I imagined. If I just listened to my friends before, I wouldn’t be broken like this. It so much better to keep my feeling for forever even watching him with other girls.

“so what should I say to her?”

“reject her! Reject her!”

“what’s the reason?” I was about to run out but he encircled my shoulders with his muscled arm.

I looked up to him and send my ‘what-are-you-doing?!’ look with my teary eyes.

Everyone kept saying ‘reject her’ many times. I knew already he would say no to my confession. So I struggled from his embrace and face him.

“o-okay I know the answer already.” Then I ran out from there and started crying endlessly. I kept running, running, and running until my legs brought me to the park behind this school where rarely people visit.

I just sat there and started crying. I let all my feelings out. I was so broken into million pieces. I ditched my next class, I spent the day there, and waited until the school over. That