prologue;

Song Hyemi doesn’t know what to do. She doesn’t know what to do when she finds Nam Jihoon, her boyfriend of seven months, with his tongue down some other girl’s throat and his hands up some other girl’s skirt. All she can do is watch, in absolute horror, as the other girl opens her eyes and shrieks. All she can do is stare when Jihoon turns around and locks eyes with her, looking as if he only regrets the fact that he was caught in the first place.

All Song Hyemi can do is turn on her heels and run away.

~.~.~

Hyemi figures that drinking away her grief is probably a terrible idea, in retrospect. Everything’s spinning and turning and the faces in the crowd seem to blur a bit. But she doesn’t really care. She thinks she’s having fun, though, in this weird, convoluted kind of way. She giggles when she runs straight into another person and hold out her hands to steady herself.

“Oh, gosh. I’m sooo sorry. You just kind of came out of nowhere, you know, like fwoooosh.” She says, slurring a bit, and she thinks maybe she should bow for good measure, so she does.

“Hyemi-ah.” A familiar voice responds, sounding annoyed, and Hyemi nearly falls over. “You’re drunk.”

“Anddd you’re not.” Hyemi responds, wondering why exactly Byun Baekhyun found it fun to point out the obvious. Hyemi eyes her best friend, suspiciously, his eyeliner-lined eyes and side-swept hair looking unusually tidy. Usually Byun Baekhyun was the first one drunk and messy. There was obviously something wrong with him.

Baekhyun sighs, “Let’s get you home, Hyemi-ah.”

Hyemi pouts, shaking her head, “I don’t wanna.”

“I know you’re upset about Jihoon—”

“How do you know about that?” Hyemi interrupts, furrowing her eyebrows, because suddenly she wasn’t having as much fun anymore.

“News travels fast, jagiya.” Baekhyun replies and Hyemi absolutely hates the way his warm eyes seem to be full to the brim with pity.

“Well, I’m not upset.”

“Really?” Baekhyun asks, raising his eyebrows, skeptically. “So if I were to, I don’t know, tell you all about your first date with Jihoon you wouldn’t start crying?”

“Nope.” Hyemi says, as casually as she can.

Baekhyun tilts his head to the side, smiling a little sadly. “He took you to the little park just off the road from whe—”

She smacks his arm as hard as she can, but somehow manages to miss (she blames it on the soju), and glares at Baekhyun. “I didn’t give you permission to tell me.” Hyemi murmurs and suddenly she really doesn’t want to be here anymore.

“Do you want to get out of here?” Baekhyun says, quietly.

Hyemi nods, biting her lip. “Yeah, this party is lame.”

Baekhyun just chuckles as he puts a gentle arm around Hyemi’s waist and guides her out the door.

~.~.~

She’s sitting cross-legged on a kitchen stool as he flits around from drawer to drawer until he finally finds a clean water glass. He makes a rather annoyed face at her and she giggles. There’s a long moment of comfortable silence and Hyemi can’t help but think about Jihoon, she wants to stop but she can’t. “Stop thinking about it.” Baekhyun says, a little forcefully.

“I can’t, though.” She replies, frowning because she’s still slurring and he’ll just dismiss her if she’s slurring, but at the same time she doesn’t care. “I can’t because. Because this is the fourth time, Baek. This is the fourth time someone’s cheated on me. Is there. Is there something wrong with me?”

Hyemi doesn’t want to cry, she really doesn’t, but she’s drunk and sad and she’s been cheated on for the fourth time (which leaves her with a record of four to one) and this is the first time she’s ever let that question leave the confines of her mind. She briefly wonders how pathetic she must look, sitting on the kitchen stool, staring at the kitchen counter, and biting her lips to keep them from trembling. She doesn’t really expect arms to wrap around her body because although Baekhyun is affectionate, he’s uncomfortable around tears. He usually speaks to her bluntly, occasionally holds her hand during the really scary parts of horror films, and knows how to keep her from panicking. They had come to a sort of mutual agreement to never cry in front of each other when they were barely thirteen. They both hated tears.

“Yah, Mi Mi.” Baekhyun whispers into her ear and she can’t help but smile at the use of his old nickname for her. “There’s nothing wrong with you, .” His fingers brush through her hair and he feels like an anchor.

“You’re just saying that because you’re supposed to.” She whispers against his chest, letting her fingers twist into his shirt.

“I’m saying that because I think it’s true. Now, stop crying and let’s get you to bed.” Baekhyun says forcefully, pulling her up a little roughly. He watches with narrowed eyes and crossed arms as she drinks two glasses of water before he practically pulls her up the stairs. She doesn’t understand why he’s acting so angry. It’s almost laughable when he practically tucks her into bed, expression still as stormy as before.

“Oppa, are you mad at me?” She asks, eventually, when the silence becomes too much.

He pauses and looks down at her, eyes softening. He reaches out and brushes a strand of hair out of her eyes. “Yes.”

She pulls her legs to her chest and looks up at him, confused. “Why?”

“Because there is nothing wrong with you. Because you’re blaming yourself for all the those ers pulled. Because you’re crying.” Baekhyun says, matter-of-factly.

The expression on his face reminds her of stone and she’s suddenly worried that maybe he hates her (she’s always worried that he hates her, that he only tolerates her because even she can barely tolerate herself sometimes). “I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad at me.”

Baekhyun just sighs and brushes a finger along that spot on her neck, just below her right ear, that works as an instant relaxer for her. She doesn’t know why but whenever she’s kissed or touched there, her knees wobble and she feels sleepy. She still refuses to actually think about how he found out about that spot because, boy, had it been awkward. “Just go to sleep.”

She huffs, pulling away from him, ignoring the way her eyes are already drooping. “No, I don’t wanna.”

She feels the pad of his thumb rubbing along that stupid spot and she yawns, despite herself. “Please.” Baekhyun breathes.

Frowning, she yawns again, letting her eyes fall closed a little. “Okay, fine. Just. Please don’t be mad at me, oppa. Please don’t go. Please don’t leave me.” She breathes, a little slowly.

There’s a long pause and she doesn’t think she’ll be awake to hear his response, since he’s still massaging his thumb against her neck. “I’ll never leave you, idiot.” Baekhyun replies and then she feels him nudging her to the side a bit and she can’t help but smile as she scoots over so he can slide in under the blanket beside her. He puts an arm around her waist and tucks her head beneath his chin. “You’re stuck with me forever.”

“Ugh, gross.” She replies, snuggling closer. He just chuckles, shaking the bed a little, and she sighs because she feels so safe here in her best friend’s arms. He feels like her anchor and it’s so reassuring.

“Sleep.” He commands and she yawns, nodding tiredly.

~.~.~

That is the last time Song Hyemi sees Byun Baekhyun.

She woke up alone the next morning and figured he went home to change.

She walked to school alone the next morning and figured he was just running late.

The seat beside her, all the way in the back corner of the classroom, remained empty for the rest of the day (and weeks, months, years to come).

Her texts went unanswered. And when she finally called during lunch, the operator had announced that his number was unavailable.

His house was empty, cars gone, front door wide open swinging back and forth back and forth on its hinges, and when she gathered the courage to actually enter the house everything was gone. The walls were stripped bare, bright white squares prominent against the off white walls. The only thing left in his room had been his mattress. Everything and anything related to Byun Baekhyun was gone.

Byun Baekhyun was gone.

And with each passing day Song Hyemi learns to hate him.

With each passing day, Song Hyemi learns to forget Byun Baekhyun, just as the world around her already has.

a/n: oh god i hate myself so much right now for starting another multichap while im already writing one. but this lil plotbunny refused to go away so here i am.

please give me some feedback!! it would really help me out! 

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