Kris released a large amount of air as he sat with his back against his seat. After being done with his schedules, he finally arrived home at his dormitory, where he was greeted by a pile of shoes bombarded at the front door. Irritated and frustrated, he pushed hard against the door until he was finally able to squeeze himself into the complex. In front of him laid a field of mine trap full of shoes just waiting to trip him. Kris managed to cross with little difficulty but towards the end, he fell forward, tripping over his own pair of sneakers. 

Cursing and mumbling under his breath, Kris quickly pulled himself back up. If that wasn't the worst of it, Chen decided to take a picture within that time before snidely laughing and disappearing into his room. Kris shook his head in embarrassment before he headed to the kitchen to grab something to eat. It was 1am in the morning and they all had to get up at 6am for another photoshoot in the morning.

While waiting for his food to heat up, Kris massaged his temporal lobes with his thumb and index finger.  

He blinked once as the pot in front of him started sizzling. Snapping out of his thoughts, he quickly reached for the pot, emptying out the water before serving himself. 

Who is this girl...?

Kris stared at his food while his mind travelled back to the letters he read in the past month. There were two particular letters that stuck out and crept into his mind since he read them. One of them was handwritten very neatly, while the other seemed to be written by a preschooler who had just learned to write the alphabet.  

He let out another long sigh before inserting a mouthful of noodles into his mouth. Though he tried to digress, Kris wasn't able to take his mind off of the two specific letters. 

It wasn't the first time Kris sat contemplating on a couple fan letters. He took these letters personally. It was one of the only ways he had direct contact with his fans, so he took the letters to heart. Most of them consisted of fangirlling, compliments, concern, and worries. All of which he took in with gratitude. However, this was different. These two letters that he had received extracted a feeling he hadn't experienced in a while. 

Worry. Concern. The feeling of helplessness.

Kris clenched one of his fist as he continued eating with his other hand. Here, he thought the fans didn't understand what their favorite idols were going through. Here, he thought he was struggling alone. He couldn't complain. He couldn't do anything. He was the leader of EXO and his duty was to keep that image. Chic and cool. Just how the fans wanted it. Just how they all labeled him.

And yet, there was a fan out there, who could only wait for her life to end. Someone who looked up to him as a role model. Someone who's struggles were far beyond his but still compares them as similar. 

But she's slowly giving up...

Kris couldn't help but feel that deteriorating fighting spirit. He noticed that his breathing has increased its pace as he was so engrossed in his thoughts. Letting out a sigh of distress, he pushed his plate away as he didn't have the appetite anymore.

When he dragged his feet to his room, Kris noticed the disorganized, mound full of fanmail that greeted him. He looked over at Luhan and Xiumin, who were busy playing video games as they paid no attention to him entering the room.

"You guys didn't even bother sorting out the mail?" Kris asked, hinting the slightest sense of irritation as he looked through the letters. It wasn't long before he only saw his name on the envelops.

"We already did. Those are all yours," Luhan pointed out as he tapped endlessly at the spacebar before he threw his arms up in the air. "I win! Take that, Baozi!"

Xiumin did not take losses gently. Kris noticed the older figure clench his fist before he stood up in frustration and toppled over Luhan. However, Luhan being slightly taller and bigger than Xiumin, managed to pin the other down. The atmosphere grew lively as laughter and cheers emitted from the room. As tired as Kris was, he couldn't help but chuckle at the battle of the two elders of the group. It helped release the stress that he had built up throughout the day. 

As he organized and sorted out the letters, something caught Kris' eyes as it reflected the light of the room. With curiosity, Kris reached for the substance underneath the pile of letters still waiting to be organized and pulled out what appeared to be a gold medal.

Confusion hazed his mind as he wondered if this was a mistake. He broke the two wrestling couple up to ask if anything came with the medal, "Do you know anything about this?"

Luhan looked up with his doe-like eyes before Xiumin caught him off guard and pushed him off. With such force, Luhan fell straight onto his bottom, in which he let out a squeal in pain. Pouting and rubbing his bottom, Luhan turned his attention back to Kris, who sat there watching the two as though they were animals.  He scratched the back of his head in embarrassment before he answered, "Oh yeah, it was from someone with the initials K.Y..." He noticed Kris' eyes widen at the mention of the initials and it wasn't long before he eyed Kris in a jokingly suspiscious manner, "Wu Yi Fan, are you secretly dating someone??"

That phrase seemed to catch Xiumin's attention as he attentively perked his head and turned towards Kris. Kris snapped out of it, rolled his eyes and shook his head before he scrutinized the medal that lay in front of him. 

Something poked the back of his mind before Kris stated, "Wait, how did you know this was from K.Y? Was there a letter along with this?"

Xiumin and Luhan cackled at Kris' retorted question. Kris sat there, his breathing increasing its pace by the second as he tried to calm himself. Xiumin pulled out a piece of paper and handed it over to Kris. Kris eyed the elder carefully as he reached out for the folded note. However, Xiumin retreated his arm, still taking hold of the note as he teased, "First, who is K.Y.?"

Kris took in a deep breath before exerting it all out. Closing his eyes in an attempt to alleviate his frustration, he inhaled once more before opening his eyes. A swift movement followed after, where Kris reached for the note once more, grabbing it before Xiumin had the chance to fight back. Kris stuck out his tongue in triumph at the shorter elder, before he turned his attention back to the note and the medal that laid on his bed. 

The one letter that had him sitting at the edge of his seat. That one signature, K.Y., that had him wondering who's, what's, where's, and why's. Not hearing from this person for nearly a month worried him. He let out a sigh of preparation, a breath needed to anticipate for the best. Slowly revealing the content, Kris read:

Kris heard his steady breaths become uneven. His heart dropped as he read through the rest of the content. The same feelings--worry, concern, the feeling of helplessness--overwhlemed him again as his hands trembled, holding the letter.  

There's no way...