Story number: 4/30

Title: Starved

Pairing: Taeheon-Minwoo

Song: La la la(K-food)

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He was the starved carnival's whiteface. | He was the starving confectionary merchant.

He was so dirt poor that he had to starve himself. | He couldn't afford to lose the opportunity to reach his dreams again that he had no choice but to starve.

What would it take for them to end the starvation?

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The day the smiley, skinny boy stopped by the tent, and ogled wide eyed at all the candies, chocolates, cookies, ice creams and pop corns on display, it was a sunny day, no, not just a sunny day but a scorching burning day, evening to be exact. He didn't noticed it so much from the shades covering his eyes that helped to alleviate the blinding rays, but he could see it clearly from the trailing perspiration over the skinny boy's faceline, and how his leftover stains of makeups were melting, and staining his otherwise, perfect small face with trails of black eyemakeups, white foundation, and bright red lips. Gross, melted combination, to be exact.

"Wow..." The boy marvelled. He didn't know what to respond. He was used to seeing boys and girls as well, drooling over the candies at his stall, but only little, underaged ones. For an overgrown boy that looked like he's at least a late teenager, no, that was the first time.

He gave a courteous all-business, ice-cream man type of smile and politely asked what the boy would like. The boy was so eager that he kept moving around to inspect every single candy available, but in the end he only gave an embarrassed grin and said he wasn't buying and was just looking.

As the boy made his way back to the tent he probably lived in, which was, one of the many carnival tents set there, he could see the boy struggling to place something he kept in his hand into his costume's pocket. The boy was still wearing his clown suit, even after taking off the makeups sloppily. The boy's smile lingered before his shades, as if an infection. He wondered if it was really a smile, or just the remaining makeup that formed the generic smiley, because he didn't remember having ever seen such a wide smile.

It wasn't long enough to distract him from the pangs of hunger though, and the temptations spread right under his nose, the heavenly sweets he so craved for, but no...he could not afford to be rejected for being a fatty again. He dreamed of becoming a sportsman but was rejected due to his weight and metabolisme problem, and then he developed passion for music and performing, and he almost lost his chance again for the same problem, but he begged, he promised he would lose weight, he vowed to never cave into his temptations again for the sweet(and oily and carbs and whatever else) evils. Yet, he was forced to be in extremely close contact with them every single day without a rest. The damn tempting sweets.

If it wasn't for the woman's wailing and sob story that he's the only hope left to run the sweets business after her husband's death, he'd have run far, far away. But in the end, he stayed anyway. It didn't mattered anymore. He knew he owed them a favour. And they never mistreated him. They raised him like their own son in every sense since they never had one, which meant, not everything were rainbows and cotton candies. But it didn't change the fact that they had become his parents and he had become their son. And they expected him to live as their son for the rest of his life. How could he say no and left? Especially after the old man died leaving the wife going crazy and frantic, helpless, no one to turn to, but him?

And that, was how he ended up having to face the sweets, chocolates, candies, ice creams, pop corns as his friends, day in day out, at the carnival. He hated having to fight against the urge to indulge, everyday. He had all the privilege to have as much of them as he wanted, to his heart(or rather, stomach's) content. He was raised to love them anyway. There never was restriction or anything that ever came in between him and them. Not until he learnt something called ambition. Not until he learnt to dream.

It was late evening, and there weren't many kids during this time of the day. Most would've gone home or went for full course dinners with their parents. Nobody eat candies during dinner time. Not too long after, it was night time again. And the carnival were once again filled with people of all ages, walks of life, personalities and colourful clothings again. The blinding yellow lights, accentuated with colourful neon lights, and the loud joyful music blended with marching sound recording. He wasn't sure for what effect such terrorizing musics were played, but it helped distract him from the colourful sweet temptations, so it wasn't that bad.

Then, he saw it. Him. The skinny clown, who still looked skinny even after being bulked by his costume. Not to mention his pile of makeups. But he knew it was that boy. The smile was the same as ever, disturbingly too wide. Infectious. The kids surrounding him were all smiles as well. Not something strange, with that kind of smile, he thought. It reminded him of the scoldings he received during the latest trainee test he had.

"It's not just about dieting! Look at your performance just now. You hardly even smile. You look like a corpse. How are you going to become an entertainer with that face?!"

He promised he would change. He couldn't risk to be moving agency again. There were so many things about him, the agencies somehow was never happy about. The odd thing was, he knew it wasn't for his skills. They never complained about his singing. They never complained about his rapping. They never complained about his dancing either. Yet, he still was far from qualified. He knew he needed to change fast, before the next test comes. He just didn't know how. But the kid seemed to have all the reason in the world to smile so brightly, even without the need of the stupid smiley drawn on his face.

Feeling he was being watched, he averted his gaze, only to be met with a widely grinning little girl right before him, separated by the counter. 

'Why is everyone being so smiley today?'

"Uhh, yes?"

"That one." She pointed at a Doraemon-patterned lollipop and he obediently took it and handed it to her as cash changed hands. But she didn't immediately leave, and kept looking at him.

"Ahjussi...you look better when smiling like just now." She smiled again, and left.

His eyes trailed after her until she disappeared in the crowd. His thoughts trailing her words. Was he...smiling just now? He didn't notice it. His forehead scrunched with the unanswered question. After the little girl was no longer in sight, he dragged his gaze back to face the colourful torture he had to handle everyday. But before he could made it, he caught sight of the clown again, passing balloons to laughing kids, the wide smile never left his face.

That smile, it was infectious.

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The day he saved enough coins to buy the cheapest candy at the tent oozing promises of lavish sweetness, it was very late in the evening, the sun was setting in, and the hoardes of little children have slowly dispersed into peaceful quietness, signifying dinner time, and for him, resting time. Time to halt the prancings and take a break from the tiring routine of blowing, twisting and shaping balloons for the little carnival goers. Time to tone down the exaggerated foolish grins. Time to forget memorizing that it didn't matter that he's living mindlessly while making a fool of himself day after day, because all that matters was finding means to secure a few dollars in his hands by the end of the day, to continue living, to continue his family's survival, being a school dropout with no more parents and a line of little siblings. It's the time for his own. A treasure as fine as the candies he had eyed longingly for so long; as long as he had been working there as a carnival's clown.

Long has he dreamt of savouring the luxurious sugary treats. Would the shimmering pink ones taste sparkling? Would the sky blue ones taste like