Dear: God

Someone told me that if I wrote a letter on a paper, fold it and turn into paper boat, and sailed it into ocean, then You will read my letter and fulfill my wishes. He said that whenever and wherever i’m sad or felt down, i should wrote a letter to You and its the way to make me hope that someday you grant my wishes. Besides it made me strenght to face my problems while I waited patiently to You to answer my letter... Sound childish right? but believe me it works... So here I am now, sat on the edge while staring at the waves of sea, writing my last letter to You...

In this letter, I just want to say thank you to You and I just want You to grant my last wishes. God, thank you for letting me live until now. I never ever regret about everyting that You chose for me (well, there is one time that I felt regret about Your decision. But that was one time and now i never regret about anything).thank you for letting me in into their life, especially him. Thank you for letting me learned about friendship, family, betrayed, and falling in love.... Thank you for letting me had a wonderful creature inside my womb even at the last You take him to You (there was one time I hate You. And I felt awful about that. Sorry) Thank you for letting me make he feel my love even he didn’t love me back. Thank you for gave me a chance to let me stayed with him. And the last thank you for letting me stay for a while with my first and my last love...

And for my last wishes, I made a couple of selfish wishes to You. First, I want You to make Hayi and Hanbin and also Jenny and Taehyun  always happy, don’t let them stay in the middle of sorrow,and  accompany them to fulfill their dream. Second,make Minhoo and Hyesun, also Bigbang chingus and their family always happy and tell them how sorry I am for everything i’ve done to them... Third, always make Ahjumma Jung stayed healthy so she can look after him when i’m with You... Forth, even I know that You will take mrs. Kwon with You too, please let her remember about him and let he take care her for a while. And the last, please let Kwon Jiyong always happy, let people around him always happy, give him a good and healthy life so he can manage his company,blessing him, him remember me and how much i love him,and when he know about my condition and what i’ve done to him after i’m away, please let him move on and don’t make him feel guilty... also make him meet a wonderful woman who can love him wholeheartly, a woman can look after him, a woman who can give him an heir and heirs, and let them love each other unconditionally... I admitted it’s painful for me to see him with someone else. But I know i can do nothing. And for the last, please let me stay inside his heart. Please let him remember me as a woman who love him unconditionally and forever my heart always his. That’s what I want.

 I already check all of them and saw them happy with my own eyes. And I already let everything behind me. and with my condition now, see you!

-Love-

Park Sandara