title⇢ { 2/5 }

The title is really eye-catching and judging by it, the readers would be able to tell that it wasn't going to be a fluffy fanfic. But, was there a special reason why "in" wasn't capitalized like the other words in your title? Also, you didn't really mention about how Hyeri felt after Myungsoo died, thus the title wasn't very effective.

poster and background⇢ { 5/5 }

Present! But just a little note from me, the poster gave an impression that the story was going to be dark/mysterious. The dark colours that were used gave a wrong signal to me. But since the poster wasn't made by you, I will not deduct any marks.

description and foreword⇢ { 5/10 }

The description was alright, the layout is very different and unique as compared to others. However, you should take note of the phrasing of your sentances.

original: Hi, My name is Hyeri.

suggested: Hi, my name is Hyeri.

original: I have been living horribly for 4 years now.

suggested: I have been living horribly for the past 4 years.

original: Just read the story and you will found out.

suggested: Just read the story and you will find out.

original: Don't expect this story  to be a romance-comedy story..... It's not.

suggested: Don't expect it to be a romance-comedy one, because it's not.

original: It depressing me, Driving me crazy, My whole life is totally ruined.

suggested: It's depressing, to the point that it's driving me crazy.

original: A guy that is not even existed in this world anymore.

suggested: A guy that does not even exist in this world anymore.

content and main plot⇢ { 14/20 }

I really enjoy the part where Hyeri gets stuck in the math problem and Myungsoo helps her. This acted like the appetiser for the story because it has made me understand their relationship. Thus, it has triggered more emotion and thoughts as I continued reading. However, character death is quite common in asianfanfics. Thus, it has pulled down the originality points. Content was well delivered, you've tried to add in as many details as possible so I'll give you some credit for it.

characterisation⇢ { 10/15 }

Myungsoo is very typical. When he knew about his illness, he refused to let Hyeri know and even tried to act tough. From his actions, it was clear that he loves Hyeri a lot and he would never harm her. His letter at the end brought out a lot of emotions and also showed that he was selfless and he sincerely hoped that Hyeri could continue to be happy. If he isn't a perfect boyfriend, I don't know what is.

Hyeri is very human, lol. Humans face challenges on a dialy-basis. The challenges differ. For Hyeri, it was the math problems. The way she reacted showed that she has very low self-confidence and self-esteem. When Myungsoo mysteriously disappeared, she became very worried. Thus proving that Hyeri loves Myungsoo too. 

grammar and spelling⇢ { 6/15 }

original: I’ve tried my best to memorize all of the formulas from the day before but it's just not working! I even gave up on my sleep time last night reading and reading through all my books, my notes…

suggested: I’ve tried my best to memorize all of the formulas since the day before but it's just not working! I even gave up on my sleep time last night just to read through all my books, my notes…

original: He scans my scribbled answers before his face light up, a soft chuckle escapes from his lips.

suggested: He scans my scribbled answers before his face lights up, a soft chuckle escapes from his lips.

original: Jesus, I just embarrass myself yet again in front of the hottest male I’ve ever known in my mundane mortal life with my stupidity!

suggested: Jesus, I've just embarrassed myself yet again in front of the hottest male I’ve ever known in my mundane mortal life with my stupidity!

original: I will just go home and make myself happy, preparing my mental to get the usual E or F for the upcoming test. 

suggested: I will just go home and make myself happy. Then, I'll prepare myself for the usual grades "E" or "F" for the upcoming test. 

original: "You didn't even solve a question by your own."

suggested: "You didn't even solve a question on your own."

original: "…I will just try to do one more question. Just one, not more, okay?"

suggested: "…I will just try to do one more question. Just one, no more, okay?"

original: "I will study it tomorrow.

suggested: "I will study it tomorrow.

There are more, but I'll stop with these.

writing style⇢ { 6/10 }

First of all, your story is fine. The layout was fine too. But, you could improve on your grammar and phrasing. There were a lot of error in between the lines. You have a good use of vocabulary but the errors pushes the good points away. You can always type your chapter in Microsoft Word first before transferring over. Microsoft Word is a great editing software and it also helps to pick out your errors.

flow of the story⇢ { 7/10 }

The flow was generally fine. Questions started to arise when I was reaching the end. What happened to Hyeri? How did she cope with it? You stated in your description that she was leading a horrible life, but you didn't mention any of it in the chapter. 

entertainment⇢ { 8/10 }

I've had a great time reading it. Just improve on your phrasing and grammar and your story will be much better.

total⇢ { 63/100 }

bonus⇢ { 2/5 }

grand final⇢ 65%

Grade: B

reviewer's note: Thanks for requesting! I really hope that my review was up to standard. When you write in the future, you should always reread the chapter and spot for any errors. If you are unsure, you can always check them up. Microsoft Word will be a great help for these.