The worst thing about it was that I couldn’t do anything.

I couldn’t do anything to stop him. He was stronger than me. He proved that every time. When it happened the first time I tried to fight him off. It nearly worked too. I was so close to escaping his grasp, but it doesn’t work like that.

He will always be stronger than me.

I kept trying to fight him off, but each time my attempts got weaker. They got weaker until I stopped trying to fight him off. I didn’t bother trying to push him away anymore. It was useless.

I used to be so furious at myself for not being able to stop him. But then it dawned on me that I would never win. People like me weren’t born to win. We were born for one thing and one thing only. We never meant to be anything other than their slaves. All of us were merely toys that could be disposed of.

It was just how thing worked.

It was drilled in to my head the second I was old enough to understand. And I did understand. I completely understood. It didn’t mean I accepted it.

My name is Donghae. I’m going to be sixteen in October. Most people are excited about their sixteenth birthday. Not me. My sixteenth birthday is the most dreaded day of my life.

People like me, we all dreaded on sixteenth. There wasn’t one of us who didn’t. It wasn’t a day to celebrate. It was they day you were sold.

You had no idea who would buy you, and that was the worst thing. It could be anyone. You could be sold to someone who would kill you within days.

Most of us are broken. It’s rare to see anyone that still had life in their eyes, anyone that still clings on to hope like an idiot. I realised quickly that there is no hope for me. There’s no hope for anybody like me.

If I was one of them, I wouldn’t have a care in the world. I could be happy and have everything I ever wanted.

But I’m not. That’s what frustrates me. The fact that they have everything and the only thing anyone like me can look forwards to is a quick, painless death isn’t right. Just because we’re not as strong as them, because they’re more powerful, we have to live like this.

I still care. Oh God, of course I still care. I care so much it aches. But I can’t do anything. I’m powerless and useless against them. I have to sit back and watch as my life leads the path they’ve picked out for me, the same path that every pet has lived.

Pets. That’s what they call us. Because that was all we are really. Slaves or pets or toys. Our only use if for blood, , torture or housework.

My future isn’t bright. My future is a candle that has never been lit and never will be.