Chapter Ten

 

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 Kyuhyun walked out of his office and plopped down on his bench. He reclined against the wall and sighed.

 

“Kyu? What are you doing here outside?”

 

“Oh. Hi, hyung,” Kyuhyun greeted Hankyung, who took a seat next to him.

 

“Sohee-sshi didn’t come today? Did she inform you?”

 

Kyuhyun tipped his head and let out another long breath.

 

“Hyung, if she did inform me then I would’ve gone home already.”

 

“That’s true,” Hankyung replied. “Then why don’t you go home now? Or would you still wait for her?”

 

              Kyuhyun puffed up his cheeks as he thought. It really didn’t seem like Sohee would drop by that Tuesday afternoon. But what Kyuhyun expected was that, Sohee could’ve told him in advance or at least the Ahn couple could’ve left a message. Not that Kyuhyun was busy or anything. He just thought any notifications regarding his clients’ schedules would’ve been appropriate. That, and he didn’t feel like going home just yet.

 

“Ah, hyung.”

 

Hankyung looked up from his cup of water and turned to his dongsaeng.

 

“Yesterday… Did Eunhyuk—“

 

“The ‘oppa’ issue? You’re worried about that?” Hankyung interrupted as he grinned playfully.

 

“Yes because I don’t like maniacs touching or teasing my clients,” Kyuhyun said with little conviction. Hankyung had to chuckle.

 

“What, doesn’t Sohee-sshi call you ‘oppa’ as well? Or does she call you ‘songsaengnim’?”

 

             Kyuhyun opened his mouth but failed to reply as he remembered his sessions with Sohee. She never called me anything, really, Kyuhyun realized in his head but he couldn’t really say that to Hankyung, who was really fond of teasing him.

 

“Jealous?”

 

“No.”

 

“If you say so.”

 

Hankyung chugged the remaining water in his cup before he stood up to stretch his legs.

 

“Why don’t you take a stroll around your neighborhood? Or visit a park? So you wouldn’t laze around at home,” Hankyung suggested.

 

              Kyuhyun gave it some thought. It wasn’t a bad idea at all. There was nothing to do at home and it had been awhile since Kyuhyun walked around his neighborhood for fun.

 

“I guess I’ll go,” Kyuhyun said. “And if you see Eunhyuk, tell him to keep his ‘oppa’ jokes to himself.”

 

Hankyung acknowledged the request – it was more of a command actually – with a salute.

 

“Will do.”

 

             With that, Kyuhyun left to go to the carpark, just a level below the offices’ floor. He hung his faded beige cardigan over his shoulder as he walked to number 18, where a gray Hyundai Sonata was parked. It was in great condition that when anyone saw it, they’d instinctively think the owner was as great as his car. But Kyuhyun never admitted it – that his car was only in such a condition because Ahra and Mrs. Cho kept bugging him to take good care of it since, well, the car was a graduation gift from Mr. Cho’s relatives. Kyuhyun was thankful, very, but he didn’t imagine almost half of his savings would be spent on the vehicle’s necessities. Then again, if he didn’t sacrifice a bit of money, the car’s luxurious features would have gone to waste. Besides, Kyuhyun was the only one who’d use it. Only the best for the best, Kyuhyun would always think whenever he got lazy to bring the car to the shop for its monthly check-up. The Sonata, though, Kyuhyun refused to call his ‘baby’. Why? That was because, from a long time ago, there already was a person whom Kyuhyun had given the title ‘baby’ to…

 

“Baby? What a nice word. I like it!”

 

The engine started up as Kyuhyun glanced at the rearview mirror. His eyes softened , a forgotten tingle throbbing in his chest.

 

“Time to go back.”

 

~*~

 

              The road was empty, ridded of the cars that were usually parked at the sides. There were no kids skipping about or ladies chatting by a house’s gates. The sky was painted orange as the sun prepared to leave and the shadows of houses decorated the asphalt Kyuhyun trudged on. Summer dusks were always so lonesome now that Kyuhyun remembered, passing by an abandoned playground a few blocks away from home. The trees rocked to the lullabies of the winds, leaves flapping noisily on willow branches. The eerie screeches of the swings spread throughout the area and Kyuhyun swore he heard children laughing when a breeze blew past him. He walked some more, heading west where the lamp posts lit up one by one. There was an old cathedral somewhere along that path. Kyuhyun could vaguely recall Sunday mornings in winter back in elementary school. Ahra and Kyuhyun participated in Church work. They were most of the times singing along with the choir. During other Sundays, Ahra would play her violin to accompany Kyuhyun as he sang. Back in those days, Kyuhyun wasn’t much of a troublemaker. As long as it was about church duty, Kyuhyun tried his best not to goof off like he usually did, no matter how diligent and smart he was as a student. He loved winter Sundays at the cathedral because of simple things like the cold breeze and when it lingered around the candle rooms or the freshly baked snacks the people handed to the choir members during breaks or even how Ahra would scold him because he often wore less, forgetting to wear a scarf or bringing an extra jacket in case it snowed later those days. Recently though, winter Sundays didn’t feel the same anymore.

 

“A wedding?” Kyuhyun mumbled to himself as he stood outside the now aged cathedral.

 

            Men in formal wear were taking down colorful banners that hung just beside the entrance. Some were carrying dozens of bouquets of flowers, others were sweeping the petals that fell and collected on the ground. It seemed like an extravagant wedding with all the people bustling about, cleaning up the whole place. Kyuhyun felt conscious suddenly, watching all those men in suits with only his jogging pants and green, sweat-soaked shirt on. Oh but the feeling disappeared a moment later, having realized that it wasn’t a crime to wear such an attire to stroll around the neighborhood. It was normal after all.

 

“I wonder who got married,” Kyuhyun thought aloud as he dug his hands deep in his pockets. “Whoever they are, I wish them the best.”

 

             The way back was, as usual, long and lonesome. Evening arrived but the neighborhood was as dead as ever. The lights from houses rejoiced with the street lights and helped Kyuhyun with his journey home and hopefully he’d be eating dinner in a few minutes. While observing the road that stretched before him, Kyuhyun’s mind kept going back to the cathedral.

 

“Have you ever thought of getting married?”

 

“Hm. Not really. Why?”

 

“No reason. Do you think you’d like it?”

 

“If I say ‘yes’, would you want me to propose to you someday?”

 

“What? To me? Are you sure?”

 

“Yeah. Why not?”

 

“You’re crazy. Isn’t it too early?”

 

“That’s why I’m asking you now if you’d want me to so that I’d know what to do next ‘someday’.”

 

“You’re really crazy.”

 

“Or would you rather that ‘someday’ be now? We can go buy rings after school.”

 

“Then we’d ask the vendor to be the priest and we’d get married at the side of the road?”

 

“No way. There’s this cathedral near my place. I want to show you.”

 

“The one you used to go to when you were a kid?”

 

“Yeah. I still go there, you know.”

 

“Of course.”

 

“So? Do you want to go there with me?”

 

Her lips curved into the most beautiful smile Kyuhyun had ever seen in his whole life.

 

“I do.”

 

The door opened and revealed Mrs. Cho in her apron.

 

             “Omo! Kyu! You’re soaking wet!” she shouted in panic as her son stood before her, dazed. His hair stuck to his forehead and his clothes were dripping wet, soiling the new mat he stood on. “The rain must have been pouring.”

 

Kyuhyun looked up at Mrs. Cho then looked back down at his dirtied running shoes.

 

“Really? I didn’t notice.”

 

Kyuhyun removed his shoes before Mrs. Cho dragged him further inside and closed the door.

 

~*~

 

             The reception hall was utterly fabulous. The lighting, table cloths, chairs, the wine fountain in the middle of everything else – amazing. It had been exactly three hours since the wedding ended and everyone was all in for the merriment.

 

             Hair let down and curled at the ends, a pretty flower headband as an accentuation and with a simple mini white dress on and cream heels with tiny ribbons at the back, Sohee wandered through the hall. Zhou Mi was somewhere in the crowd, most probably conversing with the bride and groom, who were close friends of his. Sohee wasn’t planning on tagging along with her cousin but Victoria and Mrs. Ahn insisted. She wasn’t even sure if Mr. Ahn remembered to call her psychologist about the change in her schedule for the day. She would have done it herself but she left her two phones to her older sisters’ care and it had been weeks since the last time she held her gadgets. Plus, she didn’t know Kyuhyun’s number.

 

Sohee pressed her back against the wall, away from the party and sighed.

 

“Why are you sighing, Little Miss?”

 

Sohee pursed her lips.

 

“Why did you come along, Donghae oppa?”

 

The gentleman in a green polo shirt and jeans chuckled, mimicking Sohee’s stance against the wall.

 

“To prevent you from sighing,” Donghae said softly as he patted Sohee’s head. “Your Zhou Mi oppa invited me solely for that purpose.”

 

              “I’m sorry. This must have troubled you,” Sohee mumbled, looking down at her toes. Zhou Mi was fussing about that earlier, wanting to seriously doll up Sohee for that particular occasion. Hair, pedicure, manicure but Sohee refused to get her nails done. She sighed again.

 

              “Don’t look down. C’mon. And no sighing,” Donghae sort of scolded the tired girl but got ignored. His attention shifted to the crowd at the center. The music changed and on came a sweet piano melody. It looked like the guests were preparing to dance, making the imaginary light bulb above Donghae’s head ding.

 

“If you don’t try to enjoy this party, I’ll pull you over there for a dance.”

 

Donghae pointed toward the partnered-up guests who began to slowly sway to the symphony. Sohee frowned at the idea.

 

“I don’t want to dance.”

 

“Then no sighing. Your Zhou Mi oppa might scold me if he saw you putting on a sad face.”

 

              Sohee nodded and smiled just a little to reassure Donghae. He was looking from side to side, worried that Zhou Mi might catch him not doing his job. Ever since that day when Donghae helped Sohee get to Pink Panda, Zhou Mi and him had gotten closer. They were each other’s Chinese and Korean tutors.

 

              Sohee stared at the couples. She didn’t know even one person at that party, aside from Donghae and Zhou Mi of course. Noticing the anxious expression Sohee had on, Donghae reached out to hold her hand, feeling the girl jerk slightly at his action.

 

              “We’re not going to dance,” Donghae paused to offer Sohee a smile. “Your feet probably hurt from wearing those heels. There’s a vacant table over there. We’ll sit down. Okay?”

 

               Sohee didn’t have the chance to answer as Donghae deliberately pulled her to a table and pulled out the chair to make her sit down. It was those kinds of tables – the round ones specifically used for easy socialization at parties. It was decorated in pink fabric, white table linens placed neatly on dazzling Chinas, silver utensils positioned right beside the plates. A big glass vase was the table’s centerpiece and in it were white roses. The seat on Sohee’s left was unoccupied while Donghae sat to her right. She hoped Zhou Mi would take that seat so she wouldn’t have to worry about making small talks with a stranger. She felt really uncomfortable suddenly.

 

“Where’s Zhou Mi oppa?”

 

Donghae craned his neck to try and spot Zhou Mi somewhere but it was to no avail.

 

“There are too many guests. Why don’t you give him a call?” Donghae suggested as he folded his arms on the table.

 

“I don’t…”

 

“Where’s your phone? You didn’t bring it again?”

 

              Donghae glanced at Sohee. She had her head hanging low, most likely looking down at the expensive-looking China. An unanswered question came to mind as Donghae thought back to his and Sohee’s past adventure.

 

“Come to think of it, you never answered that question,” Donghae tilted his head as he looked at Sohee up close. “Why don’t you have a cell phone?”

 

               Donghae’s eyes were boring into Sohee’s now, the girl starting to fumble with her words. To Sohee, the answer was really top secret as it was rather important and personal. She had only told Victoria and Sunye about the matter, thus asking her two unnies to take her phones away and hide them somewhere she wouldn’t be able to get her hands on. The answer alone even made Sohee’s heart ache on account of the fact that it was part of a life she once had; a sad and painful past up to that moment she was still trying to forget.

 

Donghae held Sohee’s hand again. The girl’s face had gone pale and she kept stuttering, not even one word clear for Donghae to understand.

 

              “Are you okay? Sohee-sshi, I’m sorry. Drink water. Did I say something I shouldn’t have? I’m really sorry,” Donghae continuously apologized, panicked.

 

Sohee shook her head and held Donghae’s hand tighter for a comforting squeeze. She hated worrying people.

 

“Please don’t apologize. I’m sorry. I… I’m just a bit tired.”

 

Donghae closed his eyes and sighed. He took out his phone from his pocket and speed-dialed Zhou Mi.

 

“There’s no signal here,” Donghae whispered. “I’ll find your Zhou Mi oppa and tell him I’ll take you home so you could rest. Stay here.”

 

              Then the next thing Sohee saw was Donghae’s figure going through the crowd of guests and finally vanishing from her sight. The fragments of that Friday afternoon in Hongdae popped into her head one by one. Donghae had been kind to her from the start and she felt bad for ever bothering the gentleman with trivial things.

 

“Excuse me. Do you mind if I take this seat next to you?” a young man asked right after tapping Sohee on her shoulder and getting her attention.

 

              He wore a classic green coat over a black button-down and slacks. A yellow flower broach was pinned on the left side of the coat and it fascinated Sohee. He seemed like Sohee’s age or about two or three years older. His hair was cut to perfection, short and swept to the side. He was charming, his prominent jaw structure making him stand out from the other guys there. Politely, Sohee bowed her head as a gesture for the boy to take the seat and soon, he sat down. Sohee took the cloth on her plate and left it on Donghae’s chair so that no one would occupy it. The other guests began to sit down as well but there were no signs of Zhou Mi and Donghae. She took a sip off her champagne glass to calm herself down. Water had never tasted so different before.

 

“I’m Kim Jonghyun by the way,” the boy spoke up after seeing Sohee drink until the water reached half level of the glass in one go.

 

“Ahn Sohee.”

 

“Are you waiting for someone?” Jonghyun started. “You keep looking around.”

 

             Sohee dodged the question with a smile and it did the trick to keep Jonghyun quiet until waiters began to serve the appetizers at each table. Sohee took one tiny lemon square – or at least it looked like one – and nibbled on it passively. Jonghyun continued to watch her through his peripheral vision because he didn’t want to look that obvious. Sohee began to relax as the main course arrived. She had given up on waiting for her cousin and that silly fellow.

 

They must be eating at another table by now, Sohee thought to herself.

 

She ate very little, appetite nonexistent. She felt like sleeping as she waited for the desserts.

 

“You’re fast.”

 

Sohee giggled inwardly.

 

“I’m not hungry.”

 

Jonghyun put the fork down and turned to Sohee.

 

“Do I make you conscious? I’m sorry.”

 

Sohee was drinking at the time and she choked, coughing as Jonghyun hesitated to pat her back.

 

“Not really so don’t apologize.”

 

“Oh,” Jonghyun chuckled. “Then you probably aren’t good at parties?”

 

              Sohee chose her words carefully, fearing that Jonghyun might say something along the lines, “Ah. You’re very weird” or “Let’s continue in silence”.  But Jonghyun didn’t look the type to be rude. He was quite friendly actually because otherwise, Sohee wouldn’t be able to talk normally with him.

 

“I’m not but my cousin made me come here with him and turning down an older person’s offer is rude,” Sohee said. “So here I am.”

 

“So I was right,” Jonghyun retorted with a grin. “You’re the shy type.”

 

              Sohee returned the victorious grin Jonghyun had with a slight nod. She had no more words in stored for the conversation. The desserts came a minute later as waiters set a piece of Black Forest cake on each guest’s plates. Sohee reluctantly dug in, having realized that her stomach had no space for any more food. She left at least one-fourth of the cake as she went back to hoping for either Zhou Mi’s or Donghae‘s return. She highly doubted that Jonghyun would strike up another chat with her.

 

             “I’m used to going to parties and people think I’m quite a host even when I’m only turning a senior in high school next semester,” Jonghyun said as he wiped his hand with a napkin. “But I don’t like parties that much. I’m like you.”

 

Sohee clasped her hands over her lap and pouted down at them.

 

“But unlike me, you’re comfortable with these kinds of things.”

 

Jonghyun laughed.

 

“Can I be honest with you?” Jonghyun asked but Sohee stared blankly at him. “You attract a lot of attention. You’re very pretty.”

 

              Sohee diverted her eyes away from Jonghyun and blushed lightly. It was one of those moments when strangers complimented her and she would think it was absurd.

 

“Th-thank you…”

 

             “Please don’t think I’m trying to flatter you because I’m hitting on you,” Jonghyun put it bluntly. “I said that because it’s true. I already noticed you at the cathedral. You were with a guy though. Was that your cousin?”

 

             Sohee thought back to a few hours ago when Donghae kept her company as soon as they sat down on a pew and Zhou Mi scurried off to meet a few friends. Zhou Mi was popular. Period.

 

“No. That was a friend of mine.”

 

“Boyfriend?”

 

“That’s—“

 

“Sorry. That was rude of me,” Jonghyun blurted out. “Now it sounds like I’m really hitting on you.”

 

             “Ah. Yeah. That would be impossible.” Sohee laughed nervously, waving her hand frantically. But to this reaction, Jonghyun smirked and Sohee swore there was a dangerous glint in his eyes. He leaned in toward her ear and slowly whispered:

 

“Do you know that feeling when you see someone for the first time and you tell yourself that you really like that person?”

 

Sohee gulped as a response.

 

             “I had that feeling when I saw you. It’s called ‘infatuation’,” Jonghyun pulled away for a chuckle. “So you don’t have to worry about whether I’m hitting on you or not. It’s simple.”

 

             Sohee crinkled her nose out of habit. She did this whenever she got tired of smiling. It had the same effect as a smile had as Jonghyun smiled at her. That was the end of their chat as girls started pulling Jonghyun for a dance. The pushiness the girls displayed reminded Sohee of a high school prom in one of the episodes of an American drama she used to watch. The guys were the pushy ones though, not the girls. But every time Jonghyun finished dancing, he’d always return to Sohee’s side and smile at her, as if he had taken over Donghae’s job. When the party ended, Sohee remained in her seat, certain that her cousin would come and get her after he gave the newly married couple his regards. Unexpectedly, Jonghyun stayed behind with her.

 

Jonghyun put up two fingers and showed them to Sohee.

 

“Confession number two,” he announced. “But don’t be surprised.”

 

              Somehow, at those words, Sohee’s heart clamped up in a tightening pain. She had a familiar sensation from a long time ago yet it had been so long she had forgotten from which memory the sensation belonged to. I wonder…

 

Jonghyun’s charming smile abruptly turned into an evil smirk which Sohee found hard to believe.

 

             “I think people are better off staring at you, admiring you silently from afar compared to getting to really know you. You give off that air,” he said without hesitation. “But I still appreciate your few words earlier. Infatuation toward a cute girl helps in a conversation. Bye then.”

 

             Jonghyun walked out on Sohee just like that and the mysterious fellow disappeared completely. Such honestly-put words etched in Sohee’s mind and Jonghyun’s voice resounded in her ears like a never-ending recording. Her heart – it was like someone had taken hold of it, squeezing it until it exploded into billions of bits. Another memory flashed in her mind, a voice speaking louder than Jonghyun’s…

 

“I don’t want to leave you… Yet.”

 

Sohee shut her eyes. Not again…

 

“Sohee-ah? Did you fall asleep?”

 

              Zhou Mi pinched his cousin’s ear and the girl’s eyes shot open. She turned toward Zhou Mi and she felt relieved; so much so that it overwhelmed her greatly, enough to make her cry and bawl. But she held it in.

 

             “Did you eat lots? Donghae-sshi got caught up with my friends so he couldn’t get back to you,” Zhou Mi said as he helped Sohee up. In his hand, Sohee’s own was freezing but the happy girl looked up at him with a genuine smile.

 

“I did but I couldn’t finish my cake so…”

 

             “That’s fine. As long as you ate and made it out of a conversation with a stranger in one piece then you did well,” Zhou Mi joked at the last part and it made Sohee laugh.

 

From behind Sohee, the bride and groom waved at Zhou Mi and the tall gentleman let go of Sohee’s hand.

 

“I’ll be right back. Wait for Donghae here, okay?”

 

              As Zhou Mi jogged to where the couple was, Donghae walked up to Sohee, hands deep in his pockets. He paused a fair distance away and bowed at a perfect 90 ° angle. Sohee backed up in shock.

 

“I’m very sorry! Very sorry!”

 

“Uh… Oppa it’s—“

 

Donghae gripped Sohee’s wrist as soon as he returned to standing straight, pulling her closer to him gently.

 

“I’m really… Sorry.”

 

              Sohee inhaled and held her breath for a good 10-second pause before letting it all out. Donghae’s eyes were so sincere that if Sohee looked into them any longer, she would have really broken down.

 

“Stop it. Were you worried about me that much? I-I can handle myself just fine.”

 

              Sohee pouted and shook Donghae’s hand away. She was about to walk away until her ankle weakened and she lost balance. Donghae caught her as she fell backwards, back now pressed against her concerned companion’s chest. She was shaking.

 

“From another table, I stared at you to make sure you were okay yet I began gritting my teeth and I got annoyed at myself.”

 

“What are you—“

 

              Then Donghae twirled Sohee around, the action making Sohee’s legs give in due to the pressure and soon enough, she was enveloped by strong arms. And the words that came after, unknowingly, made forgotten tears well out from sad eyes and they stained the patch of green on Donghae’s sleeve as Sohee couldn’t do anything but to hide her embarrassed face against his shoulder.

 

“You looked so lonely.”

 

~*~

 

              Zhou Mi drove Sohee back in his Kia Rio. Donghae rode the bus, explaining that getting in to such a fancy car made him feel like a burden. Sohee slept throughout the whole trip, her sleeping face giving Zhou Mi a somewhat guilty feeling for even dragging her out of the house even when he knew his cousin was a tad bit timid. But he wasn’t entirely guilty since he did that out of concern because he wanted Sohee to interact with people more. He knew Sohee was a friendly girl, she really was, just a bit queer whenever she tried taking the initiative to talk to a stranger. Zhou Mi always found it adorable whenever he witnessed such a moment, Sohee attempting to be a lively conversationalist and whatnot. She made friends that way even when she was only forcing herself to smile or laugh. She had a bad experience about being alone back when she was in elementary school. Zhou Mi rather not recall such a traumatizing event, now carrying Sohee in his arms and walking to the front door of the Ahn residence. It was past 6:30 and it was drizzling.

 

             “Zhou Mi oppa,” Sunye welcomed her cousin who entered the living room with her unconscious dongsaeng still in his arms. He laid Sohee on the couch then pounded on his shoulder. Sohee was quite heavy. Victoria came into the scene with a glass of water for Sohee but she gave it to Zhou Mi instead.

 

“How did it go?” Victoria asked Zhou Mi as she squatted next to Sohee, poking at her cheek.

 

“I guess it went well.”

 

“You guess?” Sunye interjected.

 

Zhou Mi swallowed the lump in his throat.

 

“I was all around the place because the bride and groom kept introducing me to their relatives—“

 

“You left her alone?!” Victoria and Sunye turned to Zhou Mi almost at the same time. Their eyes grew big in shock and Zhou Mi bit his tongue, terrified.

 

“No! Donghae-sshi kept her company. I invited him specifically for that reason,” Zhou Mi answered.

 

             Victoria and Sunye regained their composure and sighed. They knew Donghae from Sohee’s stories and heard him over the phone a few times because Zhou Mi often called the man for Korean-Chinese lessons. The two unnies didn’t feel that comfortable with a man they hadn’t met before - no matter how many times Sohee said he was nice - hanging around their baby sister. They were rather possessive unnies.

 

“Please be more careful of our dongsaeng, Zhou Mi oppa,” Sunye said as she folded her arms over her chest.

 

              “I don’t trust this Donghae person,” Victoria shared with an upset tone to her voice. “Sohee-ah’s pretty, we know, and we are most aware of how she is with men. Right?”

 

“She turns ahjusshis into pedos?” Sunye revealed.

 

“Ah! !” Zhou Mi clapped his hands.

 

The three of them laughed, oblivious to the fact that Sohee had already woken up and her eyes were slanted with a vicious glow to them.

 

“What are you guys talking about? Hm?”

 

The three froze.

 

“Well?”

 

“Tell auntie and uncle ‘thank you’ for me! G’night!” Zhou Mi shouted as he ran out the door.

 

Victoria escaped to the dining room, giggling wildly as she did so. Sunye and Sohee looked at each other with tired smiles.

 

“Was it fun? Did you enjoy the party?”

 

Sohee immediately nodded.

 

“Yeah. The food was great too but I couldn’t finish the Black Forest piece.”

 

              Sunye’s stomach grumbled at the mention of Black Forest. They haven’t had dinner yet because the Ahn family had a policy about eating only when everyone in the family, if all of the members were present in the house, were all gathered around the dining table. If one person was out, he or she must call to inform the rest whether he or she would be eating out or not so that dinner wouldn’t be held back without notice.

 

              “I’m so hungry~” Sunye playfully whined. “If you’re full and want to sleep more, go back to your room. Mom would scold you again if she sees you out cold here.”

 

               Sohee combed her hair back and proceeded to her room upstairs. She stripped down to her underwear and collapsed on her bed, wrapping the blankets around her for warmth since the AC sputtered freezing air.

 

“I think people are better off staring at you, admiring you silently from afar…”

 

              With Jonghyun’s words spinning around her head, Sohee eventually drifted off to sleep. If she were to have a peaceful dream or a chaotic nightmare, it did not bother her. She just hoped she could forget it the next time she wakes up. And along with that dream or nightmare, Sohee hoped the painful memories would be forced out of her brain as well. Even if she knew it was impossible.