Dear J.!

I’ve never written a letter to a person whose name would begin with ‘J.’, so I can’t write this letter too prettily. Guess I’ll have to work on calligraphy.
Well, since we’re about to meet in about six hours, I’ll make it quick. I got this crazy idea, why don’t we exchange letters? You said that you love writing them but have no one to write to. So, how about me?
Don’t feel bound or anything, I know it’s a silly idea, but I wanted to give it a try.
Here goes my letter. Better beware, my letters are always ridiculously random. And, since we’re going to meet anyways, I don’t know what to write. I mean, if there's something I can write and tell you in person.
See? Already some ten sentences with NO MEANING.
Ah, I feel sorry for my friends who get letters from me. They surely get annoyed by those stupid, long, pointless messages.
So. What should I say.
Oh, I know- write more songs, boy! The ones you’ve sent me are incredible, I have no idea why you decided not to compose anymore. You not only have a beautiful voice, you also write amazing lyrics that I can relate to. I can relate so much it kind of scares me sometimes.
And I’m not writing this because I want to be nice. If that was the case, if I wanted to be nice, I’d only comment on your songs that one time and then not mention them anymore. Yet you got me so intrigued, so hooked, that I can’t help but come back to those songs and those stories you sang.
Okay, maybe that’ll be enough for now? I gotta dress up and head to university in some half an hour. See you later!


K.



Jonghyun reads the letter three days after receiving it. Kibum surprised him, he surprised him more than anyone in last few years. His life has been stable, dull, unchanging, a normal routine. He tried to change it, he’d meet up with many people from the Internet, but those contacts never lasted. Either those people would get bored with him or he would become too afraid of opening up to someone. Yet, (almost) no one’s ever sacrificed so much time and attention for him. For the first time in a long time he felt special. Unique.
And lost. Absolutely lost.




The first time when Jonghyun stops replying him makes Kibum go crazy with anxiety. Sure, it’s been only three days since the last text message, but it’s been long enough.
Does he not want to know me anymore? Does he think I’m too young for him? He is seven years older than me after all (he found out during their third meeting. He’s only begun studying at university and that’s how he presents his age to Jonghyun- I’m a freshman. It sounds way better than ‘I’m twenty’.). Or maybe something happened to him? What’s wrong? Why am I suddenly so ridiculously anxious?!
Days go by and there’s still no reply from Jonghyun. Kibum can’t stand it anymore, he writes him an email, inviting him for a coffe and to watch some movie.
When another week passes by in silence, Kibum doesn’t know what to do with himself.
He doesn’t want to sound desperate, doesn’t want to obtrude, he knows Jonghyun has his own life, but he can’t stand the thought of losing him.




Their teacher says something about Swedish adjectives and how they collocate with nouns, while Kibum continues staring at his mobile phone. There’s a girl looking like James Dean on his wallpaper, he’s been head over heels for this photo. It’s inspired him to write some short stories and it still is a fresh source of ideas.
Junho elbows him, as the teacher tells Kibum to do the next exercise. Luckily, adjectives are something Kibum’s never had problems with, even when it came to irregular Swedish ones, so he answers mechanically, his thoughts still focused on the text message that doesn’t arrive.
“You’re not here, are you?” Junho whispers, as the teacher’s attention focuses on Chansung, who’s sitting on the other end of the classroom. Kibum only shrugs because it’s true. He’s not here, he’s somewhere there, somewhere he can think of the subjects he wants to talk about with Jonghyun, somewhere he can fantasize about getting physically close to him. Somewhere Jonghyun longs for him too.
“Buddy. You look like you need some strong coffee.”
That Kibum indeed needed, but he promised himself not to drink too much coffee. He’s been a coffee addict since the beginning of high school. He’d drink coffee everyday, always trying out new types of it, always making himself new lattes, cappuccinos, frappuccinos and so on. He’d drink it with honey, caramel, almonds, coco, brandy, anything that came to his mind.
Now though he doesn’t feel like drinking coffee. Why should he drink it if it won’t make him feel any better. He doesn’t need coffee. He needs a very certain man to text him, give him a sign of life. Everything else is unimportant.
He can’t stand it anymore. He sends a short text message.

Hey, I sent you an email, wonder if you read it. :)

There it is. Sent.
He doesn’t wait for an answer, he focuses on the lesson. He’s done all he could, now it’s all up to Jonghyun.


It’s already the end of their English lesson when his phone vibrates in his pocket.

I did.


Kibum feels like throwing the phone out of the window and then breaking into Jonghyun’s apartment to tell him how much he hates him for behaving like that and yet how much he misses him.
He excuses himself, leaves the classroom, goes to the coffee machine, chooses cappuccino with the biggest amount of sugar that is available, and bolts it down.
After return to the classroom he doesn’t think about some stupid, unreliable, antisocial Jonghyun from the Internet he’s seen four times in his life.
(four times too often)




A/N: Chapter 2, as promised! The next one should be up tomorrow!
I needed to distract myself from descriptive grammar of Swedish, so. Hope you'll like it! And jsyk, there's going to be some serious drama in it. Like, I'm warning you. I love drama, so. x"D



'k, gotta go and continue learning. Anyone knows JongKey fics in Swedish? Or, idk, Swedish scanlation groups? *wishful thinking* Because I REALLY need some motivation to learn it and I've only found about three HP fics in Swedish... /le sigh

Oh, and that's Kibum's (and my) wallpaper: