Himchan shifted the bags in his arms and rapped on the door with his free hand.  He wasn’t surprised when there was no reply, so he tried a little more forcefully this time.  “YAH!  YOO YOUNGJAE! I know you’re in there.  You better open this door.  I will sit here and beat on it until you do!”

                It took a few minutes, several neighbors shouting and a few threats of bodily harm, but eventually Himchan heard the click of the lock and the door opened a few inches.  A set of red eyes glared through the crack at him, but Himchan didn’t care.  He forced the door open with a push that sent Youngjae stumbling backwards, and entered the dark and messy apartment.

                “Jesus,” Himchan cursed with a crinkled nose as he surveyed his surroundings.  “When was the last time you cleaned this place?  Or at least opened a window?”

                “What do you want, Himchan?” Youngjae grumbled.  He didn’t have the energy to entertain the over dramatic actor at the moment.

                Himchan looked back and inspected the boy.  His hair and clothes were a rumbled mess, though it was hard to see since he was wrapped in a blanket cocoon.  His eyes were bloodshot with bags underneath as if he had spent the last few nights crying instead of sleeping, which was exactly what Himchan figured had happened. 

                “I brought these.”  He shoved the overflowing bags of snacks and drinks into Youngjae’s chest.  “Serve me something.”

                Youngjae barely managed to grab hold of the bags through his cocoon as Himchan left to flop down on the couch.  Youngjae set the bags on down on the table and took out a can of soda and a bag of chips and tossed them onto Himchan’s lap before flopping down on the other side.  “Seriously, what are you doing here?”

                “I head you haven’t been to work in a week and nobody’s been able to get a hold of you.”

                “Yongguk’s still acting as the go-between messenger boy, I take it?”

                “Yeah, Daehyun told him that.  Bang also said that Daehyun seemed torn up about it.”

                Youngjae scoffed and rolled his eyes before snuggling deeper into his cocoon.  “What does he care?  Shouldn’t he be happy that I’m not there to make him miserable?”

                “I’m guessing it didn’t go well that night…”  Himchan tapered off as Youngjae sent him a death glare.  “Come on, at least let me know what happened.”

                Youngjae contemplated just kicking the elder out, but figured that after all the effort Himchan had made, he had a right to know.

                Himchan winced as Youngjae reached the end of his narrative.  While the initial part of his plan had indeed been a success, he certainly hadn’t expected that sort of backlash.

                “I’m sorry, Youngjae.  I didn’t know that would happen.”

                “It’s fine, I don’t blame you.”

                “But what are you going to do?  You’re going to have to face him eventually.  You can’t stay locked in here forever.”

                Youngjae shook his head as he sank deeper into the couch.  “I have enough savings put away to pay off this place for however long it takes me to wither and die.”

                Himchan gave an exasperated sigh.  “You can’t do that.”

                “What’s the point?” Youngjae choked, fighting back tears.  “I ruined everything, Daehyun hates me and I’m apparently a horrible person who does nothing but bring misery and despair to everyone I meet.  It’s best for everyone if I never go out again and just die alone.”  Youngjae felt an onslaught of sobs rising, something he was used to by now, but they were knocked back by a sharp whack to his head.

                “Get over it,” Himchan snapped as he lowered his hand.  “I’ll admit that our first plan didn’t go quite the way we wanted.   But that doesn’t mean that you give up.  You just have to try something else.”  Himchan tried to make eye contact with the brunette actor to see if his words had any effect, but Youngjae just sank farther into himself, cowering away.  Himchan scoffed, making to stand.  “You know… if you’re really this whiny and weak then maybe I was wrong for ever considering you a rival.”  Himchan started toward the door but Youngjae’s voice called him back.

                “Wait!  What do you have in mind?”

                Himchan gave himself a mental high five for his success and went back to the couch.  “We’ll have to try a new plan.”

                “Enough with your plans,” Youngjae groaned, flopping back against the arm of the couch.  “I don’t need him taking a restraining order out on me.”

                “It’s not like that,” Himchan spat back.  “This one will be different.  You said that he said that he can’t be with you because you’re a bad person?  You’re too evil and selfish and full of yourself?”

                “You’re adding in your own insults now,” Youngjae growled, but Himchan paid him no mind.

                “We’ll just have to show him a different side of you.  We’ll show him that you can be nice too.  It may be the biggest acting job you’ll ever accomplish, but by the time we’re done, he won’t have any excuses not to like you.  Last time it was ‘Project: Get into Daehyun’s Pants’.  This time it’ll be ‘Project: Win Daehyun’s Heart Through Good Deeds’.  It’s fail proof.”

                “I dunno… that seems like a lot of work…” Youngjae whined.  “What do I have to do?”

                “I’ll have to think about it,” Himchan said as he started to ponder the possibilities.  “I’ve never tried being a nice person before.  This’ll take some research.”

                Daehyun gripped the glass tightly in his hand.  He was worried that it might crack, but a bigger part of him was worried that he’d lash out if he didn’t anchor himself with something.

                “I’m really, really sorry.  I should never have let them do it.  I shouldn’t have helped them.”  Yongguk sat across the table, trying to make eye contact with his friend as he apologized, but Daehyun’s gazed was fixated on the glass in his hand.

                “I thought we were friends…” Daehyun finally spoke up, his voice tense.  “Why would you betray me like that?  You really set that whole thing up just to get me to sleep with Youngjae?  What were you thinking?!”

                “I wasn’t, really,” Yongguk admitted guiltily.  “I did it mostly because Himchan told me to but also because I want to see you happy.”

                “And you thought me drunkenly hooking up with my client would make me happy?”

                “Well, I know you’ve been struggling with your feelings for him.  I thought maybe letting you express those feelings would help you resolve them.”

                “I’ve been struggling with those feelings for a reason, Yongguk.  And this just made everything worse,” Daehyun snapped back.

                Yongguk let out a sigh.  He could see that, more than anger and betrayal, his friend was struggling with his mixed feelings.  Daehyun just refused to see that himself.  “I know it’s been hard on you, but I think it’s time for you to start moving on.  Is that your only objection to Youngjae?”

                “I don’t know,” Daehyun sighed, dropping his head down on the table.

                “It’s different this time, you know-“ Yongguk started, but Daehyun cut him off.

                “Please, I really do not want to talk about it.”

                “I got it, I got it,” Yongguk gave up.  “But please don’t be mad at me for too long.  I’m really, really sorry.”

                Daehyun lifted and finally looked his companion in the eye.  The man was attempting a horrendously executed aegyo with puffed cheeks and puppy dog eyes.  It was enough to make any grown man hurl, but Daehyun just couldn’t find it in himself to stay mad anymore.  The sight of something so hideous had seriously thrown off his angry vibe.   “I forgive you already.  If I didn’t have you I’d have blown my head off long before now.”

                Yongguk smiled at his victory and raised his glass to clink against Daehyun’s.  “Then let’s drink.”

                Youngjae took deep breaths as he faced the front doors of B.A.P Entertainment.  He was nervous, to say the least.  He didn’t want to have to face the President or the hordes of other people who would ask him where he disappeared off to.  Though first and foremost, he didn’t want to face Daehyun.  He had been rejected and humiliated for the first time in a long time and he wasn’t ready to deal with that aftermath.  But his arms were sore from the boxes of cream filled donuts he was carrying and he knew that he was never going to be ready, so he might as well just it up and get it over with.  He gave himself one last motivational speech before he plastered a smile on his face and walked through the glass doors.

                “GOOD MORNING!  HOW ARE YOU?” He greeted an office girl as she headed his way.  She stared at him, wide eyed, only managing the shallowest of bows before she tried to scamper away.  Youngjae wouldn’t have it, though- he needed to fulfill being a nice person.  He blocked her path, still grinning widely, but this just scared her even more and she tried to maneuver around him.  Finally he managed to back her into a corner and keep her trapped.

                “I’m so sorry, Mr. Yoo!” she cried, covering her face with her arms.  “Whatever I did, I’m sorry.  Just please don’t hurt me!”

                “I’m not mad,” he tried to assure her, but she didn’t seem to be buying it.  “Here, eat a donut.”  He opened the top box and held it out to her.  She lowered her arms and gave the donuts a glance, but then shook her head.

                “N-no thank you, I’m alright.  Now if you’ll just excuse me-“

                “I SAID ‘EAT A DONUT’!” The girl whimpered but grabbed one quickly.  “Have a nice day!” Youngjae smiled at her again before closing the box and walking off.

                “Ugh, this is going to be hard.  People are so stubborn and unfriendly,” he grumbled to himself, heading up to his floor. 

                He reached the floor and stepped out of the elevator.  He really just wanted to go to his dressing room and hide, but he knew better.  He turned left instead and went to the meeting room where he knew everyone would be at this time.  Sure enough, when he opened the door, the entire staff, Daehyun included, stopped their discussion to stare at him in surprise.

                “GOOD MORNING!  HOW ARE YOU?” He recited again, just like he and Himchan had practiced.

                “Youngjae, glad to finally see you,” an upper executive greeted.  “Where have you been?”

                “Sorry for my absence.  Here, have some donuts.”  It took all the inner strength he had, but he plastered on a wide, fake smile and put the boxes of donuts down on the table.  Everyone continued to stare at him in silence, apparently dumbfounded and slightly disturbed, but he just gestured to the donuts again.  “Have.Some.Donuts,” he tried again through gritted his teeth.  Seriously, why was no one listening to him today?

                Everyone looked at each other, as if unsure of what to do, but finally Daehyun broke the ice and reached over to grab a donut first.  Slowly everyone followed his lead until they were all holding a cream filled pastry.  Even though Youngjae didn’t want to look at or acknowledge his manager’s existence, he was at least glad that everyone had now accepted his token of generosity.  The staff all timidly ate their donuts, shooting looks between Youngjae and each other as the room was filled in an uncomfortable silence.

                “So… what were we talking about?” Youngjae spoke up again.

                “Well, we were talking about what to do with filming schedules since you weren’t here last week.  We just need to finish revising some things and then Daehyun will come and brief you on it.  Why don’t you wait in your dressing room?” The executive suggested.  Youngjae gave a nod, knowing that he didn’t have a choice and backed out of the room.

                Waiting felt like torture.  He absolutely, positively did not want Daehyun to walk through that door, but at the same time it felt like maybe waiting for it was worse than him actually being here.  At least then he’d be that much closer to him leaving again.  Youngjae felt his palms getting sweaty from nerves as he tried to look through his fan letters and gifts, but he couldn’t keep his mind focused on anything.  All too soon, and yet not soon enough, there was a rapping on his door and it slowly creaked open.

               “Hey, Youngjae, mind if I come in?” Daehyun poked his head in.  Youngjae sat up, wiping his wet hands on his pants, and tried to look completely nonchalant. 

                “Yeah, you have my schedule?”  He asked, praying that his voice wouldn’t crack.

                “Look, before that, we should really talk about that night,” Daehyun said as he closed the door behind him and made his way to sit across from Youngjae in the make-up chair. 

                “I don’t know what night you’re talking about,” Youngjae cut in with a shake of his head.

                “Youngjae, come on.  We need to be mature about this.  Some things happened and-“

                “So, what’s my schedule this week?” Youngjae jumped in, voice a little too loud and cracking at the top.  He reached over to grab the clipboard off of Daehyun’s lap and busied himself looking over it.

                “Youngjae-“ But a loud rumble interrupted him and Daehyun doubled over, clutching his stomach.

                “Are you alright?” Youngjae asked, forgetting his anxiety in a moment of concern.

                “I just need to use your bathroom,” Daehyun forced out through gritted teeth.  He stood, though still hunched over, and struggled toward Youngjae’s private restroom.  Just has he disappeared inside and closed the door, Youngjae’s dressing room door slammed open.  Another member of the staff stood there, hands clutched on his stomach and face looking pained and pale.

                “Excuse me, Mr. Yoo, but may I use your bathroom?  All of the other ones are already full.”

                “Daehyun’s in there…What’s wrong?”

                “Everybody’s feeling really sick all of a sudden…”

                “YOO YOUNGJAE!”  Youngjae cringed as he heard the president shouting his name and footsteps banging down the hall, coming closer and closer.  Soon the president was in his door with a dark glare.  “Where in the hell did you get those donuts?!”

                “I-I dunno… the shop around the corner…”

                “You mean the one that’s already been audited three times for health code violations?!”

                “I don’t know!  I’ve never been there!  It was just the cheapest one!”

                “You disappear for a week and now you’re trying to poison everyone?!  What the hell is wrong with you?”

                “I-I-“ but just then Daehyun came out of the bathroom, still looking pale but less pained.  The president quickly dashed across the room and jumped in, much to the dismay of the violently ill staff member who had no choice but to crawl away.

                “Youngjae, where are you going?” Daehyun asked when Youngjae grabbed his bag and started toward the door.

                “HOME!”

                Operation Nice Guy Day 1 had not been a success.  If anything it had made his situation worse, but after talking to Himchan they had devised a new plan.  This one was seemingly infallible and much more impressive than donuts.  It was a bit more work, but if he just managed to talk the president into it, then he’d be set.

                “I want to sponsor a charity,” Youngjae announced as he traipsed into the president’s office unannounced.  Normally this would earn him a scolding, but considering that the company had been begging Youngjae to further his image by doing charity work for ages just to be viciously turned down, he could only look at the actor in surprise.

                “O-ok.  What did you have in mind?”

                “Get me something with animals.  Something fluffy.  Rabbits will do it.”  Before the President could completely process Youngjae’s sudden request, the actor had his heel and was out the door.

                “Youngjae?” Youngjae stiffened when he heard his name being called and quickly shoved the rabbit he had been cuddling in between the couch arm and cushion and picked up his iPad instead, busying himself.  Daehyun walked in at the actor’s answer and braced himself.  As much as he had been dreading it, they really needed to talk.  He had meant to do it the Monday after the party, but then Youngjae had gone MIA, refusing to come to work or answer his phone or door.  Part of Daehyun had been relieved at the time, but now it was starting to affect both of their work and honestly, the tension alone was killing him.  He didn’t actual hate Youngjae, he was actually starting to enjoy their relationship before it had been convoluted in this huge mess.  Maybe, just maybe, if they talked about it, he could get that back.

                “Do you have a minute?  We need to talk,” Daehyun asked as he sat down in the chair across from the younger.  Youngjae stared at his iPad, his grip on it tensing, but Daehyun could tell that his eyes were merely staring at it, not looking at anything in particular.

                “I’m actually a bit busy.  I have to catch up on-“

                “Youngjae, I’m sorry.”  The apology cut through the room, stopping Youngjae in his tracks.  He tore his gaze from the device in his hands and looked up at the man in front of him.  Daehyun was looking back at him and he was surprised by the sincerity in his eyes.

                “I-I-“

                “Youngjae.”  The door the dressing room was thrown open and one of the PR reps stuck their head in, disrupting the pair.  “The president wants to see you two ASAP.  We have the people here for your charity commercial.” 

                “Ah sure, we’ll be right up,” Daehyun smiled, trying to hint at the PR rep to leave so that they could continue their conversation, but the man didn’t seem to be getting it. 

                “Ok, let’s get going then,” he said, refusing to move from the door.  Daehyun and Youngjae shared a glance before sighing and following the man up to the top floor.

                “Mr. Yoo!  We’re so happy to meet you.  We were ecstatic to hear about your interest in our cause,” a man and woman, both dressed in frumpy and ill-fitting suits stood and greeted Youngjae as he walked in the door.

                “Oh, are you the rabbit people?” Youngjae asked, shooting a look to the President.

                “Rabbit people?” the duo quirked their heads inquisitively at him.  “We’re here because you agreed to do a campaign for the endangered Bekko Tombo.”

                “Bekk- Bekko-what?”

                “The Libellua angelina?!” Everyone in the room turned and stared in confusion at the overly excited Daehyun.

                “That’s right!” the woman said, smiling brightly as she moved closer to him.  “You know about it?”

                “Of course!  It’s been on the endangered species for the last ten years, but it hasn’t been getting the attention it deserves, despite being listed as a national treasure in Japan,” Daehyun chattered back, his eyes alight with excitement.

                “What in the hell are we talking about?!”  Youngjae snapped in, not at all appreciating the way the woman was ever so subtly sidling up close next to Daehyun.  “What kind of fluffy animal is this?”

                “Fluffy animal?” The man turned his attention the actor.  “The Bekko Tombo is a species of dragonfly.  Why are we talking about fluffy animals?”

                “Dragonfly?” Youngjae spat back.  “We’re talking about some flying insect?!” He turned to the President in indignation.  “What part of fluffy animal did you not understand?”

                “Think about it, Youngjae,” the PR rep stepped in.  “Those types of animals have their own shtick going for them.  They’re already cute and adorable and can sell their own postcards or stuffed animals to raise funds.  They don’t need you to be a face for them.  But something like the Bekko Tombo really needs all the help it can get.”

                Youngjae glared daggers at the PR representative, about to rip him a new one about how he had no interest in being thrown on camera next to some creepy crawlies, but Daehyun spoke up and cut him off before he could start.

                “I think it’s a great idea!  Oh you should really do it, Youngjae!”  He turned to the woman who was now pressed against his arm, staring at him with a glazed look in her eyes. “Did you bring in some for the filming?  I’ve always wanted to see one in real life.”

                “What the hell are you going on about over there?  Why do you know what this thing is?” Youngjae snapped.  Seriously, he had never seen Daehyun so excited or animated before and all they were doing was talking about bugs.

                Daehyun gave the room a sheepish grin, rubbing the back of his neck as he revealed his confession.  “I was actually really into insects as a kid- collecting them, categorizing them, memorizing all the Latin names, everything.  I wanted to grow up and be an Entomologist, but my parents wouldn’t hear about it.  Everybody already thought I was weird enough as it was.  I guess it’s always been my secret hobby.”

                Youngjae stared agape at his brunet manager while the woman Entomologist looked even more love struck than before.  “That’s so amazing…” she cooed.

                Youngjae glared daggers at the woman, ready to tell them all to go to Hell, but his mind quickly kicked in.  The only reason he was doing this anyway was to impress Daehyun and seeing the excited look on his face now, this really was his chance, no matter how gross he found it.  He’d just have to put up with it for a few minutes and then he’d have gained some mega brownie points.

                “Alright, I’ll do it.  When do we start?”

                “Good, stand just like that.  But… Youngjae… you need to be smiling, not grimacing.  You’re supposed to be convincing people to send in money to protect their habitats, not to send in the exterminators.”  Youngjae tried to fix his face, to make his smile more believable, but it was hard when he had a full grown dragonfly in a cage in one hand and a larva version crawling around on the other.  But luckily he was very good at his job and managed to bring out a smile, reciting his practiced lines.  He looked behind the camera and saw Daehyun beaming ear to ear and he couldn’t help but feel his heart jump.  If this didn’t get him in, he didn’t know what would.

                He was reciting his lines, pleading for money and for consideration in preserving habitats, all from memorization, his attention actually fully focused on the brunet behind the camera.  Everything seemed to be going well until he noticed “Bug Lady” slithering back up to HIS Daehyun once more and looping her arm into his.  He unconsciously glared his eyes as he saw them whispering, her blatantly signaling that she wanted to go out for drinks later.

                “OVER MY DEAD BODY!” he growled, gaining everyone’s attention as he pointed angrily at his nemesis.

                “Uhhhh…I don’t think those are the lines, Mr. Yoo…” the director flipped through the script.

                “Mr. Yoo, where’s the larva?” Bug Man asked and Youngjae’s attention moved to his now vacant hand.  The crawly critter was gone.  “Ok, everyone, it is very important that we find that larva.  It is a critically endangered species so we have to keep it safe and sound.”

                Everyone set to checking the floors, including Youngjae.  It couldn’t have gone far, he didn’t flail his hand all that much, did he?  He kept his eyes glued to the ground, looking intently, until he felt a squish underneath his foot and his stomach plummeted.

                “Oh ,” he cursed a little too loudly and thus drew everyone’s attention to him.  He lifted his foot slowly, a few sticky guts clinging as he revealed the now incredibly dead and incredibly squished larva.

                “MURDERER!” Bug Woman screamed, pointing an accusing finger at him.  He would have shouted back at her if it wasn’t for Daehyun’s face catching his attention.  His manager wore an expression of abject horror and disbelief as he looked at the flat carcass of the endangered insect that Youngjae had just killed.

                Youngjae couldn’t take it anymore.  The only reason he had agreed to do this stupid thing was to show Daehyun that he could be a nice and caring person, but he had, of course, just ed it up.  Just like he ed everything up.  He wasn’t capable of being a nice person, something was bound to go wrong if he went against the universe and tried.  He shoved the still caged dragonfly into Bug Man’s chest and took off, ignoring the calls of his name.  He needed to get away- get away from everyone’s hounding, away from Bug Woman’s look of contempt, and mostly, away from Daehyun’s look of disappointment.

                He hadn’t even realized that he had been crying until the elevator doors closed and he caught his reflection in the mirrored doors.  He looked a mess with streaks running down his red cheeks and did his best to wipe them with his sleeves.  He took the elevator from the studio down to the lobby and raced out of the building.  It was pouring down rain, but he didn’t care.  Maybe a good soak would do him good, help him clear his head.  He heard a call of his name as he ran down the street, but he didn’t stop.  He just wanted to get away from everything.

                Youngjae showed up to work the next day and did his best to ignore everyone staring and whispering behind closed hands as he walked by. He went straight to his dressing room, slamming the door behind him and flopped down on his couch.  He felt a feeling of dread filling the pit of his stomach- a feeling he was becoming all too familiar with.  It was official, Daehyun absolutely hated him now.  The elder had obviously expressed his feelings very clearly the morning after the party and even though he had apologized, Youngjae had surely ruined any chance of salvaging any workable relationship after he slaughtered an endangered member of Daehyun’s beloved hobby.  He knew the manager would show up any minute to give him his schedule and that he needed to face him, needed to apologize about everything, but he still didn’t want to.  He was scared of being rejected yet again, of once again seeing Daehyun’s face so filled with disgust and hate.

                He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples, trying to soothe himself and calm down before the inevitable happened.  And too soon it came, the knock on his dressing room door that he was completely unprepared for.  “Youngjae?”  The usual call came before the door opened, but Youngjae’s eyes snapped open.  That wasn’t Daehyun’s voice.  Instead an intern stepped in, visibly terrified and shaking. “I-I-I mean… M-Mr. Yoo?”

                “What?!” Youngjae barked, upset that his moment of meditation had been disrupted by this driveling dimwit.

                “I-I-I’m here with your schedule…”

                “My schedule?” Youngjae furrowed his eyebrows.  “Why are you bringing me my schedule?  Where’s Daehyun?”

                “H-He called in sick today.”

                “Sick?!”

                “Y-Yessir.  He ran after you yesterday.  He didn’t come back for a while, I don’t think he could find you and he seemed really worried.  He was completely soaked when he came back, so I think he caught a cold.”

                The intern had barely finished his sentence when Youngjae had leapt off the couch and strode past him out the door.

“Wait!  Sir!  What about your schedule?!”

               Youngjae checked the address in his hand for the one hundredth time as he stood in front of the brown apartment door.  By this point he had more than confirmed that this was Daehyun’s apartment, but he just couldn’t bring himself to raise his hand and ring the doorbell.  What if Daehyun didn’t want him here?  What if seeing him just made the elder feel worse?

            Shaking his head,  he pressed the button and waited.  No matter how he felt, he needed to apologize.  He had been putting it off for far too long and he owed Daehyun more than that.  He took a deep breath, shifting the heavy bags in his arms, and waited.  After what felt like forever Daehyun’s raspy voice came over the intercom, full of surprise.

              “Youngjae?  What are you doing here?”

               Youngjae looked into the camera as he held the bags up for Daehyun to see.  “I brought you soup.  Sick people are supposed to eat soup, right?”  There was no answer, but Youngjae could hear Daehyun’s slow and steady steps nearing the door.  Soon it creaked open, revealing a disheveled Daehyun dressed in sweats and a blanket cape.  His eyes looked droopy and his nose was red and running.  He made to take the bags, but Youngjae pulled them from his grip, moving past him into the apartment instead.

             “You look like ,” Youngjae commented as he toed off his shoes and stepped inside.  Daehyun gave a small chuckle that then turned into a momentary hacking cough.

              “I feel like ,” Daehyun responded once his coughing had subsided, though his voice was rough and raw and his nose severely congested.

               “Get back in bed, I’ll make this for you.  You shouldn’t be up,” Youngjae commanded, pushing Daehyun back towards the bedroom.  Daehyun quickly complied since he wasn’t sure how much longer he could stand anyway.

             Once Daehyun had disappeared, Youngjae set his bags down on the kitchen counter and started searching for materials.  He growled as he bumped his way around the kitchen.  Daehyun’s apartment was much smaller than his and he wasn’t used to such a confined space.  But soon enough he managed to find a bowl, spoon and can opener and had soup in the microwave.  He grabbed a small plate, arranging some crackers and a glass for orange juice while he waited and ran them to Daehyun’s bedroom, setting them down on the bedside table.

          “You didn’t have to do this,” Daehyun said as he blew his nose.

           “Yes I did.”  Youngjae gave him no more of an answer than that, instead he swooped down and placed his hand on Daehyun’s forehead, frowning when it felt hot.  He stood and disappeared and Daehyun heard the bathroom sink running for a second before Youngjae was back with a wet washcloth in his hand.  “See?  You may have died if I hadn’t shown up.  Seriously, you’re an adult and you don’t know how to do these basic things?” he chided as he folded the cool cloth and placed it on the elder’s forehead. 

            Daehyun looked up at Youngjae, surprised the see the sincerity and seriousness in his eyes.  This certainly wasn’t the Youngjae he was accustomed to.  Honestly, nothing about Youngjae this week had been what he was accustomed to, but this particularly caring side was a pleasant surprise.  Before he could think on it too long, however, the microwave buzzer went off and Youngjae was back out the door.  He came back in moments later, carrying the steaming bowl of chicken noodle soup.

           “Sit up so that you can eat and don’t choke,” Youngjae told him and Daehyun quickly complied.  The elder couldn’t help but smile at the image of Youngjae walked towards him, face set in concentration as he blew on the hot soup, trying to cool it off.  He looked like the perfect image of a concerned mother or lover and Daehyun felt his heart picking up pace.

             “Now be care because it’s still h-“  Youngjae’s foot caught in a pair of pants that Daehyun had discarded haphazardly on the floor and he lost his balance.  Everything happened as if in slow motion- Youngjae falling forward, letting out an ear piercing scream, Daehyun’s eyes going wide, knowing the inevitable was coming but not being able to do anything to stop it.  Soon it was his scream filling the room as the soup bowl flew from Youngjae’s grasp and turned over, spilling all on top of him.

             “!”

             Youngjae landed on the floor with a thud, but immediately scrambled up to check on his manager.  Daehyun’s torso was covered in vegetables, noodles and soup and when he lifted up his shirt, this skin underneath was a smart red.

             “Daehyun, I’m so sorry. I-“

              “I’m going to go take a shower.”  Daehyun abruptly stood and padded toward the bathroom without another word.

             Youngjae fell on the bed and did his best to scoop the soggy noodles and vegetables into the bowl.  Once accomplished he stood and started jerking the sheets off the bed, but soon his watering eyes were blurring his vision and he fell back down as a sob ripped through his chest.  He really couldn’t do one god damned thing right.  No matter what he tried, no matter what he did, he’d always find a way to mess it up and make Daehyun hate him even more.

              “Youngjae, what’s wrong?” Daehyun stepped back into the room, showered and in fresh pajamas, just to be greeted by the sobbing Youngjae hunched over on his bed.  He darted across the room and kneeled down in front of Youngjae, forcing the younger’s hands from his face and revealing his tear stained cheeks.  “Why are you crying?”

               “I-I-I’m such a up.  I don’t blame you for hating m-me,” Youngjae sobbed.  He tried to take his hands back, wanting to cover up his hideous crying face, but Daehyun refused to let go and held them tight.

              Daehyun felt a sharp stab of guilt piercing through his chest.  He didn’t hate the younger, he should have never said that he did, but he had just been confused and distraught at the time and, rather than coming to terms with his own feelings, those words had been the easiest to say.  But now, as he saw how much damage he had actually caused, he regretted ever saying them.

            “I don’t hate you,” he whispered, transferring both of Youngjae’s hands to one of his so that he could reach over to the bedside table for a tissue.  He dabbed at the younger’s cheeks, but Youngjae quickly jerked away.

           “Yes you do!  That’s what you said!”  Youngjae managed to jerk his hands free and cover his face once more.  “But I don’t blame you, I hate me too.  I’ve been mean and done horrible things to you.  Even though I said that I like you, I didn’t actually think about your feelings.  I just pushed for what I wanted.  And then even when I was trying to make it up to you this past week, I just wrecked that too.  I’m so, so sorry, Daehyun.”

         Without thinking Daehyun leaned forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Youngjae, pulling the younger into his chest.  The position was awkward- Youngjae sitting on the bed while Daehyun kneeled in front of it- but neither cared, it was what both of them needed at the moment.  Youngjae tucked his face into the crook of Daehyun’s neck, continuing to crying, while Daehyun tightened his grip and rubbed his hand soothingly up and down Youngjae’s arm.

            “I’m the one who’s sorry, Youngjae,” he whispered, “I really didn’t mean those things that I said.  I was just confused.  Hell, I still am confused.  There are so many things going on right now.  I just… you were right that there’s something between us, I’m not going to deny that anymore.  But I need you to understand that first I need to get everything figured out and settled.  I can’t promise you anything, but… I can tell you that I don’t hate you.  I don’t think you’re a bad person.  Also… I’m really glad that I came to work for you.”

          Youngjae’s sobs subsided into hiccupy sniffles as he pulled back and wiped his cheeks with his sleeves.  Daehyun’s words had calmed him and he looked up to see Daehyun staring at him with a desperate look in his eyes.  So there was a chance.  Something else was going on that he didn’t quite understand, but Daehyun had definitely said that there was a chance. “Do you mean it?”

             “I do, so please don’t cry.  I just need you to be patient.” Daehyun smiled, his hands still rubbing up and down Youngjae’s back.  Youngjae softly returned the smile and lunged forward again, arms wrapping around Daehyun’s neck.  Daehyun welcomed the embrace, his chest feeling much lighter now that he had confessed his true feelings and he was no longer plagued by guilt.  He couldn’t help the gnawing feeling as he came to mind, but maybe Yongguk had been right.  Maybe it was time to move on.

          “So did you really do all of that stuff this past week just to impress me?” he laughed and he felt Youngjae let out a small growl against his neck.

           “Are you laughing at all of my hard effort?”

          “N-no,” Daehyun answered, though he couldn’t keep his voice even.  “It was…cute.”

         “Says the bug man,” Youngjae scoffed.

           “YAH!  Don’t make fun of that.  It’s totally cool and manly to be into bugs.”  Daehyun pushed Youngjae away from him in indignation, but Youngjae just gave him a judging look with his eyebrow raised.  “Is this really the thanks I get for running all over the city in the middle of the rain looking for you?”

        “I didn’t ask your to do that.”

         “Well, you were crying.  I didn’t know what you’d do if you were that upset,” Daehyun confessed, tone turning slightly more serious as his bit his bottom lip.  Youngjae’s expression softened as he  gazed down at the older man.

           “You were really worried about me?”  Daehyun nodded and Youngjae once again threw himself on him, this time lunging off the bed and landing in his lap.  Daehyun managed to catch him without falling over and wrapped his arms around his waist.

         As Daehyun was settling into the embrace, feeling comfort in Youngjae’s warm body wrapped around his, the younger suddenly jolted up, startling Daehyun and knocking him back.

         “I forgot something, get back in bed.”  Youngjae disappeared from the room and Daehyun threw an extra blanket down on his now bare mattress before climbing back in.  Soon Youngjae had reentered the room, holding something behind his back. 

           “When I was at the shopping center getting your groceries, I found the shop where you bought Joko.  They had the newest edition, and I thought you might like him.”  He produced a large and fluffy bunny that was a twin to the one that Daehyun had bought except that instead of yellow this one was white and gray.  Daehyun smiled as he reached out for it and Youngjae placed it in his arms.  He looked at the name tag, reading the name Youngjae had written there.

          “Keke?”

        “Well, I figured he deserved a name just like Joko.”  Youngjae’s tone was serious, but soon he broke out laughing, Daehyun quickly following suite.

         “I love it.  Keke and Joko.”

           Youngjae sat in his dressing room, spinning in the make-up chair, completely and utterly lost in thought.  He had left Daehyun’s apartment last night after making the elder another bowl of soup (that he luckily didn’t spill this time), but the manager’s words wouldn’t leave his head.  What was it that he was so confused about?  Youngjae really got the feeling that it was about more than just the two of them, but he had no idea what it could be.

         A knock on his door interrupted his reverie and soon a blond man he vaguely recognized was sticking his head inside.  “Yoo Youngjae?  Do you remember me?  I’m Im Jaebeom from Matoki Entertainment.”

           The memory clicked and Youngjae raised an eyebrow at the man, not even bothering to stand and greet him.  “What are you doing here?”

         Jaebeom seemed to be taken aback by the less than warm welcome, but his regained his composure, putting on a dashing smile, and pushed forward.  “I was wondering if I could invite you out for a drink with me.  360’s been on break so I’ve had a bit of free time and I just couldn’t get you out of my mind.”

          Youngjae scoffed at the cheesy pick up line and turned back around, wanting to wander back off into thought.  “No thanks.”

          Once again the reception was colder than Jaebeom had anticipated, but he had no intentions of leaving until he got what he wanted.  “I thought maybe we could talk about Daehyun.  You know…the reason why he left Matoki…” He smirked when he saw that he had gotten the actor’s attention with this.  “The reason why he won’t date you…”

          Youngjae knew better.  He knew Daehyun hated this man and that he should wait for Daehyun to tell him himself…but the temptation to know was becoming too much for him.  What exactly was he fighting against to win Daehyun’s heart?

         “What would you like?” Jaebeom asked, running his hand down Youngjae’s arm from across the table as they looked at the menu, but Youngjae quickly jerked away. 

         “I’ll have a coke.”

         “A coke?” Jaebeom furrowed his eyebrows in disappointment.  “What’s the fun in that?  You don’t want something with a bit more of a kick?”

         “A coke’s fine.”

         Jaebeom sighed at Youngjae’s short and obstinate answer, but called the waiter over anyway and placed their drink orders.

         “I’m guessing I’m not going to get much small chat out of you, am I?  You want me just to cut to the chase?”

        “That would be helpful.  It’s the only reason I came out since Daehyun seems to not have very fond feelings for you.”

      Jaebeom couldn’t help but laugh.  “That is certainly true.  And it just makes this story so much more fun to tell.  The reason he had to leave Matoki Entertainment was…”

      Daehyun trudged down the hallway toward his office.  He still felt like but after Youngjae’s disappearance and cancelled appearances and filmings, he couldn’t afford to take off more than one day of work without getting at least something done.  He had rested most of the day and now he intended to come in, work at his desk for an hour or two, and then take the rest home so that he could work from the comfort of his own bed.  He reached his door and opened it,  groping the wall for the switch to turn the light on.

       As the office illuminated, he felt his breath catch in his throat when he saw who was in there, sitting at his desk.

      “HYUNG!  SURPRISE!”

       Before he had any time to react, the person bounded across the room and lips were being planted firmly against his.

        “I missed you so much, Hyung.”

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Author’s note: 

You guys have no idea how hard it was for me to get this chapter out.  I don’t particularly like it- it didn’t come out at all how I had planned.  Let me know what you think below.

Also, this will be the last chapter before my vaca.  My friends are coming Thursday night (it’s now Sunday afternoon), so I’m going to try to start the new chapter so that I’m not starting from page 1 when they leave (since it takes me like a week).  They’ll be leaving on the 29^th, so expect the next chapter out around July 1^st (ish.  I make no promises).

HOWEVER!  As an apology for running off, I will be hosting another “contest” thing.  This time it will be based on commenters.  So, whenever I’m ready to post the next chapter, I will look and see the total number of comments.  Then I’ll generate a random number from 1-2?? And that numbered commenter (since all comments have their own numbers), will get to request any one shot!  I’ll post the results with the next chapter, so look for it in the Author’s Note.

Sorry I’ll be running off on you guys, but I hope that this long chapter will be enough to get you through (it’s actually the longest yet).  Though I actually kind of hate it, I hope you will at least like it.

I love you all!  Thank you for being so fabulous and always making my day <3

Dani