4:10 pm

There on the white casket, with all the world's beautiful flowers surrounding her, lies the most delicate of them all. She appears to be sleeping; with that smile of kindness never fading from her lips. She sleeps on peacefully; she sleeps on to forever.

The little chapel is half-filled with flowers; by those who can't make it and by those who can, but decided not to. For this is a private occasion. This is a personal occasion. Like the whole world agreed that these precious moments when she will be last seen on earth should be reserved for those she loved the most.

Soojin looks down on her folded arms; her eyes red and swollen. The dried tears draw faint lines against her beautiful face but even with the absence of it, it seems like she has aged more than her actual years. Moon Soohee sits beside her eldest daughter. The beautiful older lady has lost her youthful glow, her dark glasses rests on her nose and for every while, her shoulders will shake uncontrollably as a new set of tears spring from her eyes. The cheerful Choi Jungnam keeps his face straight and holds his wife tighter. His eyes travel, as if on their own, to the framed picture of a smiling girl that was his youngest and he feels his grip grow weaker by the second.

The circle of people present are those who are close to the family. Most of them, close friends from church, from the business, and her own circle of friends. Actors whom the public never knew to have connection with the girl on the white casket drop their heads to pay respect. Some staying for a while to let their eyes dry; some leaving soon before the tears drop. Most say nothing but offer a pat on the back for the ones who are left.

The piles of flowers grow as each visitor comes and goes.

A huge wreath with a ribbon stenciled with Jo Insung's name arrives. Kim Jaedong tries miserably to brighten up the air by saying something like "She isn't fond of Insung-ssi now. Look, she's ignoring the flowers..." but his voice breaks before he finishes his sentence. Cha Taehyun manages to give a bitter smile before tears choke him up and silence consumes them once more.

One by one, her close friends arrive. Stella Kim breaks down in Siwon's arms before she can even reach the coffin. Her sobs echo over the tiny room and the man has to lead her gently into the nearest pew. He stands back up as Arden Cho sits beside the crying girl; her puffy eyes hidden by her glasses. The two wrap their arms around each other; trying to find a pillar of strength into the person of another. Jaeson Ma and Vanness Wu sit beside the two; the former lost in thought, in melancholy, in prayer.

Siwon walks courageously towards where she lies. His facade arranged in that gentle, composed manner he often practices. The one she would endlessly compliment whenever he puts it back on their drama workshop days during their trainee years. His eyes appear unchanged as he looks over her sleeping form. He bents his head and offers a prayer – it takes a minute more than what he actually intended and he knows it will take much, much longer to get over the fact that he just lost someone so dear to him.

He has lost his sister.

Stubborn tears fall when he feels Eeteuk hover over him. The older man's face is shining with the rivers flowing from his eyes. He seems not to care if he is loud, for he continues sobbing. Donghae, Ryeowook, Shindong, and Yesung gather like lost boys around their leader. Each one takes their final glance. Ryewook holds Yesung hands as both take a seat on an empty seat. Shindong has to bring Eeteuk as Donghae cries his heart against Siwon's back; in which the latter buries his face on his palms when the tears prove difficult to stop. Hyukjae refuses to come closer, his fist closing on a letter in his pocket, the paper deformed from his clutches, it would have been difficult to read the awkward Hangeul handwriting of a certain Chinese boy who was once very close with the girl surrounded by the flowers.

The standing mourners who cry for those who weren't there are guided back to their seat by a depressed Choi Minho. No words are spoken as they trod gently towards where the rest of SHINee sat staring into space. Jonghyun, with his eyes blank and dull; Key, with all the colors doing nothing to brighten his expression. Taemin and Onew are speechless. Luna, Krystal, and Sulli sit silently together; their heads bowed in solemnity.

The light from the door dims when Lee Yeonhee comes walking in. She paces forth, lost in thought, with a tight-lipped BoA and the remaining TVXQ members on their side. The two ladies walk first to the family before seating themselves. Jung Yunho bravely walks to the casket, very much like what Siwon did. He puts his hand against the glass separating her to him and closes his eyes in reverie. Shim Changmin walks up next to him, the latter's face, blank.

“It's sad that we got closer just recently... and then this happened.” It is barely louder than a whisper but Yunho hears him. He holds his dongsaeng's hand and answers back.

“You are lucky, Min.”

They go back and find their seat just as Victoria comes in with a runny-nosed Amber on her arms. The older girl's nose are pinkish red but it looks paler in comparison to Amber's. The younger girl walks to the casket; takes one look at the framed picture, and drops her head on the wooden cover.

“Unnie...” the words get caught up in before she can let them out. Victoria walks over and looks at her helplessly, her eyes dank and distant. Changmin rises to his seat and walks over to them. He consoles the younger one and guides them back when he stops on his tracks.

A few gasps are heard as three men walk towards where the casket is. BoA sniffs a bit too loud, her tears falling like raindrops against her cheek as they roll by the sad smile she has on her lips.

It was Yoochun who looks first. His shoulders shake just as Junsu takes the framed picture into his arms. Jaejoong looks silently from behind his glasses, tears making wet marks on the collar of his suit. For a minute, the room bates its breath. Then Yunho stands up and walks over to them. He stands beside Jaejoong and the latter holds on to him. Light steps are heard as Changmin walks slowly towards them. The maknae takes his stand behind his brothers and rests his hand on Junsu's arm.

“Yah! Sooyoungie-” Junsu's voice breaks a bit. “We are complete now. You see? Yah! You can wake up now.” Changmin tightens his grip on him.

“Wake up, now... please.” it is a helpless plea and Junsu breaks down on Yoochun's shoulder. Changmin feels something wet form in his eyes and he raises his head when he felt someone's arm cross over his back, wrapping the four of them in an embrace. The liquid falls warm against his cheek as he meets Yunho's gaze; the older man giving him the saddest but purest smile he had ever seen on his face as the leader's rare tears race against each other to the ground.


Why is it that old friends get together only when they aren't complete anymore?


In those few minutes of reconciliation, the world continued turning but somehow, it isn't the same as before. One by one, the Super Junior members join the embrace. All the people looking tries to bite back the tears; lost between the strong pull of painful happiness and blunt sorrow.

The boys make their way back on their seats. Hearts heavy but feeling as if a burden was taken off their shoulders. The music that has been playing the whole while is finally heard after the sobbing grows soft. The melody wafts into the air and everybody looks up as Choi Soojin stands up from her seat.

“If any of you are hungry, we have food. Sooyoung wouldn't want you to be hungry.” she gives them a sincere smile. “It would also be nice if we talk about happy things... she would prefer this to be a happy occasion.”

And as if it has always been there, a serene but peaceful mood fills the air. Stories start flying and hearty laughter replace tear-stricken faces.

“Do you remember when she once tried to eat an entire bowl of jajangmyeon in five minutes?”

Eeteuk never runs out of stories. They were all good. Though he tries to pick the funniest ones among those he has in his memories, he will always end up with a rather heartwarming story about the girl and the solemn air will hover once again.

It was on one of these stories when Cho Kyuhyun arrives in the room. Siwon stands up immediately and some of the girls share knowing looks. He walks slowly... and from behind him appears Lee Sungmin. They walk past Siwon... straight into the front. Sungmin traces a finger on the framed picture; blinks back welling tears and walks with his head down towards Moon Soohee. He extends his hand towards her but is surprised when the older woman stands up and gives him a hug.

“Ming, you came.”

That was all it took before jewel tears spill on his cheeks. For even if those tears are precious, he cannot stop them from flowing. He wonders why, even when he has said goodbye before, it still hurts to do it all over again. His vision gets blurred as he slumps back on the vacant seat; thoughts wandering back to that day in 2008 when he first threw his arms around her as she bade the radio show farewell. How back then, he was the one doing the consoling and now, the table has turned and he knows that even if he'd hug her and say it isn't goodbye, it won't change the fact that it is the end.

He is too immersed in his thoughts that he fails to see Kyuhyun looking over the casket, into the face of the girl who will forever remind him of everything that is broken. She looks so happy with her eyes closed and her cheeks red. Kyuhyun half-expects her to open her eyes and say “see, so you do care about me” but she sleeps on.

She sleeps on; and if before, Kyuhyun wonders when their time will finally meet, now he knows the answer. That maybe, the reason why everything between the two of them never made sense is because they are supposed to be that way. Or maybe, it is supposed to be different – that they are supposed to be right, but because he is stubborn and she is prideful, fate lost hope and let them grow farther and farther away from each other.

The air grows denser around him as he continues to look on her serene face. All the thoughts and memories start gushing towards him like a waterfall and his hand falls limply on the casket cover as he tries to pacify the thoughts. At one point in time, she liked him. But, somehow he kept running away; thinking if he'd give a little chase, put on a little challenge, everything will fall into place. He kept on running and running until he is too far to notice that she has lost him... that she got tired too... and that she has given up the chase. He looks at her and is reminded of everything that should have been had he been brave enough to do it. He is reminded that his story about the girl he first loved who fell for Hyukjae is but only destiny's bait. That the real story should have started between him and that girl who is now separated from him by a thin glass and an eternity of broken dreams.

He shouldn't have stopped believing. But now, there's no sense of holding on. It wasn't when the water pooled on the glass did he realize that he is already shaking from crying. His hand flies to his mouth, in an attempt to stop the tears. He closes his eyes but it won't stop. He takes one last look at her before he runs out of the chapel.


Later that day when everybody left; albeit with all hesitation and redundant words of anguish and sorrow, Soojin gives Goo Hara a final hug as the girl all but refuses to leave her seat. It is when the sign outside the little chapel door bearing the name 'Choi Sooyoung' is taken down, eight figures come in hesitantly to meet the sad, waiting eyes of Moon Soohee.

The eight huddled together and silently wrapped their arms around the grieving mother, a hauntingly beautiful sound of a family's heart shattering into pieces was last heard before the chapel doors shut close.

A/N: This isn't strictly a ChangSoo fic but it's Sooyoung-centric and I want to post it here. This one-shot was written yesterday around 4AM (Aug 30 2011) but it came to me as a 'premonition' last August 24 2011. HERE is a cap of my conversation with my friend about that 'premonition'. I was supposed to write this beforehand --- I should have written this beforehand. Maybe, the accident wouldn't have happened. I don't understand it too but I can't help blaming myself.

I'm really sad. Let's pray that Sooyoung be able to recover soon.