12th Word { // 끝난거야 // }

You tightened your grip on the key as you stood there, infront of the door of the music room. The door that would connect you and Myungsoo. Time check, You said to yourself. You glanced at your wristwatch, showing 4:58. Two more minutes. You didn't understood why but you wanted to actually open the door at exactly 5 pm. You wanted to open it but something is stopping you. You placed you right palm on the door, as your left hand was still holding on the key. Do I really want this? You jasked yourself.

You glanced at you wristwatch again, this time, it says 5:00. You slowly inserted the key before twisting it with the same pace. Thump. Thump. Is he here? You opened the door, revealing the music room, just like how it was before. Nothing was new, except for the newly installed windows. You looked around, trying to find the reason why you were here. You felt disappointed when you couldn't find Myungsoo.

Myungsoo-ah.

What did he want? Was he playing with you? You didn't know what to do now, so you held on the key tightly, muttering a low "babo". I'm so stupid. You kept repeating the phrase in your head. Why did I believe such a cruel joke? You bit your lips and turned around, only to find the person behind your miseries. "M-myungsoo-ah." You gasped. He stood there, smiling shyly at you with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. 

"Hey."

Slowly, he walked up to you and handed you the beautiful bouquet of flowers. You accepted it hesitantly. You felt a light headache forming at the back of your mind. A buzzing sound in your ears and butterflies in your stomach. Is this real? You asked yourself. Is he really in front of me? You realized how stupid you look right now. You just stood there, gaping at Myungsoo. But Myungsoo wasn't having any of that. Instead, he gently touched your face with so much affection. 

"I missed you."

And thus, your tears began to work their way up to your eyes and down to your cheeks. You tried wiping it off but it was no use. Is this really real? I-. Myungsoo placed both of his palms against your cheeks gently before wiping your tears with his thumbs. "Don't cry." He whispered. But that didn't stop your tears. Instead, it made you cry a lot harder than before. He is real. He is here. You placed you free hand on top of his that was on your cheeks, tightening your grip on them. "You're real."

Myungsoo nodded. "I am." He whispered. "I miss you a lot, ____." He withdrew his hands on your cheeks and wrapped them on your waist. He hugged you tightly, whispering "I love you." Your breath hitched and your heart skipped a beat, before beating faster than usual. You were about to say what you feel, that you love him too. But he cut you off, "I'm sorry for running off. P-please come back to me." His voice wavered, trembling even. 

You wrapped you arms around his neck, clinging unto him and he takes this as an answer to his question. You wanted to scream and tell him how much you love him, but the words are stuck in your throat. Why? Why can't I just say it? You asked yourself. You tightened your grip on him, burying your face on his shoulder. You cried and cried until the dark slowly rises. "___." He called you. But you just clung unto him like koala. He smiled at your cuteness before kissing your head. "Come on, we might get locked in here."

"____-ah." You heard Myungsoo calling you again. Myungsoo. 

You lifted your head from Sungyeol's warm chest, revealing the worried look etched in Myungsoo's face. You stared at each other, making one member of Infinite roll his eyes. Sunggyu caught it and smacked Woohyun's head lightly. The latter pouted before Sunggyu pulled him away from the scene and into the dark. The other member's decided to leave as well. They knew that you and Myungsoo needed privacy. Sungyeol unwrapped his arms around you, patting your head before saying Goodbye.

You watched as they left the club. What now? What will I do? He still hates me right? You felt confused and happy at the same time, now that Myungsoo is in front of you. Confused because he wasn't giving you the cold shoulder and happy because he was holding you hands and pulling you out of the club and into a secluded park. Myungsoo knew no one goes here, becuase it was well-hidden from the public. So it's safe to talk here with you.

A swing was standing in the middle of the park, having two seats like it was made specially for the two of you. Both of you sat down, silence reigning in the air. Swing. Swing. You used your feet to push yourself before letting it  swing by itself. The person beside you was only sitting down, looking up in the sky. "Oppa." You broke the silence and called his attention. Even though you weren't looking, you knew that he was looking at you. "I'm sorry." You started.

Myungsoo's eyes widened. Why is she saying sorry? I'm the one at fault here. He reached for you hand that was gripping the chains a little bit too tightly and intertwined it with his. "What are you talking about ____? I--" You cut him off, wanting to tell him everything you feel. You never had the chance to say this because you were scared. Scared of what? Rejection. But now that the opportunity is here, you knew you can't let this go. You had to grab it. 

"I'm sorry for not being a good girlfriend. I know that I'm too timid. Sensitive too. I always thought I was the understanding and caring girlfriend. Letting you do things that you want. Not wanting to interfere in your work. I thought I was doing a good job of being your girl. But it turns out I wasn't. I was a bad one." You paused because you felt his hands tightened slightly. You heart thumped loudly in your chest.

"___-ah! You are n--" 

"Oppa, let me finish. Please?" At last, you looked at him in the eye, seeing so many emotions in his beautiful brown orbs. 

He sighed before nodding at your request. You also tightened your grip on him as a thank you with a soft smile.

"I haven't been the best girlfriend out there," You continued, looking at his incredulous face. "Though really, I thought I was being an understanding girlfriend for you. But I wasn't. I wasn't anywhere near that word. I was selfish oppa. I was being too selfish. I only thought about myself the whole time." Knots twited and turned in your stomach. Tears slowly surfacing it's way out. "Oppa I'm sorry." You said desperately leaning your head on your intertwined hands. "I wasn't a good girlfriend to you. I was nothing but selfish and clingy. I- I don't deserve you." You choked. Your eyes watering and your sight getting blurry. "I don't deserve you. You deserve someone better."

Myungsoo got fed up with what you are talking about and stood up, never letting your hand go. He pulled you up and into his embrace. His warm body covering yours from the cold wind. "____. Are you stupid?" He whispered in your ears. I am. You answered in your mind. "You are everything I ever wanted. Everything I needed. You are not at fault. I am. I was the one being a bad boyfriend. I can't take you out on dates and hold your hand proudly. I can't kiss you like the world will end in public. Heck! We can't even do anything couples do because of my situation. We always hide in your apartment and spend time." You hugged him back, squeezing him with every fact he was saying. It was true though. Myungsoo laughed an empty laugh. "What kind of a boyfriend am I? I can't even proudly say that you are my girlfriend. Please don't say that you don't deserve me. Because it's the other way around baby."

He buried his head at the crook of your neck, blowing softly on it. It sent you shivers down you spine."You don't deserve the treatment I was giving you. I'm sorry ___. I'm sorry." He squeezed you tightly, never wanting to let you go.You didn't know when you started crying, but you did. And cried a lot in his chest. Sad to say you knew you look stupid but you didn't know how to express what you feel without crying.

"Oppa mianhe. Oppa." You desperately clung unto him. Loving how his hands fit perfectly around your waist. "I'm sorry too, ____." He said, his voice trembling. He was on verge of his tears but he knew he had to be strong. For you. 

You laid your head on his chest, drawing random things on his arm. You were back in your apartment, laying quietly on your bed. Both of you were tired, physically and emotionally. His snuggled you closer to him, if that was still possible. "I'm sorry." His voice echoing in your room. You looked up at him, staring at his handsome face with his eyes closed. "For what?" You asked. 

He took your right hand pressed it on his cheek. "For being weak. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from getting hurt. For not protecting you from my fans." You smiled at him and pinched his cheeks. "That's alright oppa." It already happened, so what's done is done. You shifted on your stomach, laid on top of him. "Everyone is bound to get hurt anyway." You smiled gratefully at him. 

"Yes but I coul-" 

"You could but you wouldn't. They are your fans oppa. They love you and they would do anything for you. Just, just let them be, okay?" 

"Let them hurt you and what? You want me to watch how they would make you feel sad and uncomfortable?" 

"Sshhh. Let's not talk about this now okay? Tomorrow. I'm sleepy." You snuggled on his chest and closed your eyes. Shifting here and there until you were comfortable in your place.

Myungsoo nodded and tightened his hold on you. "I love you."

Your heart leaped. Did he just... You looked at him with wide eyes. How many years has it been since he last told you those words? You heart tightened and wild butterflies flew around your stomach."Y-you what?" You asked stupidly at him. He laughed at your reaction before repeating it. "I love you. I love you. I love you." 

Blood rushed up in your face and pooled in your cheeks. "I lo--" You covered his mouth with your hands, still blushing. "I- I get it. Stop repeating it." because if you continue, I would die out of happiness. He bit your hands playfully, making you retreat it. "No~ I won't stop until you burst."

"But I'm already bursting!"

"Yep. You are as red as a tomato baby." He teased.

You hid your face on his chest.

END.

thanks for reading everyone. :) This is the last chapter.

I'll upload a short epilogue after a day or two. Or a week.

Please comment what you think and criticize me if you like. I nee a lot of tips to improve this story. 

love lots <3