Dear Diary,


It’s 4:25AM. I have hardly slept a wink since my arrival to my new dorm. It’s small in size and simple in design but I’m quite comfortable. The décor isn’t as elegant as I am accustomed, but somehow I appreciate it more than my own home. Along with my discoveries of my new dorm, I have also come to meet my roommate, Hyorin. She is a very bubbly character who easily opened up to me about her family, life and especially the love of her life, Kim Woo Bin. “He’s in love with me, and I’m hoplessly in love with him” she tells me. “He told me while on vacation in Hongdae that he’d like to marry one day.” She said with tears welling in her eyes. It must be wonderful to cry tears brought on by pure joy. My tears have always been of sadness. My tears aren’t warm but cold, just like my heart. The last occasion when I felt these joyful tears was when we shared our first kiss.
 
    He caught me completely off guard.We were standing in the middle of a park in Daegu at 5.25pm while the evening sun began to turn shades of faded blue and orange. One that cold winter day, time completely stopped. It was the day when I first admitted that I had absolutely fallen in love with him; the day I finally allowed my heart to be happy. We held hands while strolling along a path blanketed in white snow. I can recall the bad mood I had been in that day when mother broke the news to me about us moving, yet again; I remember how unjust it felt. I was beside myself and frustrated, pacing back in forth in my spacious bed room in the midst of pastel blue painted walls, until my sun called and settled my attitude. “Let me take you somewhere to relax.” He told me over the phone as I could sense the bright smile in his voice. The weather was awfully cold as the skies had just dropped down layers of snow, but Jongdae knew that I needed fresh air and time away from the house.
           So there we were, standing in the heart of the vacant park enclosed by a lovely sea of white. The park lights and the setting sun shined through the snow making even the air appear radiant. He pulled me near and placed his hands kindly on my face and stared into my dazed eyes and said: “Be happy…for me. Okay?” his usually cheerful and bubbly persona turned serious for a second. “Yes” I nodded while my cheeks began to feel warm. I glanced up for a second and averted my attention to the now dark and grey skies as it began to snow again, but before I could prepare myself for what was to come, he kissed me. I felt the snow gently pat my forehead as all my cares and worries began to fade.
            These moments I will never get back. Never again will I experience the warmth of his smile or the comfort of his embrace. Every sleepless night, I lay here in bed and dream of these beautiful memories. I contemplate what life would have been like if he were still by my side. To wake up everyday and know that I’ll see the light shine through his eyes every time he looks at me. Why did life have to turn out this way? Why was I the one to lose love? When I come across people like Hyorin, it makes my heart feel even colder. Maybe it’s jealousy or possibly something else. Whatever it is, I don’t appreciate it.                   
                                                                                Sincerely Yoo Ro,

Carefully, I place my Diary back into the top drawer of my modest brown nightstand and return my head to my pillow. The warmth of the night forces me to shove my blankets from off my body; I just lay there on my back with my arms folded over my stomach and head turned toward the big picture windowbeside my bed. I peer through the crakes of the blinds at the angry wind blowing through the trees and the bright glistening street lights. I look over at the clock: 5:40 it reads; Hyorin still hasn’t arrived from her night out with her boyfriend. “So careless and free” I sigh to my self as I finally decide to get up and get an early start on my hair for the first day of classes. Sitting up and dropping my fatigued feet onto the nice and cool hard-wood floor, I make my way to the bathroom and grab my curling Iron.

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Knock Knock

I’m startled by an unexpected knock at the door, almost burning my finger with my curling iron. Untangling myself of the cord I yell "Just a minute"

"Oh.....okay" an unknown voice hollers through the door in reply. Who might that be? I inquiringly think to myself. Finally freeing myself of the self-made trap, I scamper out of the bathroom to the door. On my tiptoes I peer through the peep hole and find a wide-eyed, fluffy haired stranger with big glasses and a grin to match. Hmmmm... Maybe he has the wrong dorm? I wonder to myself as I turn the door knob. Startling the corky looking boy as I open the door abruptly, I say "Yes? May I help you" my voice going all high-pitched.

The fluffy haired boy grins from ear to ear, bows, then says in reply "Annyoenghaseyeo! I'm dorm leader Park Chanyeol. But you can just call me Channie! Since today's the first day of classes this semester, I usually like to show the newbies to their classes and such. " he says enthusiastically, his grin growing brighter and brighter with every word.

Even though I'm sleepy and feel lifeless somehow this bubbly boy managed to raise my spirits for a moment. "Ahh... I see. I could certainly use your help today. Just let me get my things and finish getting dressed." I say while glaring down at my blue childish Pororo slippers.

"Of course! By the way, I have those same ones. “He told me assuring me of my dignity.

Absolutely humiliated, I tuck my left foot behind my right in attempts to hide my little schoolgirl attire. "Just a moment” I say completely crimson. "Okay, just meet me down the hallway." He says while making his way to the dorm next door.  

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“Keys? Check...Wallet? Check…Ipod? Yep, but why do I feel like I’m missing something?” Glancing around the room like a lost dog, I finally spot my little auburn colored nightstand beside my bed in the corner of the room. “My Diary” I say, opening the drawer to fetch the small pink book with a sparking timepiece chain dangling from the side.

Feeling complete, I shove my things into my Coach tote and make my way out of the door in search of that curious feathery haired, eager boy.