It’s been exactly a year since their separation, and Youngjae never felt emptier. At least in the past Youngjae had something to wait for, someone to wait for. He didn’t anymore, and that makes him feel terrible.

Even though months passed, he always expected Daehyun to come back to him and tell him why he left in the first place, but he didn’t, and that hurt. It hurt very much, but Youngjae never admitted it. He hated how he used to be, how pathetic he was, how desperate. All that, just for a boy… But, Daehyun wasn’t just any boy. He was his first love, and that kind of love never really goes away.

Starting anew was much harder than what Youngjae expected. Everything reminded him of Daehyun, especially masks. Youngjae figured that it was Daehyun. Of course it would be him, why would a stranger run away from him? He was confused, very confused.

Why was Daehyun wearing a mask? Why was he at his graduation? Why was he wearing a mask? Didn’t he want Youngjae to see him? Questions were filling his mind, to the point that he wasn’t able to focus on the simplest of things anymore.

“Hey Youngjae,” Jongup said as he sat down on Youngjae’s bed, “what would you like for breakfast?”

I know what you’re thinking. What’s Jongup doing in Youngjae’s house?

It all started when...

~~“Where is he? I’ve been waiting for half an hour now!” Jongup muttered as he locked his car and walked up to Youngjae’s apartment.

He knocked a few times, but there was no response. He could hear shuffling on the other side of the door, but there was no response.

“Youngjae, it’s me Jongup,” Jongup yelled, “open up!”

Youngjae thought about whether he should open the door or not, his apartment was a mess! He opened the door slightly and poked his head out.

“What are you doing? It’s 7:30!” Jongup nagged.

“I’m almost done, just give me 5 minutes!” Youngjae pleaded.

BANG.

“Youngjae, what was that?” Jongup asked suspiciously.

“Nothing!” Youngjae replied, a bit too fast.

“Let me in.” Jongup said as he pushed the door slightly.

“No!” Youngjae pushed back.

Jongup didn’t believe that clean and organized Youngjae would be so... Chaotic.

“What happened here?” Jongup gasped, “That’s it, I’m moving in.”~~

“Cheesecake,” he mumbled, “I’d like cheesecake.”

Ϟ

Living with Jongup was tiring, that’s for sure. Youngjae knew he was only trying to help him, but it was too much.

“I called the hospital today and told them you’re sick.” Jongup said while they were having breakfast.

“Huh? Why would you do that?” Youngjae looked at Jongup as if he was crazy, he would never let Youngjae skip on work!

Jongup lowered his head to hide the smile that was on his face, “We didn’t spend a whole day together ever since we left Korea.”

Youngjae chewed on his pancake slowly as he thought about what Jongup said.

“Where are we going?” he asked and went back to eating.

“It’s a surprise!” Jongup smiled, and Youngjae nodded excitedly. He was looking forward to spending the day with his best friend.

Ϟ

Jongup planned the day well, Youngjae had to admit. They went to the park in the morning and rented bikes, then they went to the amusement park, and now they were in a fancy restaurant.

“Today was really… Different.” Youngjae started with a smile.

“You liked it?” Jongup smiled back.

Youngjae nodded and they went back to eating. He couldn’t help but feel that something was going to happen, but he wasn’t quite sure whether it would be a good thing or not.

Ϟ

As soon as they arrived at the apartment, Youngjae hugged Jongup and thanked him repeatedly.

“I really had a good time Jongguppie!” Youngjae said while hugging the brunette.

Jongup hugged back, a bit too tight for Youngjae’s liking.

“Youngjae…” he started, “I would like us to do this again.”

“Of course we will!” Youngjae replied happily and let go of Jongup, but the latter held on tighter.

“Is something wrong?” He asked as he patted Jongup’s back lightly.

“You don’t understand…” Jongup mumbled. “I don’t want us to do this as friends.”

Youngjae pushed Jongup away lightly and looked him in the eyes. “What do you mean?”

Jongup raised his head to meet Youngjae’s eyes. “I love you, Youngjae.”

Youngjae felt a pang in his chest. Not the kind you get when you’re in love, the one you get when you’re disappointed.

“Jongup, you know I can’t…” Youngjae whispered.

“You can’t what? You can’t love me back?” Jongup raised his voice, “Is it because I’m not good enough? Or is it because of him?”

Youngjae’s eyes widened slightly, “He’s got nothing to do with this. You’re being stupid.”

“Oh I’m being stupid? Do you even know what he’s done?” Jongup yelled.

“Stop trying to make everything about him!” Youngjae yelled back, not noticing the tears that were running down his cheeks.

“How can you be so sure?” Jongup scoffed, “you barely knew him!”

“Because I trust him!” Youngjae sighed.

Jongup grabbed a box from his room and threw it on the floor.

They were all photos of Daehyun. Photos of him with gang members, photos of him fighting, photos of him laughing after a fight… They were horrible.

Youngjae felt his legs weaken and he dropped to the floor. “What is this?”

“This is the real Daehyun!” Jongup laughed bitterly, “His brother was the leader of a gang, the Jangs. They’re the biggest and worst gang in South Korea! They beat up people for money, and sometimes they’d beat them up just for the fun of it!”

“How do you know this?” Youngjae whispered, barely audible.

Jongup’s smile was wiped off his face, and was replaced with a frown.

“You’re one of them, aren’t you?” He said getting up.

Jongup clenched his fists and looked away. It was not supposed to be this way.

“Aren’t you?!” Youngjae yelled.

“Yes! I ing am!” Jongup shrieked, “They hurt my brother! They burned their safe house! That’s why Daehyun got beat up, that’s why you met!”

“I can’t believe this…” Youngjae muttered, “You’ve been hiding this from me the whole time. I thought you were different, but you’re just like the rest.”

SLAP

Ϟ

I don’t know how long I’ve been running. I couldn’t believe this; it was all just too much! Why would Jongup do that? I was almost over him, after a whole ing year! I was so close, and now he ruined it all!

The two people I love the most in my life, the two people I trust, the two people I’d do anything for are like them. I still can’t believe it.

My legs started to get numb, I’ve been running for too long. I finally stopped and looked at the sign in front of me.

“Cheesecakes! Buy two, get one free!”

What is up with my luck? I chuckled sadly.

I decided to go in. I didn’t bring a jacket with me and the weather was awfully cold at night. I decided to get two cheesecakes, which will be three, according to the sign.

I was in the middle of eating my 6^th slice of cheesecake, yes 6^th. I couldn’t stop myself, eating just made me forget about things for a while. I was too engrossed in my cheesecake to realize that there was someone standing next to me.

“I see you like cheesecake?” he chuckled.

That voice…

It can’t be…

I raised my head to look at the owner of the voice…

“Youngjae?” He gasped, “what…”

I got up from my seat quickly, eyeing the badge on his shirt.

“Owner.”

“Youngjae…” He started.

“Don’t,” I shook my head and backed away, “don’t come near me Daehyun.”

Daehyun ignored my pleas and walked closer, his eyes twinkling.

“Youngjae listen to me,” Daehyun stopped, “I-“

“Shut up!” I yelled, “Don’t say a word!” I can’t believe this, how can he be so cool about this?

“What’s wrong?” he asked softly.

“What’s wrong?” I chuckled miserably, “I ing know who you are Jung Dae Hyun.”

“What do you mean who I am?” Daehyun asked, confusion plastered on his face.

“Jongup told me everything.” I replied, “Don’t you dare come near me.”

Daehyun’s face darkened, “What did he tell you.”

“That you’ve always been one of them,” I said, unable to control my shaky voice, “I know everything.”

“No, Youngjae, you don’t know.” He replied darkly, walking towards me.

“Yes I do know!” I yelled, I couldn’t hold it in anymore, “you fed me lies and you left me! You meant so much to me, that it scared me! I didn’t know what to do when you left. I didn’t know if I should wait for you or carry on with my life! And before I realized, it’s been a year and I haven’t heard from you! You told me to wait for you! To trust you!”

I didn’t notice that I was sobbing until Daehyun walked closer to wipe my tears. I flinched before he touched me, and he just looked to the floor.

“You have nothing to say now, don’t you?” I said, trying my best to steady my voice, “don’t you dare come near me.”

And I ran.

Ϟ

A/N: Hello everyone~~

I’m a day late ;-; I was supposed to update yesterday but I was too tired and I fell asleep /sigh/

I really like it when you guys comment, it makes me feels all happy and want to update faster TT

Anyways, I still can’t decide on how to end this story… fluff or angst or fangst? Yes, fangst is a word. (maybe) FLUFF+ANGST.

So comment and give me your opinion on the story, eh :3?

Chu~~