I sat beside the well-polished windows in class, with my ear-plugs stuck into my ear; ballads blasting into my ear. These slow sentimental songs describe my feelings. I turned to my right, only to see Joey’s arm hooking onto Il hoon’s. Just then, Mrs Kim called out, “Joey Shin and Jung Il Hoon! Class is not a place for the both of you to act so intimate! Get out of my class!”

Some girls in class snickered while some turned to look at me. Ugh, annoying. After a few minutes of their absence, my curiosity about what the two might be doing irked me.

/Recess/

I stepped into the green field, it was serene and calming. I plugged in ear-plugs and played my favorite song or all time; why did I fall in love with you - DBSK. Although it was a Japanese song that came out in 2008, it has been my favorite song since then. Unknowingly, I started to sing along.

“Why couldn’t I call out to you at all?

Every day and night growing emotion,

And words overflow,

But I realized that,

They’d never reach you again.”

“You always listen to this song,” a familiar voice was heard from behind. Shocked, I turn around only to see him. He looked completely different. His eyes were red and shriveled. There were terribly heavy eye bags. His skin looked so pale, not fair, but P-A-L-E. In general, he looked haggard.

“Il Hoon,” I tried to touch his face.

His quick reflexes made him slap my hand away. There was a loud smacking noise. Tears escaped my eyes, ‘’, I thought. I doubted if our love was ever genuine, why? Why would he let himself become like this? Why am I even letting myself become like this? Why are we destroying our selves for this crazy thing they call ‘love’?

“I’m sorry, Kyung Mi…I just- I’m sorry. I missed you, I missed us. I am sorry for whatever I said to you that night. I was being too much of a douche back. Please, just…return to me?” He pleaded, tears slowly cascaded down from his guilty eyes.  Should I give him one more chance?

“Il Hoon, stop. You are not a douche bag,” My body started to move as if on its own accord, a hard slap landed on his face, “Wake up… Be yourself.”  Tears poured out of my eyes and I ran towards the bathroom.

I gave myself a hard slap on the forehead. Why did I do that? Argh, Jeon Kyung Mi, you in’ idiot.

/Fast forward/

A month and 2 weeks had passed since I slapped him. We became very awkward, and avoided each other’s gaze. I sensed that something was amiss when Il Hoon suddenly asked me to meet him at the park we had our first date at, after school.

I sat on the empty swing by myself, kicking the rubber tiles. Surprising, I was 5 minutes earlier. I checked my phone, 3:27PM, he should be here soon.

Awhile later, I saw his figure. He walked over, full of confidence and charm. ‘Ah, our Il Hoon’s back,’ I thought as a smile crept onto my face. I was more than elated that the REAL Il Hoon was back. I ran over to him and hugged him, I missed this so much. My heart skipped a beat, like the first time.

“I’m back, baby. I’m still sorry. However, would you…be mine?” He gave me a bright smile. I loved his smile, his touch, his personality, his aura, everything about him.

“I’d be honored, yes. Don’t be sorry, it was my fault for not loving you enough, you gay !” I stuck my tongue out like a child and ran around the swing area.

“Shut up, tortoise!” He chased after me.

Suddenly, my vision went black. Oh . Not this again.