"All I wanna do Wanna do
Is to erase you
Is to not cry because of you anymore"

Kara's Jiyoung "Wanna Do"

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The taxi rounded the corner almost as quickly as it had sped off twenty minutes before. The gruff driver checked his rearview mirror aggitatedly as he grunted in a harsh tone "Here".

My hand found the correct change and he motioned it to be placed in the small bin in front of me, "thank you, sir". It smelled fresh, new, and all too exciting. A whole new adventure, with new faces. Dad would be excited too.

"Lydia Ahn?"

I turned away from the taxi and confronted the small, meek voice belonging to my sponsor- Kang GilRan.

"Annyeonghaseyo~" 

She politely motioned for me to follow her with an endearing smile. She was an old lady, perhaps in her late fifties or early sixties, but nimble and still quite lovely. Her skin was pale and youthful, as was her voice which sounded like a small child's. Her height was just under my shoulder, but she was fast. And strong.

GilRan opened up a door on the second floor of the gray, densely furnished and lightly populated studio building. Each door seemed the same, gray upon gray-except for the silver plated address beside the lock. She smiled and motioned for me to enter the threshold first. My eyes adjusted to the graying walls of what seemed to be white many years ago. It was a bit cold, because the room was empty and drafty from the vents, but other than that, the studio was empty and drab. Almost little to no color existed except for the linen light blue curtains hanging on the only wide window of the floor. 

But, in other ways, it seemed just like home. GilRan gave me a quick tour around the floor, allowing me to carry around the key that was provided in case I forgot the code. She smiled at each stop, giving me time to ask questions or say "that's pretty, thank you." But, I was pretty much spacing out. I wondered how I would make the quarters more cheerful. 

If I just had the permission, I would decorate it myself....

"Is everything ok? Do you have any questions?" She tinkled with her high voice kindly.

I nodded quickly, "Is it ok if I repaint and decorate the room?" 

GilRan touched my arm lightly and her face brightened even more as she spoke "of course, you will do whatever you want to that room as long as you're here. And please, call me Ahjumma Ran. That's what everyone calls me." 

"Thank you, I think I'll explore for a bit.."

GilRan nodded and scurried away, bouncing slightly as she walked on her heels. I took in a deep breath and prepared myself for a deep planning of the room. Perhaps a light pink? I'll keep the curtains since they are still in good condition...but maybe I'll revamp them. 

Entering the furnished studio, now my home, I took another look at the walls. Pink... then I looked at the blue curtains excitedly. Blue, pink...

The sudden calming sound of beach waves entered my memories. The swish swish swishing of the waves hitting the sand echoed as the scene of a contrasting light pink, flowing in the whipping breeze, danced. Then, a voice, deep and sonorous played. Laughter from a higher pitched tone disrupted his, and the silhouettes of two people running along a golden beach appeared within my mind.

The image became clearer, allowing me to see that the water was a shallow pale blue and the flying pink in the wind was a dress. The lightest pink, adorned with mother of pearl and silver lace. The wearer of the dress had brown, curly long hair, tousled from the wind. She laughed happily as the man beside her, smiled. 

He spun her around, never letting his gaze fall from her. They seemed so happy, so carefree. The scene faded away, leaving a dull ache where it had appeared. The smell of the salty sea lingered in the air, as if I was actually within the scene. A tear fell, and I found myself to have cried at the image. With my sleeve, I dabbed at my heavy eyes and sniffled to myself. It wasn't abnormal to feel like this after an episode, this was just how it was. A random scene, a few tears, the dulling, numbing, aching feel that was left behind. 

I never understood the episodes, because they were never in an exact order. Just random.

With a few more drops wiped, I set to work. It was a good thing that I brought my things with me. ping my suitcase, the smell of fresh brushes and watercolors permeated throughout the studio. Along with it the scent of stencils and canvas erupted through, asking to be used. I took out my stencils and colorful pens first, setting aside the canvas. 

Instead of a canvas, I took down the blue curtains and began to prepare my colors and brushes. My hands went to work, fading the colors perfectly. I willed the sensations back: the air, the waves, and the dress in simultaneous convergence so that the colors represented all the emotions that had overwhelmed me. The sun outside my window was beginning to lurk behind the trees when I stepped back to examine the product with satisfaction.

Much better. 

Repinning the curtain, I sighed at the final product and turned quickly at the sound of a hollow gasp at the door. GilRan stood, hand over and eyes wide open. My heart sank "you don't approve of it?".

She shook her head slowly and tears formed, "it's lovely...you have a gift!"

I smiled bashfully and thanked her as she stared  and it amused me of what she didn't know. I had painted this out of emotion...memory, even. Something that felt so real but I know had never occurred...It's too bad...I wish it had.

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Author's Note:

Hello readers! :3

The passage that you just read is a preview of the next chapter. It's just a quick scrabble that shows you where our character Lydia is now. There is a bit of overshadowing, so hopefully I didn't give away too much XP

But, when I have more time, maybe later this week or tomorrow, I will update again. I'm sorry if it's a bit slow atm! These parts are totally made up on the spot because I didn't want to give away the juices until I am free. But Next chapter will be so much better! I promise~

Until then, it was DaeJaeBangHimUpnLo~ Annyeong~<3

Next Chapter will be up maybe tomorrow: What You Believe to be Fate is Just an Illusion