(JINKI’S POV)

I was staring at the Window when  My mother ask me to see someone whose sat in front of me. This is the first time, I met Her. with her beauty skin, cold face, calm attitude, and…seems like she doesn’t talking too much.

I saw her beauty Face changing when our parents was talking about matchmaking. It almost brought tears in her eyes and , was about to say something but she can’t. Maybe somewords, like rejection, denial, something else like that. Then maybe she knows, whatever she said right here, and Now, She cannot change anything that has been deciced.

So do I. my parents talk to me about this , Three days ago. Don’t say that I never ignored it. I do.  But, the reason is very weak in comparison, the evidence that they have been getting. When I say something like ‘I want to focus on my study, mom’, then she said, ‘you've earned a ranking of the parallel at school, and now you've just won the title of exemplary student, Jinki’, she denied my statement. But, I tried to reply it again with, ‘but, what if my grades go down because of this, dad?’, My father looked thoughtful for a moment before he said, ‘I guess, the only thing to worry about is your spouse, Jinki’,

‘I have a Girlfriend!’, tried to ignore once again.

‘No, You don’t.  we know it better than yourself, son.’ Said my Parents. holy ! how stupid I am, realizing that the person are talking to me right now is my parents. of course, they have known VERY well about me than myself. Especially, when I was lie. ‘Then, what if she already had boyfriend Mom?’, never give up to continue my protests.

‘she had. But, she’ll broke up with her Boyfriend, jinki.’ My mom simply answered.’it wasn’t fair MOM! You cannot do that!’ still complain.

‘Jinki, LISTEN TO ME! First, Not just ME who did it. your father, her parents, our Big Family! This is for the best, Lee Jinki. Then, you should stop making protest to me. cause, whatever you said, you must still marry Her, you know that?!’ she looks ranging emotions. but I've done that before, and she didn’t care, anyway.

‘You CANT DO THAT MOM!! YOU CANT FORCED ME TO DO IT!!” Exclaimed a little scream, when I realized that my mother began to leave and return to my statement with ‘OF COURSE I CAN, SON!’.And, she leaved.

…

How stupid! My parents really controlling me, myself, my life, and absolutely My Love Life. So, Here Iam. Standing in front of her. My future wife. how can this women be my wife as before, we dont know each other and just met today?!.

“is he your son, Lee?” , middle-aged man who might be the father of the woman in front of me started a conversation with my parents. My dad, nodded slowly then smile to her parents. “our son named is Lee Jinki. What about yours, Jung?” he slowly asking back to her parents

.

“our daughter named is, Jung-Soojung. Some people, called her Krystal too. But, I prefer Jinki to call her Soojung. the named its very formal and good for your future wife, right Jinki?”  her mom try to asking me with soft smile.

I cant say anything to her. all I can do is, a forced smile. the woman, who sat in front of me start to make disgusting look to me and I just pretended not to see it.

“tomorrow will be the happiest day. because, Jinki will be Soojunghusband soon. Our Lovely Daughter. agree?” her parents announce it without hesitation. my eyes widened hearing the statement. I turn to see, my parents reaction. Go to hell, when my parents said yes with pleasure without looking at my reaction or Hers.

I gave up for the next few seconds. my eyes, glancing at a girl named Jung-Soojung. a girl, who would become my wife tomorrow, her eyes began to glaze back tears, ready to stream down on her white face. I never said, I didn’t like her anyway…but, seems like..she doesn’t like me.  When, I see the disgust look from her face before.. enough for telling me that, she hated me.

She turned to look at me, for a second. Our eyes meet. Locked each other. I feel sad and so did she. Then, we turned to look our parents face was looking happy. They are happy. But we don’t.

Or…

Just maybe, only her. Like I’ve said before… I didn’t say, I didn’t like her. I just dont know, what am I supposed to felt? Happy? Or sad?

Soojung really looks like the kind of women in my type. Maybe… I might like it.but… what about her?!

‘tomorrow is a very tiring day and perhaps, would be a strange day for me’

***

“Lee Jinki, would you like to be the husband of Jung-Soo Jung, in difficult circumstances, happy, and sad?”  the headman, asking question such as weddings in general. I turned to my parents who  standing not so far from me.  They nodded their head, telling me to answered ‘Yes’ .

“I-do.” I answered simply.

“Then, you Jung-Soojung… would you like to be the wife of Lee Jinki in difficult circumstances, happy, and sad?” the headman, asking the same question to Soojung. I couldn’t talk or move or breathe for the matter. waiting for an answer from the woman who would become my wife.

she does not love me .. she might have answered 'no' to this question.  But if its true, then, what will be happen next?!

“i…do”

A statement out of , made me aware of my crazy thought. Is it true? we have legally become husband and wife. Very easily.

I looked at her and saw a few tears began to stream down again in her face. After, the headman announce legally wedding. We kissed. Soojung looks so sad when, we do that. I don’t know, what am I supposed to do?

I just want to do something which making her happy in the rest of my life. I kissed her like she’s the only one person who I loved. The only place that I had in my life, like the only thing can make me breathe. Her lips pretty soft and warm. The only thing, I could say is…I cant get enough of it.

I opened my eyes slowly only to see her reaction. And I was surprised, when she locked her eyes with mine  so deeply then after that, she kissed me back. Suddenly, she kind of tilted her head to the side, and I did the same. Her lips moved a little against mine. It was nervous and tender, but it sent a million more fiery tingles down my spine. I started slowly moving my lips against her too.

She kissed me back with pleasure. And I didn’t see those tears again in her eyes when she kissed me. My way its fully worked. *I guess!

We kissed not for long. then pulled away, because we heard some noise which kind of disturbing our kisses, from the audience who still laughing and smiling at the same time. Our faces was all red and flushed. Soojung gave me a sweet smile for a seconds later and I responded with mine.

Maybe… I already falling in love with her since we first met. Just might-be…

***

The next week after married. she tends to be a wife in general. preparing breakfast when I woke up. then, prepare my clothes when, I was about to go for college. yeah, we were still in college. Should I remind you that, its match happened when we were still a student at different university?! I guess not.

The only thing we didn’t do was  a . I try to appreciate Soojung, by not sleeping with her since our wedding. I was afraid, afraid of hurting her.

the day that I saw her cry at the wedding day made me realize. this is not, her wanted it. even though, my life became worse as it is now ... but, I don’t mind as long as Soojung happy and don’t need to do things that she didn’t wanted. I will not force her to live happily with me.

because her parents surely, have forced her to live like this. like, what my parents had done to me. the difference is, I love Soojung. I love my life as long as it can be with her. Met and live with her, such as a multilayered gift of my life. But for Jung-Soojung, maybe she thinks all of this is the heaviest calamity in her life.

…

“Jinki, you still want to go home? Because eum…raining outside” my best friend ask me worriedly. I smile at him,then nodded slowly.  “my wife alone at home, I was afraid something happened to her..”

“hahaha  seems like, you're very happy with her. Well,… be careful!” he said again. Then I nodded slowly as I ran towards the campus parking. Then I jumped into my red porsche when finally I found it. My car. More comfortable than, whatever all those things in this world.

I drove my car quickly towards apartement. My apartement with Soojung. Yea, I could say our apartement. The heavy rain was fell today, actually can repel loneliness that I had. Lonely?

Yes, Im lonely. Very lonely.

its not the way I choose to lived.

***

When I arrived after parked my car in the parking area. I saw, Soojung standing in lobby with a guy. It seems, that guy just drove her to our apartement from their campus. She talking to him with melancholy and the same expression also show the man's face. when my wife walked to our apartment, the guy walked away from the lobby with a very sad face then, he gone.

Soojung boyfriend, wasn’t it? *my thought

**

“soojung-ssi!” I called her, when finally arrived in my apartement. She looked up to found me then, turned  to smile. Sweet smile.

“that man…eum…I saw…I-I mean, that’s your boyfriend wasn’t it?” finally forced my question out of my head. actually, I saw that man before in our wedding day. He was talking with Soojung, when other guest in my wedding greet me. And then, he left after they talk a little bit longer.

Soojung looks more surprised when I ask that question. I think, its not a hard question anyway, Or.. isn’t it?

 “N-no. he’s just my friend..” she answered slowly. I know she lie. Because, when she answered my question, her eyes avoid mine. “why did you ask, anyway?” she questioned me back.

“ouh, nothing. J-just making conversation… w-we cant always meet up with silent, right? Especially, because were live together in this apartement. So… I guess, I have to ask some question to make us feel more comfortable around eachother..” I explained. She turn to be silent for a next second.

I don’t know what she thinking right now. Maybe, everysingle my words earlier, or… she disagree with my explained. She might be choose silent than talk a little with me.

 Yea… it might be.

“I guess, I want to take a bath. Im so tired, sorry for disturb you!” I said with, looking her face. Then, I turned to leave to the bathroom. I just didn’t wanna stay longer in this situation. Almost half a month, we always turned to be silent and I cant take it any longer.

Better I leaved, than I have to stay like that with her.

***

The water really warm than usually I used it . feel a little hot when it touched my white skin. Im tired. So tired, cause I have to live with the same condition like this. I love her. I really loved Soojung. Even though , she didn’t. I said it earlier, right?

Im okay with this. Im okay, if I should stay in this situation as long as she happy. But, why?!

Why she cant be honest with me?

why she couldn’t say what she felt?

why she couldn’t say WHO’s that Guy?!

why she can’t say things which always made ​​her cry for three times in this week?!!

She can tell me anything. It might be better than she hold it alone by herself. I know, we’ve been forced together but… cant she takes me as a Friend?

…

as I feel healthy again after a bath, I went straight to the music room contained a piano in there. I think singing is the second thing that can restore my thought to be relax after shower. singing is the happiest thing. I want to pour out all the contents of my mind erratic in this song.

then I started~

..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kgu1ofbTl2g

***

after two hours had passed, I got out of the music room and heard a strange noise from inside my bedroom. or ,more precisely Soojung room. Because, I never slept in that room since the day we got married.

I guided my steps approached that room to find out what happened. just make sure, that my wife is okay. the door is not closed. in fact, I could see into the room even, I'm not standing right in front of the door-room.

It was a dark and silent at first. But when I try to get more closer, I can hear that clearly. It sound like someone’s crying silently.

My Soojung.

I was speechless. I didn’t want this But, it seemed like she want to. How could this situation always end up like this? What am I supposed to do?! Did she crying because, suffer have to live with me?! did I really annoying and pathetic person?!! Then, why I must born and lived in my life until Now?!!

Questions above questions and no answers to any.

I looked down. bangs shut my eyes, my hands clenched. I have to got the answered of my hard question. then with it, I guided my steps again to approached her slowly. She looks surpised and quickly, wiped the tears from her eyes to greet me with a sweet smile. Or I should called it, FAKE smile. Cause, she pretend to smile for me after, she was crying earlier.

“why?” I said. She looked at me.

 “why are you crying, Soojung?”  my words clearly, made her looking down such a hidding something.I cant take it any longer. I just want her to be happy. So, I have to say,..

 “do you want a divorce?” I said it, finally.

She just looked at me with a look of disbelief and shock. I dont know what the response means.

TBC

*AUTHOR’S NOTE

Im so so sorry, for the wrong words or grammartical error.  I’ve said it before, right?! Im sorry please forgive me ~

Hope you still loved & Like it!

This chapter really hard. Not because, the story but the LANGUAGE.. I have to learn English speaking & writing a lot! Can anybody help me?~ L

Hehe, I’ve made this little chapter for 5 days ^^  

Im sorry once again, comment please ^^