June 28^th, 2005

To whom this may concern:

     Have you ever felt so wronged that you just wanted to die? What’s the best way to leave this awful world? To feel and suffer from physical pain or to not feel and suffer from pain mentally until the end, which would you advise? Physical pain would hurt a lot, wouldn’t it? I have a low tolerance for pain and I’m not one to inflict it either. But on the other hand, numbness is not pleasant. Quite frankly it is the opposite. To be void of pain would mean losing your senses, your emotions, your ability to rationalize, and your humanity. You become dazed and start to stray. You become a vagrant in your own mind. There is no place for you to be at ease. There is no place where you are welcomed. There is nothing. You feel nothing. You are nothing. It’s quite torturous when you think about it. On second thought, I want to feel numb. I want to forget.

Thank you so much,

Seo Juliet

P.S. You didn’t think I would actually sign my real name, did you?

P.P.S. I’m sorry, you don’t really care, huh?

She was meandering through the bustling streets of Seoul, mindlessly bumping into the civilians, who in turn would either briefly glare at her or push past her. She was too preoccupied to take notice of their peeved reactions and continued to wander aimlessly. She didn’t know where she was going, but she knew that if she stopped walking she would crumble. As she was about to turn the corner, she bumped into a tall figure dressed in a panda suit handing out business cards. Seohyun almost fell backwards until a pair of furry, black arms abandoned the cards—causing them to scatter in the air—and wrapped themselves around her waist. It was difficult to tell whether she was shocked by the sudden collision or not. Her faced remained stoic. Once the panda let go of her, she continued to walk as if nothing happened.

When her worn out legs finally brought her home, she tossed her purse on the coffee table and collapsed on her soft, regal couch. She tried to cry, but no tears emerged from her dull eyes. She sat there silently, staring at nothing in particular for the whole night.

A/N:  Did I mention this was more on the angsty side? Anywho, double update~ :D

Chapters will be called letters, hence the title Letter 1 ^^ As for the date, the year is totally random. I just didn't want to use 2012. And as most of you may or may not know June 28th is Seohyun's birthdate. Now why would she be writing such a letter on her special day? D: What happened? At first glance this seems like a suicidal letter, but it's not. Who's the panda? He's not Kris. And he's not exactly significant to the story either, but there's a connection~

Thanks for reading!