The moment Chanyeol feels like he is falling off of his bed, his eyes open wide and his heart races. He sits up and exhales, letting his heart go back to a normal rhythm. He turns his head to the right and that’s when he sees that he’s alone in bed. Chanyeol doesn’t think much of it—Kris' probably downstairs making breakfast or something—and slowly rolls out of bed.

 

            After his morning ritual, well afternoon considering it is an hour past midday, Chanyeol descends the staircase and goes into the kitchen. He is expecting Kris to be behind the stove or sitting at the table, but when he gets there, he’s alone. Chanyeol scratches his head as he backs out of the kitchen and walks down the hallway to the living room only to find that once again, he is alone.

 

            “Kris!” he calls out. There is nothing but silence. “Kris!” Chanyeol tries again, leaving the living room and walking through the house. “Kris, this isn’t funny!” Chanyeol keeps his calm as he searches for Kris in every single room in the house and ten minutes later when Kris is nowhere to be seen, reality sinks in.

 

            Chanyeol runs back upstairs and changes out of his night clothes before grabbing his phone, wallet, and keys and leaving. As he is backing out of his driveway, he dials Kris' number, but it just rings and rings with no answer. Chanyeol’s heart sinks in his stomach. He can’t be gone. He just can’t be.

 

            For the remainder of the day, Chanyeol goes anywhere he can possibly think of that Kris could be. He wanders around the park and searching down every aisle in the market and makes a round through the mall, but anywhere he goes, Kris is not there. Chanyeol tries his best to describe Kris, but there’s only so much he can say before the words beautiful or gorgeous or perfect slip from his tongue. From his description, it seems as if not one person has seen Kris and Chanyeol refuses to believe that he just disappeared off of the face of the earth.

 

            He gets back into his car and dials Kris number for the hundredth time that day, and this time, instead of it ringing and ringing, it goes straight to voicemail. Chanyeol doesn’t know what to think of this, so he calls again and gets the same result. He runs a hand through his hair and takes a breath before he pulls out of the car park for the mall and heads to the next place.

 

            Upon walking into the platform, Chanyeol waits in a line, impatient as ever until he reaches the front. He asks the workers if any of them have seen a blone-haired guy who, if not already, is about six foot- one with big, brown eyes. All three workers shake their heads and Chanyeol drops his head in defeat. The train station is the last place Chanyeol wanted to go look for Kris because he really, really doesn’t want to believe that he is gone.

 

            As Chanyeol stalks out of the platform, his stomach growls at him in such anger that Chanyeol remembers that he hasn’t eaten anything the entire day and the sun is practically gone from the sky. He walks to the closest food place which happens to be Subway and orders himself a sub. Chanyeol eats his sandwich with speed like he is in the finals of a food-eating contest because he needs to get back out there and find Kris.

 

            For the next three hours, Chanyeol drives through the streets of Seoul in hopes of spotting his husband somewhere. A million questions go through his head as he is driving: Where did Kris go? Why did he leave? Why didn’t he believe me when I told him it wasn’t his fault? Did I do something that drove him away? Why didn’t I hold on to him tighter? What if he went back to ing? Chanyeol shakes his head at the last one. Kris wouldn’t do that again, would he?

 

            A half past nine, Chanyeol gets a phone call from Kai. He almost doesn’t answer it, but he does. “Hello?”

 

            “Chanyeol, where the hell are you? We open in less than an hour.”

 

            Chanyeol glances at the time on his dash and facepalms. “, I didn’t realize what time it is. I’ll be there soon.”

 

            “Is everything alright?” Kai asks.

 

            “Not exactly,” Chanyeol answers. “Tell me this, is Kris at the club?”

 

            “No,” Kai pauses. “Should he be? Did something happen to him?”

 

            , well, there goes that idea. “I dunno. Look, I’ll be there soon, I promise. Sorry for being late.”

 

            “It’s no problem. You know I always have your back.”

 

            Chanyeol smiles for the first time that day. “Good to know.” And with that, he ends the call and rushes home. As soon as he steps through the threshold, he calls out Kris' name in hopes that he came back in the time Chanyeol was searching. For all Chanyeol knows, he panicked for no reason and Kris is knocked out on the couch after watching a few episodes of One Tree Hill.

 

            Full of desperation, Chanyeol goes through every room in the house just like he did earlier that day. When he walks into the living room, it’s just how he left it hours ago and Chanyeol can’t help but frown. He walks over to the back wall where all of the pictures are hanging and immediately, Chanyeol senses something off. His eyes scan the rows of photos and right when he gets to the center, he finds what’s throwing everything off—instead of the picture of Kris and Chanyeol, it’s the picture of Kris' parents. He knows how much this picture meant to Kris and it makes Chanyeol's stomach twist to know that it’s here and Kris' not.

 

Chanyeol retreats upstairs to his bedroom after that. He quickly changes into a black button-up shirt and black pants and makes sure he doesn’t look like he’s been running around town all day. Once Chanyeol looks presentable, he grabs his coat and heads out to the Red Wave.

 

            Right when he walks in, Chanyeol sees Baekhyun standing off to the side of the bar, talking to Lay. With the rage of the entire situation, Chanyeol marches right up to Baekhyun, pulls his fist back and collides it with his nose.

 

            “What the is wrong with you?” Baekhyun clutches his nose with his hands.

 

            “Wrong with me? No, Baekhyun, what the is wrong with you?” Chanyeol shouts. “You were my best friend and I trusted you and then you pull this ? What kind of person does that?” Chanyeol is filled with anger, so he punches Baekhyun again, this time in the jaw.

 

            Baekhyun can feel the warmth of his blood slipping into his mouth, but he ignores it. “All I did was show you the ing that you married. You do realize that he’s never gonna change, right? He’s always gonna be a and you don’t need that.”

 

            “That’s bull! What I don’t need is you! Get the out of my club,” Chanyeol orders.

 

            “Are you firing me?”

 

            “Hell to the yes, I am firing you,” Chanyeol replies in a voice that’s belittling Baekhyun. “You are not welcome here, my house, anywhere around me.”

 

            One of the security guards rushes over. “What’s going on here?”

 

            “Will you do me a favor and Baekhyun out? Make sure whoever’s at the front places him on the banned list,” Chanyeol requests to the bodyguard.

 

            “Are you sure?”

 

            “Are you ing serious?” Baekhyun asks.

 

            “Yes,” Chanyeol says simply, answering both questions. The bodyguard places a hold on Baekhyun's arm and leads him out of the club.  He turns around to find a stunned Lay and Kai looking at him with hesitant eyes. “What?”

 

            “What the hell just happened?” Lay asks.

 

            Kai hands Chanyeol an icepack from behind the bar. Chanyeol gladly accepts it and places it over his aching knuckles. “Baekhyun just proved to me who he really is and I don’t want that kind of person around me or my club.”

 

            “What did he do?”

 

            Chanyeol glances down at the icepack and takes a breath. “He made Kris believe that he didn’t belong here.” It’s silent for a good minute before Chanyeol looks up and at Kai. “D’you mind being the DJ temporarily?”

 

            Kai nods. “Yeah, no problem.”

 

            “And Lay, you okay with being a full-time bartender for the time being?”

 

            “Perfectly fine,” he replies.

 

            “Now if no one has any more questions, let’s finish setting up before the doors open,” Chanyeol states as he walks behind the bar and busies himself. Kai and Lay exchange a concerned look, but let it drop as they prepare for the night.

 

 

 

ONE MONTH GONE: DECEMBER

 

 

 

            Chanyeol drags himself out of bed in the early hours of the morning for one reason and one reason only: he’s taking a trip home. Last week after he spoke to his mom, Chanyeol decided to close the Red Wave for the last week of December and reopen after New Year’s.

 

            He walks in his parents’ house and he is immediately attacked by the twins. “You two act as if you haven’t seen me in decades,” he says, hugging his little cousins.

 

            “It has been decades.”

 

            “Lots and lots of decades.”

 

            Chanyeol chuckles. “Well, I’m here now and that’s all that matters.” He stands up straight and takes in how big the twins have gotten since the last time he was there.

 

            As the entire Park clan gathers around the table for lunch, the first topic of conversation is where Kris is. Chanyeol freezes the moment the blonde-haired boy’s name is mentioned and thankfully, as always, his mother swoops in and saves him. She tells the family that Kris simply couldn’t make it and just like that, everyone moves on to something else. Chanyeol mouths thank you to his mother and she nods in response.

 

            That evening, Chanyeol's father takes the girls out to the ice rink leaving Chanyeol and his mom to have some quality time together. She takes a sip of her tea. “Are you going to tell me what happened or are you going to continue beating around the bush?”

 

            Chanyeol sighs. He places his cup on the table and pulls his legs up on the couch. "Kris left, there’s not much more to say.”

 

            “Yes, there is, but you’re just not saying it,” she counters. “I’m your mom and I know it’s bothering you, so just tell me. I know you're are a grown up with his own business but, you’ll always be my baby.”

 

            She has a good point. “Everything was finally going so well, Mom. Kris and I were finally good, like an actual couple and it felt so good to actually have that, y’know?” She nods, encouraging Chanyeol to go on. “And then, I thought Baekhyun and I were on good terms again, but then he goes and he—” He takes a deep breath.

 

            Chanyeol's mother moves over and wraps her arms around her son. “It’s alright, you can say it.”

 

            “He did the most unforgivable thing he could have possibly ever done,” Chanyeol says after a couple minutes. “The ultimate betrayal and because of it, Kris' gone and no matter how many times I call, he never picks up. I have no idea where he is and I just… I miss him.”

 

            “I know, baby, I know.” She kisses the top of his head and rubs his arm. “What Baekhyun did is inexcusable, but it doesn’t mean that Kris won’t come back. I’m sure that in the time he’s spent with you, you’ve shown him a million different ways just how much you love him. He knows it, I know he does, so don’t give up just yet, okay love?”

 

            Chanyeol nods. “I wish I could just talk to him.”

 

            The next night, after Chanyeol decides to head to bed, he gets a phone call. The number is blocked, but he decides pick up anyway. “Hello?” he says into the receiver. There is no response, so Chanyeol says, “hello,” again. He’s met with silence, so he ends the call, turns out the lights, and goes to sleep.

 

 

 

THREE MONTHS GONE: FEBRUARY

 

 

 

            Ever see a couple that’s holding hands and being all cute? Did you want to throw sticks at them and make them go away because couples and being cute makes you want to throw up?

 

            Park Chanyeol can answer yes to both of these questions.

 

            Ever since Kris left, Chanyeol hasn’t been feeling the love in any way, shape, or form. He rolls his eyes at the sight of a happy couple and scowls when someone calls him on it. Chanyeol is bitter and he’s not hiding it. In fact, this is the very reason why Chanyeol is hosting a Valentine’s Day event at the Red Wave while all the other clubs have Valentine’s Day specials and whatnot.

 

            For this event, it is mandatory that anyone who comes must be wearing black; anyone wearing red or pink will not be allowed entrance. Kai has specific instructions to play any kind of music, but love songs because it defeats the purpose of the event. There is something different about the crowd in attendance this day, but Chanyeol figures it’s because the club is filled with people who either are bitter, like him, or just don’t give a .

 

            Lay takes a break when his side of the bar calms down. “I thought this would be more depressing, but it’s not all that bad.”

 

            “Thank you … I think,” Chanyeol says before handing a rum and coke to Kai.

 

            “It is a bit morbid, though,” Kai inputs. He raises his glass, takes a sip, and leaves to go back to the DJ booth.

 

            Lay nods. “Kai's right. This day is supposed to be about love and this is anything but that.”

 

            “That’s kinda the point, Lay.” Chanyeol is annoyed. Why can’t Kai and Lay just leave him alone?

 

            He raises his hands in surrender. “I just don’t want you beating yourself up for something that happened months ago. Everyone moves on at different paces, so I’m not forcing you into anything, just think about it.”

 

            Chanyeol nods. It’s been three months and it almost feels like Kris was never around in the first place. Like, it was just some strange dream that Chanyeol had that he finally woke up from. It feels this way until Chanyeol places his green toothbrush next to Kris' orange one, or when he sees the clothes he bought for Kris hanging in the closet.

 

            It’s weird to have someone around for a few months, and then, just like that, they’re gone in some ways, and not in others.

 

 

 

SIX MONTHS GONE: MAY

 

 

 

            The weather is finally starting to get warmer and Chanyeol is glad he can lose the coats and the scarves and the gloves. The warm weather means his mother will stop chastising him for not wearing socks and then yelling at him when he gets a little cold. The warm weather means he can regain the golden tone to his skin that so many people envy considering they live in Seoul.

 

            With a spontaneous decision, Chanyeol grabs his keys and takes off to the mall. His goal is get a few items of warmer clothing, but what he ends up with is unexpected. Chanyeol goes from store to store and by the end of his adventure, he practically has an entire new wardrobe. He justifies this as him embracing the change and he should have a more sophisticated wardrobe.

 

            On his drive back home, Chanyeol pulls into the complex of the best hair salon in town. As he is entering the shop, his phone rings, and without looking at the caller I.D., he picks up, “Hello?”

 

            There is silence on the other end.

 

            Chanyeol sighs before ending the call. Surprisingly, he does not have to wait at all before he is called to sit in one of the big, black chairs.

 

            “What can I do for you today?” the lady asks as she drapes a thin sheet around Chanyeol and ties it around his neck.

 

            He looks around at all the photos of people around the shop until he finds one he likes. “I want that,” he points at the picture.

 

            She smiles. “That I can do.” The lady sprays Chanyeol’s hair with water before picking up a comb and scissors.

 

            When he returns home, Chanyeol pulls all of his t-shirts and colorful pants off their hangers and throws them to the floor. He hangs his new clothes and takes a moment to look at who he used to be and who he is now. Every now and then, change is needed and Chanyeol deems this change as a good thing.

 

 

 

SEVEN MONTHS GONE: JUNE

 

 

 

            Chanyeol heads into work early to restock to the bar because if it doesn’t get done now, it won’t get done ever and he’ll have angry people down his throat all night. Although it’s almost been a year, Chanyeol still finds it weird to be in a club during daylight hours because it has a completely different vibe to it in the day time than night time. He’s not exactly sure how to explain it, but these days, Chanyeol enjoys the calmness the club brings when it’s just him there. No matter what, the Red Wave is the one constant in his life that won’t let him down.

 

            Just as Chanyeol places another empty crate on the ground, the front door opens and a strip of light shines in which makes him wonder who just came in. He scrunches his brow and he mentally goes through the list of people who might show up: Kai, Lay, maybe one of the bodyguards; however, the person who appears is not who Chanyeol expects at all.

 

            “Hey,” Chanyeol greets. “What brings you to the exciting before-hours of the Red Wave?”

 

            “Exciting, huh?” Tiffany chuckles. “I swung by your house, but you weren’t there, so I figured you were here. Too stalkerish of me?”

 

            “Not in the slightest,” he answers. Honestly, if he’s not home, he’s here and if he’s not here, he’s at home. Chanyeol leads a boring life and everyone knows it. “I’m assuming you were looking for me for a reason?” he questions.

 

            She nods. “Actually, yeah. Do you ever rent this place out for private events?”

 

            “I haven’t since no one’s ever asked me before and I wouldn’t know what to do if they did ask me. Why?” Chanyeol his brow to the side.

 

            “Well,” Tiffany starts as he slides onto one of the stools in front of the bar. “I was hoping I could have my reception here.”

 

            “What kind of reception?”

 

            “The wedding kind.”

 

            “I—” Chanyeol really doesn’t know what to say. He’s still not a fan of happy couples and he doesn’t think he’ll be able to handle all of the love that comes with a wedding. It will be too much and only remind him for God knows how many hours at how much his love life went to .

 

            Tiffany  senses Chanyeol's hesitation. “You don’t have to say anything now. The wedding’s not for another three months, but I just thought I’d ask. You don’t even have to say yes or anything. I won’t hold you to a neighbor obligation or anything.”

 

            A small smile appears on his lips. Tiffany really is a good person and maybe, just maybe, Chanyeol will put his own bitterness behind him for her. He almost laughs at the fact that Tiffany is getting married because Baekhyun had pushed so hard for him to date her. Right when Chanyeol open his mouth to tell Tiffany his decision, the front door opens once again and the person who walks through makes Chanyeol scowl. He looks straight at the intruder and very loudly, asks, “What the are you doing here?”

 

            He ignores the question as he walks over and wraps an arm around Tiffany. “Are you done here?”

 

            Chanueol takes in the sight of the two of them and he laughs humorlessly. “You’re getting married to him? You know what he did, right?”

 

            “Yeah, he told me everything,” Tiffany answers.

 

            “And you’re marrying him?” Chanyeol asks in disbelief. “Did he leave out the part where he ed my husband?”

 

            “Chanyeol—”

 

            “And how he basically made my husband believe that I didn’t love him?” He stresses my husband because that’s what Kris was, his husband.

 

            “Cha—”

 

            “No!” Chanyeol is outraged. “How the hell did this even happen?”

 

            Tiffany slides off the stool. “We ran into each one day and started talking and I don’t know, it just all kinda happened. Y’know the feeling you get when it’s just right? Yeah, well I got that with Baekhyun and I know it all seems so fast, but I really think—”

 

            “Stop,” Chanyeol cuts her off.

 

            “God, Chanyeol what the is your problem?” Baekhyun speaks up for the first time since he walked in.

 

            “My problem is you.” Chanyeol runs his hands over his face. “Just … leave. Both of you, just go. I have a lot to do before tonight and I just … I can’t do this right now. Please, just go.”

 

            Baekhyun and Tiffany leave without another word, and once they are gone, Chanyeol slides down to the floor and buries his head in his knees. Why is this my life, he asks himself.

 

 

 

EIGHT MONTHS GONE: JULY

 

 

 

            With a phone call to his mother (because if there’s one person who always knows what to do it is Chanyeol's mother), he makes a decision out of the kindness of his heart. Tiffany is ecstatic when he tells her he’ll gladly let her have her wedding reception at the club and with that, she drags Chanyeol into wedding planning hell.

 

            The doorbell sounds and Chanyeol externally groans. Because Tiffany will be using his space, she keeps asking him his opinion on how to set up the reception. Will this be too much? Do you think we could have an ice sculpture? Or, would it melt? How should the tables be set up? Would seating arrangements be a good idea?

 

            As Chanyeol makes his way down the stairs, his phone rings and he figures it’s one of the many places Tiffany has been talking to, so he picks up. “Hello?” There’s no response, so as he opens the front door for Tiffany, he ends the call. “How’s my bride-to-be?” he asks her.

 

            “Grab your planner,” Tiffany says, arms filled with magazines, books, and who knows what else. “We have some adjustments to make.”

 

            They walk into the kitchen and sit at the table. Chanyeol places his planner in front of him and asks, “What adjustments?”

 

            “The tables will be ready to pick up the same day as always, but the chairs, oh the ing chairs won’t be ready until two days after, as in the actual day of the wedding.”

 

            Chanyeol picks up a pen and opens the planner to the current week. He is about to flip to September, but he notices the day’s date and he freezes.

 

            “Hey, you alright?” Tiffany asks him.

 

            “Um …” He looks at the date again and he feels sadness all over. “Yeah, I’m sorry, I just …” Chanyeol shakes his head. “What about the chairs?”

 

            Tiffany goes on, but Chanyeol barely listens. This day, one year ago, is where it all began and so much has changed since then.

 

 

 

            About a week later, the doorbell rings and Chanyeol wants to cry. He really doesn’t want to listen to Tiffany rant on and on about the wedding. He gets it, she’s excited and it’s a stressful process, but honestly, he could care less about all of the details. Chanyeol opens the door, but it’s not Tiffany at the door; it’s a guy in a white dress shirt and black slacks holding a bouquet of yellow roses. The guy hands the flowers to Chanyeol and then leaves. Confused, Chanyeol closes the door and plucks the note out of the bouquet. "I’m sorry," it reads.

 

            For the next twenty minutes in two minute intervals, the doorbell keeps ringing and every time, the same guy appears with another bouquet of yellow roses and a note.

 

            Second time: I know what I did was wrong.

 

            Third time: I understand why you’re mad.

 

            Fourth time: Thanks for letting Tiffany have the reception at the club.

 

            Fifth time: I’m really sorry.

 

            Sixth time: I never meant to hurt you.

 

            Seventh time: I just want the best for you.

 

            Eighth time: I understand if you hate me.

 

            Ninth time: I’m really, really sorry.

 

            Tenth time: I don’t know what else to say other than sorry.

 

            Chanyeol is annoyed by the sixth time the doorbell rings, but he answers the door anyways. He is standing in a mess of dozens of roses and he knows who sent them. The doorbell rings for the eleventh time and Chanyeol mutters a, “For God’s sake,” before answering the door.

 

            The guy who has been delivering him the flowers hands him a single card before turning away and leaving. Chanyeol almost feels bad for the guy, but then he really doesn’t. He opens the card and it reads, "I can’t do this without you, please be my best man." Chanyeol closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. "God damn it," he says to himself.

 

 

 

TEN MONTHS GONE: SEPTEMBER

 

 

 

            Chanyeol stands up, fixing the jacket of his tux before tapping his spoon to his champagne glass to get everyone’s attention. When everyone is quiet and all eyes are on him, Chanyeol takes a breath. It’s now or never.

 

            “My job today is to embarrass this man right here in front of all of his friends and family and that is exactly what I plan to do,” Chanyeol begins. “I’ve known Baekhyun for so many years now that I’ve lost track of how long it’s been and in these years, Baekhyun has done plenty of questionable things, but what tops the list is how he asked me to be his best man. Now, everyone knows Baekhyun is a romantic at heart, so I asked Tiffany how he asked her to marry him. We all know the story, he took her on a double decker around the city and blah, blah. Yes, it was cute and awww, right?” The crowd laughs and nods. “But what you all don’t know is that this bloke sent ten dozen roses to my house with a damn card to ask me to be his best man.” Chanyeol turns to look at Baekhyun. “I’ve never felt so loved before in my life,” he says sarcastically, but in a friendly way.

 

            The crowd laughs again and Chanyeol knows he’s doing well. He turns back to the crowd. “This speech should have been really hard to write, but it wasn’t. It was quite easy considering how well I know Baekhyun now that I think about it.” One guy to the left really laughs, so Chanyeol points at him. “He knows what I’m talking about,” he says and it earns him lots of laughs. “For years now, I know I could always lean on Baekhyun when I need him. He’ll be the one to tell me to stop drinking so much, but then he’s the one who’s drinking so much.” More laughs.

 

“Baekhyun has always been the brother that I never had and even when it’s the best or the right thing to do, we do whatever we can to have each other’s back. And now, I’m stepping down from that role and handing it over to Tiffany. It’s crazy to think of how fast this all happened, but really, I couldn’t be happier for them. You guys make a great couple, Tiffany, you’re beautiful. Baekhyun, you’re not all that bad and I wish you guys the best.” Chanyeol raises his glass. “Cheers.” Everyone claps and there’s clinking of glasses all around.

 

            When Chanyeol sits down, he finds Baekhyun's eyes on him and when they meet, Baekhyun mouths, “Thank you” to him. Chanyeol smiles in return, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He may have been the bigger person and agreed to be Baekhyun's best man due to the history of their friendship, but Baekhyun will never be forgiven for what he did.

 

 

 

TWELVE MONTHS GONE: NOVEMBER

 

 

 

            “Delivery from Park Jay.”

 

            Chanyeol looks at the delivery guy in front of him with an open mouth. “Can you hold on for a minute, please?” The guy nods and Chanyeol walks a few meters away from him.

 

            He dials his mother’s number. “Hello Boo,” she picks up.

 

            “Mom, why is there a grand piano at my doorstep?” Chanyeol asks.

 

            “Just doing some Fall cleaning,” she answers. “Since you left, no one plays the piano and I have an idea for the room it was in since I’m redecorating and all, so I thought I’d send it over so you can play again.”

 

            Fall cleaning. Redecorating. Hmm… “That’s actually not a bad idea,” he tells his mom. “Thanks.”

 

            “I knew you’d love it.”

 

            He can hear the smile in her voice. “You always know everything, don’t you?”

 

            “Of course, I’m your mom!”

 

            Chanyeol chuckles. “Well, I better get the piano situated. I’ll call you later.”

 

            “Okay love, bye.”

 

            He ends the call and leads the delivery men to wheel the piano to the den that is never used. Once they leave, Chanyeol tries to figure out how to arrange this room now that it has a piano in it, but he ends up with a different idea instead.

 

            Two hours later, after a talk with a real estate agent, Chanyeol is hammering a For Sale sign into his front lawn. It’s time to move on. It’s been time to move on. Kris is not coming back and there’s no point for Chanyeol to sit around and wait for him any longer. It’s time.

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A/N: Ahhh yes. We have put a name to the infamous mother of Park Chanyeol :) This chapter is extremely emotional :'( for me at least