It was a wonder Jongin managed to stay alive for the long month of filming teasers. He attributed his newfound energy and determination to the fact that Kyungsoo was talking to him again.

 Each time he smiled at Jongin or laughed the way he used to when they were together, Jongin felt a rush of adrenaline, a tingling in his fingers, and a swell of emotions so strong he had to restrain himself from reaching out to grab Kyungsoo into a hug.

They still hadn’t really talked about their relationship but Jongin decided that simply being with Kyungsoo was enough for now. And although he found himself smiling like an idiot during practice, or messing up a take during filming because the director said he looked too ‘giddy’ when he was supposed look ‘fierce’, or when he simply sat in his room with Kyungsoo, a comfortable silence between them, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was still losing parts of Kyungsoo.

 It was a feeling he always tried to brush off, telling himself that time was necessary for Kyungsoo to fully come back to him, and he ignored the uncomfortable feeling in his gut, choosing to simply wait. Wait and hope for the best.

But whenever he told himself these things, there was one important thing he was forgetting: Joonmyeon.

“Kyungsoo!” Jongin heard an annoyingly familiar voice call out and he turned to see Joonmyeon walking toward them, the always bright and cheerful smile on his face.

Jongin inwardly rolled his eyes and turned back to Kyungsoo, only to feel something drop in his stomach when he saw an equally bright smile on the other’s face directed at the man who was now sitting down next to them.

“Hey, Jongin.” Joonmyeon said sweetly. Too sweetly, if you asked Jongin. He nodded his head in return, his eyes focused on the food in front of him.

“Did the managers talk to you?” Joonmyeon asked Kyungsoo.

“No. Why?”

“They pushed our schedule forward by a day. We start filming this afternoon.” Jongin’s head snapped up at these words and he glanced between the two of them hurriedly, a little confused and slightly panicked.

“We?” He asked, his eyes settling on Kyungsoo’s face.

Kyungsoo simply nodded. “Yeah, Joonmyeon and I are doing a teaser together.”

Joonmyeon began talking excitedly about the rest of the day, glad to finally be filming a teaser and Kyungsoo eagerly listened, nodding his head, his eyes bright and enthusiastic, oblivious to Jongin’s internal struggle that went on as the two of them talked.

It was unexplainable, the way Jongin’s dislike of Joonmyeon only seemed to grow. The man had never done anything specifically spiteful to him. He always smiled genuinely at Jongin, laughed at his jokes, complimented his dancing, even brought him water once, when he was practicing for long hours. But Jongin couldn’t help the bitter taste he got in his mouth whenever Joonmyeon was around.

He sipped at his water, trying to dispel it, and as he did so he glanced back and forth between Kyungsoo and Joonmyeon once more, his fingers curling involuntarily when he saw how beaming Kyungsoo was at that moment.

Jongin felt his whole body slump when he finally realized what the problem was. He was jealous.

He recalled the way Joonmyeon’s hand always seemed to linger on the small of Kyungsoo’s back too long, or the way when they first arrived at the company, they seemed to stick together all the time, whispering, talking, laughing.

Jongin felt himself longing to be able to do that with Kyungsoo again, to do more than that. He was close, so close, and yet, as he sat next to them, awkwardly moving his fork back and forth across his plate, he realized he was still far.

He wanted more, needed more from Kyungsoo but was too afraid to ask, knowing it would be moving too fast. He couldn’t jeopardize the fragile friendship they now had.

But each time Joonmyeon leaned in closer to Kyungsoo, Jongin felt as though he was being pulled back away from him.

He was caught in a decision of forcefully pushing his way into Kyungsoo’s heart once again, or letting himself be pulled out by the man chatting amiably next to him. He felt that either way he risked the chance of losing Kyungsoo and that was something he refused to let happen.

“Jongin?” Kyungsoo asked, and Jongin whipped his head up, his eyes meeting Kyungsoo’s confused ones.

“Hm?” He asked, setting his fork down and placing his shaky hands in his lap.

“Joonmyeon asked if you were done with all of your filming.”

“Oh. Uh, yeah, I am.” Jongin answered stiffly, only turning slightly toward Joonmyeon.

The conversation continued for ten painful minutes as Jongin answered a question here and there, his eyes focusing once again on the table in front of him.

The jealousy, no matter how hard he tried to suppress it, crept up on him every time Joonmyeon reached out to playfully hit Kyungsoo’s shoulder, or when Kyungsoo would smile, his eyes crinkling into crescents at something Joonmyeon had said.

He let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding when Joonmyeon stood up and walked away, a wave thrown to Jongin and Kyungsoo and of course, the bright smile still plastered on his face.

“Are you tired again today?” Kyungsoo asked, forcing Jongin to stop fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

“What? No.” He answered, wondering if he had seemed that way.

“You just didn’t talk much.” Kyungsoo answered before reaching out to lay the back of his hand against Jongin’s cheek. “Plus, you look really flushed.”

Jongin’s cheek felt as though it was suddenly on fire, the blood rushing to the spot just under Kyungsoo’s hand.

The soft, familiar touch brought back countless memories to Jongin’s mind, small touches, hand-holding, caresses, things that Jongin had been wondering lately if he would ever get back. The wave of contentment that swelled over him as Kyungsoo’s hand rested comfortably, carefully, on Jongin’s cheek was enough to snuff out the jealousy and replace it with the simple urge to reach out and lay his hand on top of Kyungsoo’s.

But as soon as it had come, the hand was gone and Kyungsoo swallowed loudly, looking sheepish for the unnecessary contact he had initiated.

“I have to go to practice.” He announced, standing up and awkwardly pushing his chair in. “Just, um, get some sleep.” And with no other word Kyungsoo left quickly, leaving Jongin to watch him go, his cheek still burning.

He stood up when Kyungsoo was gone, glancing around the cafeteria, remembering that he need to ask Sehun about the final run-through of their teaser. He spotted him across the room, the wide smile on his face an unfamiliar sight, and next to him was Luhan.

 Jongin shook his head, a small, knowing smile forming on his face as he walked in the opposite direction, choosing not to disturb Sehun, knowing that his younger friend would kill him if he burst in on his time with Luhan.

Over the past month Sehun and Luhan had become much closer to each other and Yixing and Jongin got endless entertainment out of it.

Luhan would drop by the practice room and each time Sehun would practically jump off of his feet, almost tripping, just to say an awkward “hi”.

Jongin figured it was only a matter of time before something more started to develop between the two of them. He didn’t miss the way Luhan would return Sehun’s awkward smiles, the small blushes, and shy glances.

If only Jongin’s love life was as simple and naïve as theirs.

It was almost eleven when Kyungsoo opened the dorm door, huffing and setting something large and black down onto the floor. Jongin sat up, ran a hand through his disheveled hair and eyed the thing curiously.

“What is that?’ He asked, swinging his legs off of the bed to face Kyungsoo.

“A kite. It’s for our teaser.” Kyungsoo replied, flopping down onto his bed and rolling over to face Jongin.

Jongin nodded, swallowing down all of the questions roiling around in his gut.

 He figured each of his questions would have answers he didn’t want to hear. Something along the lines of how wonderful it was to spend time with Joonmyeon and Jongin didn’t know if could handle hearing all the details of their day together. So instead he sat silently on his bed, hating himself for being so damn sensitive when it came to Kyungsoo.

He was startled when he felt a soft hand press into his cheek again and he looked up to see Kyungsoo standing in front of him, a concerned tilt in his eyebrows.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You’ve looked so unhappy all day.”

“I have?” Jongin asked, genuinely surprised. He had thought he had been hiding his unease and frustration well.

“Yeah. Is something wrong?” Kyungsoo questioned, leaning down to sit next to Jongin on the bed, his hand leaving his cheek to rest on the bed in between them.

Jongin noticed the genuine worry and curiosity in Kyungsoo’s face. The way he stared intently at him, looking for answers, and Jongin figured now seemed as good a time as any to ask what he had been dying to for the past month.

“Can we uh…talk?” He asked, his voice not hiding his trepidation well.

Kyungsoo seemed to immediately know what Jongin was referring to and he stiffened, scooting slightly away, looking as though he were ready to bolt.

“Jongin, I don’t think so. Not right now.” He made to stand up, but Jongin, as he always did, reached out to hold Kyungsoo down, his hand grasping his wrist. “Jongin-”

“You said we could talk.” Jongin reminded him fervently, remembering back to when Kyungsoo had made a promise. Jongin was simply cashing in on that promise.

“I know, but just…not now.” Kyungsoo said desperately and when he made to stand up again, Jongin, in a moment of panic and need, stood up with him.

 As he grasped Kyungsoo’s shoulders he whispered, “Fine, then we won’t talk.”

There was only a second for Kyungsoo to react before Jongin leaned in to connect their lips, his need making him impatient and insistent, a contrast to Kyungsoo, who stood shocked and stiff, his eyes wide and his hands hanging limply at his sides.

Kyungsoo gasped at the feel of hands on his waist, and Jongin took the opportunity to slide his tongue in, deepening the kiss. Kyungsoo momentarily stiffened once again, before his arms seemed to involuntarily snake around Jongin shoulders, his fingers tangling into Jongin's dark hair and their chests pushed together.

Through the lust and the need Jongin felt a reassurance and a happiness so strong that he shuddered, his hands grasping more tightly onto Kyungsoo, afraid that he would disappear at any moment.

But Jongin knew it was coming, he savored every last taste and feel, knowing it was only a matter of time, and as he predicted, the hands around his shoulders moved to his chest where they started pushing insistently, Kyungsoo’s lips moving against his own to form protests.

“Stop, Jongin, stop!” He cried and Jongin let him go, his arms falling to his sides as he took deep breaths.

“I’m sorry.” He breathed, taking a step forward in an effort to calm Kyungsoo down, but the latter took a frantic step back, putting his hand out to stop him.

“Don’t.” He stated harshly. “You can’t just…” He trailed off, looking down at the ground and reaching up a hand to his chest in an attempt to steady his breathing and rapid heartbeat.

“I need answers, Kyungsoo.” Jongin said pleadingly, his hands aching to reach out again.

“And that’s the way you choose to find them?” Kyungsoo asked incredulously.  “I need time to sort out my feelings. You can’t just kiss me like that.”

Jongin felt his heart skip a beat at Kyungsoo’s words. “So you’re saying you still have feelings?”

Kyungsoo faltered, his eyes widening slightly. “I never said that.” He stated shakily, his tone and the look in his eyes contradicting his words.

Jongin opened his mouth to protest but the question that had been on his mind all day spilled out instead. “Do you have feelings for Joonmyeon?” He asked quickly, his cheeks reddening.

“What?!” Kyungsoo was caught off guard and he spluttered. “No! Of course not, I-” But before he could finish, Jongin, out of relief and pure need, leaned in once again to connect their lips.

This time though, to Jongin’s surprise, Kyungsoo didn’t push him away.

~~OTL. Sorry this update took so long. I just started college so everyhting's been a little crazy but here you go! I made it longer than usual and hopefully you like it :)

Thanks to all my new subbers and for the comments <3