#2 Loving a Bad Boy - zeydiinara (Reviewer: BangingYongguk)

Flying Pig Review Shop *OPEN* *NOT HIRING*

 

Title (2/5)

The title sounds really boring and cliché. It would not appeal to me.

 

Appearance (5/5)

The poster looks really good. Background is recommended but I think it looks better without a background.

 

Description and Foreword (2/10)

After I read the description, I knew the entire plot already. At the end, Dara and Jiyong(GD) lives happily ever after. What a great oneshot. The foreword only has the poster credits. So, yeah... 

 

Plot/Flow (20/20)

The flow was really good. I understood what was happening. I wanted to cut points off b/c of the plot but since it's a oneshot, I'll let you off.

 

Originality (0/10)

Nothing surprising. I've seen many oneshots like this. You could of added more to it. Maybe even a twist.

 

Arrangement (5/5)

No comment.

 

Writing Style/ Neatness (5/5)

No comment.

 

Grammar/Spelling/Punctuation(20/30)

1) “What took you so long?” he asked.

    "What took you so long?" He asked.

2) He continued then, “…then we’re done.”

    He continued then, "Then we're done."

3) “So… you really like me?” he said after a while.

    "So... You really like me?" He said after a while.

4) “Even so, I can’t do it,” I said as I slapped his hand away and rubbed my painful cheek.

    "Even so, I can't do it!" I said as I slapped her hand away and rubbed my painful cheek.

5) I know he had a bad personality like everyone said so, but I firmly believe that he’s not that bad or that some kind of a story I have yet to know behind his personality.

    I knew he had a bad personality but I firmly believe that he isn't that bad.(The sentence is way to long and contains information the reader already knows. Therefore, I erased parts of it.)

R/N: There is similar mistakes in which I haven't pointed out. Please re-read the oneshot and fix them.

 

Enjoyment (10/10)

I enjoyed the oneshot despite the fact that I knew what was going to happen. Your writing style is very unique. Please, keep up the good work. P.S. Sorry for giving you such a low grade.

 

Total= 69/100

 
 
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imsozelo #1
Title: Holding Onto Gravity

Author: imsozelo

Story link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/422694/holding-onto-gravity-oneshot-zelo-jongup-bap-jonglo

Does your story contain : No

Reviewer: Kakurine039

Is English your first language: Nope. So please kindly point out my flaws! >_<

Password: seunghyunismine

Additional information: you can focus on my grammar mistakes but please tell me the negative sides of the storyline as well!
BangtanCheesecake #2
I want a review!
Title:
My Alien Boyfriend
Author:
kulkk1234

Story link:
http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/413715/
Does your story contain :
yes

Reviewer:
#2 BangingYongguk
Is English your first language:
nope
Password:
seunghyunismine
Additional information:

I mainly focus on so i wish to hear more comment on the sm ut :D
i submit my story for a review here before LOL it's called "my dad is your boss" it's my first fanfic, i hope my writing is better now o_o
Thank you so much! :) <3
LauraaGx #3
Chapter 6: Aw thank you, I'll fix my mistakes. <3
ThatOneOtherWriter #4
Title: My Brother's 'Brother'



Author: ThatOneOtherWriter



Story link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/190638/my-brother-s-brother-drama-korean-romance-seunghyun-siwon--yunho



Does your story contain : Not at this time.



Reviewer: BangingYongguk



Is English your first language: Yes



Password: seunghyunismine



Additional information: I'd like to know, most of all, if the pace isn't too slow and if my characterization isn't bad. It hadn't been updated in a while but I want to continue it, but not before I get s third-party, non-biased opinion on it.
Pab0Panda #5
Title: Love to be loved by you

Author:Pab0panda

Story Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/254162

Does your story contain : No

Reviewer: BangingYongguk

Is English your first language: No, it isn't

Password: seunghyunismine

Additional information:
kyouyas #6
Title: Aish! That Jung Daehyun!



Author: kpoplistener



Story link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/249776/aish-that-jung-daehyun-yongguk-zelo-jongup-bap-daehyun-youngjae-kimnamjoo



Does your story contain : no



Reviewer: any



Is English your first language: yes



Password: seunghyunismine



Additional information: Please focus on characterization, and please be nice :)
LauraaGx #7
Oh crap. I just noticed I messed up the application. Oops! Sorry if it caused any inconvenience. I'll do it again, this time the right way.

I want a review!



Title: When you fall, who will be there to catch you?



Author: LauraaGx



Story link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/234374/when-you-fall-who-will-be-there-to-catch-you-angst-bigbang-choiseunghyun-gdragon



Does your story contain : No.



Reviewer: Kakurine039



Is English your first language: No.



Password: seunghyunismine



Additional information: This is my first fan fic, and I wanted to know how I've been doing so far.
jiminniexmochi #8
I want to be a reviewer!

Username: KPopFan4Ever101

Profile link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/78089
Examples of reviews: I have my own review shop ---> http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/205632/ng--l--c-s----uls----------------------------n-apply-request-review-requestshop-reviewshop

Activeness: 8/10

Strictness: 3/10

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/Yuri: only

Specified chapters: I don't really care to be honest. But the more chapters, the longer you'll have to wait for a review. I'm a fast reader, though ^^

How many reviews can you do in a week: 25-30

Why do you want to become a reviewer: I enjoy reading very much. It opens my mind to let know what other people think about this and that.
Some words to say: Hello! I'm KPopFan4Ever101! As you can see, I can read any type of story but I only like /: I also have my own reviewshop. I'm very leany and I don't like being mean ^^;

Password: ReignOverTheFrostedHeavens
GPB_babyJaney #9
I want to be a reviewer!



Username: GPB_babyJaney



Profile link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/92093



Examples of reviews: n/a


Activeness: 8



Strictness: 9



: Yes



/Yuri: no



Specified chapters: 25-30



How many reviews can you do in a week: about 3 since i reread each chapter



Why do you want to become a reviewer: Honestly I'm very much into giving feedback since I'm not much of a silent person. I also like letting people know of what I think they should improve on.



Some words to say:
HI!!! I'm Faye, Kiseop's crazy wifeuu @_@ 11 years old in this random world @_@ I'm into reading fanfics and love to give feedback about stories read ^_^ Some of my reviews might be a bit hurtful but I promise I'm nice (alright not really sure if I'm nice xD)Each review will be having detailed points, the good points and bad points. Don't be afraid to approach me if there's something you want me to clear out for you :) IF YOU LOVE U-KISS, LET'S BE FRIENDS xD


Password: seunghyunismine
GPB_babyJaney #10
I want to apply but I don't have much time to fill up the form. and i also don't have any reviews posted as well but i really want to join!!!

author-nim, please wait for me ;AAA;
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