“Are you done?” Kris asked. I looked at my reflection in the antique mirror and nodded. My eyes were still red, swollen and teary as a waste of last night cry. A tear dropped, rolled down my right cheek. Kris was standing right behind me, wrapped his hands around my waist and stared at our reflection. He scented my long wavy hair and wiped my tears with his palm. “Don’t cry. Past is the past.” Kris said. He was emotionless. I was thinking of he ever feel so bad when his best friend died. I rested my head on his chest. “Gege, you look so handsome in black”, I said between sobs, looking at his reflection in the mirror. He barely smiled. Maybe I praised him in a wrong time.

Today, we were dressed in black. Someone has left my life. Someone who I love so much, I mean WE love so much has left us. I wrapped my arms around his left arms and let him led me to walk. He glare at me and smiled to comfort me. He handed out a handkerchief. “Wipe your tears. It’s not nice for a wife to cry after headed out from a room with his husband.” He whispered to my right ear and put a straight face. I nodded and wiped my tears off.

Kris opened the door and led me to his car. We made our way to a cemetery. We remained silent on that day. It is not the first time silence has filled our day since we got married last month. Kris has completely changed from a warm-hearted person to a cold person. He ate whatever I cook and had never complained, but he never TOUCHES me.

“Su-yee, it’s not that.. I.. don’t like you. It’s just.. I feel so awkward.. “he stared straight into my eyes. His orb and cold stare were mesmerizing which I like the most. My face fell due to his confession. He was awkward, so do I. It’s always awkward to marry a person who I didn’t love. I mean, LOVE.

He took me by the hand and we walked towards a grave. I looked up to search the sky. It was gloomy, sort of the add-ons to our emotions on that day. I tightened my grip to his arm, my lips trembled, longing for a calming kiss. Kris ducked his face and leaned to kiss me. I didn’t avoid him so his lips crashed onto mine. His lips were soft as ever. He tried to deepen the kiss, but I pulled away. “Gege, it’s not nice. Tao will get jealous.” I pouted and shrugged. “I don’t care” He snapped but he didn’t turn to kiss me.

We were in front of Tao’s grave. My dry eyes became wet again. I looked up to see Kris’s face. He was holding something behind his cold eyes. He caught my eyes and we exchanged look. “It’s time to do as what we promised, Su-yee.” He said seriously. There was no joke in his eyes. I was wondering he still could be so strong. It has been a month since Tao left us, and he still never and now his eyes were not teary. I nodded and he left as I moved forward.

I couldn’t stop my tears. For me, life is cruel, love is cruel. *Why must You took Tao? Do You love him so much that You have to make my life turned miserable? I loved him more than others could think of! And this is what I’ve got!* Mentally, I was bashing the fate. I kneeled down to the ground and keep calling his name. “Tao, you are the cruel moron! I still owe you some confession!” I shouted. Everyone eyed me including Kris. “Hey, Su-yee.” He squeezed my shoulders and helped me to stand up. He pulled me closer to his chest, and drown my face. I was crying my heart out in his chest, making his black shirt wet with my tears. I hit his chest lightly. “Su-yee, please stop. People are watching and it’s not nice to cry your eyes out. His family is eyeing you.” Kris tried to comfort me. I was back in my sanity. Kris pulled away and cupped my cheeks. “Su-yee, listen to me. We will come here after a month. I’ll take you here. And you can do whatever you want. Not in front of his family” He wiped my tears with both of his thumbs. “Can’t you see my lover died, you moron?! He’s your bestfriend!” I cried again. He hugged me tightly so I would keep quiet.

“Su-yee, remember to control your emotions.” Kris remarked from my back. I nodded lightly and stared at the gravestone. *No. I shouldn’t stare there* I thought. So I looked away from it.

“Yah.. Huang Zi Tao! You moron! ….You know, I still remember our first date. Do you still remember? No you don’t.” I glanced once at Kris at the back before I tried to continue.

“Tao gege ! It is so beautiful! It’s my first time to see this beauty!” I shouted as I spread my arms wide. Han River night view is just so amazingly beautiful. Tao chuckled at my reaction. He quickly wrapped his long strong arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder. “Su-yee, consider this as our first date. I want to be together with you, even on the most tiring day” He pulled me away and hugged me. I pulled away the hug and wrapped my arms around his neck and his arms were around my waist. His cute charming eyes and icy cold stare drown in my eyes. I couldn’t even catch my own heartbeats, they went too fast. “Tao, I love you”, I said, with my eyes were tearing up, touched by his endless love. He caressed my cheeks as he smiled sweetly. He leaned down and crashed his lips onto mine. I responded to the kiss as best as I could. It was my first kiss witnessed by the night view of Han River.

“Tao, remember when we first met? You were silly! I almost got hurt!” I rubbed my right arm. The memories of the first meeting between Tao and me shoved into my mind. My eyes started to tearing up.

Tao was really good in martial arts. He seemed so rough. I was taking part in wushu and had a friendly fight with him. He flew his kick and his kick slammed my arm as I tried to avoid him. I fell down rubbing my hurt arm. He gave his signature smirk and helped to get up. “Newbie, huh?” He said with his charming eyes gazing at my arm. I nodded slowly. “Hi, nice to meet you. I’m Huang Zi Tao. Just call me Tao” He held up his hand but he took it back as he saw my painful arm. “I’m Kway Su-Yee” I smiled as I introduced myself. He looked startled. “Wow you are Chinese but you are living in Seoul?” He led me to a backstage. Because it was only me and him were only Chinese in the Wushu class in Seoul, we were getting closer.