Under the Blossoms of Autumn

Description

“Why do you always wear that mask?” the little girl asked.

The boy lifted it slightly, allowing her to see the smile that had formed on his lips. “Because it allows me to be anybody.”

“Anybody?”

“Anybody,” he agreed. “Anybody you want me to be.”

Foreword

 

Inspired by the movie 蛍火の杜へ (Romaji: Hotarubi no Mori E). Throwing this out there because even though the plot is not entirely similar, the key premise remains the same.

Also writing it as an entry for the Just Smile AFF Writing Contest. Though the initial idea came from the above-listed movie, I'm structuring my actual story to fit picture prompt 2.

 

Warning: There won't be any idol stars in this story. I understand that this will substantially decrease the views/comments/subscribers/etc., given this site’s intended audience, but after giving it some thought, this is my final decision. Story-telling is about writing what's on your heart, right? I’d rather sacrifice popularity in order to write what I want to write, without having to conform to what other people would probably rather see. Though judging by the tag(s), if you’re still reading, you probably already knew this...

Note: For those familiar with anime and/or Japanese culture, I do use some commonly known Japanese terminology in this story. All the characters are Japanese, not Korean, so the tag isn’t completely random. All the same, if the words throw you off, feel free to let me know and I can write up a mini glossary or something.

Last point. Recently, I’ve been thinking about my story-telling style—though I tried to restrict myself to one POV in order to improve, sometimes I wonder if I’m doing it right. Among other goals, this story will also be an experiment for me, a chance to alter my narration so that it does not simply follow one character. I hope this is actually an improvement, and not a step backwards….I dunno, does this added mobility make my writing stronger or weaker?

With that said, if I haven’t already scared you off, I’d be honored if you still chose to give this story a chance. Comments and constructive criticism (especially if it addresses the aforementioned concern) will be extremely appreciated. Thanks for your interest.

[Update: many months later]: This is completely overdue, but I can't believe I actually won O_____O Thank you to everybody who's expressed an interest in this story, whether through commenting or subscribing. Ironically, the one story I thought wouldn't receive any attention is my most popular one. There is hope for me after all... 

Comments

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Tinywings
#1
Chapter 2: I decided to stalk around for fanfics of friends, and I found this one :) Decided to read it and I'm totally, completely impressed with this brilliant piece.

First of all, I really love the way you write. It's pleasant, soft, elegant, no sharp edges that would not fit in such a delicate storyline. Very brilliantly written, really, and the storyline is a beauty.

Of course, I wouldn't be me if I did not also had some feedback. Just to say, it's surely not because your piece was not good - because it certainly was - but as long as it is not flawless, I like to point out little something just so you can write more beautiful pieces in the future. Of course, this is only my opinion. Personally, I had a little bit of a hard time with all the japanese references and all, but that soon faded because the story did help with it. I was quite shocked when I realized Aki was only 6 when she first met Haru. Especially when I realized she was sick, which would make it a little weird to let her wander on her own. And the way she spoke when she a little older was too pretty in my eyes for a girl her age. Maybe I'm just pointing out irrelevant things right now, but I personally thought these were little things that could be considered. Of course, this is a story, so there needs to be some kind of occasion to meet someone and play around for this story to lead anywhere. Also, I do think shortness has its beauty, but this story had scenes that could be a little bit longer. Like in the beginning with their first meetings, things could have been described a little bit more carefully, just to create a more complete picture of it all. Then again, the way you did it was already very well, and maybe that would have unnecessarily dragged down the pace of the story. Diseases are always very sad to write about, and always risky in my eyes because writing about it really accurately and realistically is terribly hard. But the ending was perfect in my eyes.

Thank you for sharing~!
imperfections-
#2
Chapter 2: omfg.

my feels...
words can not describe ._.

your writing & the story itself is beautiful =')
corinneniix
#3
Chapter 2: This story is so beautiful!
Though there are some things I don't understand, I relate them and continue reading- this story is so beautiful that anyone who reads this would not close the window until he finishes reading it (that's what I did).
I hope Aki found her Haru.
Only managed to relate Haru and Kouki in the end.
I hope Aki's grandfather found the right answer, which was relating Aki's incident to Kouki's.
Thank you for writing such a beautiful story.
I luv u! <3 lol
redmotion
#4
Do you know that warm feeling you get after you've just read/experienced something amazing ? Your story is kind of giving me that vibe. I actually don't know how to put my feelings into words right now so I'm just going to say; THIS IS AMAZING. Times infinity. Times the expansion of the universe. LOL. And because of you, I am now also going to watch the anime ^^ BTW; congrats on winning the contest and thank you for the wonderful story :')
snsdobsessed
#5
Chapter 2: Thank you so much for writing such a beautiful story. I loved it, and it was so touching i cried.
Please continue to write beautifully!
glitteryy
#6
Chapter 2: Somehow, I felt it appropriate there were no idols in it. Aki, Haru, there's a good vibe, as how seeing I'm a frequent Japanese animated movie watcher. This was, in it's own special way, beautiful. Almost fragile, I would say. There's something really poigant to this piece, a story that has its own soul. I enjoyed it - very much. Very, very, much.
nalaboja
#7
@re: last 6 comments

whoa thank you so much for the comments! I didn't think the reception would be this good O___O reading these totally made my day, so once again, thank you >_< /bows
Myo1343
#8
I am crying right now...That was a great story, and you write really well. Now if you'll excuse me while I find my tissues...
MVP4Life #9
It's... so moving <33 I don't know how you do it, but the story is so fantastic!!!
youxme #10
<3 beautifully written. :)