Youngmin’s POV

I absolutely have no idea why I fell in love with this stupid brother of mine. I don’t know when did these feelings started to develop since it just came naturally. And I am aware that this is forbidden and impossible considering the fact that my twin is unquestionably straight. I don’t need to mention his past girlfriends as proof, do I? Anyway, as a rational brother, I had decided to keep this unrequited love of mine to myself and just be there for him because it’s the best that I can do to show how much I care about him. It’s a double torture for me because I can’t let my feelings out and I had to deal with his constant asking for lovelife advices.

Today, I had enough.

I thought that I was able to convince him to stop getting a girlfriend for a while (can’t he just stay put and be single even for just a month?!). Just recently, he had met this classmate of ours from middle school that he had been crushing on. I was even relieved when she transferred before Kwangmin could confess. However, he had just told me today that he’s planning to confess to her. Whatever! I’m so tired of feeling so hurt and helpless over this. What’s hurting me more is that whenever he would make me really happy with his sweet gestures, he would easily destroy that momentary happiness by doing something like this. I admit I was stupid for thinking his actions ever meant anything.

I woke up with my eyes feeling heavy and puffy. I guess I fell asleep while crying. Anyway, I won’t let this destroy my mood today. I’m going to set my feelings for Kwangmin aside starting from now on.

“Woah! Youngmin-hyung, you’re awake!” Minwoo had emerged from the doorway of our shared room. “I was going to wake you up. And what happened to your eyes? Did you cry last night?”

“Uhm…”

“You cried because of Kwangmin-hyung right?”

I have no idea how he knew about that but I feel so tired of keeping my feelings so I just nodded.  

“Kwangmin-hyung looks kind of down today too. Why are the twins fighting?” he asked like a kid.

“It…it was my fault. I got angry at him last night because I was really tired.” Tired of watching him fall over and over again to other people but not me, I added in my head.

“Is that so…” Minwoo’s voice didn’t sound convinced but maybe it was just my imagination. “Well, we need to be in the studio in an hour so get ready.”

“Alright, thanks Minwoo.”

Kwangmin and I never uttered a single word to each other from the dorm up to the studio. I could sense that Kwangmin kept glancing at me though. It seems he wants to apologize or something. I started to feel guilty about getting angry at him when he hasn’t really done anything wrong. It was just me and my stupid feelings.

The cold shoulder treatment is on for three days now. I can feel that we really both want to talk to each other but we have no idea how. We never had a fight like this before so I don’t know how to deal with it. The members kept pushing us to talk to each other but it’s impossible. I had also heard from Minwoo that he had confessed to Joomi sometime between those three days and she said she felt the same way too. I didn’t know what to feel.

Today was a busy day. We had two TV guestings and we had to rehearse another new added choreography to the original one. There’s no room for mistakes in this entertainment industry. I feel that the weeks of rigorous rehearsals and busy schedules are starting to get into me because I’m not feeling well today. However, I can’t let the members and the fans down so I just ignored the little dizziness and heaviness that I've been feeling since morning.

“Youngmin-ah, are you okay? You look pale,” Donghyun-hyung asked me when we were inside the vehicle on the way to the dance studio. Of course, the other members shifted their attention to me.

“I’m okay, just a little dizzy. I’ll just sleep this off and I’ll be fine. Wake me up when we’re there.”

Kwangmin’s POV

I had noticed since morning that Youngmin doesn’t look too well. I have this Youngmin-sensor you know. As much as I want to ask him if he’s okay, I still can’t approach him. When Donghyun-hyung mentioned this in the car, I was relieved because somebody finally noticed. However, what happened next was unexpected.

“You look uncomfortable in that position Youngmin-ah,” Donghyun-hyung said. “Do you want to sleep on my shoulder?”

“I can?” my twin asked like a puppy.

“Of course!” and to my shock, Donghyun-hyung gently placed Youngmin’s head on his shoulder. What in Pikachu’s name are they doing?! My twin has the ability to sleep soundly in any kind of position and he doesn’t need Donghyun-hyung’s shoulder!

“Uhm…Kwangmin…what are you glaring at?” Jungmin-hyung suddenly asked me.

“I wasn’t!”

“Yes you were! You look kind of scary.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about hyung.”

Jungmin-hyung, Hyunsung-hyung and Minwoo suddenly exchanged knowing looks and smirked together. Seriously, the members are so weird these days.

To my relief, we finally arrived which means Youngmin will not rest his head on Donghyun-hyung’s shoulder anymore. We went up the dance studio and my twin is walking really slowly. I know he’s a slow person but I can sense that something’s wrong. When we arrived, we immediately started practicing with our dance instructors.

We were in the middle of a dance routine when a loud thud was heard.

“Youngmin!” Donghyun-hyung suddenly shouted and they all run towards my twin who fell on the floor. “He’s burning!”

“Sorry hyung…” Youngmin said in a low voice but I was able to hear it. I know my twin hates it when he’s the cause of an interruption or mistake in the group. I wanted to hug him and tell him that he doesn’t have to be sorry but Donghyun-hyung was already carrying him out of the studio.

“It’s okay Youngmin,” Donghyun-hyung comforted him. “We’ll get you home okay?”

I hated the fact that it was Donghyun-hyung who run to Youngmin first, carried him and comforted him. And I hated the fact that I wasn’t the first person to be there when he needed me just like how he had been there when I needed him.

Our manager called a doctor to check on Youngmin. The doctor advised to let Youngmin rest for at least three days and let him take some vitamins, fever medicine and lots of healthy food.

“Since Youngmin won’t be able to work for three days, I’ll cancel some of your activities. Tomorrow, you won’t be having any schedule. The next days, you’ll just have to fill in for him. Rest for now okay? Donghyun, take care of Youngmin,” our manager said. Wait, did he just ask Donghyun-hyung instead of me, Youngmin’s twin?

 Donghyun-hyung asked Minwoo and I to sleep on their room for tonight so that Youngmin could rest well alone. He just left some water and medicine in the room in case Youngmin would need it. However, I couldn’t sleep that night. When the members were all completely asleep, I sneaked out of the room and went to Youngmin’s room. He’s asleep too. I went near the bed (which is my bed because he couldn’t possibly get on the upper bunk with his condition) and observed him for a while. My poor Youngmin…he must have been overworking himself and I didn’t even notice it. I changed the towel on his forehead and I caressed his hair gently to not wake him up. Unfortunately, he did.

“K-Kwangmin is that you?” his voice sounded really tired and hoarse.

“I didn’t mean to wake up, I’m sorry. Go back to sleep now.”

“I’m sorry for shouting at you the other day. I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s okay. I forgot about it already. I’m sorry for bothering you all the time too.”

“No…no, it’s fine. You’re not a bother. Please don’t stop coming to me when you need me okay?”

That’s my ever selfless twin. “You should really sleep now Youngmin. I don’t think your fever has gone down.”

“I don’t want to be alone.”

“I’ll watch over you.”

“You’ll get tired. Just…sleep with me.”

I suddenly felt my heart pounding so hard and fast against my chest, “I-I can?”

“Of course!”

He scooted a little and I slowly lay down beside him. We had often slept together when we were young but tonight just felt different. I felt like I shouldn’t be doing this but at the same time, I don’t want to be anywhere else in the world but here beside him. We were facing each other with neither of us saying a word for a few seconds.

“Youngmin-ah...”

“Hm?”

“Can I…can I hug you?”

I had expected him to reject me and kick me out of the bed but instead, he just moved his head close to my chest and tentatively placed his arm on my waist. I smiled as I placed my chin on top his head and hugged his body closer to mine.

I woke up from what seems to be one of the most wonderful sleeps I ever had. My twin is still caged in my arms and I can’t help but smile upon seeing his angel-looking face. I can feel that he’s still warm though which only tells me that he’s not fully healed yet.

“It seems that the twins had made up already.”

I looked towards the doorway and saw Minwoo smirking at our position. I gently let go of Youngmin and to my relief, he didn’t wake up.

“What are you doing here Minwoo?”

“What? It’s my room too! I just also wanted to tell you that you left your phone in the other room and it has been ringing thrice already,” he handed the phone to me.

“Oh, I see, thanks Minwoo.”

I asked Minwoo to change Youngmin’s towel then I head out of the room to check on my miss calls. It was Joomi. Curious on why she had been calling, I decided to call her back.

“Kwangmin-ah,”

“Joomi, why did you call?”

“Nothing…I just wanted to check on you because I miss you,”

I swallowed a lump on my throat and I don’t know why I suddenly felt awkward to talk to her. “Oh…uhm…well, I missed you too. Sorry for not answering your calls, I was sleeping.”

“Oh, I didn’t know! Sorry about that…I thought you had early schedules today.”

“Our schedules were cancelled today.”

“Really? Can we go on a date then?”

I wasn’t in the mood to go out today but I always make a promise to my girlfriends to take them out on a date whenever we both have free schedules.

“But…Youngmin is sick…”

“Really? What happened to him?”

“He has a fever.”

“Uhm…the other members are there right? I’m sure they’d take care of Youngmin. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t take care of your brother. I just wanted to go out with you because I know it would take weeks or even months before you’ll have another free schedule…”

Joomi sounded so down and I kind of pity her. I know that dating an idol is really hard and she had been understanding enough. Without much thinking, I decided to agree simply because I know I have to fulfill my responsibilities as a boyfriend too.

“Alright, let’s meet at the café near the convenience later at 1PM.”

“Okay! Thank you Kwangmin! And please tell Youngmin to get well soon.”

I hanged up and went to check on Youngmin. I saw that Donghyun-hyung had brought a soup and was in the middle of feeding him. I clutched my phone tightly in my hand and tried my best not to throw it towards our leader.

“Uhm…Donghyun-hyung…Youngmin, I’ll be going out later.”

Youngmin suddenly looked down and Donghyun-hyung gave me a questioning look. It’s like he didn’t expect me to leave when my twin is sick like this. Heck, I didn’t want to leave too! Especially after seeing Youngmin’s disappointed face. I was in the verge of changing my mind when Youngmin suddenly spoke.

“You’re going out with Joomi-ssi right?”

“Uhm…yeah…”

“It’s okay. You should use this free time to take her out.”

“But…you’re sick.”

“Don’t mind me. Donghyun-hyung’s here…and the other members too.”

“Are you sure Youngmin?” If he had said no, I wouldn’t have second thoughts and would cancel my date immediately.

“Y-Yes…” he gave a reassuring smile.

“Don’t worry about your brother. I’ll take care of him.” Donghyun-hyung smiled at Youngmin and my twin returned the smile too. I couldn’t take the sight so I just excused myself and prepared for my date.

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Thanks again for those who commented and subscribed TvT

I'm sorry if Kwangmin's kinda slow lol It's just he holds on to his belief that he is straight and falling in love with your own brother is impossible

let's just see how long he can keep that up ^^