Endless Lies

The bright sun seeped through your curtains. You didn’t know how you got on bed again. But as soon as you remember what had happened last night, you felt yourself clutching your chest. The pain was too much. You were pretty sure it wasn’t a dream. Why else would there be dried tears on your face right now?

You turned to your side, and glanced at the bedside clock. It’s past lunchtime already. You didn’t really feel like getting up. You dreaded the day that you’d lose Hyunseung again. You told yourself that once is enough. But twice would be too much.

You would stay on bed if not for your dry throat. You didn’t know how much you’ve cried last night. It was worse than Hyunseung suddenly leaving you without a word. Maybe because you understand why he had to leave you. But right now, you just couldn’t grasp why he have to cheat on you and moreover, lie to you.

You dragged yourself to the kitchen. You didn’t even bother washing up. You just want water. The crying drained you so much. Right now, you refused to think about anything else. You’ll decide what to do later, what to say to Hyunseung, whether you still want to hear his side, or his whole alibi, but then you’re just giving him an opportunity to feed you more lies. Maybe you just wanted to clarify with him what part of your relationship was on lies, and what part of it was true. At least you know which ones to keep with you forever.

“Hey,”

You stopped dead on your tracks. You were too preoccupied with your thoughts that you didn’t even notice someone was in front of you all along.

You stepped back in an instant when Hyunseung approached you.

Just seeing him makes your heart hurt again. He looks so…. Guilty. Regretful and sorry. There he was, in front of you, wearing that yellow apron that he’d always complain because it looks tacky. If it weren’t for you broken heart right now, you would’ve laugh at him, because after so many tries, you finally get him to wear that tacky apron. But no, you don’t think you could ever give him that smile again. Not after—

“Hey,” Hyunseung called your attention again, but this time, he was gently holding your arms. You felt a little surprised at how sudden he seemed to get closer to you.

Your instinct told you to just go back to your room and forget water!

“No, please. Don’t run away from me,” He said, as he pulled you to his chest despite your resistance.

“Let go, Hyunseung!” You wailed, pushing him away from you. Suddenly your home phone was ringing. Both you and Hyunseung stopped, as if the telephone was some kind of a bomb ready to explode any time.

As seconds passed, you felt relaxed under his arms. You almost wished he wouldn’t let go. Neither of you wanted to let go to answer to phone. You didn’t know why. But you just feel like maybe this is the last time.

Just then, the call was transferred to the answering machine.

It was Dongwoon.

“Noona, are you there? Hmm.. I was trying to call you and hyung, but I guess you two are still busy,”

You felt yourself reddened. W-What is Dongwoon thinking? You heard giggled and stifled laughter in the background.

“Noona, you didn’t forget about my birthday, did you? Did hyung tell you? Well, Doojoon hyung said to be safe, we can just celebrate my birthday here in the dorm. Hara will be here with Junhyung hyung too. And Doojoon’s girlfriend will be here too. And…”

He hesitated a bit. You know that in Beast members, the only ones who don’t have girlfriends are Dongwoon and Kikwang, and just a few weeks ago, Yoseob’s girlfriend went abroad to study.

“…well, I might bring someone, so I thought the more female in here, the better. So she won’t feel left out,”

You felt Hyunseung let out a low chuckle, you smiled too. Dongwoon is always the precious maknae.

“So you’ll come right? With Hyunseung hyung, of course.”

Realization dawned to you. Dongwoon’s birthday is 4 days from now. And right now, your relationship with Hyunseung is on the brink of breaking. How can you go there with him?

“And yeah, hyungs said you two should both get up now.”

Suddenly the reception was all blurred, as if someone was trying to grab the received from the maknae.

“YA! ARE YOU GUYS EVEN USING PROTECTION!!” Doojoon cackled yelled, followed by a bunch of cackles in the background.

“YAH!” You and Hyunseung both shouted, even though you both well know he won’t hear it. Without thinking, he released you and violently picked the phone up.

“YAH! YOU GUYS!” He shouted. You were honestly dumbstruck. Obvious, you and Hyunseung were in the middle of breaking up. And here are the other guys, teasing the hell out of you.

From where you were standing, you can even hear the snickering of the other members from the receiver.

“WHAT THE HELL!” He almost yelled. Then for a while, he glanced at you. You were guessing Dongwoon was asking where you were.

“She’s here beside me,” he only said. When he covered the mouthpiece with his hands, he turned to you, but his eyes lowered.

“He wanted to confirm if you’re still coming,” He said. He apparently knows that after what had happened, you’d want to distance yourself from him.

You slowly took the phone from his grasp and put them on your ear.

“Hello?”

“Noona! Hyung wasn’t too rough on you, right?”

You immediately turned red. Since when did they start making ual jokes to you? Hyunseung noticed this, so you immediately turned to your side, to avoid his intent stares.

“Y-yah. What are you talking about?” You replied. Dongwoon only laughed.

“Anyway, noona you’ll come right? We’ll prepare lots of food! And don’t worry, the dorm will be clean! Actually, we’ll just have dinner here, and then we might go out somewhere after. But you, we can’t really risk being seen in public.. so.. we’re still talking about it.”

You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you. You can go to the dinner. Since this is about Dongwoon, you’re going for him. You wonder if they watched the Strong Heart broadcast last night. Did they not know anything about it? If they did, they should know that there might be some tension between you and Hyunseung right now.

“Okay.” You said with a little smile. Hyunseung turned to you, a little surprised. He reached towards your waist, but you pushed him away.

“I’ll see you.” You said as you hung up. You sighed as you returned Hyunseung’s gaze.

“Let’s... talk.” You finally told him.

As expected, Hyunseung didn’t accept any of your decision. You wanted to break up with him, but he wouldn’t hear any of it. Then you asked for a cool off. At least keep distance from each other and work out your own feelings. He still wouldn’t have any of it. Because he knows cool off would later lead on to break up.

To be honest, you’re also hurting inside. For following days, you’d see programs and hear radios in which Hyuna will be in it, and all they talk about is her and Hyunseung. How is he going to fix it like he had told you, without making a fool of himself, or worse, hurting Hyuna and ruining their relationship as labelmates?

You were out that day to shop for Dongwoon’s birthday gift. Suddenly, you realized you didn’t know what kind of things he likes. Your first instinct told you to call Hyunseung and ask him. But you held back. You’re not in a relationship anymore. Or at least, to you. Hyunseung would still constantly text you, call you to remind you to eat on time, take your vitamins, and what not. In fact, he seems to be paying more attention to you.

You scanned your phonebook for an alternative help. Then you noticed Kikwang’s mobile number was stored. Hyunseung might have stored it when he was trying to call him using your phone.

“Hello?”

You cleared your throat. It felt weird calling Hyunseung’s members. But you really wanted to avoid him for the meantime.

“Hello, Kikwang-sshi? It’s me.” You told him.

“Oh,” He seemed to be a little surprised but he was answered your call pleasantly.

It was really a short but very helpful call. He told you lately Dongwoon is into different kinds of beanie. He also told you that if you really wanted to make Dongwoon happy, you just have to come to his birthday. You laughed and asked him if Dongwoon got Narsha’s latest photobook.

Gikwang gawked in excitement and said he’s been whining about that for weeks since he doesn’t have any time to go out and buy it. He said it’ll be perfect.

You seemed pleased at your purchase. But you’re not sure if you’re ready to see Hyunseung again for Dongwoon’s birthday.

You sighed. You’ll have the rest of the night and tomorrow to sort out your feelings.

You just brushed your teeth and was about to go to bed when someone was at your door. Sighing, thinking it must be your teenage girl neighbour again, and asking to borrow your Beast DVD collection, you opened the door without checking the intercom.

“Ya!” You felt yourself jumped. There he was, Hyunseung, with all those big bags that looked like he was moving inside your apartment.

He leaned towards you and gave you a kiss on the lips, like he’d always do when you meet with him. It shocked you for a moment, but when he started heaving his bags inside your apartment, you snapped out of your trance.

“Jang Hyunseung! What are you doing?!” You hissed at him. You can no longer afford to scream at him, not after you found out that your teenage neighbour is a diehard fan of Beast. You found that out because that day when Hyunseung went home, heartbroken, but still hasn’t given up, your neighbour knocked on your door and asked if that was your boyfriend coming out of your apartment.

You said he was. The highschool girl didn’t even notice your bloodshot eyes from crying, and immediately squealed at how Beast’s Hyunseung resembled him. You were dumbstruck, but nevertheless relieved that she didn’t think it was really him.

“Yah, I’m talking to you, what’s the meaning of this?” You said, but not before you securely locked your front door.

“I’m going to live her for a while.” He said, looking up to you with a smile.

“W-Wha---“

You were obviously appalled. He’s being too much. You wanted alone time to think for yourself, you wanted time to really clear things out, for him to think what he had done wrong, and for you to think what right decision to make: whether to really give him a chance or just…. Really called it quits.

“Jang Hyunseung, you need to get back to your dorm, right now!” You told him sternly, pointing at the door.

“Ohhh. I’m so hungry,” He suddenly moaned and dropped his lean body on your couch. He was clutching his stomach, and looked like he was in real pain because of hunger.

“You haven’t eaten yet? I’ll reheat you some food,” You automatically said, momentarily forgetting that you’re trying to make her leave.

Minutes have passed, and you ended up cooking his favourite food, Kimchi Stew and a lot of other side dishes. You know that they seldom eat on time, and he must be really starving. You wanted to kick yourself for still caring so much. A right amount of caring is fine, but right now, you---

“YAH!” You suddenly heard this Prince Jang’s shrill voice from your bedroom.

“What the—“

There he was, on your bedroom door, with both hands on his hips, a frown on his perfectly handsome face and a raised eyebrow.

“What?” You asked defensively.

“Why is the room in mess?” He demanded, he scooped a handful of your unwashed clothes on the floor and flung them out to the hallway.

“Hey!” You ran to it and scooped them up. Sure you were neglecting cleaning and keeping your things in proper places since thinking kept your time and energy most of the time.

“Hyunseung, what are you do---“ You stopped when he glared at you while he was de-cluttering your dresser.

You watched him for a while, as he moved around your bedroom to pick things up or to fold some clean clothes up, while muttering incoherent words to him. You softened at the sight. Hyunseung is always known as the clean freak. Well, as long as his things are in order, he’s happy. He’ll rarely care for the others. Of course, you’re the only person he cares about, so without actually telling you, he considers whatever things you have as his own, he also felt responsible towards them.

“Hyunseung,” You called him again, this time more softly. When he didn’t seem to hear you, you walked cautiously towards him and touched his arm.

“The food’s ready. It’s time to eat,” you said. He stopped his movement and turned to you. You gulped at how intently he looked through your eyes, as if searching something in them.

What you felt like the longest time, his gaze on you relaxed and put on a sad smile.

“You don’t really want me in your life anymore?” He asked quietly, his voice sounded so soft and sad. You choked on your own voice.

“I-It’s—“

He sighed and pulled you gently towards his chest. You listened quietly to his breathing, while he rests his chin on top of your head.

“I really love you. I really do. I don’t think I can live without you.” He whispered. You felt yourself clutching on the back of his shirt. Maybe… Maybe you should risk again. Maybe you shouldn’t be selfish and offer whatever’s left from your broken heart to him. Maybe this time, he won’t be feeding you lies anymore.

He ate in silence, which is very out of ordinary for him. He’d always manage to find things to say, whether to tease you about your cooking, or to talk about his schedule for the day, or to comment on anything about you. There was even one time you two discussed what came first, the chicken or the egg.

“Water,” You quietly said, as you nudged the glass of water towards him. He nodded and smiled a little at you.

“You should eat too,” He suddenly said as he reached over the table to feed you a spoonful of rice.

“No, really. I’m fine. I brushed my teeth already.” You declined, shaking your palms out at him. He looked hurt at your rejection and continued eating quietly. It’s starting to unnerve you and you sighed.

The seconds that happened next were all a blur. You stood up so abruptly, surprising him. You walked around the table until you were standing beside him, stoop down a little, snatch the spoon from his hand and forced it on your throat.

If he wanted you to eat, then fine, you’ll eat. You just…. You just don’t want to see that dejected look on his face again.

For a few seconds, he only looked at you, shocked, but when neither of you know what to do next, he wrapped his arms around your waist and guided you towards him and made you sit on his lap as he snuggled on your neck. It just.. felt so right. And the next thing you did: You cried and bawled your eyes out on his shoulders.

You were lying down on your side, exhausted from so much crying. Inches from your face, was Hyunseung’s, and he was holding your hands tenderly while rubbing a patch of your skin with this thumb. He still didn’t know where he stand, but he guessed it was a good sign. Since you let him hold you again without protesting so much.

“I broke off with Hyuna already,” He said quietly. You raised your eyes to meet his. But he was looking down, ashamed of even starting something with his co-label.

“You didn’t have to,” You started saying, but your voice croaked at the end. He looked up at you, frowning a little, also a little hurt.

“You didn’t have to, if you didn’t want to.” You said quietly. You felt a little hurt that he seemed disappointed that he has to break off with Hyuna.

“Ya,” He said, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ears. “That’s not what I meant,”

“I’m sorry I cheated on you. I’m sorry I keep on lying to you,” He said. “But everything I feel for you is real. And… I won’t even offer any explanation why I cheated, because I don’t think there’s a valid reason for doing it,”

You heaved a sigh and looked away. He scooted closer and extended his left arm and tucked them under your head, so he can get closer to you.

“But I’m really sorry. And I will really never look at anyone again.” He said as he pressed his lips on your forehead. He’d apologized so many times to you, and you were sure you’ve forgiven him already, but you were not quite ready yet to forget.

Finally, sleep was seeping through your system. Just when you were about to close your eyes, you felt Hyunseung kissed your eyes.

“Goodnight, my princess.”

You didn’t know whether to be happy or what. Seems like Hyunseung is being serious about living in your apartment. You asked him why and you only got a shrug and a smug smile. You asked him up to when he will stay and you only got another smug smile and a “as long as I like,”

Again, your apartment was spotless clean. He didn’t have any schedule and the two of you spend the whole morning cleaning your apartment, something he’d never do back in the dorm. He claimed he didn’t want unwanted surprises.

By the time you need to go to Dongwoon’s birthday, you were fretting because you couldn’t find your purse.

“You left it on the couch, jagi,” Hyunseung casually said as he did a final touch on his hair. He was casually complaining the need to dress up when it’s only Dongwoon’s birthday. You guys could even celebrate it in boxers and oversized old tattered T-shirts.

You didn’t know why, but when he called you again using words of endearment, you can’t help feeling those weird fluttering of butterflies inside your stomach. He had called you jagiya, or even yeobo a lot of times, but dressing up with him in your room, preparing together to go somewhere felt so different to you.

Is this what it feels like when we get married? You asked yourself, oblivious to your biting of your nails.

“What are you doing,” He suddenly asked, gently pulling your hands to keep you from biting any further.

“You messed up you lipstick,” He said, frowning, before he clucked his tongue in disapproval and disappeared to the couch to get your purse. In silence, he fished your lipstick from it and with most utter care; he swiped them carefully on your lips.

“There,” He smiled as he put the cap back.

“T-thanks.” You muttered. What just happened?

“Let’s go.”

“Noona! Hyung!” Dongwoon threw his arms around you. You were quite surprised to see him and Doojoon in their casual clothes. Kikwang was setting up their living room. Just behind you, Junhyung and Hara arrived.

“Hello,” Hara greeted you and the others. You’ve met Hara once, and you’re not sure if she remembers you. You weren’t exactly comfortable with her, because you’ve watched her once or twice and she’s always trying to pair up her co-member Nicole Jung to Hyunseung a lot of times in variety shows.

You bowed in response and felt more awkward than ever when Junhyung pulled you in a friendly hug. Apparently, it’s not every day that Hara see her boyfriend friendly and touchy with another female aside from her.

Good thing Kikwang grabbed you away from them and asks the others to settle quickly so you could all eat. You craned your neck to find Hyunseung, only to find him casually talking to a very familiar looking girl Dongwoon was with in the kitchen, preparing food.

“Oh yeah, Yoon Bomi.” Gikwang told you, motioning towards the girl. “From A Pink. I don’t know if you’ve heard of them.”

“Ah, yeah,” You suddenly remembered that one time Hyunseung was wrestling with you for the TV’s remote control because he wanted to watch this new show because Apink will be there.

“Ah, yes I think I’ve seen them before. No wonder she looks familiar,” You giggled. Gikwang’s company wasn’t so bad. What you didn’t know, Hyunseung had let you on your own for a while. He didn’t really want to suffocate you by hovering over you all the time. So he let you talk with the other members throughout the night. You were seated between Gikwang and Yoseob, who were happily striking conversation with you.

Hyunseung was keeping Bomi entertained, which you have no problem with. Doojoon and his girlfriend are all keeping up with everyone’s conversation, while Junhyung and Hara were in their own world, giggling from time to time themselves, but you can’t help noticing them glancing at you and Hyunseung.

Suddenly you felt Junhyung lightly kicking your feet under the table. Aside from Hyunseung, Junhyung is the closest member to you. Maybe because when they debuted, Hyunseung aside, Junhyung was your favourite member. And when he met you through Hyunseung, he was really pleased with your affection towards him.

He raised an eyebrow at you, which you replied with a confused look. He nods his head towards Hyunseung, as if asking why you two were separated. You rolled your eyes playfully and shook your head as if saying its okay.

Hara quietly asked Junhyung if there’s something wrong with you and Hyunseung, which he replied he doesn’t have any idea. In the back of his mind, he might have a slight idea, but he’s not really sure. But that didn’t make him warily looked at you and Kikwang’s direction. He knows that Kikwang has this little crush on you ever since, but he kept it to himself because you’re Hyunseung’s girlfriend.

Junhyung scoffed inwardly. Hyunseung would always be jealous as hell towards Junhyung because he knows you like him too, but he doesn’t know Kikwang’s feelings for you.

Soon, Dongwoon declared he wanted to go to Noraebang.

“You guys, please! It’s been a long time since we played in a karaoke house!” He said, doing those puppy eyes. Bomi squealed at him while the hyungs face palmed at their maknae.

“Yes! We could sneak out, since it’ll all be dark already.” Yoseob said excitedly.

“Hyung, you go drive!” Dongwoon told Yoseob playfully. “Besides we all want to cuddle in the backseat.” He cackled.

Kikwang made a face at the maknae. “Ya! You think Yoseob don’t want to cuddle with me?!” He joked with sent everyone in a fit of laughter because he just has to say it with a straight face. Yoseob smack the back of his head.

“Erm.. you guys, you go ahead. I need to lea---,” You whispered towards Kikwang. You don’t really want to ruin the happy mood.

“What, no! Come with us!” He said, holding on to your arm. Hyunseung immediately turned his head towards you and Kikwang.

“It’ll be really fun,” he told you with a smile.

Junhyung called your attention. “Who will Hyunseung cuddle with?” He smirked. You kicked him back under the table.

“Ow!” He laughed.

Dongwoon just has to cling on you and put on his best aegyo face on you for you to give in. You just can’t resist this maknae.

“If you don’t want to cuddle with hyung, and then let him drive and cuddle with me,” Yoseob joked as he put on his best aegyo face at you. Kikwang pulled you away from him, just in time Hyunseung sat between you and Yoseob and playfully pushed his face from you.

Hyunseung s his arms around your waist possessively and put on a smug face.

You sighed. It’s really going to be a long night.

Noraebang was surprisingly a lot of fun. You’re not much of a singer; you’re more of a dancer. So you don’t really go out to karaoke shops that often. Everyone was crazy! Good thing the noraebang place owner was a friend of Kikwang’s mother, so their security and privacy was really very tight.

As hours passed, everyone was crazier than ever. Yoseob was so hyper he’s starting to bounce around the room; Kikwang was already so drunk, he’s sputtering words that no one can understand; Dongwoon was already dead on the couch while Bomi was brushing his hair affectionately on her lap while she continuously engaged on a drinking battle with Doojoon and his girlfriend; Hyunseung too was already drunk, but still sane enough to be talked with, and together with Yoseob, they’re having their mini concert for everyone; Junhyung and Hara were all the same drunk, but not too much. They take turn teasing and provoking Kikwang in doing something stupid. Meanwhile, on the side, you had enough liquor in your system to get you unstable when you stand, but not enough to totally knock you off. So you were trying to help Kikwang all the while. You didn’t think Hyunseung would mind so much because he’s having the time of his life with Yoseob.

Suddenly, there was a knock from their door.

“Excuse me, another VIP guests just walked in, and they were requesting if you guys wanted to join rooms.” The head receptionist said.

“Who?” Doojoon asked.

But before the head receptionist even answer, a group of 5 girls barged inside.

“Surprise! We are 4 minute!” They playfully introduced themselves.

“Hey you guys!” Yoseob exclaimed. You were frozen on the spot. Seeing the other’s reaction, you almost confirmed who were the ones who have known about that ‘Strong Heart’ incident: You, Kikwang, Doojoon and his girlfriend. They worriedly glanced at you; even Kikwang who was already tipsy straightened to put his hand behind you for support.

Yoseob was apparently too drunk to remember what had happened in the broadcast despite being there in the studio when it happened.

Junhyung, Hara, Bomi and Yoseob were the only ones who are truly excited to be with the newcomers. Even Dongwoon who tried his best to open his eyes to respond to their happy birthday greetings. Doojoon, his girlfriend, Kikwang and you, on the other hand, tried your best to be polite with them.

“Oppa~” Hyuna immediately ran towards the shocked Hyunseung and threw her arms around his neck and boldly kissed him on the lips. The 4minute girls didn’t really know about you and your relationship with Hyunseung, so you tried your best to tell yourself that it’s not their fault. But then, whose fault is it? Hyunseung?

Your thoughts were interrupted when Kikwang gripped your hand tightly against his. Even Junhyung and Hara were now looking at you with worries on their faces. You smiled at them, trying to act like it was nothing. Besides, Hyunseung had said he had broken off with Hyuna, right?

You were trying your best to mingle with the other 4minute girls, since they seemed really nice and friendly, and just try to avoid Hyunseung and Hyuna’s direction. So Hyuna kissed him, but that doesn’t mean he wanted it, right? Right?

“Oppa, I missed you~ you didn’t call me last night!” Hyuna suddenly whined. Despite Yoseob’s loud screaming over the microphone, you perked up. Last night? Last night, he was with you. Last night, he told you he….

“You said the other day you’ll take me out on a date again. Oppa~ let’s go to that beach again,” Hyuna pouted, obviously it doesn’t sound to you that he had broke off with her yet.

“I-I….”

You really can’t take it anymore.

“I’ll just go to the ladies’ room,” you told Kikwang, Junhyung, Hara and Jihyun, who just joined your side of the table.

Junhyung called your name. You turned around, clumsily grabbed that one beer bottle and poured all the contents down your throat in one shot. You saw Doojoon, his girlfriend and Bomi looked at you in shock. But you tried your best to keep that stupid smile on your face. You need to get out of there, fast.

You grabbed your purse and tried to push that swirling feeling out of your system. You’re not sure anymore if it’s from the alcohol or from the pain of knowing Hyunseung had lied to you again.

What were you thinking? Of course... of course he can never let go of her. Why would he even chose you over Hyuna? She’s friggin every male population’s fantasy. She’s a goddess. What are you even to him in the first place?

You stumbled out of the place and wobbly walked around the area to hail a cab.

“ you Jang Hyunseung! you!” you cursed through your gritted teeth and angry tears. Is your heart really that much of a joke to him?

Just before you board the cab, a hand gripped your arm tightly.

Hyunseung.

“Don’t touch me!” You yelled at him, trying to free your arm off him. “Don’t ever touch me again!”

He called your name again, pleading and desperately.

“No, no, please listen to me,” He tried to hold up down when you keep on struggling and flailing your arms wildly to free yourself from him.

“I hate you Hyunseung. I can’t believe I fell for your lies again. I hate you!” You didn’t care if you were a mess right now. You didn’t care if the cab driver just saw you and Hyunseung’s shameful drama stunt; you raised your hand and with all your remaining strength, slapped him hard. You know it’ll mark his face tomorrow, and you know how pissed he’ll get because his face is one of the most important factors of his source of living.

You were equally stunned for a second at how he didn’t dodge your hand, when he could’ve easily done it.

“I’m sorry…” He pleaded, “I’m really sorry,” He whimpered. He’s desperately pleading and crying now with you, but your humiliation and pain blinded you.

“Go away.” You pushed him but he wouldn’t let go of your wrist.

“Aren’t you getting in?” The cab driver called you obviously pissed at the drama he’s witnessing right now. “Mister, if you don’t let her go right now, I’ll call the police.”

You gave Hyunseung another angry glare and tug your arm hard from him and boarded the cab.

“Y-yah!” He slammed his hands on the window. “YAH!!!”

You buried your face on your palms and cried.

You swore you’ll never go back to him again.

Hyunseung fell on his knees.

What have I done… He cried on his palms. He wanted to kick himself for being a jerk. He did try to break it off with Hyuna, but she thought he was joking with her. And he didn’t really make himself clear about seriously breaking up with her.

“Dude, I swear, get a grip of yourself. She doesn’t deserve any of your crap. Treat her right or someone else will,” Junhyung gave a pat on Hyunseung’s shoulder.

They were all driving silently back to the dorm. Kikwang was too furious with Hyunseung that he was fully sober even before they reached home.

The 4minute girls did noticed your absence, but Junhyung told them that you went home because you weren’t feeling well.

Hyunseung was back in their dorm, trying to sort out his thoughts. He ed up again. Big time.

“Lee Kikwang!” He heard Junhyung called from the outside.

“Where are you going?!” He demanded.

Hyunseung wanted to shut everything out right now. He lied down on his bed and covered his head with a pillow.

“I’m going to see her! Hyung she needed someone right now!” Kikwang argued.

“This is not the time—“

“Then when is it?!” Kikwang yelled, completely frustrated and angry towards Hyunseung, whose attention was now caught at the commotion.

“How sure are you that it’s you that she wanted to see and not him?” Junhyung rubbed the side of his head in stress. Kikwang is being difficult right now; only the two of them knows what he really feels towards you, and they swore to keep it hidden for the sake of their brotherhood.

“He keeps on hurting her! I just cannot sit and watch anymore!” Kikwang yelled.

“Treat her right or someone else will”

Hyunseung stepped out of the room and faced the two. Kikwang returned his cold and hard glare, as if daring him to say something. Hyunseung never realized his dongsaeng’s feelings towards you. But instead of feeling angry towards him, he felt remorse and shame.

“I’m going now to check on her,” he only said.

“No!” Kikwang held him back. “You can’t hurt her again!”

“Kikwang!” Junhyung raised his voice.

“I—“ Hyunseung turned to the younger one. “I’m not going to hurt her anymore.”

But Kikwang wouldn’t let go.

“Just leave her if you can’t treat her right!” He spat out. “She deserves better than you! You keep on making a fool out of her! If she can’t forget about you, I’ll make her!”

Hyunseung gritted his teeth and grabbed Kikwang’s collar. Despite the younger one’s more built body, Hyunseung wasn’t scared. But he knew that everything Kikwang had said was true.

“Hyunseung,” Junhyung plead as he tried to get between the two.

He slowly released Kikwang and without any other word, he briskly walked out of their dorm.

You didn’t bother changing your clothes nor washing your face when you hit your bed. You buried your face in a pillow and cried as much as you wanted to.

You wanted to curse Hyunseung so much. He had stepped on whatever piece left of heart. He’s a jerk, a very awful jerk.

You felt another migraine coming when you tried to think about the sweet and heart warming actions and words he told you. You feel nauseous at the thought of how easily you fell for them but in reality they were all empty words and actions.

“I hate you, you jerk. I hate you….”

Hyunseung sneaked inside your apartment and found you dead beat on the bed. He seriously wanted to beat the crap out of himself for being the biggest jerk alive. He didn’t even want to look at the mirror, because he knows he’ll only see a monster.

He sat down gently at the side of your bed and carefully tucked you in. He’d been making you cry so much that even his heart won’t forgive him for all the things he had done to you.

“I’m really sorry,” he whispered as he leaned towards you to kiss your forehead. You grunted a little in your sleep when you felt a single drop of tear fell on the side of your cheeks.

You felt vibrations underneath you. Also, your neck seemed to be in an awkward position that you couldn’t even move it so much without hurting them.

You groaned when you felt your body jolt.

What the heck? You thought. Why do you feel like you’re moving? You wanted to sleep more and felt the blanket around you. When you held a grip on it, you sighed, contented and snuggled in it.

But then, you couldn’t stretch your legs the way you wanted to them. You were in a fetal position for how many hours already that you couldn’t move, just like how you couldn’t straighten your neck.

You slowly opened your eyes.

You blinked once, twice.

Everything was pitch black. But you could hear someone humming a song gently.

Panic started creeping up you, but then you senses came to you and reached towards your eyes. You violently tugged the stupid sleeping mask that covered your eyes.

The sudden light almost blinded you. As you waited for your eyes to adjust to the light, you were quite positive that you’re in a moving vehicle. But how—

“Good morning,”

You turned to your left. And there he was, smiling at you his million won worth smile. The person you dreaded seeing the most. The person you grew to hate overnight. The person who, despite the hate, still manages to make your heart leap in miles.

Jang Hyunseung.

“Had a good sleep, babe?”

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Author's Note: eeeeeeeeeep :) Sorry for the sad chapter again. But I'll give you Bounce Hyunseungie <3I promised a feel good prince Jang, right? so.. yeah :3 Please wait for the 2nd part ^^

Erm.. Just out of curiosity. You guys are all up for a little ? Nothing too graphical or...erm. if you know what i mean XD Tell me if someone doesn't want , then I won't include it. ^^

So... so.. comments guiseeee pleaseeee :D