Days passed between Amber and Krystal, as said, they kept distance from one another. If they meet, they greet each other, and then nothing more follows that.

Amber focused more on studying and attending dance classes, she kept herself occupied, at least to lessen the times she’ll remember Krystal.

Tiring it could be but it was the only possible thing she can do, for now.

It was hard, she don’t know how to play this kind of situation, mostly because there is no “Krystal” who will be there consoling her.

This time she had no one to lean on to, not even her family, because most of people treat homouality as a sin.

Before, the personality of Amber was a paper spilled with vibrant colors; the temporary separation of the two affected that.

Now, she’s a paper with nothingness, she’s far from the usual. Well, no one could notice that. She kept everything to herself.

She bottled up her troubles and showed others that there’s nothing wrong. Her smile, her jolliness they were all lies.

On the other hand, Krystal can’t focus on anything. There’s something bothering her. These days, she’s been spacing out a lot.

Atop, Krystal found it hard to raise her points on Mathematics because there was no one to help her to understand the formulas and processes.

She could approach Amber anytime if she wants, but she didn’t.

There was an invisible barrier between them, separating them, making them feel that one another didn’t exist.

She needed Amber; not because of crappy Math problems. She needs Amber because she’s the only person she trusts, people swoon over her, offering friendship but none of them were true.

Amber is a part of Krystal, for Krystal, Amber is the definition of a true friend, Amber is Krystal’s protector.

She needs Amber but she acts like she doesn’t, for her it’s a sign of weakness if she’ll beg for Amber to stop this kind of act.

It’s been already three days that this invisible barrier had separated them, three painful days for the both of them.

The two were helpless without each other, and Jessica knows that, for it was so obvious from how Krystal acts.

Truth to be told, Jessica isn’t really like a sisterly figure; she’s more like the one who’ll play around and act cool. But deep inside the sorrow she sees in Krystal was hurting her.

She doesn’t want to see her younger sister suffer like this, but there’s nothing she could offer. Despite that she still does gestures to show to Krystal that she cares, that she is there for her.

On those three days, Jessica even offered to eat with Krystal; which isn’t done regularly by the older.

Few hours passed and the bells started to ring, it was dismissal time and the Jung sisters went home together. It was a quiet trip as the two of them didn’t tried to start a conversation.

Jessica held Krystal’s free hand and squeezed it tightly, slowly she swung it with every step they took.

They got home soon and their mother welcomed them with a hug to which they responded with a hug, too.

The two sisters entered the house after taking of their school shoes; suddenly, Jessica took Krystal’s bag and hung it on one of the hooks on their wall.

She patted Krystal’s shoulder before she went up to her room.

It was time for dinner and the two siblings went out of their rooms in unison. The dinner took quite a while, and when it was done, Krystal excused herself.

Jessica volunteered cleaning the dishes and signaled her younger sister that she could go. Once Jessica was done with the chores, she went up to Krystal’s room.

Jessica entered her younger sister’s the room, she saw Krystal lying on the bed with eyes staring blankly at the ceiling.

The older girl sat on the recliner settled on the younger’s room.

The little things Jessica does to express her love to her younger sister had affected Krystal a lot, up to the point that she didn’t hesitated anymore to tell the bothersome feelings inside her.

“Unnie, why is it like this? Why do I feel empty?” Krystal asked without looking to Jessica.

“Firstly, I’m sorry about the foul word I used few days ago” the brunette said sincerely to her younger sister.

“If you lost someone or something important to you, you’ll really feel empty” Jessica added as she plopped her body on the recliner.

“I know that, but why is this feeling troublesome?” she asked as she turned her gaze to her sister.

“I can’t answer that. But let me confront you, by any chance, did Amber confessed to you?” Jessica said as she plays with her fingers.

“Well, she didn’t, but I heard some classmates of mine gossiping that Amber likes me” the younger replied.

“How do you feel about that? Disgusted, confused, happy, or what?” the question was set fast by Jessica. 

“I don’t really know, Unnie. Should I apologize to Amber for not taking things seriously?” a sigh escaped from Krystal as she asked Jessica.

“You should do more than that. You should talk to her and sort things out” the brunette sit up from the recliner and put on her slippers.

“One more thing, stop avoiding each other” Krystal sighed at that statement while Jessica walked out of the room.

The door closed as soon as Jessica exited Krystal’s room.

The raven haired girl looked to her cell phone’s screen; it was already eight o’ clock in the evening.

She started to feel sleepy. Her eyes begin to flutter as the melody of sleepiness lullabies her to slumber.

The younger girl was somehow peaceful in her dream land, while on the other room; Jessica was swirling around the bed.

Not able to sleep because of thinking of ways how to make the situation of her younger sister better.

Jessica knew that the questions Krystal had asked her were just half of what she feels. The older thinks that she needs to dig in deeper to know what’s really bothering Krystal.

“Urgh, why is it like this?! I’m more bothered than my dongsaeng” the brunette yelled out of frustration.

Soon, after a few toss and turns, Jessica had managed to sleep.

In Amber’s house it was a different scenario, the dubstep music played was booming inside her room. Once again, she was home-alone. Her parents are on a business trip again.

Beads of sweat dripped out of her skin as she walked towards the CD player. The loud music stopped and was replaced by heavy breathings.

Amber grabbed her towel settled nearby and went to the bathroom to freshen up.

After half an hour she went out of the door with a new set of sleeping clothes. She quickly brought her pencil and diary from her bag and begun scribbling notes.

I can’t stop thinking about her. It’s only been three days but it felt like it was for a decade.

I hope that we’ll get better after four more days, if ever I can still avoid Krystal.

It’s funny how I requested this kind of thing, now, look at me, almost exhausting the life out of me just to stop remembering her.

I need her more than she knows, but all I do is lie to myself. Lie to everyone that I am okay and keep faking smiles.

Here I am, hoping she misses me. But what should I do? Ask her to stop this silly thing?

                                                                                                                                                                                                    -Liu Yi Yun

~~~

Lies

White lies

It does nothing good

However you spin the world they are still lies

They conceal the truth, deceiving people

Lies are excuses made

By people who wanted to look stronger

But deep inside are fragile souls

Living life filled with sorrow and pain

But still covering their flaws by numerous false