#68:The God Gene (Part X)
Continuity: After the previous drabble

‘You were covered in blood, we didn’t realize how bad it was until we got you inside. We thought you were actually bleeding, until we realized it was…splattered. I thought Chanyeol’s wings were covered in it too, until we tried to wash them and realized they were just red. You’ve been having nightmares these past three days—not like in the past, there’s no screaming or crying. You just laid there and shivered, sometimes you would whimper and…you sounded so scared. There was no way to wake you up, all we could do was just hold you until you grew quiet again. And Chanyeol hasn’t moved at all, he’s so still and quiet…but I think he’s still in pain.’

Baekhyun woke up to Yixing squeezing his ankle gently.

“Hi,” Yixing greeted. “I’m here to work on your muscles.”

Baekhyun nodded and sat up with a groan. He didn’t notice it when he was sleeping, but he really was sore. He glanced at Chanyeol, still knocked out. It had only been a few hours since Baekhyun first woke up, and even though he knew that Chanyeol’s injuries were far worse, the continued lack of consciousness was a little scary.

“I need you to go to the other bed,” Yixing said.

Baekhyun winced. He didn’t want to be apart from Chanyeol, but Yixing was the healer, he would know best. He got up slowly, jaw clenched against the pain. Yixing helped him walk the two feet to the other bed and then Baekhyun collapsed, winded.

“Why does it still hurt?” He panted. “I thought you fixed me.”

Yixing sighed. “It took a lot of energy to get Chanyeol better again…” He trailed off, looking guilty.

Baekhyun glared. “What aren’t you telling me?”

Yixing glanced at the door. “I…it’s just…Chanyeol lost a lot of blood.” He spoke very softly, as if it could lessen the magnitude of his words. “I think that he went into shock. I think his body kind of shut down, not because of the pain, but because of blood loss.”

Baekhyun shivered. “He was unconscious almost the whole time I carried him. Are you saying he…could have died?”

Yixing sighed in frustration. “I don’t know. I don’t know what our bodies are capable of, I don’t know why Chanyeol wasn’t healing, I don’t know why you weren’t healing—”

“I did,” Baekhyun interrupted. “When…um, right before Chanyeol’s wings…my hand healed.”

Yixing looked intrigued. “Really? Did your gift come back at that moment too?”

“I didn’t try to use it at that moment,” Baekhyun mumbled. “I didn’t think to test it, I was distracted.”

“What were you doing?” Yixing asked.

Baekhyun blushed furiously and didn’t answer.

“Oh,” Yixing said. “Oh.”

There was an awkward silence and then Yixing cleared his throat. “I, um…like I was saying it took a lot to heal Chanyeol. I had to help his blood replenish itself. I couldn’t do a lot, that’s probably why he’s still unconscious. Anyway what I did for you was mostly preliminary stuff to help you not feel like you were dying, now I can fine tune it.” He paused. “You, um…I need you to undress.”

Baekhyun pouted. “Why?”

“So I can have easier access. I can’t heal through clothing. You can leave your underwear on.”

“Gee, thanks a lot,” Baekhyun sniped. He undressed without looking at Yixing, literally hissing when he was offered help. Once Baekhyun had stripped down to his underwear Yixing started working, laying his hands on Baekhyun’s shoulders.

“This is where you’re most hurt,” he explained. “When you got here I managed to fix a lot of problems just with this position, now I need to feel more for where you’re hurt…” He dragged his hands down Baekhyun’s back, pressing slightly. Baekhyun gasped in pain about halfway down.

“You’re really torn up,” Yixing said. “By the Tree…”

Warmth spread from Yixing’s hands through Baekhyun’s back and he groaned, leaning into the touch.

“Better?” Yixing asked.

Baekhyun nodded. He hesitated for a moment. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. And hissed at you.”

“What?” Yixing asked distractedly. “Oh Baekhyun, it’s fine.”

“No, you were just trying to help me and…I’m just not used to…you know, walking around exposed.”

“Oh,” Yixing said. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“Like I said, you were just trying to help,” Baekhyun muttered.

Yixing continued to work on Baekhyun’s back. It took him a few minutes to finish, and when he was done he handed Baekhyun his shirt. “I’ll work on your legs now, but put it on and tell me if you feel any pain.”

Baekhyun did just that. “My back feels okay, but my ribs are a little sore.” Without being prompted he lifted his shirt so Yixing could poke around on his chest.

“Oh, yeah,” Yixing mumbled. “You are all messed up. Hang on, I need to kind of kneel over you…” Yixing ended up with one leg across Baekhyun’s thighs, his palms spread on Baekhyun’s ribs. “Sorry,” he said, “This is kind of odd.”

“Well it’s working,” Baekhyun said with a shrug.

Yixing hummed, pressing into Baekhyun’s ribs a little harder.

“Why is my whole body so screwed up when I was just carrying him on my back?”

Yixing grinned. “You know why. Everything is connected, your back, your ribs, your shoulders, your legs, everything runs together. Your whole body was trying to help compensate for Chanyeol’s dead weight.”

Baekhyun shuddered, and Yixing felt it. “You alright?”

Baekhyun gulped. “I don’t know,” he said quietly. “I…when we got here…was I awake?”

Yixing looked shocked. “Yeah, you were talking to us…” he trailed off. “Kind of.”

“Kind of?”

“You…I mean I only heard a little but when I was healing you, you kept saying that you weren’t hurt, Chanyeol was, and I needed to take care of him first. I already had though, we—me and Suho—we told you a few times that Chanyeol was going to be okay…”

Baekhyun knew he must have looked stunned.

Yixing pulled his hands back, looking down at Baekhyun worriedly. “Do you remember that?”

Baekhyun shook his head.

Yixing slowly stood up. “I guess that’s not surprising, given your condition. You were dehydrated, hurting, you’d been in the sun for…” he stopped. “How long did you walk for?”

Baekhyun focused on that—he knew that. “We left at sunset and walked through the night, then the next day, and then again through the night.”

“Did you stop?”

“Once,” Baekhyun said quietly. “Then I saw that he was bleeding through the bandages, and I didn’t stop after that.”

Yixing’s jaw dropped. “You walked for thirty six hours with Chanyeol on your back, and you only stopped once? For what, a minute? By the Tree, okay, no wonder you were so out of it when you got here, oh my god you…” he sat on the bed, looking like he was deep in thought. “What happened? Why did the two of you leave in the first place, what was it that Chanyeol was trying to accomplish?”

Baekhyun sighed and leaned back. “Chanyeol took me away because he wanted to help me. He wanted…he said that I ever let him take care of me, in any way, and he wanted to do that. So I let him. That’s when I started healing again.”

“Is that when you started speaking again too?” Yixing asked. “I should have asked you that first. It was such a shock to hear your voice again.”

Baekhyun nodded. “Yes, I started speaking again.”

Yixing nodded. “I saw the light you unleashed last night, it was very powerful. It’s also strange, that level of power you were able to summon under the circumstances. Can you try to use your gift now?”

Baekhyun took a deep breath and held up his palm. He concentrated hard, and a tiny little ball of light hovered above his palm, but it was very dim. He was so disappointed.

“Actually, that’s pretty good, all things considered,” Yixing said. “It sounds like you were better, until…this happened. I don’t know if the light you released was just so much that now you need recovery or if maybe you’re stressed. Right now you are actually healing yourself, but it’s very minor, it’s actually about the same as the strength of your gift.”

“And Chanyeol’s not healing at all,” Baekhyun said quietly.

“No,” Yixing agreed.

Baekhyun glanced over at him. He was sound asleep, his chest rising and falling steadily.

Yixing went to the end of the bed and pulled Baekhyun’s legs into his lap and worked his hands over Baekhyun’s calves. “Talking about it might help.”

Baekhyun laughed hollowly. “Help who?”

“You.”

Baekhyun almost said that he wasn’t the one who needed help, but then he stopped himself. Chanyeol would want him to ask for help, to take help when it was offered.

“We talked about…me, for a little while,” Baekhyun began. “I told him that I felt so cold compared to him. I’m so bad at loving people, reaching out to people…he said that I’m not. He said that he knows how loving I am. After that…that’s when the wings…they just ripped out of his back. I closed my eyes at first but when I heard his skin split open, that’s when I opened my eyes. For a second I just saw all the blood. It was like…it was disgusting. I was stunned for a while but eventually I went to him. He was unconscious and I knew I needed to clean the wounds. So I boiled water and put some towels in it to disinfect them, then I started cleaning the wounds. He was in a lot of pain, I didn’t want to move him, but when I realized he wasn’t healing I knew I had to. I was worried about flies…so I wrapped the wounds.” Baekhyun took a deep, shuddering breath. “He screamed until he passed out. And I ignored him and kept going. I hurt him…”

Yixing squeezed his calf. “You saved him,” he said fiercely. “Truly, what you did was so important, I would have done the same thing. Since he wasn’t healing, if the wounds had become infected…I don’t know what would have happened. He could have gotten seriously ill, if it had gotten infected we might have needed to amputate the wings, I don’t know. But the wounds were clean when you got him here.”

Baekhyun nodded, but he kept his eyes down. “He’ll know that I hurt him.”

“He’ll know that you saved him from even worse pain. Do you know how much infected, open wounds can hurt? Chanyeol will call you a hero when he wakes up.”

Baekhyun wanted to smile at that. He wanted to be proud of himself for what he had done, but it was so hard to be happy with Chanyeol lying there, unresponsive.

Yixing slowly massaged Baekhyun’s ankles, looking deep in thought. “You suffered a lot. All of us have, and now with this business with Tao and Kai going on…I don’t know what we’ll do. I really wonder if we’ll ever be alright, mentally.”

Baekhyun sighed. “I’m not hurting anymore, Yixing. There’s nothing wrong with me.”

Yixing glared at Baekhyun fiercely. “Just because you don’t have two gaping holes in your back it doesn’t mean that you’re not hurting. You’re hurt up here,” and he reached out and tapped his finger against Baekhyun’s temple, “And that’s just as painful as any other injury, it’s okay not to be alright and it’s okay to need some time to recover.”

Baekhyun knew Yixing wasn’t wrong, but it didn’t feel right. “Chanyeol has it worse.” He felt like crying. “It just isn’t fair. He never did anything wrong and he’s suffering.”

Yixing sighed and stood up, handing Baekhyun his pants. Baekhyun couldn’t even bring himself to be happy that he didn’t feel any pain when he redressed. He got up and went back to Chanyeol’s bed.

“You know,” Yixing said, “You said before that you felt cold next to Chanyeol, and you didn’t know how to express your love for him. But the way you’re acting now, the way you responded when he was hurt…I don’t think anyone could have cared for him better.”

Baekhyun was stunned. He gaped at Yixing. “But I didn’t…it was what anyone would have done.”

“But it came from you,” Yixing said. “You wrapped his wounds, you carried him for miles on your own back, you came here covered in blood and aching and all you could think about was his well-being.” He grinned and patted Baekhyun’s shoulder. “He’s lucky to have you.”

Baekhyun was silent. He didn’t know what to say.

Yixing gestured towards the door. “We’re having a meeting to discuss what Kai and Tao learned. Do you want to come?”

“No,” Baekhyun said firmly. “No, I’m staying here.”

“Don’t you want to know what’s going on?”

Baekhyun shook his head. “I don’t care, Chanyeol’s more important to me. Just, I don’t know, warn me if they’re going to disrupt the space-time continuum or something.”

Yixing laughed. “Sure, I’ll keep you posted. Come find me if he wakes up, okay?”

Baekhyun waited until Yixing left, then he crawled under the blanket and pressed close to Chanyeol, as close as he could without moving him. How could Baekhyun ever put words to what Chanyeol meant to him? This was the boy who never once gave up on him, who tried—even if he was slightly misguided—to bring Baekhyun out of his shell and connect with him. This was the boy who knew about Baekhyun’s nightmares and would come hold him when they got bad, never mentioning it in front of the others but always being there as a quiet yet strong support. This was the man that Baekhyun rediscovered, years and years later, finally realizing just how special Chanyeol was.

And maybe Baekhyun was that special too. Maybe it wasn’t about being deserving of Chanyeol’s love, but about becoming accepting of his own qualities, good and bad.

Baekhyun felt himself tearing up. That was really where he failed. It was that he refused to allow himself to see what Chanyeol loved about him. But Baekhyun knew the reasons, so he closed his eyes and whispered them to himself.

“I am funny, I make people smile. I make them laugh.”

“I am so good looking it’s almost unfair to the rest of humankind.”

“I am accepting of other people’s flaws. I don’t try to make people change.”

“I know what I want, even when I don’t think I do. It’s confusing, but it makes sense.”

“I have a bright smile. I love my smile as much as I love Chanyeol’s.”

“I take care of my friends, and I love them.”

Baekhyun hiccupped on a sob and wiped his eyes. “Chanyeol,” he whimpered, “I wish you could hear this. I hope you’ll wake up soon.” He sat up and kissed Chanyeol’s cheek, his jaw, his temple. He smiled to himself and leaned down to whisper into Chanyeol’s ear, “Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess who was turned into a sparrow, and there were two brave little boys who fought for her hand in marriage…”

Tao squirmed under the gaze of eight other people. He wished they could have done this outside, or in a bigger space, but the house they were in was very cramped. Everyone was just sitting around, staring, and for some reason their passive stances made Tao even more nervous. This wasn’t going to be easy to explain, and Tao felt like the walls were closing in around him.

“So,” Chen asked, “How exactly did you two figure this out?”

Tao was silent. Kai answered, “I thought about it a while ago and told Tao. We didn’t want to bring it up because we didn’t have any proof that it would work. We’ve been experimenting for a while but it was Tao who figured it out.”

Tao glared at Kai. He didn’t want to talk.

“Tao,” Suho said softly, “Please just tell us how you figured this out.”

Tao glanced at him and Kris before sighing and deciding to get it over with. “I meditated. I haven’t done it since…since the woods. But I finally did it and, I really don’t know what I did exactly, but somehow it was like I got in touch with my gift again and I could really feel how powerful I was. It was then that I just felt this pull, and I concentrated on that feeling…I can’t explain it but it felt like it was taking me somewhere. I didn’t know where, or rather when, because I realized that whatever it was, it was pulling me towards the past. That’s how I figured it out.”

“How long ago was this?” Xiumin asked.

Tao fidgeted. “Two days ago. I told Kai yesterday but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do anything about it.”

“And now?” Kris prompted.

“Now…I kind of want to try.”

“Try what, exactly?” Chen asked.

“Going to the past,” Kai answered. “If it works then maybe we can change something, but we wanted to run it by everyone first.”

Chen leapt to his feet, sparks flying from his fingers. “No way in hell.”

Kai looked surprised. “We didn’t say anything yet.”

Chen pointed his finger at Kai. “You!” He shouted, “You’ve done this to me before! Tell me, what did you do this time?”

Kai looked guilty. “We didn’t go all the way back but…Tao and I used our gifts at the same time and realized that we can, physically, go back in time. Like if we went back to exactly five minutes ago, there would be two of me and two of Tao sitting in this room, and we would all be aware of the future me and Tao. But we didn’t go anywhere, we just tested it a little—”

“Even though you knew it could potentially have awful results?” Chen yelled. “By the Tree! Kai, what were you thinking? What if you got stuck? What if something went wrong? What if you got hurt?!” He marched over and grabbed Kai by his collar, hauling him to his feet and shaking him. “What the actual hell were you thinking?!”

Kai held Chen’s wrists. “After all these years,” he said quietly, “You’re still afraid that something will happen to me?”

“Yes!” Chen yelled, eyes shining with tears. “Because you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I will be damned if I lose you, do you understand me? You can’t leave me, Jongin!”

Tao still got a shock every time he heard Kai and Chen call each other by their given names. He was even more shocked at how Chen was reacting, he hadn’t known that this was such a big thing between the two of them.

Kai cradled Chen’s face in his hands. “I’m sorry,” he said. “But my love, you’re the best thing that’s happened to me too. How could you think that I would allow myself to be separated from you?”

Chen whimpered and started crying harder. “You’re so…pig headed, you run into things without thinking, you underestimate danger.”

“Nothing happened,” Kai pointed out. “I’m still here.”

“You could have been hurt,” Chen insisted. “And I wouldn’t have known.”

Kai looked as miserable as Chen did. “You’re right. I am sorry I didn’t tell you, it won’t happen again, but I promise that this is totally safe. Tao wouldn’t sign off on it if it wasn’t, you know.”

“It’s true,” Tao said, “We’ll be safe.”

Chen sniffled and wiped his eyes. Kai kissed his forehead, his nose, and his lips. He said something so quietly that Tao was sure nobody but Chen heard it, and then Chen started crying even harder.

“We’ll be back,” Kai said, and then he took Chen’s hand and lead him out of the room.

There was a brief silence. “We really will be okay,” Tao said to the room at large. “Kai and I want to try this at least once. I don’t know what time we’ll end up in, but it would be back on our home planet. We won’t mess anything up, we won’t go see our past selves, we’ll be smart about it. Even if we never use this ability again, we want to explore this aspect of our power more thoroughly.”

Kris held Tao’s hand. “It’s your power, so it’s up to you and Kai. If you want to do this, we can’t stop you, and we won’t stop you.”

Tao smiled and squeezed Kris’ hand gently. “Thank you,” he said.

Suho took Tao’s other hand. “I agree, it’s really your choice.”

Around the room there were murmurs of agreement. After a few more minutes Kai and Chen came back, both looking like they had been crying, but their hands were clasped.

“So,” Kai said, his voice a little raspy. “Are we doing this?”

Tao nodded. “If it’s okay with you, it’s okay with me.”

Kai smiled. “It’s okay with us.” Chen nodded, but gave Tao a look that made it clear if Kai didn’t come back in one piece there would be hell to pay.

“So,” Kai continued, “When should we go?”

Tao considered it for a moment. He glanced at Yixing. “Baekhyun didn’t want to be a part of this?” He asked.

Yixing shook his head.

“Then let’s go now,” Tao said.

“Right now?” Kai confirmed.

“Right now,” Tao echoed. “I know what to do and I can feel something, like, buzzing inside my head saying we should go right now…”

“And we trust this guy,” Chen mumbled.

Kai chuckled and kissed him. “See you soon,” he said.

Tao turned to give Kris and Suho a kiss each. “Be right back,” he said. “Now stand back, give us some space.”

Everyone moved to the edges of the room, and Kai and Tao stood in the center and grasped each other’s hands.

“Ready?” Kai asked.

“Ready,” Tao confirmed.

There was a rush of wind, darkness, the feeling of being pulled, a brief, consuming silence…and then there was the sounds of a bustling market.

Tao opened his eyes and his heart soared. All around him he heard Northern dialect, he saw the familiar towering structures of the Northern capitol. They were home.

“Kai,” he breathed, “We did it!”

Kai was looking around, awed and confused. “But this my town,” he said. “Why are we here?”

Tao was too elated to think properly. “Let’s go, let’s walk around!”

He and Kai had arrived in a small alleyway in the middle of town, and they easily stepped out and blended in. Nobody gave them a second glance, even though their clothing was a little off. Still their dark jeans and plain, hooded sweaters weren’t different enough to call attention to themselves. Tao looked around, drinking in the sights of objects and foods he hadn’t seen in years. He held tight to Kai’s hand so they wouldn’t get lost in the bustling crowds.

“This is amazing,” Tao said. “I wonder what year it is…would it be weird if I asked?”

Kai didn’t answer, instead he came to an abrupt halt. When Tao looked at him, he saw that Kai was pale and wide eyed.

“That woman,” Kai said, pointing a head, “She’s…”

Tao followed his finger. ‘Woman’ might have been an overstatement, she looked much younger, maybe eighteen. She was thin and hungry looking, her clothing tattered. She was standing outside of a tavern, smiling at passing people and sometimes flashing a hand gesture that Tao recognized.

“That signal,” he said quietly, “Is she—”

Kai grasped Tao’s wrist so tightly that Tao yelped. “Ow, Kai!”

“Tao,” Kai said urgently, “That’s my mother.”

Suho watched Chen pace, counting the steps that he took. Chen hadn’t stopped pacing since Kai left, four hours ago.

“They’ll be back soon,” Kyungsoo said, looking up at Chen and following his movements. “You’ll see.”

Chen was chewing his nails. “I don’t know. I feel like something is wrong. Not like they’re hurt but like…something happened.”

“Like what?” Kris asked. Chen didn’t answer.

Not ten minutes later there was a rush of wind, a flash of light and then Tao and Kai were standing in the middle of the room, in the same position that they’d left in. As soon as the light cleared away, Kai fell to the floor in tears.

“Kai!” Chen screamed, rushing forward. “Are you okay, are you hurt?”
Kris and Suho ran over as well, latching onto Tao. Tao looked frantic. “He’s not hurt,” Tao said, “He’s just, we, we saw…”

“What?” Chen demanded, holding Kai close to his chest, “What happened?”

Kai grabbed Chen’s hand and he calmed down at once. “Baby, what happened?” Chen asked.

Kai looked up at him with such a stricken look on his face that everyone stepped closer, wanting to help.

“I saw my mother,” Kai said shakily. “I talked to her, I got to know her,” he broke off with a sob. “I was so wrong about her, by the Tree I was so wrong, I didn’t know, I didn’t know anything!”

Suho knelt down and Kai grabbed his hand. “Hyung,” he whimpered, “She was…she was only…she…”

“Calm down,” Suho said, “Take a deep breath.”

Kai did so and then cried harder. “She was an orphan,” he sobbed. “She was only fifteen when I was born, she was all alone, I didn’t know, and I hated her, I hated her and she was…I was wrong…” he broke off, crying too hard to continue.

Chen handed Kai over to Suho, and Suho held Kai in his arms and rocked him gently. “Shh, baby it’s okay, just breathe, we can talk later, let’s get you somewhere else, okay? Come on, you need to lay down.”

Suho carried Kai away, Chen following behind them. The remaining Guardians turned to Tao.

“What happened?” Kris asked.

Tao looked shaken as well. “We met his mother,” he said numbly. “And…and we learned that the Guardians really wronged her.” His knees buckled and Kris barely managed to catch him.

Tao looked around the room. “That planet,” he said weakly, “Was even more messed up than we realized.”

I said I wasn’t going to update anything for a while but really I needed to do something, I can’t just sit by and twiddle my thumbs.

I’ll admit this chapter went a different direction than I had planned, and it feels very rushed, which I am sorry about but now I just wanted to get this chapter done and out. For those who are worried, this story will continue as I had planned, but it may take longer to write. Some parts of this hurt to write, I had the whole Baekhyun scene written but starting from Tao’s perspective I just sat down tonight and made myself get it done.

I’m going to ask everyone to kindly refrain from talking about the lawsuit in the comments section. do not mention it or anything pertaining to it at all or I will delete your comment. Only comment on the fic, not EXO’s current, past, or future state. I’m writing this as a distraction from all that, I don’t want it mentioned in my story's comments and I hope you will all respect that.

I hope you enjoyed the update! See you (hopefully) soon.

(PS at the very beginning Baekhyun was dreaming about something Suho said to him.)