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"I can't believe you're not gonna be home for Christmas."

Donghae heard a sigh. But still he stayed in his position, rigid, refusing to look back towards the man who had spent approximately fifteen minutes trying to coax him out of his blanket cocoon.

"Baby, we've talked about this."

"And I hated that talk. No one's working on Christmas' holiday except you. We bought everything and then suddenly you will just leave me alone with—" he tucked his arm out of the blanket and motioned random shapes in the air. "—all these unassembled random decorations?"

"If you think I'm purposely working on holiday, you are wrong," Hyukjae put his hand on the boy's shoulder—which quickly got shaken away. 

"I canceled my piano classes to be with you on Christmas week."

"Donghae, please. It's important."

"... and I'm not?"

He could feel Hyukjae stiffening behind him—frozen as if Donghae's words had punched him straight in the gut. Deep down, the boy knew that he was being somewhat of an , but he really couldn't understand why Hyukjae had to work on holidays. Fine, maybe holiday was not the problem here, but on Christmas? Seriously? Donghae had been so happy throughout the week, shopping tree and all of its sparkly decorations and Hyukjae's promise of skating together again and baking ginger men and basically just being together throughout the remaining days of the year—only for the man to abruptly cancel all the neat plans just because he had to fly for work just a day before Christmas.

He didn't understand—and he didn't want to understand whatever reason Hyukjae had to say, even if it made him a little bit of a spoiled and ungrateful brat.

Donghae quietly sniffled and crawled out of his cocoon, hiding his tears away, avoiding Hyukjae's eyes while knowing well that the man was desperately trying to meet his gaze.

"Donghae…"

"I don't want to sleep with you."

"Donghae."

"Don't touch me."

He tried to push away those arms trying to pull him back—even though all of him was dying to be held—and Hyukjae instantly unhanded him like he was burned.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled quietly. His eyes were casted on Donghae. But Donghae wouldn't know, since he was too busy looking away. "Take the blanket with you."

Donghae wanted to be stubborn and ignored Hyukjae thoroughly—it wasn't fair! It wasn't fair that Hyukjae was being so gentle with him at all times. Wasn't fair because it almost staggered his stance, almost melting his heart on instance. He kind of wished that the man would shout at him instead.

"You're so unfair." He spat, out of spite.

But Hyukjae was taking his words to a different context.

"I'll make it up to you."

"Nothing could make it up, hyung," Donghae bitterly grabbed the blanket Hyukjae was holding and turned away. "Good night."

.

It was three days later and Donghae found himself sitting on the floor, unpacking some of the new decorations for their tree—his tree. Some of the last Christmas' decorations were as good as new, so they didn't buy too much this year, including the cute angel tree topper, so that to put it on the top of the tree Donghae was going to need a chair for.

Three days and he hadn't spoken a word with his boyfriend—it was he who didn't speak a word to Hyukjae, whereas Hyukjae was constantly trying to make casual conversation with the boy at every chance he got. He still kissed Donghae's forehead before he went to work for half a day (Donghae pulled away, most of the times), and dropped into the guest bedroom to bid the boy goodnight, even though he knew Donghae would just thoroughly ignored him and refused to look at him until he went back to his own bedroom.

Donghae hated fighting—hated the silent war (his silent war). He wanted Hyukjae to hold and kiss him and let him sleep in his arms. But the boy was upset—he had never felt so upset with Hyukjae until now, had never felt so hurt even though deep down, his inner heart was telling him to stop being a brat and a weight on Hyukjae's shoulders.

But he was so upset.

So upset that he didn't budge when the front door swung open and closed, merely listening to the sound of someone carefully taking off their shoes in the hallway. Didn't turn his head when he heard the soft footsteps getting closer and closer, until Hyukjae stopped just right behind him, only a few meters away, as if the man was contemplating between his choices.

Donghae didn't even give Hyukjae any response when after a few moments, the man sighed and knelt behind the boy's sitting form, gently wrapping his arms around his young lover and pulled him into a hug.

"I'm sorry, Donghae," Hyukjae whispered softly, gentle lips pressing against Donghae's neck. "You're important. You're the most important thing for me, sweetheart. Always remember that."

"... thing?"

He felt a huffled laugh against his skin. "Person. My most beloved. My everything. My love." When Donghae didn't respond, Hyukjae tucked his chin on the boy's shoulder, peeking up. "Is that what you wanna hear, sweetheart?"

And Donghae hated it. How he could never actually get mad at his boyfriend—he was mad, he was upset, but it was tough to stay angry when the cause of his anger was holding him and talking to him the way you would do to a child or a small animal. As if he was delicate.

Maybe that was how Hyukjae saw him. Delicate.

He sagged against the man, supporting his entire weight against Hyukjae's chest, curled up between his legs as the man shifted to properly sit on the floor so he could hold Donghae in a more reasonable position.

"Can't you do something about it?" Donghae whispered against his chest.

Hyukjae his cheek gently. Letting his thumb remained on Donghae's cheek bone. "I'm afraid I can't…"

"But I thought you own the company." He was so stubborn. He wanted to stop saying ridiculous things, wanted to stop being a weight on Hyukjae's shoulders. It should be hard on him as well.

But oh well, did he loath the situation. He had kept his ego in check every time Hyukjae found himself having to go on business trips on the worst timing, ever since they were together. For some reason, he couldn't hold it back anymore—not now, not on Christmas. Especially not on Christmas.

Hyukjae knew well what Christmas meant for him.

"I am," Hyukjae chuckled quietly and tucked him closer. "but, when you're working with the national ministry, there are times when you should go along with what they want, baby."

He kissed his hair, practically blanketing Donghae in his arms. "Or do you wish to go with me, Hae?"

That was not what he wanted. "That's not what I want."

"I know what you want."

"I know I can't always have what I want. You spoiled me too much. Look what you've done."

"My fault. I'm sorry." For once Donghae allowed the man to rearrange his position so that he was on his lap. "Can't help but spoil my baby when he's this cute."

Hyukjae  stared down at the boy, clearly contemplating something mischievous, before all of sudden he bites the tip of the boy's nose. Donghae almost slapped him.

"So I'll be alone on Christmas," he mumbled in remorse, tucking his face on the crook of Hyukjae's neck. "Where are you flying to again?"

"China."

"I demand stuff from