third day

the next day, junmyeon tries his best to stay awake. he does not want to have chanyeol walking into him sleeping like yesterday so he reads his favourite book. his mother dropped by a visit with it as she brought him his lunch. he decides to keep awake reading it, glancing at the flowers from time to time. "it is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible for the eye." there are knocks on the door as soon as he finishes reading the sentence. junmyeon closes the book as he tells the person to come in. "hi," junmyeon greets the taller, trying hard not to smile widely or else his lower lip will hurt. "hi," chanyeol smiles briefly, heading straight to sit on the chair, "have you eaten?" junmyeon nods before noting the lack of sleep in the latter's eyes, "how about you?" 

chanyeol honestly does not have an appetite to eat ever since junmyeon was captured. he eats in small portions but now he is accustomed to eating bread. "bought some pastries," he settles the paper bag on the mini-fridge next to the bed near his side. "you didn't answer my question," junmyeon gently says. chanyeol sighs, picking at the sleeve of his long coat, "no appetite." junmyeon keeps looking at chanyeol. "i want to ask something but it may come out upsetting." chanyeol nods, still picking at his sleeve. "are you marrying me because of your guilt?" chanyeol averts his gaze to the smaller at once with a sharp stare. junmyeon is petrified, "i'm sorry-" 

"i haven't answered," chanyeol leans forward, resting his arms on the bed, looking at junmyeon fondly, "i've noticed you staring during the gatherings." heat rushes to junmyeon's face. "i wasn't staring," junmyeon quickly denies while looking down, fiddling with the duvet, cheeks pinking, "i was finding ways to talk to you." chanyeol chuckles quietly. he takes junmyeon's small hand and holds it with both of his hands gingerly. 

"i tried so hard to avoid you. i don't want the person i have an interest in to be in danger. i guess i failed terribly," he leans in to rest his forehead on junmyeon's small hand, "even if you forgive me, i won't be able to forgive myself. the guilt is carved within me. to answer your question, i'm not marrying you because of my guilt. i'm marrying you because i want to hug you to keep you warm whenever you feel cold or when you feel down. i'm marrying you because i want to make coffee for you every morning. i'm marrying you because i want to bring you everywhere around the world to eat good food. i'm marrying you because i want to see you every day before and after i sleep. i'm marrying you because i want you to myself for the rest of my life." 

junmyeon has his face almost covered with his other hand. he feels like his cheeks are about to explode. junmyeon only asked one question and in reply, it feels like this man is proposing to him instead. he really wants to kiss chanyeol right now. "i can't believe i'm saying this but i never thought i could experience this feeling," chanyeol props his chin into the palm of his left hand, holding junmyeon's hand with the other, "my world was black and white but after we started interacting, i started to feel colors." junmyeon tears up a little. there is so much more in chanyeol's voice. it seems like the latter is holding in to cry too. "you can cry," junmyeon squeezes his hand, taking his attention, "it's okay to cry." 

chanyeol stares blankly as he straightens up, "i don't deserve to cry, junmyeon. i've done so many unspeakable things. i don't even deserve an angel like you." junmyeon huffs out a teary chuckle. he slowly withdraws his hand from chanyeol's hold. chanyeol watches the hand coming up to his face. junmyeon leans forward as he cups chanyeol's jaw. chanyeol watches junmyeon close his eyes before leaning forward toward him. junmyeon presses a soft peck on chanyeol's cheek, right under the plaster, before moving away. he holds chanyeol's hand again, smiling as lightly as he can, "i can't kiss you yet because of my injured lip." chanyeol blinks at the shy junmyeon. he then drops his head to the mattress so fast that startles junmyeon greatly. 

"chanyeol?!" 

junmyeon slips his fingers through the latter's hair, trying to lift his head but chanyeol strongly resists. "i'm fine," chanyeol mumbles, feeling his cheeks being so hot he knows his face is red. the pleasant warmth in his chest is spreading up to his face. he never felt like this before and it was still weird for him to get used to it. junmyeon is worried now. "you can sleep for a while if you want. it looks like you need it," junmyeon pats chanyeol's head, his other slipping through the medium-long locks as he keeps combing with his digits, "i'll wake you up after half an hour. is that okay?" the occasional scraps of the pads of junmyeon's fingers against his scalp has chanyeol becoming sluggish. he never allowed anyone (except for his sister) to touch him like this before. he feels calm ever since he has accepted the pleasant warmth in his chest. especially whenever he is with junmyeon. chanyeol remembers to nod before succumbing to a deep sleep. 

"chanyeol. chanyeol? i'm sorry but it's been half an hour. chanyeol. hey," junmyeon gently cradles a side of the taller male's face once he opens his eyes, "it's already half an hour." chanyeol blinks slowly, his neck hurting. his cheek is pressed on his arms and they are starting to hurt too. crap. it will be such a bother if his muscles are cramped. "thank you," he sits up straight after running his palms on his face, smiling sleepily at junmyeon, "i didn't think i needed a nap." junmyeon smiles but then winces, trying not to touch his lip as his hand flaps in front of his mouth, "i keep forgetting not to smile." chanyeol feels sad but junmyeon quickly says he is fine. "you don't want to sleep?" junmyeon shakes his head, "i'm trying to hang on until night arrives. i think i'll be able to sleep well from tonight." 

chanyeol smiles warmly, "i'm glad. i'll be leaving now." chanyeol gets up. he leans in, combing back junmyeon's bangs making the smaller a bit surprised before pressing his lips on junmyeon's forehead. "i'll see you tomorrow." junmyeon watches the taller leaving. the door closes. junmyeon