it's the truth that seungwan's family is doing okay regarding the money. well, if you'd ask seungwan she'd say that but if you'd ask literally anyone else they would say that they are loaded.

it doesn't matter though because it's not seungwan who is rich, it's her parents. her sister can still live in their mansion with her boyfriend because she has him. a significant other that is a man. seungwan on the other hand was born to love women.

she's more than okay with that, she prefers women over men anyway. there is something special about women that men don't have. she's sure her sister's boyfriend is great but... she can't imagine living the life they have.

the thing is - they are christian to the core. everything revolves around god. even the reason they have that much money is because god gifted it to the family.

and the reason they had seungwan was because god knows when a family is too much blessing and needs to be knocked down a peg or two. that's what her father said anyway, when he stood there in her bedroom, all of her stuff packed and ready to go.

she didn't even tell them she was gay, they found out by going through her laptop. she may have written some posts in her anonymous account about how s are better than (she stands by that). her family figured it was a test from god to see if they would follow his path or go to hell with seungwan.

they chose god.

honestly, them.

she's now living with three roommates, two dogs, and two cats. she wanted to get her hamster from her house but her sister confiscated him. last time she saw him, he was upside down, having just eaten a huge carrot.

she misses him.

the thing is - - the whole point - - she just got fired.

she can't pay her rent this month (and probably the next), she can't buy food because she limited herself to one meal per day (budget reasons). she already sold her bicycle and has to walk inhuman distances every day to her job.

well, at least she won't have to do that anymore.

she sighs as she eats seulgi's chips. there have been fights about missing food recently and she won't tell she is responsible for it. if she did, she also would need to tell them she can't pay rent. and then she'd get thrown out again. this time there won't be a friend that will let her crash on the couch (thanks seulgi).

she doesn't know what to do anymore. she applied to so many jobs already but it's summer and all the teens are grabbing those jobs away from her. someone who doesn't have a degree can't compete with the youth of today.

waitressing was okay but now she has an urge to move up somehow, to start living like an adult. she's twenty-three, after all, people her age are finishing college.

seungwan refreshes the job ad website and sighs again. nothing new. she has to lower her standards before she can move up. everyone starts from the bottom, right?

she goes on a sketchy website, which is similar to a forum. people post all kinds of things here but also small jobs that need to be done. it's unofficial but it's also how she managed to pay for her rent right after her parents kicked her out. it seems like she's back where she started. unfortunately.

wiping her brow, seungwan blows out air from her lungs. it's scorching hot and some couple hired her to mow their lawn. some kids were making fun of her for whole fifteen minutes as she was drenched in sweat. while she was complaining before, she is now kind of grateful for the walking and cycling she did before. she's in better shape than before, she pats her abs.

the sun is high up and she's done this time. all of this for some fifty bucks, oh how far the mighty had fallen. it's no better than the few tips here and there but seungwan was always good with people, she likes them. what her family has taught her is to be kind to everyone (because god is watching but that's beside the point). they never bad-mouthed anyone, just left them alone if they didn't like them. seungwan being one of them.

she takes a sip of the water bottle she brought for herself and looks around. the couple isn't home right now and she wonders if they would be mad if she just stayed there for a minute or two longer. to catch her breath.

she peeks at the security camera by the door and moves to leave the lawnmower by the garage. she hopes they won't drive into it when they come back.

the kids chase her with bikes when she leaves and she indulges them, acting way more annoyed than she actually is. seungwan knows they mean no harm, they are just being childish. as they should be.

she has another job in an hour, it's nearby so she doesn't hurry to get there. old lady will pay her to vacuum her house because she doesn't have the strength to do so anymore. her son wrote an ad and asked for help because he's working and is too busy to help. she can't help but think about her own place -- she always keeps tidy. seungwan doesn't want to bother anyone, especially her roommates. they could all decide not to live with her if she was messy. that won't do. she doesn't have the time to look for a new place to live and work at the same time.

seulgi is her father's employee's daughter. they both would goof off while their fathers talked business. seungwan remembers barbeques in the backyard and chasing seulgi with a snail in her hands. they always got along. when seungwan was in trouble seulgi was sure to help however she could.

when seungwan was kicked out seulgi was in the process of moving out. it just happened to be so that they had enough space for seungwan. seulgi promised she could stay however long she wanted so seungwan did. she, of course, got a job to help with the rent, and other girls -- sooyoung and yerim -- treated her very kindly. all of them are very busy with their own stuff so they don't really get together but there are no problems between them.

it's tough. she kind of feels lonely a lot of the time. before she had co-workers that invited her out once in a while but now her phone is silent. she talked with seulgi and she seems like she's doing alright. seungwan doesn't want to intrude into her life.

everyone says she's kind, she repeats in her head, it can't be her fault that no one wants her in her life.

her uality aside, she never had someone she likes. all her friends -- who knew she's gay -- were online and while she flirted here and there, nothing came out of it. she's not sure what she can offer to people. all she knows is that she can never meet other person with anger. she always understands, even when she doesn't agree.

that's why she doesn't hate her parents or her sister. they did what they