It’s during their summer break when their parents suggest they spend it with their eldest sister. The suggestion gives Seulgi pause. They haven’t seen their sister in years. Definitely well before the pandemic even started. Not since their sister had an argument with their parents and then promptly moved away from home. Which is why Seulgi is more than a little surprised that her mother is suggesting it.

“Are you…sure?” She asks, wondering if perhaps she misheard.

“Of course,” their mother says, as she continues puttering about the kitchen, putting away plates and taking out marinated chicken for their dinner later, her voice a careful study of nonchalance. “Travel is a lot safer now, and you’ve both had your vaccinations. It would be a nice chance for you to spend time with your sister.”

Seulgi takes a closer look at her mom, there’s a hopeful expression just lingering at the corners of her eyes and the firm press of . Across the table from her, their father is studiously looking at anything but his wife and daughters but he isn’t frowning and there’s something that's almost-but-not-quite a smile turning up his cheeks. That’s what ultimately makes the decision for her. 

Seulgi and Yesol take the train from Daejeon to Seoul. Their sister had called before their train departed, saying she can’t pick them up from the train station but that her apartment is just a quick cab ride away. Something a college freshman and a twelve-year-old should be able to handle. 

She spends the cab ride staring out the window, trying to compare the metropolitan sky scrapers and streets of Seoul to her own hometown. Yesol, normally the chatty one, is silent beside her, every now and then adjusting the position of her facemask.

What strikes her most about this city, at first glance, is the light: clear and vivid, tumbling from the grey-blue skies with reckless abandon. She allows her gaze to slacken, letting concrete and color melt together, and somewhere in the sun-soaked blur she thinks she can catch a glimpse of why her sister left Daejeon for good.

When they arrive at the apartment building, they press the house number of their sister’s unit and wait for the telltale buzz that will let them into the building. They take the elevator and get off at the right floor, walk to the end of the hallway as instructed and knock at the third to the last door.

When it opens, the woman on the other side isn’t their sister.

*

Seulgi and Yesol tuck their luggage away in the spare bedroom of the flat, guided by the woman who answered the door. Then they’re invited to the dining area, next to the kitchen, where the woman proceeds to cook them a late lunch. She’s very pretty , Seulgi thinks, if a bit begrudgingly. Of course she knows who this woman is. How could she not? Which is why every now and then she glances awkwardly at Yesol, wondering if her younger sister understands the depth of the situation they’ve found themselves in. For her part, Yesol seems mostly unbothered, if a little shy at being in a room with no one but her sister and someone who is, essentially, a total stranger.

They hear the front door burst open, followed by a rumble of voices and exuberant footsteps. Seulgi and Yesol start, but the woman cooking them lunch remains unperturbed.

“That should be your sister,” she tells them, waving her spatula in what she probably thinks is a soothing manner. Her smile is a bit shy and her voice is soft. 

Sure enough, their eldest sister walks into the room wearing a neon yellow and grey soccer kit soaked through with sweat, her black socks smeared with grass stains. She’s too busy looking at the woman cooking them lunch to notice her siblings in the corner.

As if on cue, the woman wrinkles her nose at the new arrival. “Byul-ah, you stink.”

Byul smirks, her eyes gleaming with the light of some mysterious challenge, and then she lunges forward, tackling the woman in a vigorous embrace, rubbing dirt and sweat all over her as she presses eager, sloppy kisses to her up her neck and in the shell of the woman’s ears.

The woman yelps, dropping the spatula on the counter and trying to push Byul away giggling and squealing all the while, but she doesn’t seem to be trying very hard, because soon her arms are looped around their sister’s neck and her hands are curved around her waist and they’re completely making out, grinning against each other’s lips.

“Good game?” the woman murmurs, barely breaking the kiss to speak.

“The best,” Byul replies, leaning in closer with renewed enthusiasm. Her fingers slip under the bottom of the woman’s shirt, slowly sliding upward, squeezing and caressing her bare skin.

Seulgi is more than a little bit scandalized, but it’s nothing compared to Yesol’s reaction. “The chicken is burning,” she announces in the sour tones of a pre-teen who just watched her sister bypass her in favor of someone they don’t even know. 

The instant Moon Byulyi realizes they aren’t alone, she lets go of the other woman like she’s on fire and takes several steps back, a blush rising to her pale cheeks.

“You could have told me my siblings were here,” she mutters, glaring at her companion.

The woman doesn’t miss a beat, raising both eyebrows and voice turning just a hair too innocent. “How would that be funny?”

Byul turns even redder, glaring at the other woman without any real heat in her eyes, but she soon collects herself enough to grin at both Seulgi and Yesol, apologizing for not being able to pick them up and not noticing them when she first came in. Byul makes as if to approach them for a hug or maybe a sisterly one-armed jostle but stops halfway, probably remembering that she’s still covered in sweat and dirt. Instead, she clears and finally addresses the elephant in the room. 

“Oh, uhm. You probably already met since she let you in, but this is Kim Yongsun. We live together.” She gestures to the other woman–Yongsun–  at the stove. Byul doesn’t say she’s her girlfriend, but the hand she instinctively touches to Yongsun’s hip makes that part infinitely clear, as well as the sudden brightening of her mood.

Soon Seulgi and Yesol find themselves being shooed out of the kitchen, with firm instructions to eat their lunch in the living room. They are promptly met by several inquisitive stares from the women gathered around the coffee table, all looking just as bedraggled as Byul.

“You must be Byulie’s siblings,” says a deep brown-haired woman, there’s an assured quality to her, confident and almost regal . “Seulgi and Yesol, yes?”

“Yes,” says Yesol, with just enough courtesy to bow alongside her sister before following up with. “Who’re you?”

The woman smiles. “I’m Chae Rina, and this is Kan Miyoun, Choi Sunghee, Lee Ayumi, and Kim Yubin.” She gestures at each one, and Seulgi’s feeling rather awkward about the whole thing, holding a plate of chicken and tteokbokki in her hands while a group of soccer players say their hellos. All of them comfortable with each other and mask-less, meanwhile Seulgi and Yesol still have their facemasks on from the train.

Finally, she and Yesol extricate themselves from the situation and take their seats at the living room sofa, eating while the women around them discuss the highlights of this afternoon’s game, which apparently involved a very smoothly executed maneuver between Byul and Ayumi.

Yongsun and Byulyi finally emerge from the kitchen to a variety of good-natured catcalls, brought on by the fresh hickey on the former’s neck.

“Just so you know, Yongsun, Byulie practically ran all the way from the park to here,” says Rina, obviously the team captain. “The way she does after every winning match, come to think of it.”

“Unnie, please!,” Byul practically whines, staring wide pleading eyes in front of her teammates, “not in front of my sisters.”

“Well,” the one called Ayumi continues, game face on, “we’re your sisters too, which makes them family, and family know all the embarrassing bits about each other.”

The group falls into silence, sending fleeting, amused glances her and Yesol’s way. It’s as if the dynamic has shifted to make space for them, and as the conversation resumes, with Yongsun steering it into more child-friendly territory, Seulgi listens with interest, trying to acquaint herself with the shape of her sister’s life.

ii.

She soon discovers that Top Girl, the name of her sister’s soccer team, hang around Yongsun and Byul’s apartment a lot, quite possibly because of its proximity to the park where they play soccer. It just so happens that the apartment is also quite central to the trendier side of Seoul, which is where Seulgi finds herself the next day after asking if she could take a walk around the neighborhood. She’d asked if Yesol wanted to come with, but the younger girl’s shyness was slowly giving way to familiarity and she seemed much more interested in sticking around to hear more soccer stories from their sister’s teammates.

It’s during her walk that she bumps into Yongsun again. Or rather, she spots Yongsun from afar, and panics for a bit, wondering if she should duck into a cafe and hide or turn around before she’s spotted. Unfortunately for her, Yongsun’s eyes dart up and spot her, waving happily before gesturing for her to walk over.

Seulgi sighs, she really doesn’t want to, but she knows that the polite thing to do would just be to get it over and done with. Besides, she’d rather this than having things be awkward at the apartment because she decided to ignore her sister’s girlfriend.

Once she’s near enough, she realizes that Yongsun is with two other women, both of whom are smiling from behind their facemasks once she stops just a couple of feet away.

“Seulgi-ah, this is Wheenie and Hyejinie. They’re our friends,” Yongsun says warmly. It doesn’t escape Seulgi’s notice how Yongsun says ‘our’, not ‘my’ or ‘mine and Byul’s’. Our. As if including her into the group is already second nature even after barely a few days of knowing her.

“Finally I get to meet Byulie-unnie’s sisters!” Wheein says. Her hair is dyed a deep blue, which shines brightly in the midday sun, Seulgi finds herself drawn to the color. 

“Much prettier than Byulie-unnie too, as expected.” Hyejin adds, winking at Seulgi conspiratorially. “You’re in University, right?”

That’s how Seulgi finds herself making surprisingly pleasant conversation with her older sister’s friends. When they ask her to tell them about her student life, their eyes perk up and they listen attentively, asking all the right questions and looking to be genuinely interested in what she has to say. Unlike her aunts and uncles back home, who ask once and then stir the conversation elsewhere when her answers don’t quite meet their expectations.

It feels all too soon, then, that Hyejin and Wheein bid their leave, mentioning something about another schedule they have in a few hours. They don’t stop waving until they’ve turned the corner and are out of sight.

“I introduced them to Byul when she first moved out here,” Yongsun says to her, “now the three of them gang up on me all the time. It drives me a little crazy.” Her eyes crinkle, the only indication that Yongsun is smiling, “Your sister just loves causing mischief.”

“You would know better than me.”

Seulgi feels herself grow cold in mortification. The words had just tumbled past her lips and now she can’t take them back. When she chances a glance back at Yongsun, the older woman looks a bit sad, but she’s still smiling, or at least, Seulgi thinks she is, because Yongsun offers the crook of her elbow and says, “Want to have bingsu with me before we head back?”

The bingsu cafe is quite packed, but that’s to be expected since it’s summer. By some miracle though, they manage to get a table inside with the air conditioning. Not that Seulgi would have noticed anyway. She’s been feeling cold ever since the thoughtless comment she made earlier in the street. 

When Yongsun returns with their orders, they eat in silence for a while, the sweet dessert doing little to calm Seulgi’s nerves as she waits for what is obviously a stern talking-to.

Which is why, the next words that come from Yongsun’s mouth come as a bit of a shock, “I’d like to apologize.”

Seulgi looks up from her bingsu in surprise, eyes going wide. “What for?”

“I know you don’t–” Yongsun hesitates, “–like me very much. And that’s okay.  You’re not obligated to or anything, especially not since…” she hesitates again, looking for the right words. Seulgi does her the courtesy of waiting patiently. 

“Byul-ah told me what happened when she tried to tell your parents about me.” Yongsun’s eyes are staring at something just past Seulgi’s left shoulder. Perhaps remembering that time from years ago.  Seulgi can certainly remember it from her own point of view. Even now it was a painful memory to think back on.

“I know it must have felt like she was choosing me over your family.” Yongsun says, her tone very careful, “which is why I wanted to tell you that nothing hurt her more than leaving all of you and moving out here.”

There are lots of words Seulgi wants to say, things she’d planned on saying should the opportunity present itself, but she doesn’t. Sometime between the train ride and seeing her sister happier than she can ever remember, she finds that any bitterness and resentment she had carried before was already long gone. 

“I’ve wanted nothing for Byul but the chance for her to reconcile with all of you. She loves you guys so much,” Yongsun says, “when your mother called asking if you and Yesol could spend the summer here, I practically forced her to agree. She was so afraid that neither of you wanted to see her.”

It takes her a while to process all the information she’s being given. So Seulgi just nods and takes a bite of her bingsu, some of the ice has already melted, creating a soup of sweet milk and red beans. There’s something warm building up in her chest, but she doesn’t think she’s quite ready to process those feelings yet so she tucks them aside for a later day.

“So I’m really grateful that you’re here,” Yongsun finishes, this time with a shy little smile, “and it might take a while, but I hope that someday, you and I can be friends too.”

She nods and finally, Seulgi feels herself smile too. The genuineness of it is like a weight off her chest.

“Can I call you, Unnie?”

Yongsun’s responding smile is bright enough to rival the summer sun.

*

Later that night, Byul and Yong cook dinner for the four of them together. Every now and then, Byul will make a cheesy remark or a greasy statement that makes Yong roll her eyes or cringe so hard Seulgi’s afraid her face is going to get stuck that way. 

Yesol pretends to gag, but Seulgi thinks it’s kind of sweet, thinks it’s been so long since she’s seen her sister’s mouth curve in anything that wasn’t a frown or a disdainful smirk. After dinner, she continues to watch the two of them clean up. Unlike earlier, when they were aware they had an audience, now Byul and Yong are less playful but the connection between them is no less evident. 

Instead of focusing on the Netflix movie that she’s supposed to be watching with Yesol, Seulgi watches Byul and Yong talk quietly and amicably between the two of them. Their words calm and low. The whole thing was so achingly domestic that it took Seulgi a while to realize that it reminded her of how her own parents would talk to each other when they thought their children weren’t around. 

Eventually the two of them join them in the living room for the movie and it’s…nice. Seulgi smiles, settling in between her older and younger sister as if this was something they did every weekend instead of for the first time in over seven years. 

When the movie ends, Seulgi finds herself turning to Byul and saying, “Unnie, would you like to sleep in mine and Yesol’s room tonight?”

You never visit; you never call , is what she means. This is the first time we’ve seen each other in years. You scare me sometimes, because you’re family but I don’t know who you are.

Byul stills beside her. She tilts her head at Seulgi, regarding her with the dark eyes that the younger girl sees every time she looks into a mirror. She catches the way Byul glances quickly at Yong, and how the older girl just nods and smiles encouragingly.

When Byul turns to look back at her, she’s smiling too as she nods. 

Later, after Byul says good night to Yong and closes the door of the guest bedroom behind her, Seulgi asks, “How did you meet Yongsun-unnie?” She’s careful to keep her voice light and neutral, doing her best not to scare her sister off, or make her think this is anything other than genuine curiosity. 

She must hear it in her voice because Byul says, “Get on the bed, I can tell you all about it.”

It’s a tight fit on the guest bedroom’s mattress, with Yesol nestled between her sisters as she burrows into the eldest one’s side. They laugh awkwardly, trying to rearrange themselves into more comfortable positions. The bed creaks. The three of them are bigger now, no longer used to the cramped spaces of childhood.

Seoul feels quiet tonight. Seulgi thinks that, if she strains her ears, she’ll be able to hear the song of the distant hum of the city as it continues to hustle and bustle outside the apartment, but she’s too busy listening to Byul’s smoky voice in the darkness as she takes them through seven tempestuous years.

“Yong and I met when I was doing part time work at a radio station here. You probably wouldn’t remember because you were still in school then, it was around the time you were getting into piano playing–”

“You remember that?” Seulgi asks, a little mortified that her sister remembers such an awkward phase of her life.

Byul smiles, “I remember the important things,” she winks, and then picks up where she left off, “–anyway I was staying at our grandparents’ house a lot during those days. Yong was also doing part time work and we ended up arguing about who would get to sit-in during the broadcasts. Eventually we realized that there were schedules for who would get to do that and we were both scheduled together so it felt a bit silly to have fought about it in the first place. Still I found out it was fun trying to get a rise out of her so I ended up annoying her more often than not. Then one day she must have had enough of my bad jokes because she cut me off by saying ‘if you’re just gonna flirt with me and not do anything about it, let me know so I can at least make the first move.’”

Byul laughs at her last sentence but what she really means, with every word, is: This is my life. This is what you missed. I’m sorry.

“And you’re happy?” Seulgi asks when Byul finishes with her multiple anecdotes of their seven-year relationship. “I mean, she makes you happy, right?”

It’s a loaded question. She doesn’t hold any resentment for Byul and Yong or their relationship anymore, but she at least wants the reassurance that all of it wasn’t for nothing. Since her sister wasn’t around for the last seven years, hopefully she at least spent that time with someone who loved and took care of her as much as her family would have. 

Byul chuckles. “We both drive each other a little crazy. And sometimes when we fight things get a bit intense. But even if we fight, we try to make sure it’s not enough to ruin what we have.”

“I’m happy for you,” Seulgi says, closing her eyes, and what she means is: I forgive you, my sister.

iii.

Top Girl practically adopt Yesol as one of their own. She shows up to every soccer match, their little energetic cheerleader, and Seulgi keeps an eye on her, but her attention is always irrevocably drawn to their sister, who throws herself into every game with ferocious zeal, unafraid to slide over the mud to score a goal. The sight fills her with a great amount of admiration and pride.

On the rare occasions that Yong joins the sisters on the sidelines, she rivals Yesol in her zeal for the game, always shouting at her girlfriend to ‘just make the damn goal already!’ and yelling just as loud whenever Byul scores a point. Byul doesn’t seem too pleased with her girlfriend’s cheers, but she always sits beside Yong during half-time. Whenever the whistle blows again, Yong usually pulls her in for a messy good-luck kiss, which Byul returns with equal fervor, her dirt-stained fingers tangling in her hair, before tearing herself away and running back to the field, while Yong returns to her seat like nothing happened.

“It’s always so exciting,” Yong once says to Seulgi during a time-out in the game. “I’m always on the edge of my seat for her.”

*

During one of the matches, Seulgi finds herself sitting next to Rina during the half-time. The older woman doesn’t try and engage her in energetic conversation like the rest of Top Girl have during those situations, but the silence isn’t awkward at all.

Down below, both Yong and Yesol are busy fussing over Byul, who had taken a nasty hit by the ball to her gut earlier in the match.

“They’re quite the match aren’t they?” comes a voice from beside her and Seulgi looks up to see Rina looking fondly at the sight before them. 

“You know,” the older woman continues, “when she first joined the team, i didn’t even know Byulie had anyone. There was an anger and a sadness to her that we saw in between matches. Something me and the other girls couldn’t fill no matter how hard we tried.

Before the guilt and sadness could bring Seulgi under, Rina finally looked at her and smiled.

“Then, one day, during a smaller game, Yongsun showed up just before the match started. Before we knew what was happening Byulie was crying and hugging her. Later she told us it was because she was just happy to see Yongsun there.”

They both look back towards the couple in question. Yong’s hands keep fluttering toward Byul’s abdomen. As if she wants to check it but is afraid to touch in case she causes more damage. There’s a frightened look in her eyes that speaks volumes about the amount of concern she has for Byul.

“It was on that day that I knew our Byulie was never really alone.” Rina finishes. Seulgi nods in agreement, suddenly feeling thankful in ways she can’t fully describe.

*

When they get to the apartment, Seulgi’s good mood is instantly shattered when Yong and Byul suddenly start arguing. It starts with Yong telling Byul to lie down, the latter disagreeing and instead insisting on going out again to pick up dinner from a new pasta place that just opened in the neighborhood. It devolves into a full-fledged argument from there and Seulgi and Yesol stand awkwardly to the side. Unsure of what to do.

It isn’t until Seulgi really starts listening to the fight that she realizes she actually has nothing to worry about.

“You were hurt Byul, you need to rest!” Yong says, voice growing louder with every word.

“I said I’m fine. You saw that I was fine, why can’t you drop it!” Byul counters, exasperatedly.

“You could barely stand up when that ball hit you!”

“Well maybe I would’ve been able to dodge if someone wasn’t yelling their lungs out at me from the stands, distracting me all the time!”

Seulgi resists the urge to laugh. She finds a box of instant mac-and-cheese in the pantry and she sets about making dinner. The inevitable commotion distracts the couple from their fight, and from her spot at the kitchen island, Seulgi sees the way Yong and Byul share a look and then smile, both their heads shaking in unison as they let out matching chuckles. The tension from the fight already dissipating.

“Since you traumatized my sisters by causing a commotion, it’s only fair that you do the dishes after dinner.” Byul says, nudging her girlfriend on the ribs.

“What?” says Yong, her voice turning defensive. “If anything, I was setting a good example for them about what not to do if they sustain an injury.”

“I’m not even going to bruise. And some good example you are, screaming like a madwoman during every match.”

“Well if you’d only get in the game and steal the ball–”

Seulgi exchanges a knowing smile with Yesol, and she finishes mixing the cheese sauce to the sound of bickering. She’s always thought that people in their twenties have their together, but Byul and Yong are steadily proving her wrong. These two are idiots.

iv.

Summer for Seulgi becomes sunlight on city streets and watching her sister play soccer. Eating tteokbokki from stalls after accompanying Yong on grocery runs and then watching Netflix on the TV in the living room after dinner. One day she finds herself beside Yong on the bleachers while Top Girl do practice runs on the field. Yesol is on the grass too with her own ball, copying everything her sister does with much concentration.

“At first she was terrible at it,” Yong remarks.

“Unnie?” asks Seulgi, meaning her older sister.

Yong nods. “She met Rina-unnie at the station where we worked and they became friends,” Yong explains patiently. “They got to talking about hobbies and Unnie invited Byul-ah to join them for a practice game. She’s been in love with the sport ever since.”

Byul walks up to them, placing a hand on Yong’s shoulder. “The rest of the team are taking Yesol to Han River later after practice. Do you want to join them, Seulgi-ah?“

Seulgi looks up at her sister then at Yong. She hasn’t been to the Han yet, and she’d always wanted to go but a part of her also wants to stay and not miss a minute with her sister. Even if it means just spending their time back at home.

“Let’s all go,” Yong suggests, catching her eye.

Byul starts to argue, something about wanting to watch a singing competition where her favorite female idol is the judge but then the whistle blows for the second half of practice and Yong grabs the front of Byul’s jersey and tugs her down for her customary good-luck kiss. It’s a little more heated than usual, possibly because she’s trying to shut Byul up, and it works. By the time she pushes her away, Byul is wearing a dazed expression on her face. Her teammates yell at her to get a move on, and she starts jogging backwards, still staring at girlfriend. Yong smirks, and Byul shakes her head as if to clear it, before turning around and hurling herself back onto the field.

Yong nudges Seulgi. “Sometimes your big sister just needs a reminder.”

*

The Han River is not as crowded as Seulgi thought it would be given that it’s a summer weekend. There are people about, families, friend groups, and people jogging or bike riding or skateboarding here and there. Nearer the water there's a group of University students in fancier clothes with fancy and expensive looking cameras, taking golden hour pictures of each other. 

Their feet leave concrete for grass, and Seulgi lets Yong and Byul  walk on ahead. They look good together, a study of contrasts. Although both are lean and slender, Byul’s style is cool and confident, tomboyish and androgynous in a way that looks effortless, while Yong’s fashion leans more toward the feminine side, in a cropped cardigan that looks to be one bad stretch away from the front buttons popping open and exposing everything. They shimmer like jewels in the mellow afternoon light pouring into the river, which traces their silhouettes in shards of amber against the greyish waters. It would be picturesque, if they weren’t arguing at the top of their voices.

“I can’t believe I let you talk me out of missing my show for this. I could be watching Taeyeon on TV right now.”

“Ever heard of YouTube? Taeyeon is there any time you want to see her.“

Yesol touches Seulgi’s arm. “Aren’t they sweet?” she coos.

Seulgi’s thinking about what Byul had told them before, about her and Yong fighting. “How can two people fight all the time but still manage to stay together?”

“It’s a mystery,” Yesol jokes, but when she notices how solemn her older sister is, she tries to answer her question in all seriousness. “I think every good relationship is a matter of knowing the difference between what’s worth fighting about and what’s worth fighting for. Yong-unnie’s been there for Byulie-unnie longer than we have. So I think we don’t have anything to worry about. Our sister is in good hands.”

Seulgi wraps an arm around her little sister, “Since when did you get so wise, huh?”

“I’ve always been this way,” Yesol teases, “you just never noticed before.”

The group eventually find a spot and start to spread out their blankets and relax on the grass, the world takes on the quality of glass: soft and delicate under a lavender sky, sharper and clearer where the river flows unceasingly towards the sea.

Somehow, the topic turns to the saddest movies everyone has ever watched. Each of them taking a turn to share. When it’s Byul’s turn, she spends a good long while thinking about it before finally saying, “The Little Prince.”

“The animated movie?” Ayumi asks, laughter in her voice. Byul nods from where she’s lying down on Yong’s lap.

The couple have a blanket all to themselves; Yong is absentmindedly running her fingers through Byul’s hair while her girlfriend rests her head on her lap. Byul had firmly insisted that this position was the most practical given that she wanted to lie down but Yong wanted to sit, and Yong had let herself be persuaded, putting up no more than the token amount of resistance.

“What’s so sad about an animated movie?” Yubin asks.

“Animated movies can be sad!” Byul says, defensively. “It means a lot more when you’ve read the book, but in the movie, there’s a part where the Little Prince loses his way and he grows into a sad adult. After the little girl saves him, they return to his planet only to find that his Rose was gone.”

“And the little girl felt so guilty, because she thought she had given the Little Prince false hope, and that there was no one who would love him in his home,” continues Byul, and that’s when Seulgi’s gaze slides fully to her own sister, who’s more at peace than Seulgi’s ever seen her look, who’s lying down on Yong’s lap with no trace of the different masks she usually wears.

And in the absence of those masks, it’s easier to pick up on the hint of sadness in Byul’s voice when she murmurs, “She thought the Little Prince had no one, but as the sun rose, he remembered that the love he felt for his rose was inside, and that no one could take that away from him.”

As if she senses the shift in her mood, Yong’s hand moves from Byul’s hair to her shoulder, her thumb rubbing calming circles into the skin in a gesture of comfort.

v.

The tone of summer changes, in that effervescent way that life can gradually alter in the blink of an eye. Seulgi’s gotten used to the pattern of large groups, at the park, in Yong and Byul’s apartment. It takes her a bit off her guard then when she emerges from a refreshing shower in the bathroom to find a seemingly empty apartment.

“Yesol?” She calls out first, and then “Unnie?”

Byul’s head pops out from where she had apparently been lying down on the sofa. “Yong took Yesol out to go shopping for some accessories for when she goes back to school. Did you need something?”

Seulgi shakes her head. Suddenly unsure what to do. She and Yesol had plans to watch a movie together, but that could always wait until her sister comes back from her shopping trip. As if sensing her awkwardness, Byul sits up on the sofa and beckons her over.

It’s awkward for a few short seconds, and then they both end up laughing at the silliness of it all. When the laughter dies down, the silence that follows is a lot more comfortable, only broken by Byul’s soft voice when she asks: “How are they?”

Seulgi doesn’t have to ask who she means. She looks at her sister meaningfully before responding. “They’re great. Mom still goes shopping during the weekends. Dad is still working, but he doesn’t go out into the field as much anymore, so he has more time to take the dogs out for walks.”

“Dogs?”

Seulgi pulls out her phone in her pocket, and taps through to the gallery to pull up a photo. “Yeahp, we have corgis now. Daebak, Haengwoon, and Kongang.”

She watches her sister’s expression and there’s a sad smile there, easily masked by her cooing over the adorable photo of three Welsh Corgis. She shows Byul more photos of their dogs from when they were puppies, and does her sister the mercy of pretending not to notice when her voice gets thick and a few errand tears stream down her face.

“Why don’t you and Yong-unnie get a dog?” Seulgi asks.

“We’re about to,” Byul says, tears already secretly wiped away, “the adoption process takes a long time you know, especially for strays.”

“Strays?”

Byul nods. “Yeah, we ended up volunteering at this animal shelter together last year, and we’ve been back a few times since. At first we couldn’t choose between two dogs but then we decided to just get both of them, which meant that the wait and the processing time takes twice as long. You’ll probably be back at Daejeon by the time they arrive.”

Seulgi nods, and there’s a lump in that she can’t swallow past. Why would you say that? she thinks with a hint of resentment. Why would you ruin the moment when we both know perfectly well that I-

“Oh,” she says out loud, her eyes widening as the realization sinks in.

Byul looks at her and smiles a little lopsided grin, an expression Seulgi has come to associate with no one else but her big sister. “Yes?” she says patiently.

“I don’t want to leave.” Seulgi says, the words come out sounding slightly annoyed, through a dry mouth and a tentative tongue.

Byul’s lips curve into a full-fledged smile, like she’s been waiting all summer for her to say that, like she’s been waiting for her to take the last step between the seven year barrier that used to be between them. When Byul stands up to heat up the leftover pizza in the fridge, Seulgi catches sight of a tattoo on the back of her sister’s arm. It’s the first time she’s seen it this summer but she would know it anywhere because she sees the exact photo it was based on everyday back at her home in Daejeon. 

On her parents’ mantelpiece where a family photo of all of them still stood even after their parents kicked her sister out for falling in love with a woman. 

*

A few nights afterward, she wakes up to a commotion coming from the living room. After she’s assured herself that the voices are familiar and the apartment is not being broken into by exceptionally clumsy thieves, Seulgi leaves the bedroom, but not without checking to make sure Yesol is still fast asleep.

The scene that greets her in the living room is comical: Yong is trying to haul a very drunk Byul across the carpet, a long-suffering expression on Yong's face as Byul drapes herself all over her. Wheein and Hyejin are by the door, looking amused and shooting Seulgi matching little waves before turning to leave, closing the door behind them

Byul stumbles, and Yong catches her in her arms. “This is what you get for challenging Wheein-ah to a drinking game,” she admonishes. “I hope you’re happy.”

“I’m ecstatic,” Byul slurs. She starts peppering Yong’s jaw with little kisses, but she firmly extricates herself and drags Byul by the hand in the direction of their bedroom.

As the couple pass by Seulgi, Yong gives her a curt nod. “Look. This is your sister,” she says dryly.

Seulgi grins. “I wouldn’t have her any other way.”

Before Yong can reply, Byul gets a second-wind of energy and spins them around so that Yong has her back against their bedroom door.

“Come on,” Byul purrs in her raspy voice. “We can do that thing you like. I might even beg for it.”

Yong turns beet-red. “Byul! Your sister is-”

Byul captures Yong’s lips in an open-mouthed kiss. Seulgi’s standing close enough to see teeth and tongue, and, okay , this is not what she signed up for this vacation. Yong pulls away, long enough to wipe at her lips but there’s a challenge in her eyes now. When she leans in again, the kiss is a lot less messy but a lot more intense. By the time Byul fumbles with the doorknob, Yong has already divested her of her leather jacket. She manages to get the door open, and Yong pulls away again.

They stare at each other, breathing heavily in the dim bluish glow of the streetlights streaming in through the window, rendered completely unaware of the other person  in the living room who is watching them with more than a little mortification.

Byul’s glassy dark eyes focus somewhat. “Love you, ddun!” she happily exclaims, pressing a sloppy kiss against Yong’s cheek. Yong laughs, and the bedroom door shuts behind them.

vi.

The next morning, Seulgi knocks cautiously on the door of Yong and Byul’s bedroom.

“Come in,” says Yong.

“I made coffee,” Seulgi announces, carrying the steaming mug inside.

Yong and Byul are sitting up in bed, both thankfully clothed. Byul’s glaring at her girlfriend with baleful, bleary eyes.

“Why did you let me drink that much?” she whines.

“Because you were the one who challenged Wheeinie and no one could talk you out of it,” Yong tells her. “It wasn’t that humiliating of a loss, don’t worry.”

Byul takes the coffee from Seulgi. She sips tentatively before blinking. “Cream and three sugars. You remembered.”

“I remember the important things,” Seulgi says.

Byul tries to smile, but it tapers off into a grimace, as if another jolt of pain has darted through her head. Yong reaches out to comb her fingers through Byul’s hair in a soothing motion, gently kneading her scalp. She leans into the touch, and Yong brushes her lips over her temple, the look in her eyes so tender that it almost seems like a private moment, wrapped in early morning light.

Seulgi backs away, preparing to leave the room because she feels like an intruder. But her older sister’s question stops her in her tracks.

“Are you visiting again next summer?”

“Um…”

Byul and Yong gaze at her expectantly. Seulgi looks at them and thinks about that night seven years ago, how different things seem now. She thinks about how happy Yesol seemed surrounded by a whole new group of Unnies who never hesitates to dote on her whenever possible. She thinks about how Yong always shares an exasperated look with her whenever Byul makes cheesy comments.

And she thinks about the sister who had seemed so far away, but who- maybe, just maybe- had been waiting for Seulgi to find her all along.

She takes a deep breath. “How does Winter break sound?”

Byul takes another sip of coffee, looking both surprised and gratified. “Great,” she rasps. “That would be really great.”