Chapter Ten

My Dahyun.

After that brief argument and a lovely conclusion to the conversation, Sana and Dahyun decided to take a rest. Sana, on the other hand, was getting a physical rest as she lies peacefully on her side, facing Dahyun. Her eyes were becoming heavier with each passing second, making the other smile.

Dahyun is likewise reclining on her side, facing Sana. However, she is using one arm to support her head, already content to see the love of her life on the edge of falling asleep.

"Hmm," Sana hummed, slightly smiling when she noticed Dahyun doing the same, despite her eyes becoming a little unfocused.

"That's making me drowsier," Sana whispered when the girl reached out to touch the side of her face, softly rubbing a thumb across her cheek.

Dahyun giggled as if this was her purpose all along. "Then sleep, babe," she replied, continuing her small act of affection. "I'll be here for you when you wake up."

"Do you promise?"

"Of course," Dahyun said promptly, bobbing her head twice. "I just want to watch you."

"Do you know you seem sweeter whenever we dispute over something?" Sana asked, and it was only then that Dahyun realized it was true. She's not sure if it's just a part of her nature: pushing someone away, then when that person pulls her back, she will go and love even more tenderly than ever.

"You should rest for a bit too, though," Sana said, battling her sleepiness in order to converse to Dahyun more. Of course, the other person was aware of it. She even thinks it's cute, especially now that Sana has yawned and apologized in a tiny voice.

"This is how I rest," Dahyun said, looking lovingly at Sana's face as if trying to remember every detail of it. "Just seeing you takes away all my exhaustion."

"See? You talk to me like that, and you want me to believe you when you say I should leave," Sana whined, slightly raising her voice, puckering her lips afterward. "You should stop lying to me and show me what you're feeling. If I can't be of comfort or aid, please let me stay, at the very least."

"But you're not really staying," Dahyun shrugged, her lips pursed. Her thumb, on the other contrary, never ceased caressing Sana's face.

"What are you on about?"

"You'll have to return to the city the next morning," Dahyun stated, her eyes showing a tinge of sadness despite her best efforts to suppress it. "What will happen to us?"

"I'm talking about remaining here, Dahyun," Sana stated before poking the girl's heart out of her chest with her index finger. "Ah," she murmured, pulling her hair out with one hand. "As much as I'd like to stay here and enjoy this moment with you for a little longer, I—"

Dahyun placed a finger on top of Sana's lips to stop the girl from talking.

"It's not like you're not coming back, aren't you?"

"If given the chance I'll fit you inside my luggage."

"Excuse me, are you lowkey shading me?"

Sana began laughing as that wasn't something she was trying to say at all. "I didn't say that because you are small!"

"You just did!" 

"You made this whole supposed romantic exchange seem so ridiculous!" Sana couldn't help giggling, so the other simply rolled her eyes. She did, however, eventually join in on the laughter later on.

"But, Dahyun, on a serious note," Sana finally managed to pull off a serious look, but the other girl couldn't stop smiling, so she received a little smack on the arm. "Stop laughing! I swear to God!" cried Sana.

"I'm sorry," Dahyun apologized before closing .

"Would you want to accompany me to the airport tomorrow morning?"

Dahyun shook her head, a hesitant smile on her face. "No, I'll stay here," she answered, leading Sana's expression to drop. "You understand that you won't be able to go elsewhere if I'm there, don't you?" Dahyun sighed. The prospect of having to spend so many days without Sana by her side is already frustrating.

"If you truly want to go home, I'll have to stay right here."

Sana totally got what Dahyun was attempting to convey. Even if they switch positions, that appears to be the best option. Besides, Sana isn't thrilled with the idea of them being separated for an extended period of time. It feels like a goodbye, which she clearly hates.

"Okay, I'll message you before we go," Sana said, only to be met with a smile. "And when I arrive safely home."

"That's what I want," Dahyun acknowledged.

"Now, come here," Sana motioned with both arms, implying something to the other. "Give me a cuddle!" she decided to say because Dahyun was only grinning at her in a teasing manner.

∙ ∙ ∙

Mina took a step back after pressing the doorbell button, placing herself aligned in Sana's position. When she realized her friend was noticeably silent, she exclaimed joyously, "Home sweet home!"

With a confused expression, Sana switched her attention to Mina. Ahri, who was inside her arms, did the same, wondering what was making Mina so delighted. His ears even twitched in curiosity. "I guess that's not something I'm supposed to say," Mina chuckled awkwardly.

"Sorry," Sana laughed a bit, not quite understanding what was going on. It's been a long journey back to the city, and she's lightheaded. "I'm at a loss for words," she said.

"You miss your home," Mina said as she looked through those eyes.

Sana then stared at the house in front of her, her gaze wandering all over it. "I think I do," she said quietly. She hadn't seen this place in a long time, yet nothing had changed. So, she could only say, "I suppose so."

"Fool," Mina said, shaking her head in befuddlement. Sana had heard her but was puzzled, so she waited for Mina to say something else. "I'm referring to Dahyun."

"Oh, my home," Sana shyly said before it sank into her mind. It made her breathe out deeply. "I do. I miss her so bad right now," she admitted. "I'm wondering what she's doing right now."

"Have you texted her yet?"

Sana shook her head, her gaze fixed on herself. "I have a lot to carry," she replied, making Mina laugh. "This one's quite heavy," she cutely cooed as Ahri glanced up at her, wanting to kiss the girl's nose.

"Just do it once we get inside," Mina repeated, instantly garnering her friend's agreement. She rang the doorbell again, assuming no one had heard it the first time. But then an older gentleman appeared, wiping his hands on the sides of his sweatshirt. "Oh, look, there he is."

Sana smiled, nodding her head, and said, "Hi, dad!" Before she could tell the guy how much she missed him, Ahri moved his body inside her hold as if he wanted to go down.

"Don't run away too far, okay?" she forewarned the small dog before kissing the top of its head and crouching down to let go. Ahri appeared to be absolutely ecstatic as he hopped out of the air while still in mid-flight. "Gosh," Sana said quietly to herself.

"Oh, you girls are finally back," the man warmly said as he opened the gate and embraced them. "How did your summer vacation go?"

"Sana had a summer job," Mina answered hastily, prompting the other to slap her on the bum.

"Hey, I told you to do something enjoyable," the man said, scratching the top of his head. "I don't want your mother to think that all I teach you is how to keep yourself occupied all the time."

"I don't think she took it that way," Sana puckered her lips, knowing that if she did, her father wouldn't be able to scold her any longer.

"Fine—" he was cut off by a little puppy rushing in through the gate. "Is that Ahri? The one you mentioned on the phone?" He seemed overjoyed about having new company around the house. "Look at him sniffing everything."

"Yeah. He'll start destroying them later," Sana answered, as if nothing was unusual, but her father was taken aback.

"That's correct," Mina said calmly.

"Well, everything but the plants," the man responded, only to notice Ahri peeing on one of the pots. "Oh, dear," was all he could say.

Sana was fixing hair, letting it fall on her back when she noticed something was missing. She looked down at her neck and whispered, "my locket," as she looked around. Sana spotted it a bit more away from them. "I thought I lost it," she said as she picked it up. Dahyun had won it for her at the amusement park. That is why it had become so significant to her.

She knew it would be empty, yet she opened it for some reason. "Dahyun," she said to herself, her eyes widening in astonishment. She truly did not expect to see Dahyun's photo in it. "She must have slipped it here when I was sleeping last night." Her heart had been touched by the thought. Thankfully, she heard Mina calling out to her before she got more emotional, "Sana, let's go inside." Sana looked at her friend, nodding her head in agreement. "Come in immediately, okay?"

"Yeah," Sana answered, staring down at the photo once more. She raised the locket over her lips, a little smile on her face. "You were correct. This one is preferable to huge bears," she said to herself, chuckling as she remembered her short conversation with the pale girl.

While unpacking her belongings, Sana waited for Dahyun to respond to a video call. She had only now realized she had brought home the school uniform blazer. "I completely forgot it was with my clothes," Sana said to herself as she clutched the back of her neck.

"Hi!"

After hearing that voice, her attention was drawn to her iPad. Dahyun's face is too near to the screen as if she wants to see Sana more closely. "Don't you seem a little far away from the camera?" the girl asked.

"Ah, sorry," Sana said before taking up the gadget and bringing it so near to her face that only her forehead could be visible.

"Wow," Dahyun said from the other side, causing Sana to laugh. "Your pores are also beautiful."

Sana took it from her face. They can see each other just enough now. "What are you doing?" Dahyun asked before allowing her back to fall to the bed's surface. Her phone smacked into her face as a result of that. "Aw!" she blurted out.

"Hey, are you okay?" Sana worried, but couldn't stop giggling anyway. "How come you can't be careful?"

"My nose hurts," Dahyun stated as she fixed the screen. "I'm sorry. You were the first person I ever called with video, and you are so damn lucky," she quipped.

"I'm not sure," Sana said with a displeased expression on her face to tease Dahyun. However, it did not work. The girl simply laughed at her. "I'm putting my clothes back in the cabinet."

"I just remembered I forgot to bring your jacket."

"Oh, it's okay. You are welcome to keep it."

"Are you sure you don't need it?" 

Dahyun only shook her head, which made Sana hum. "You should hang it where you can see it. So, you'll be reminded of me every day," she emphasized.

"That's a fantastic idea. I'll do that later."

"Aren't you a simp?" Dahyun teased, but all she got from Sana was a grimace, hence she continued, "I didn't realize I had that impact on you."

"You're such a bully."

Dahyun laughed, finally coming to a stop. "Babe, aren't you sleepy? "You've come a long way," she expressed her concern.

"No. I slept on the way here. Though, I'm still exhausted."

"Alright, do you want to talk till you're sleepy?"

"Certainly. Tell me anything."

Dahyun became silent for a moment, her lips puckering as she pondered something to say. "About that uniform," she began her story. "You were interested in it when we first met, weren't you?"

"Yeah, I'm still ashamed of myself for asking that question in such an awkward manner."

"I remember that," Dahyun said with a grin. "This time I'll get it straight."

"What about it?"

"It's not actually mine," she finally confessed. "It's my brother's old uniform, and I like wearing it."

"Why is that?" Sana's curiosity sparked after hearing the disclosure.

"I wanted to attend college."

Hearing the truth, on the other hand, crushed Sana's heart as well. It was the way Dahyun's eyes shone at the thought of doing something she had been forbidden to do. It was gone too quick.

"I wanted to study architecture alongside my high school buddies, the ones I mentioned to you and Mina — they were the ones who somehow made my life whole back then," Dahyun added, helpless of Sana's teary gaze. "But then, a week before the college entrance exam, I was taken to the hospital because I fainted; it wasn't the first, but I believed at that time I felt unwell, I was just fatigued. Then it turned out it was different."

"The next thing I knew, I had Acute Myeloid Leukemia, and the first thing that came out of my lips at the time was, what the is that? For heaven's sake, I had no idea. I didn't know it would take all my dreams — my life away from me."

Dahyun's face was all smiles for a short period. It would have been fine if she hadn't let a tear roll down her cheek. But she is still overwhelmed about it. "All of my friends passed the exam, and I was here inside my room, wondering why I couldn't live the life I desired any longer. It seemed like I was destined to be damned for all eternity; being sick felt like that to me."

"My brother is always a good man, Sana," Dahyun muttered, drawing a nod from the other. "He handed me his school uniform, which was the same as my friends' now, except they wore skirts," she explained. "But pants are cooler, anyway."

Sana could only remark, "You are so brave, Dahyun."

The pale girl beamed contentedly. It just feels wonderful to open out to someone you know you love and who loves you unconditionally. "And that, my beloved, is the story of my pretty unusual day-to-day wardrobe," she cracked a joke.

∙ ∙ ∙

Every day of their relationship progressed in this manner. Even once school started, Sana found time to speak to Dahyun at both ends of the day. Of course, the latter appreciates it greatly. She even felt Sana was the epitome of a dream wife, which the other girl finds ridiculous.

Dahyun had been Sana's happiness booster even on the most stressful days. Perhaps this is why she constantly wonders what will happen to her once the time comes for Dahyun to leave.

"Mina!" Sana yelled as she dashed down the stairs at nearly one o'clock in the morning. "Have you messaged mom? What did she say?" Mina became concerned and opened her inbox. "What?"

"No response anywhere yet," Mina said. "I told her to call Taehyung, and she said yes, but she hasn't replied ever since."

Sana began to cry and fell on her knees, crushing Mina's heart. "Calm down, this is nothing, maybe Dahyun is just busy with something," she attempted to reassure her friend, but it was pointless. "I don't know what to do, Sana," she said quietly.

But then, they heard a familiar tone from upstairs. Sana's phone was ringing. "Dahyun," the girl whispered, finally getting the strength to stand and hurry to her room. It is, in fact, a call from Dahyun.

"Hi, Sana—"

"Oh, my God, Dahyun!" Sana cried anew, probably relieved. "I was worried because you weren't returning my calls."

Dahyun did notice the tears in Sana's eyes and felt terrible. "I overslept, love, and I apologize."

"Please," Sana gasped for oxygen, finally able to handle herself, "stop doing that. Don't oversleep, okay?"

"I won't do it anymore," Dahyun said, her heart pained by the realization that she had caused Sana to cry once again. "I'm sorry," she apologized.

"It's okay. I'm okay," Sana answered, smiling and wiping away her tears. "Don't be concerned."

"I love you, Sana," Dahyun said softly, pouting her lips for a kiss and moving closer to the camera. That resulted in a genuine smile from Sana.

Of course, not every day may be a wonderful day. To be honest, Sana ought to have a great day today. And why did I say so?

She and Mina will be graduating from college today.

It's been over ten months of excruciating discomfort in their asses. This day is both a triumph and an escape if they would describe it.

"Sana, honey!" her father yelled from next to the front door. He'd been waiting for her daughter for an hour and a half, but she still hadn't shown up. "How long does the word wait truly last?"

"I'm on my way down!"

"Thank heavens you are," the man says to himself as he walks outdoors first.

Sana looked even more stunning as she came down the stairs today. She was holding both her phone and the iPad in one hand when both began to ring. She felt certain it was from Dahyun without even looking. 

Sana always preferred using the bigger gadget for calls so she could see the girl her love properly. "Why is the connection so slow?" she wondered as she walked to her car.

"Mina said she's already on the venue," her father said, prompting her to hum in response. "Come on in, the event is about to begin."

The call was finally connected once Sana was inside the vehicle. "Dahyunie!" she said, waving her empty hand.

It's been over ten months. It merely implies that Dahyun's condition has worsened.

She had been staying in the hospital, her body strapped with all the apparatus she needed to stay alive. Of course, Sana was aware of it. Dahyun never withheld anything from her anymore.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Sana said, sensing Dahyun's gaze.

"You're so beautiful," the pale girl said, and then a hand suddenly blocked the camera.

"What are you doing? I can't see you."

"Ah, sorry," Dahyun said as she moved her hand away. "I was holding your face through the screen, so pretty," she mumbled, touching the other girl's heart right away.

"Do you like me?" Sana jokingly asked.

"I even love you," Dahyun quickly responded as if she was very sure of it. "I had a pretty good dream of me and Ahri in that lake..."

Sana simply looked at her on the screen, recognizing a saddened expression in her eyes subsequently. "What's the matter?" she asked.

"There's nothing wrong, my love," Dahyun whispered softly, a tight smile on his face. "Are you coming back this summer vacation?"

"Of course, I am." Sana couldn't count the number of times she'd answered the same question for Dahyun, and it tears her heart to understand what it meant.

The main reason the girl fights every day of her life is that she wants to see Sana again. "I'm coming back for you," she spoke again.

"Don't be in a rush," Dahyun reminded her. "I'll be waiting for you."

Sana is aware of something else. Dahyun looks very much weaker today than she is the past days.

It pains Sana to ask this question, yet she felt compelled to do so. "Dahyun, are you tired?" a tear streamed from her eye.

"You shouldn't be crying, Sana."

"Just answer me."

Dahyun's ostensibly brief moment of quietness had lasted far longer than she had anticipated. She had pledged never to lie, so she replied honestly. "I'm very tired, Sana," she said. "But I'd like to see you one last time."

Sana couldn't keep her sobs to herself any longer, so she let Dahyun hear them. "I want the same thing," she mumbled. "So badly."

"That's why I'm holding on."

"However, seeing you like this..."

"It's okay, Sana; I can do this," Dahyun assured her calmly.

And then she had a respiratory distress followed by a sharp gasp of air. "Wear this first. Breathe for a bit," Taehyung said, his hands visible in the camera. "Are you okay?" asked the concerned man.

Sana closed her eyes and put her microphone on mute for a time as her sobs became uncontrollable. She is terrified, yet there is no one else who can take that feeling away except Dahyun.

"Sana," Dahyun eventually said after a long silence. "You should go about your day. Don't worry about me too much, okay? Today is a big day for you, so don't let anything ruin it."

All Sana could do was shake her head and murmur the word "no," repeatedly.

"I'll stop the call for the time being," Dahyun stated.

"Dahyun," Sana managed to say before the phone conversation was disconnected. "Are you simply waiting for the right moment to ask me?"

"Ask you what?" the pale girl asks, her voice faint as she glances down at her hand.

"To ask whether I'm fine with having you leave."

"Sana..."

"Please," Sana begged, hoping to get an answer.

"Yes." Dahyun sighed, biting her lower lip. "You were the best part of my life, Sana. Meeting you and having the opportunity to be loved by you made me feel like I already had such a long life. You did so much, so much, that maybe even when I'm reborn, I'll be capable of remembering you."

It may be difficult to hear, but this is how this love was created. And this is how this love will come to an end.

"I honestly don't know whether I can endure a week or even a day," Dahyun said, her head down. "If I had an option, I would choose to live longer. Perhaps till the end of the summer will suffice. I just need a little more time with you. You understand, don't you?"

"I do, Dahyun."

"I know you would."

"And I do understand that I should let you go now."

Dahyun's smile was arguably the most genuine she'd ever had in a long time. It seemed as if she was longing for this moment to arrive – this moment of freedom. "Thank you, Sana," she said very quietly.

"I will overcome all types of pain for you, my Dahyun," she said, even though it was difficult for her to express.

Dahyun nodded her head, her heart b with happiness. "Could you do me a favor?" she requested. "That you'll grow old... for both of us."

"I'll do it," Sana uttered. "I love you."

"I love you, Sana. Please catch our dream."

After those words, Sana took the decision to interrupt the call. She is just unable to breathe, and her heart was in so much pain. Love and suffering are not the same thing, yet sometimes it feels like they should be. They insist that they should be.

"Bro," Dahyun said to the man who sat beside him, his head was looking down. He'd been biting his lips and tightening his hands the entire time, simply to keep himself from crying. He'd heard it all, and it is now time for him to let her little sister go. "It's okay to let those tears fall now."

Only those words were enough to make Taehyung start crying in front of Dahyun. He shook his head, not wanting this moment to occur, but now it is here.

"You will always be my best friend," Dahyun added, reaching out to secure her grip on his hand. "I suppose you should contact our parents right now." She wore the mask for a short period of time to assist her breathing.

When she closed her eyes, she remembered Sana. And she will never not think of her from this moment and on. Simply because she promised Sana that the last breath, she'll ever breathe will be for her.

[fin.]