“Yongguk-sunbaenim, I've been looking for you!“, she says cheerily.

 

“I know, Hyosung told me. Did something happen?“

 

“Actually... I was curious. Why did you pick me?“

 

“For... what? The song?“

 

She nods, looking down shyly and kneading her fingers. Yongguk feels the incredible urge to hold her, but he just inhales deeply, leaning down a bit to come face to face with her, smiling.

 

“It's one of my own songs, so naturally I only want the very best vocalist to sing it.“

 

She looks at him and he could see doubt in her eyes.

 

“But there are other girls who sing much better than me“, she explains quietly.

 

“I've spent quite a lot of time not singing but only listening during singing class, so believe me, I know what I'm talking about. You're the only girl I want to have in my performance.“

 

For a few more long seconds they stare at each other again before a shy smile blooms on Jieun's perfect face and she tiptoes, quickly pecking Yongguk's cheek. It's barely more than her lips slightly grazing his skin but the sudden bolt of electricity that rushes through his body startles Yongguk and he involuntarily shies away. He watches speechlessly as Jieun bites her lower lip, her cheeks turning red before she mumbles a quick apology, running into the school building again.

 

A second later it hits him and Yongguk would've kicked is own if that would've been possible. How could he be so stupid? What did he think? Did he even think? Suddenly, the day isn't so bright and nice anymore. He continues his festival activities, helping out at the songwriting workshop until 9pm when everyone could finally go home. Throughout the past hours Yongguk had pulled out his phone again and again, dialing Jieun's number, but she wasn't picking up. He sighed every time. This was just like their "Going Crazy" performance, just without acting it and it made him feel like someone was driving knives into his chest.

 

Stepping out into the dimly lit darkness of another cold October night Yongguk pulls his jacket tighter around his body, walking over the school ground with Himchan.

 

"Dude, you don't look good you know?" his flatmate says after a few minutes of silent walking and Yongguk sighs.

 

"I think I screwed up with Jieun", he says slowly, causing Himchan to stop walking in the middle of the street, staring at him.

 

"What... what happened?" he asks surprised and his best friend runs a hand through his red hair looking despaired.

 

"I... I don't know. She asked me why I picked her for my song and then I said I picked her because she's the best singer and then she kissed me on the cheek and I was surprised and stepped backwards and I think she thought that I didn't want it, that I didn't like it, which is wrong but I was too startled to say anything and then she apologized and left and I couldn't find her anymore and she's not picking up her phone and now I think I just really really REALLY screwed up!"

 

"Was that Zelo's speed rapping?"

 

"Shut up, do I look like I think this is funny?" Yongguk hisses, angrily pushing past his flatmate.

 

"Yeah, sorry... that came out wrong", Himchan apologizes, hurrying to keep up with his friend. "So, what are you going to do now?"

 

Yongguk shrugs, turning right and into their street, pulling out his keys and opening the door. Himchan follows him up the stairs and closes their apartment door behind them.

 

"Are you hungry, hyung? I could make something quickly", he offers but Yongguk shakes his head and smiles.

 

"No need to be motherly all of a sudden", he says walking towards the couch and picking up the controllers lying there, holding one  out towards Himchan. "Come on, I need a victim."

 

Returning the smile he sits down on the floor in front of the TV next to Yongguk, both of them leaning their backs against the couch. Himchan feels like saying something, but he knows his best friend too well, so he remains silent, accepting the fact that Yongguk doesn't want to talk now.

 

 

---

 

 

 

It's Saturday morning and Yongguk wakes up to the sound of someone talking. Himchan, definitely. But who is he talking to? He couldn't make out a second voice. He's on the phone maybe. Staring at the ceiling he frowns when all of a sudden there is another voice. He couldn't understand what it says and it's only a single sentence, but it sounds familiar. He just couldn't match it neither with a name nor with a face. With a sigh he sits up, throwing his legs out of bed, stretching and yawning as he stumbles out of his room in boxer shorts and a plain t-shirt. Checking his watch he realized that it's already past 9pm.

 

Leaving the bathroom a few minutes later, now feeling awake, he walks through the kitchen and stops in front of the living room. He couldn't make out the second voice anymore and Himchan was talking non-stop. Seriously, that guy could talk anyone into unconsciousness.

 

"Nobody wants to know about your favorite recipe", he murmurs entering the living room, surprised to see Daehyun sit next to Himchan holding a cup of tea.

 

"Hey, good morning!", Himchan smiles. "I didn't want to wake you up, hope that was okay. Coffee, tea?”

 

"Yeah, okay... coffee", Yongguk says dropping down into his armchair, looking at Daehyun, who was holding his cup with both hands not looking at anyone. "Wow, you really know how to look uncomfortable."

 

The blonde boy looks up surprised before he smiles slightly.

 

"Sorry, I was just thinking... I had quite a hectic day yesterday and I barely slept tonight because my phone was ringing all the time."

 

Yongguk frowns and Himchan nods.

 

"He yelled some profanities at me when I called him in the morning, I thought my ears would fall off. You curse more often, Yongguk, but he's definitely got the dirtier words."

 

"Very funny", Yongguk brushes it off, looking at Daehyun. "What happened?"

 

"Oh, I just gained some popularity, I guess. Countless people called me asking for an autograph and at least 2 dozen wanted me to sign a contract with them. I swear, if this continues I won't become a singer but a professional killer."

 

They laugh.

 

"Oh right, why are you even here actually?", Yongguk asks then and the face of the younger one turns serious, making him look much more mature all of a sudden.

 

"That was actually a strange coincidence", he starts. "I was about to call him when he called me."

 

"And why did you want to call him?"

 

The boy shoves a hand into a pocket of his black skinny jeans, pulling out a white envelope and placing it on the table.

 

"That girl, Hyosung, she gave this to me yesterday before I left the school. I couldn't find you anymore, so I called a few people trying to find out your cellphone number, which wasn't easy, believe me. Anyways, that took me a while, plus I was disturbed a lot otherwise I would've contacted you earlier."

 

Yongguk nods, pointing at the envelope.

 

"And what did she write?"

 

"Well, I have no idea, actually. The letter is not for me. She told me to give it to you before Sunday. I asked her why she couldn't give it to you herself and she said that she wouldn't attend school for a few days because one of her friends wasn't feeling well and she wanted to take care of her."

 

"Jieun", Yongguk says quietly, feeling guilt wash up his throat and Daehyun sighs.

 

"I don't know what happened and I don't think we're close enough for such personal stuff and I really don't like being involuntarily used as a courier, but yeah", he leans forward to pick up the envelope, holding it out towards Yongguk. "Sunbaenim, I'm supposed to give this to you."

 

Taking the envelope Yongguk stares at it for a few seconds when all of a sudden Himchan gets up from the couch, tapping Daehyun's shoulder.

 

"You'll eat breakfast with us, come on, let's go and buy some food!"

 

Understanding quickly Daehyun follows him, grabbing his jacket on his way out of the apartment, leaving the oldest alone. He is thankful for having Himchan. He was an amazingly annoying retard, but also the best friend Yongguk could wish for. Slowly opening the envelope he pulls out a plain piece of paper with a neat, girly handwriting on it. Hyosung's handwriting.

 

Bang Yongguk.

I'm writing this letter and not calling you because I want you to remember what I'm going to tell you.

I don't know what happened exactly, but I want you to know that Jieun is blaming herself for something. She didn't tell me everything but it's obvious that something happened between the two of you and considering that she's crying I don't think it was something good.

I doubt that Jieun will leave the house this Saturday, but Sunday I will go to the park with her, to the café near the fountain. I know it's not the best weather for that but anyways. If you show up around 1pm I'll know that whatever happened wasn't your intention and that you want to make up for it. So you better not forget this, I'm counting on you.

 

PS: I chose Daehyun as the courier because he's quiet and trustworthy and won't open the letter, so be nice to him.

 

Hyosung.

 

Dropping the letter into his lap Yongguk feels devastated and cold all of a sudden. Jieun cried. She cried because of him, because of his stupidity. Growling angrily he walks into his own room again, changing into black jeans, a wifebeater and a red hoodie, stuffing the letter into his pocket. Back in the kitchen he grabs three breakfast plates, while his mind is elsewhere.

 

Hyosung gave him a chance. His last one, probably. No, definitely. He knows that the girl would defend her best friend, no matter what, even if she was friends with him. Well, he would definitely not mess up this time. He would fight.

 

When he hears a voice outside the door (Himchan's, because Daehyun doesn't talk much), he opens it, finding a surprised flatmate with his keys in one hand and a less surprised looking blonde carrying two bags. Yongguk rolls his eyes.

 

"What a hyung you are, seriously“, he says, reaching past his friend and taking the bags out of Daehyun's hands and carrying them into the apartment.

 

"Hey, he's younger, I'm allowed to do that!“, Himchan complains, following him into the apartment with Daehyun trailing behind saying nothing.

 

Daehyun prepares to leave around midday. While at their apartment his phone rang at least a dozen times, so when he grabs his jacket he grins sourly.

 

"I'll call you later to tell you my new cellphone number.“

 

After he's gone Yongguk tells Himchan about the content of the envelope.

 

"And? Are you going?“

 

"Of course“, Yongguk nods. "It's the last chance I have.“

 

 

---

 

 

 

Yongguk wakes up early the next day, getting dressed and waiting for Himchan to wake up before leaving the house. His best friend doesn't say anything, he simply understands. Walking through the streets of Seoul on this cold Sunday morning in October, he has some time to clear his mind. Unknowingly he finds himself in front of his school half an hour later. The school is open on weekends to so that any student who wanted to spend more time there, mostly for practice, could do so. This time Yongguk is lucky. The cold weather must've caused everyone else to stay at home so he had the large dance studio all for himself.

 

Three hours later it's 12am and he decides to leave again, even though he would be at the park almost 1 hour earlier. Upon arriving he finds the small café and enters, finding an empty table and sitting down. Barely half a minute later someone steps next to him, wearing black trousers and a white, buttoned shirt with a black tie.

 

"Welcome, may I take yo... Yongguk-sunbaenim?“

 

Yongguk looks up and right at Daehyun.

 

"Oh, hey... do you work here?“

 

"At the weekends and after school, yes. I'm paying for my younger sister's school fees. So, can I get you something?“

 

"I'll take... just a coffee, please. Black-“

 

"No sugar, no milk, I know“, the younger smiles, bowing slightly before rushing away again.

 

Three minutes later the blonde comes back, placing the coffee in front of Yongguk before looking at him.

 

"May I ask why you're here? Something about the envelope?“

 

Hesitating, Yongguk looks back at him.

 

"Do you have a few minutes?“

 

"Sure, I'll just take my break now“, the younger smiles, quickly informing one of the other waiters before sitting down across of Yongguk. "So?“

 

And Yongguk tells him everything, simply because the other really seems trustworthy. He gives off a warm vibe and he was a really good listener, so the older could simply talk without being interrupted. After he finishes talking Daehyun shifts into a slightly different sitting position, intertwining his fingers before looking at Yongguk.

 

"And what are you going to say when she shows up here?“

 

Staring at him Yongguk frowns, thinking. He didn't make a plan yet, he just came here and damnit, that blondie was right, what was he going to even say? Was he even ready to tell her exactly how he felt?

 

"Love is a strange thing, isn't it?“

 

Daehyun's sudden remark surprises Yongguk and he stares at the younger in confusion.

 

"What?“

 

"I'm 17 years old, hyung. Do you think I never fell in love?“

 

"No, of course not...“

 

"But I have to admit that I don't have good prospects of a happy ending, unlike you.“

 

"What do you mean?“, Yongguk questions, glad to have some distraction while waiting for Jieun.

 

"Well, it's kinda unfortunate to be in love with someone who's in a relationship already. Even worse when he's in a relationship with a girl.“

 

Yongguk raises his eyebrows in surprise.

 

"You're gay?“

 

"Does that bother you?“

 

"Absolutely not, I'm completely indifferent to other people's ual orientation.“

 

"I'm glad to hear that“, Daehyun smiles. "You know, when I told my grandma that the one I love loves someone else and would never fall in love with me, she said, people don't fall in love with what's right in front of them, they want what they can't have. The more unattainable, the more attractive.“

 

"So you think it won't work out with Jieun?“

 

"No!“, Daehyun laughs. "I think most people have to fall in love with the wrong people to realize that they have to let them go in order to find their true soulmate.“

 

"I probably shouldn't talk about previous girlfriends when she shows up, don't you think?“

 

"Well, that's true. I suppose you don't want to lie to her, so why don't you try telling her the truth?“

 

"The truth is kinda complicated.“

 

"Are you sure?“

 

Yongguk looks surprised and the younger one chuckles.

 

"Hey, you're not the only one to confess your love.“

 

"You confessed to him?“

 

"I wish“, Daehyun sighs sadly. "I was as close as you are to confessing, you know? But when the moment came I chickened out and said nothing. Two weeks later he wanted me to meet his girlfriend.“

 

"I'm sorry about that“, Yongguk says slowly, but the younger smiles.

 

"You don't have to be. He's still my best friend since kindergarten... and since I can remember seeing him happy is all I ever wanted. I didn't want to mess up his life and our friendship, but I still wonder what would've happened if I hadn't been such a coward. I know that you're in a similar situation and I simply don't want you to make the same mistake I made.“

 

"And what about letting go and finding your true soulmate?“

 

Daehyun smiles slightly, his eyes looking past Yongguk at a distant memory.

 

"You know, sometimes we fall in love with someone for all the wrong reasons, and we still love them, even after all the pain, simply because we can’t pick who we love. And even though we know we shouldn’t love them, we do and always will, because there are just a small number of people in this world who will touch us for reasons we can’t explain, even when they shouldn’t. Maybe I'm just afraid of not being there if he ever needs me.“

 

"Or maybe you're just hoping for another last chance?“

 

"Maybe“, Daehyun smiles.

 

"You know what, thank you. Himchan is my best friend“, Yongguk grins. "But you definitely give better advice.“

 

 

---

 

 

 

"S-sunbaenim?“

 

Yongguk jumps from his chair when he hears her voice, turning around to look at her. He could see how surprised she is to see him.

 

"Jieun“, Yongguk starts but she turns, attempting to leave, so he reaches out, grabbing her hand and stopping her. "Jieun, wait... please.“

 

He has a short flashback from their performance of "Going Crazy", but this time she's crying. Holding her hand Yongguk stares at her, unsure of what to do, his mind frantically trying to find a solution. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see Daehyun as he was cleaning an empty table. Deeply looking at Jieun again he inhales.

 

"Please, let me explain myself.“

 

"What's there to explain? I think you made everything clear enough already.“

 

"No! No... that was... a terrible misunderstanding.“

 

She looks surprised, carefully wiping her tears. He could see that she hesitates before grabbing a chair and sitting down.

 

"Okay“, she sniffles slightly. "Then explain.“

 

He sits down next to her, looking at his hands, trying to find the right words to start. Clearing his throat he turns his head to look at her.

 

"Friday... after the performances, when you kissed me and I shied away... I know what you thought, but believe me, you're wrong. I wasn't disgusted or uncomfortable or anything like that, I was just... surprised.“

 

"Surprised?“, Jieun echoes, looking at him with big eyes.

 

Yongguk swallows. Was this the moment to confess? He could hear laughter coming from a table a few steps away and he watches how Daehyun greets another guy by ruffling his hair. The other guy was holding hands with a pretty girl and suddenly Yongguk understands that this has to be the one the younger was talking about before. He notices how Daehyun's smile fades as soon as he turns around from the happy couple. Looking back at Jieun Yongguk inhales deeply.

 

"I was surprised because... well, how often does it happen that you get a surprise kiss from the one you love since the first moment you heard her voice in a crowded hallway?“

 

 

---

 

 

 

"Are they kissing? Are they kissing?“

 

"Wow, shut up, Himchan!“ Hyosung slaps the back of his head before pressing her hand over his mouth. "Unlike you they're decent people, I doubt that they'll make out in public all of a sudden, much less right after confessing.“

 

"Mhph mmhm hmph“, is all that's coming from Himchan and Hyosung chuckles, lowering her hand and allowing him to breathe and talk again.

 

"You know, despite the fact that you're a bit weird you're a cool guy. I like you.“

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

---

How should I continue to write?

A) Do you want me to write a fourth chapter exploring more of their relationship?

B) Do you also want me to write about the relationship between Himchan and Hyosung?

C) Do you want a spin-off (as a separate fanfic) explaining Daehyun's story? ()

So anyways, lots of love to everyone who read and supported this story, who left comments and suscribed! And also to all my silent readers because I know you're there! <3