A/N: Here's my fictional take on the infamous cold war. I used a wenrene coldwar video on youtube as a reference for this chapter. :) This is supposed to be just a one-shot but as I write, it became longer than I intended so I decided to divide it into 3 parts. Chapter 3 will be the final chapter but I'm still working on it and I have work in the upcoming days so it might take a week for me to post the last chapter. Thanks for reading!

**

August 2018 was coming to an end and since the girls have a 3-day off, they decided to have a pajama party. There were movies, lots of talks and laughters, and lots of soju. It was almost 2 in the morning when they decided to call it off after Seulgi fell asleep- more like passed out, in the sofa. The maknaes tipsily assisted Seulgi back to her shared room with Wendy before going to their room as well, while Irene and Wendy were the ones left in the living room to clean up their mess.

"Ugh, my stomach hurts from laughing too much." Irene commented as she wipes the table.

Wendy looks at the older and she can see the girl smiling. Wendy also noticed the flushed face and the slightly wobbly gait. She chuckled at the sight and went towards Irene.

"I'm gonna finish this up, unnie. You go ahead and rest." Wendy said as she took the rag from Irene's hold. She was feeling a bit tipsy but Wendy thought she had it better than the older girl.

"I think you're already drunk, unnie." Wendy said with a chuckle.

"I am not!" Irene swiftly snatch the rag from Wendy only to topple forward. Luckily, Wendy was able to hold her on time. Irene grins. "Okay, maybe a bit tipsy but totally not drunk."

"Okay, unnie, you're totally not drunk." Wendy teased, getting the rag from Irene once again. "But you go rest hm? Leave this to me."

"No. I'll help you, Seungwan-ah!" Irene attempted to snatch the rag once again from Wendy but the latter hid her hands on her back.

But of course, the competitive Irene will not back down. So she tried so hard to get the rag from Wendy but being under the influence of alcohol, Irene lost her balance and slip forward, falling over Wendy.

"Yah, Yah, un-" Wendy flailed her arms forward in attempt to prevent Irene from falling again but she was already too late, Irene was already falling, pushing her down in the process.

"Argh." Wendy fell on her back, with Irene on top of her.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, Seungwan. Are you okay?" Irene asked worriedly. She tried to get up immediately but due to the sudden movement, she felt dizzy and she lose her balance again, falling on Wendy once more but this time, also bumping her forehead with the younger's.

"Omo! I'm really sorry, Seungwan-ah." Irene didn't move this time, staying on top of Wendy as she brushes the latter's forehead. "Does it hurt?"

Wendy opens her eyes at Irene's touch and for a moment, she was unable to move. Irene is looking at her with worried eyes, the older girl's face literally just an inch away from her's.

Meanwhile, as Wendy opens her eyes, it's like the older girl was stunned. Irene realized their compromising position and how close her face is with Wendy and yet, she can't move. It's more of a, she refused to move. It's like Irene got lost in Wendy's eyes and the more she stares at the younger girl, the more her heart feels like it would combust anytime soon. She didn't know if it's the alcohol, or the fluttering feeling in her stomach, or the hammering of her chest, or of the suppressed feelings now wanted to be known. Irene didn't know what of these overcame her but she leaned in and captured Wendy's lips on her own.

The moment Wendy felt Irene's lips on hers, she have forgotten how to breath, and how to move. Wendy knows her feelings well, she knew it to herself that she loves Irene in a romantic way. She didnt know when specifically, but she recalls just staring at Irene and realizing she's now seeing the older girl in a different light. The first time Wendy realized that she's falling in love with Irene, she was in denial and she was scared. Irene is her leader and her member, she's a family. And Irene's a girl, she doesn't swing that way. So Wendy tried to fight those feelings away which was difficult considering how Irene would always clings to her and hugs her, how the older will always look after her and take care of her, even biasedly protecting her against anyone. But still, Wendy knew she have to keep those feelings to herself, she can't risk it.

But feeling Irene's lips on her own, Wendy threw the caution in the wind. She knows she might regret the aftermath but just this once, she wants to follow her heart. So she partened her lips and returned Irene's kiss with just as much fervor.

Irene felt Wendy returning her kiss and this encouraged her to do more. Soon, tongues were involved. Irene lifted herself up so that Wendy wouldn't carry her weight. Without breaking their kisses, Irene positioned herself on fours hovering over Wendy, the younger's body in between her legs. But just as Irene is moving, she accidentally hit a bottle that was scattered on the floor, which was broken to pieces. The sound of the glass breaking echoed in the living room, making the two stop.

Irene's eyes widened as she finally realized what they just did. She mentally cursed herself and immediately got off from Wendy.

"I'm- I'm sorry, Seungwan. I-I don't know what- what came over me. It's my fault. I- I don't know what I'm doing. I'm sorry." Irene rambled as she sat on the sofa, both hands on her face.

Wendy felt like she was slapped in the face by reality. She looks back at the obviously panicking Irene. "Was- was it a mistake, unnie?"

Irene frowned at the question. She lifted her head to look at Wendy. "What does that mean?"

"We- we both let it happen, we both... wanted it." Wendy gulped. "Didn't we?"

"I was drunk, Seungwan." Irene answered, avoiding Wendy's eyes.

"You said you weren't." Wendy answered in a small voice.

"I- I was, okay?" Irene stood and shakes her head. "This won't do. We can't be having this conversation right now. Lets-let's just talk when we're both sober."

"But un-"

Irene didn't give Wendy a chance to answer as she hurriedly left towards her room, leaving Wendy alone.

 

Much to Wendy's frustration, the talk didn't happen. It's been three days since the incident and Irene has been avoiding her like a plague. What saddens Wendy more is that Irene didn't only avoid her in the dorm. Even during their activities, Irene wouldn't even look at her in the eyes. She would often stay beside Irene but the leader wouldn't even acknowledged her. This didn't go unnoticed by the other members. But they thought it was just a simple misunderstanding that the two will soon resolve.

When a week had passed and the two were still not talking to each other, the three members decided to take matters in their hands. It was their concert in Bangkok so they have to stay at a hotel. Seulgi, Joy and Yeri volunteered to room-in together so that left Irene and Wendy to share the other room. Wendy knows she wouldn't be able to focus on their activities if Irene will continue to ignore her despite staying in the same room, so she thought of bargaining to Seulgi. However, during their concert, Irene surprisingly walked up to her and talked to her like everything's okay.

So when they were back at their shared room after the concert, Wendy thought that maybe, they can finally talk. Much to Wendy's surprise, Irene beated her up to it.

"Seungwan-ah." Irene called out. "Let's talk?"

Wendy heaved a sigh of relief. Finally, Irene decided to stop ignoring her. But at the same time, Wendy can't help but feel nervous. Nonetheless, Wendy nodded and she sat down at the bed across Irene.

"I'm sorry, Seungwan-ah. For avoiding you, for avoiding this talk. I.. It's just that I wasn't ready before. I needed to think about what happened and what went wrong. But I know it's my fault, Seungwan. I shouldn't have done it. It's my mistake. I'm sorry."

Wendy frowns."Was it.. Was it really just a mistake, unnie?"

"We're both drunk, Seungwan." Irene answered, emphasising the word 'drunk'. Somehow, she can't help but avoid Wendy's stare.

"I was not, unnie." Wendy admitted. "Maybe a bit tipsy, but totally not drunk."

Irene frowns at Wendy's words. Those were her own exact words to Wendy before the kiss happened. Irene knew what Wendy's intention is. The younger girl wants to remind her of what she said. Wendy wants to know what's real and what's not.

"Those who claim that they are not drunk are the ones who are actually drunk."

Wendy sighs. If Irene claims that she's really drunk that day, then maybe she just have to accept it and accept the fact that for Irene, what happened was really just a drunken mistake. Wendy knew she should have stopped at that. But she can't. And before she can even stop herself, she answered Irene.

"And I'm telling you that I'm NOT drunk, unnie."

Irene stared at Wendy with confusion in her eyes.

"I was not drunk, unnie." Wendy repeated. "I knew what I was doing. I knew what I did. I returned your kisses not because I was drunk, unnie."

Irene stood, albeit panickly. Somehow she felt like she knows what Wendy is going to say but she can't let it, she must not. "Seungwan, no, st-"

"I love you, unnie."

Wendy thought she's crazy for saying it to Irene. For years, she tried to buried those feelings away so not to ruin anything. She has no plans of letting her feelings known, but after that kiss, she had hopes that maybe, just maybe, the feeling is mutual. But now that the older girl is denying everything and saying it was just a mistake, Wendy thought that maybe she just have to come clean with her feelings and who knows, Irene might do the same.

"I'm in love with you."

"No-no, Seungwan-ah." Irene can feel her tears coming. She shakes her head. "You're just mistaken, Seungwan. You-you can't.."

"Why, unnie?" Wendy can't stop her tears as well. "Why not when I felt from your kiss that you also feel the same?"

"Seungwan," Irene rushed towards Wendy and wipes the latter's tears. "Let's, let's not do this to ourselves, hm?"

Wendy just lowered her head and Irene sighs. "We-this- this is wrong, Seungwan. We just can't. We're idols, and we're both girls. Korea would not accept us. It wouldn't work. Let's not go there, okay?"

"Seungwan-ah," Irene lifted Wendy's jaw and look at the latter's eyes. "Let's just forget everything that happened. It- it was just a mistake." Irene flinched at her own words. "I'm sorry."

Feeling defeated, Wendy nodded weakly.

"Okay, unnie." Wendy can hear her voice cracking. "I'll, I'll just go outside."

Wendy immediately made a move to leave but Irene grabs her arm, stopping her from leaving.

"Please talk to me, Seungwan-ah."

"...."

"Seungwan.."

"What do you still want me to say, unnie?"

Irene gulped. She can hear anger in Wendy's voice.

"Seungwan, please. This is also hard for me."

"Because you're a coward, unnie." There, Wendy finally said it. She knows it's wrong and that Irene didn't deserve that. She can't even believe that she just said that to the girl she respects so much. The moment she said it, Wendy wanted to take it back. But her heart hurts so much right now that she just can't make a move or say anything to appease the older girl.

"What?" Irene didn't like the accusation. She felt offended. But deep inside her, she knows there are truths to that word, maybe that's why she didn't take it nicely. "I'm just being realistic here, Seungwan!"

Wendy flinched as Irene's voice rises. She knew she hit a nerve, but Wendy is feeling too emotional to back down.

"You're not facing the reality, unnie. You're hiding from it."

"And what do you want me to do? This is not just about the two of us, Seungwan. Have you ever thought of our members? Of the scrutiny that we would face?"

"I'm not asking you to shout it to the whole world, unnie! I'm just asking you to be true to your feelings."

"And I already told you that it was just a mistake!"

"Is that.. How you really feel, unnie?"

Irene looked away. "Yes."

Wendy wiped the tears that fall down her face. She sighed defeatedly. Wendy can't even say a word because she knows her voice will gave in, so Wendy just gestured a nod of understanding before she hurriedly went out of the room.

Irene collapsed at the bed after Wendy left. She burried her face in her hands and let her tears fall.

 

Irene and Wendy were back on the no-speaking zone after that, the only difference is that this time, it was Wendy who is blatantly avoiding Irene. That surprised their other three members and they came up with the conclusion that the two had a big fight because Wendy has always been the patient one, so for her to avoid Irene like that, they wonder how intense their fight was and more importantly, why?

It is true that Wendy is avoiding their leader. She was angry that night but her anger was long gone. She can't stay mad at someone for too long, let alone to Irene. But Wendy just can't seem to face Irene after that confrontation, she just doesn't know how to feel or how to react. Wendy didn't know if she should be disappointed because she felt that Irene was being a coward that night for not admitting her feelings when Wendy can feel that Irene felt the same for her; or if she should be embarrassed of herself for even thinking, and insinuating, that Irene feels the same when the older girl made it clear that she doesn't. Like, if Irene already said it herself that it was just a mistake, why would Wendy thinks otherwise? But more importantly, Wendy was hurt. It's not only because Irene indirectly rejected her, it's because she felt like Irene raises her up only for the older girl to dropped her to the ground. Irene awakens her hidden feelings, the feelings that Wendy was doing so great at ignoring, only for Irene to throws it away.

Irene, on the other hand, is at lost. She wanted to approach Wendy and talk to the latter but what would she say? Should she apologize? But for what? For rejecting her? Or, like Wendy had said, for being a coward?

It was so awkward for the other three girls, especially during concerts and events. They were often side by side but it was like there was this huge wall between them. There was even this one event were the tension between the two was so intense that they looked like two teenage couple in a fight.

So one night, when Yeri went out of her room and incidentally saw Irene sitting mindlessly at the dining area, she decided to approach their leader.

"Unnie?"

"Oh, Yerim-ah." Irene was startled. Clearly, her mind was on something else. Yeri thought.

"It's past midnight unnie. Why are you still here?"

"Oh I uh, I just can't sleep. You?"

"I was going to the bathroom when I saw you here, unnie."

"Oh," Irene nodded. "Go on then."

To Irene's surprise, Yeri sat beside her.

"You're waiting for Wendy unnie?"

"What?" Irene chuckled awkwardly. "No, no I'm not."

'But of course, when it comes to Wendy unnie, you're very easy to read, unnie.' Yeri somehow smiled at the thought.

"She's not coming home tonight, unnie."

"What?!" Irene was not able to hide her surprise. She cleared . "Why?"

"She's at Taeyeon unnie' s. She has an upcoming album and I think she wanted Wendy unnie's help about something."

"At this hour??"

"Well unnie, you know how Wendy unnie went out with her American friends tonight, right? Tiffany unnie was there too, so I think Taeyeon unnie tagged along."

Irene sighs. She can't believe that she didn't even know where Wendy went. This didn't go unnoticed by the youngest member, so she decided to just go straight to the point.

"Unnie, I may not know what's happening between you and Wendy unnie, but I can see that it's affecting you both. Real hard."

Irene stayed silent and lowered her head. Of course, it's obvious that their members will realize that they are fighting.

"I won't ask you to tell me what happened, unnie. It's between you both. But instead, I would ask you to please, sort it out with Wendy unnie? I don't like seeing you two this way."

"I'm.. sorry, Yerim-ah."

"You don't have to apologize, unnie." Yeri made it clear. "I just want you two to be okay again."

"I.. I want it too." Irene answered in a small voice but still loud enough for Yeri to hear.

"Then talk it out to her, unnie?" Yeri encouraged. "I mean, considering that it's been over a week and you two are still like this, I think it was not just a simple misunderstanding and it might not be something that is easy to talk about." Yeri sighs. "But we can see that you're both a mess right now, unnie. Sooyoung unnie even said that Wendy unnie keeps saying weird things."

This caught Irene's attention. "What things?"

"Sooyoung unnie won't tell." Yeri shrugged. "So, please just talk it out, unnie?"

"I.. I'll try, Yerim-ah."

Yeri smiled. "That's good enough, unnie."

 

Joy was at the living room, watching TV, when Irene got back to the dorm one night.

"Oh unnie, you're here. Have you had dinner?"

"Hm." Irene nodded. "You?"

"I just finished, unnie."

"How about the others?" Irene looks across the other rooms.

"Yeri's out with Saeron, I think. Wendy unnie and Seulgi unnie have a schedule."

Irene nodded at the information. She recalled what Yeri told her the other day and thought that it's the perfect moment to talk with Joy. If her guess is right, Joy already knew what happened between her and Wendy. Wendy is like, Joy's favorite unnie after all.

"Sooyoung?" Irene called out, sitting on one of the sofa.

Joy looked at Irene and saw that the older girl seemed bothered by something. So, she turned off the TV and faced Irene.

"Yes unnie? Is there something wrong?"

"Well," Irene hesitated. "Yerim told me that Seungwan told you, uh, things? Weird things?"

"Oh." Honestly, Joy already knows what's going on. She had confronted Wendy about it before and she hoped to be able to talk with Irene as well, she just didn't expect that Irene will take the initiative. "Yes, unnie. I had a talk with Wendy unnie a week ago. And I kinda forced it out from her." Joy admitted. "I'm sorry, unnie. I'm just worried about the two of you."

Irene nodded understandingly. She was right. "So, you already know what happened that night?" Irene asked carefully. Somehow, she's scared to know how Joy took the news, especially about the kiss.

Joy nodded. "Everything, unnie. The night of your fight, and the night that caused that."

Irene internally flinched. So Joy knows that she kissed Wendy. Irene dared to read Joy's eyes and much to her surprise, the younger was not looking at her differently.

"Wendy unnie also told me that she confessed to you."

Aa expected of Joy, as straightforward as ever. However, Irene was confused. Joy didn't seem like she was surprised at all.

"To be honest, unnie, I was not surprised anymore." Joy said, answering Irene's thought. "I mean, I think it's already pretty obvious with the way Wendy unnie looks at you. But of course, I can't say for sure not unless unnie admitted it, which, she just did."

'So Seungwan.. Really does love.. me? And yet I.. I rejected her.' Irene felt guilty at that thought. She clenched her fists that were resting on her knees.

Joy observed Irene and instantly knew what the older girl is thinking. She sighed.

"But you know what, unnie?" Joy continued. "It's not what I find weird though."

Irene raised her brow. Is Joy telling her that she doesn't find it weird that Wendy just confessed to her about her romantic feelings for Irene? What could be more weird than that?

"Wendy unnie said that maybe, you really don't like her that way." Joy said, surprising Irene. "That's what I find weird, unnie. Honestly."

"Sooyoung, what- just what are you talking about?"

"You know me, unnie. So I'll be direct here, okay?" Joy sighed once more. "Don't you really feel the same way for Wendy unnie?" Joy frowned and whispered her next words. "Cause I can vouch that you do. You may not know it but you're way more obvious than Wendy unnie."

"Or, maybe you just don't realize your feelings yet?"

"Or.. you do.. but you're just scared to admit it?"

Irene's eyes wavered at the last sentence and Joy knew she had her answer.

"Unnie, you know it's o-"

"Sooyoung," Irene interrupted. "You're talking about Seungwan and I like it's a normal thing, so let's just be reminded here that it's not. We're both-"

"You're both girls, unnie. Yes, I know."

"And what?" Irene was confused. Joy is unexpectedly taking the issue lightly. "And it's okay for you?"

"Yes." Joy answered in a bit, eyes never faltering.

Irene raised her hands to wipe her face in frustration. "You don't understand, Sooyoung. We just can't."

"Yeah, maybe you're right, unnie. I don't understand. So, kindly enlighten me, why you can't?"

"What? Sooyoung, you just said it, we're both girls! Let alone, an idol. Korea would not accept us, the society wouldn't!"

"Why would you even need the society to accept you, unnie?" Joy argued, not backing down. "I didn't know it's a requirement before loving someone."

For a moment, Irene didn't know what to answer. She sighed. "It's not that simple, Sooyoung-ah. The members, our families-"

"Will understand, unnie." Joy continued, interrupting Irene. "I'm not saying they would understand right away but, family is family. You know that, unnie. And as for our members," Joy faked a disappointed sigh. "I don't know if I should be offended that you thought we can't, and we won't accept you, unnie."

"Sooyoung.." Irene didn't really know what to say. Her mind was a mess but Joy had an answer for everything- a wise answer that is. "Why do you make it sound like this is just a simple thing?"

Irene asked but confusion is not evident on her face anymore. It was like she already laid down her guard.

"Because I love you both, unnie." Joy smiled kindly to her unnie. "And I want you two to be happy. That's the most important thing above anything else." She held Irene's hand, squeezing it. "And I hope you give yourself that happiness too, unnie."

For the first time since their talk, Irene managed to smile. Joy smiled seeing this and she wiped Irene's tears that the older girl didn't even realized she had. "It's okay, unnie. If it's too much for you, just take your time. But please be honest with Wendy unnie?"

Irene smiled, wiped her own tears, and nodded.

 

Irene knows that Joy haven't told Wendy about their talk. It's obvious with how the younger girl is still avoiding her. Irene preferred it though that she should be the one to tell Wendy what she really feels. Though her talk with Joy was an eyeopener, it is still all too much for her. So taking Joy's advice, Irene is taking her time to embrace all these feelings that she have inside.

However, Irene noticed that the more she takes her time, the more it felt like Wendy is slowly drifting apart from her. She first realized this during their one Oksusu live wherein they were to watch and comment about their level up project in Slovenia. Irene and Wendy were seated side by side as per their sitting arrangement that day. Irene was somehow glad. She felt that was an opportunity to have a conversation with Wendy where the younger girl won't be able to ignore her.

But damn. Irene thought. The vlive was a mess. Although Wendy would acknowledged her and talked to her, the younger girl wouldn't even look at Irene in the eyes. Wendy would look at Irene when the leader is talking but when Irene will look back at her, Wendy will look elsewhere, avoiding her eyes. This frustrates Irene. It didn't help that Joy seemed to be mocking her by blatantly flirting and laughing with Wendy.

But what scared and bothered Irene the most was during their event at this one university festival. They were set to perform multiple songs, including Bad Boy and Red flavor. Irene was so sure that she will finally get to meet Wendy's eyes. They always had this cute interaction during a part of the said songs. However, when they sang Bad boy and this particular Joy-Seulgi's part came, Irene expected that Wendy will smile at her just like what she usually does, but to Irene's surprise, Wendy turned her head to side, avoiding Irene's gaze.

Irene had one last hope- their red flavor interaction. As Irene's most awaited part came, her back at the audience, Wendy sang her part- Irene waited. Wendy would always look and smile to her direction during this part. So, Irene waited. But Wendy didn't look her way. The younger didn't even glance at her direction. Unable to control it, Irene heaved a heavy breath. And that's when she felt it.

'I'm losing Seungwan.'

 

Irene was beyond scared after that day. She felt like she's loosing Wendy and she can't, she won't let it happen. So she finally decided to confront Wendy. Unfortunately, the next few days deemed impossible to talk with the latter as they were all busy with their schedules that they would be given just 2-3 hours a day to rest.

And talk about bad luck, Irene even got sick. The moment they went back to the dorm after their schedule, Irene went straight to the living room after washing up to wait for Wendy who had another event to finish. Irene's head is aching and she can feel herself burning up but this is the only time she has to talk with Wendy. After this day, they would all be busy again and Irene was afraid that she'll not find another chance to speak with Wendy again. Irene can almost feel that her time is tickling and that if she won't do anything, she'll lost Wendy. So, despite her members' disapproval of her staying in the living room instead of resting at her room, Irene stood her ground.

Irene flinched when she felt something cold on her forehead.

"Oh, I'm sorry, unnie." a voice whispered, a very familiar voice.

"S-seungwan?" Irene called weakly as she opens her eyes and an awkwardly smiling Wendy greeted her.

"Why are you here, unnie?" Wendy asked softly, damping the wet cloth on Irene's forehead. "You're sick. You should be resting in your room. It's cold to sleep here in the living room, you know?"

Irene's eyebrows furrowed. She didn't realize she have fallen asleep.

"Let's get you to your room, okay unnie? You should rest."

Upon hearing Wendy's voice once more, that's when Irene hit her that Wendy is talking to her. Wendy is finally talking to her! Irene's eyes widened. That reminds her that she has to talk to Wendy.

"Wait, Seungwan-ah. Let's talk."

"But unnie, you're sick. You should rest first."

"No. No, Seungwan. This is important. It- it can't wait."

Wendy raised her eyebrow. "Nothing is more important than your health, unnie."

"You." Irene whispered.

"Nae?" Wendy thought she heard Irene wrong.

"I- I can't lose you, Seungwan-ah."

Wendy was taken aback for a moment. She then smiled and shakes her head. "You won't lose me, unnie. I promise. So please, don't make me worry more than I already am and take a rest first, unnie?"

"B-but.."

"I promise we'll talk once you're feeling well, unnie. Promise."

Knowing that Wendy always stay true to her words, Irene gave in and let Wendy accompany her to her room where Irene immediately drifted off to sleep.

 

When Irene woke up the next morning, she was surprised that it's already past 9 in the morning. The first thing that came to her mind was that Wendy promised her that they will talk. So, she immediately went out of the room to look for the younger girl. She found Wendy at the kitchen, cooking some food. Seeing this, Irene heaved a sigh of relief.

Wendy realized Irene's presence and she smiled at the older girl. "Oh, you're right on time for breakfast, unnie. How are you feeling?"

"I'm good, Seungwan-ah." Irene returned the smile. She missed having these simple moments with Wendy.

"Okay. Now take a seat, unnie, and we'll eat."

Irene realized that the dorm seemed quiet. "Where's the others though?"

"Oh, they proceeded with our schedule, unnie. They left at dawn."

And that's only when Irene realized that they supposedly have a schedule today.

"And.. us?" Irene asked.

"Well, you still have fever earlier, unnie, so manager Oppa agreed to pull you out from today's schedule."

"And.. you?"

Wendy chuckled. "I was pulled out too, unnie. To take care of you, of course."

Irene's heart swells hearing what Wendy said.

"So, unnie." Wendy cleared . "Do you want us to talk now or let's have breakfast first?"

"Let's talk now, Seungwan.

Wendy nodded. "Uh, do you want to go first, unnie?"

"Yes." Irene answered immediately. She must talk now while she still have the courage.

"Okay, unnie. Go ahead then. I'll listen."

Irene gulped. Suddenly, she doesn't know what to say, or where to start. She clenched her fist that was on the table.

Seeing this, Wendy brushed her thumb on Irene's closed fist. "It's okay, unnie." She assured the older girl.

"I.." Irene swallowed the lump on and decided to be honest. For Wendy. "I love you, Seungwan-ah. And I, I don't mean it in a platonic way."

Wendy was surprised. Her heart felt like it would burst. But she knew that it doesn't end there, there are still many words to be said. So instead, Wendy just smiled calmly.

Irene can feel the butterflies in her stomach seeing how Wendy lit up with her confession. But she also felt scared. She have to be honest with Wendy and she was hoping the younger girl wouldn't be hurt by it.

Irene hesitated for a moment. So, Wendy decided to help the older girl.

"So, you love me, unnie.." Wendy smiled understandingly. "But?"

Irene was surprised. For a moment she have forgotten that it's Wendy she is talking to, the girl who knows her so well.

Irene gulped. "But.. I don't think.. I'm ready to take this to the next level." Irene panicked and held Wendy's hand. "Seungwan, please don't get me wrong. I love you, Seungwan. I really do. And I want to continue loving you. It's just that.. This is all new to me. And I can't help but feel scared.. I'm sorry, Seungwan-ah. You're right, I'm a coward."

"You're not being a coward right now, unnie." To Irene's surprise, and relief, Wendy is still smiling at her. "I'm seeing the brave and strong Joohyun unnie that I know."

"You're.. You're not angry?" Irene asked carefully.

Wendy chuckled. She shakes her head. "Thank you for telling me your honest feelings, unnie. And uh," Wendy scratched the back of her head. "I'm sorry too, unnie. For ignoring and avoiding you. I guess I was just hurt. But-" Wendy continued immediately, seeing that Irene felt guilty and lowered her head. "But I guess I was just hurt because I'm not seeing things from your point of view. And it's not your fault, unnie. So you don't have to be sorry."

"Seungwan, I'm not rejecting you, okay?"

"I know, unnie." Wendy smiled. "I understand now where you're coming from and I will respect your decision. You're more important than anything else, unnie. And I don't want to lose you too."

"I can't lose you too, Seungwan-ah." Irene tightened her hold on Wendy's hand.

"You won't, unnie. I promised."

 

After that day, the L word was never brought up again. Nonetheless, Irene and Wendy became closer than ever, if that's even possible. It's like, even without words, they already knew what the other is feeling for the other. They didn't need words for them to show what they really feel. The feeling is there, and only the two of them can understand it.

 

 

"So, Yeri and I were right all along. We knew you both have feelings for each other!" Seulgi exclaimed as Irene finished recalling what happened before. "And urgh, I can't believe Sooyoung made us believe that she didn't know anything. That girl, she's really an actress."

Irene was quite surprised to hear the excitement in Seulgi's voice. "Seul, does this mean.. you're okay with it?"

"With you and Seungwan being in love with each other?" Seulgi asked with a hint of disbelief. "Unnie, I'm surprised that you two aren't dating yet. I mean, I would believe it more if you tell me that you two are secretly married already!"

"Yah," Irene hits the laughing girl's arm playfully. "I'm serious."

"And I'm serious too, unnie. Have you seen the way you two act around each other? Or how you stare at one another? Oh, sugars!" Seulgi faked a shudder.

Irene shakes her head at the teasing.

"But seriously though, unnie." Seulgi started, making Irene nervous. "Did you honestly think that it may not be okay for me or for us? Ugh, I'm even offended to think that you thought we can't accept you or Seungwan, unnie."

Irene smiles and shakes her head hearing Seulgi's words. It's like the same words Joy said to her almost two years ago.

"Thank you, Seulgi-ah."

Sooyoung is right. Irene thought. They will understand.