Jinki unlocked the door softly, not wanting to wake the other occupant in the house. Shuffling his tired body through the door, he kicked off his shoes and raised his head to check the time from the wall hung clock in the living room.

3 am.

Fumbling around in the dark, he switched on lights to the kitchen and got himself a glass of water before poking his head out of the corridor leading to the master bedroom. “Seems like I did not wake him up this time” Jinki humoured himself.

It has been 2 days since he came home, tied up in the hospital with what was going around globally. After a 36-hour shift to handle the influx of patients, the hospital had forced him to get a rest day before he turns into one of their patients. Jinki went home reluctantly. They were at the peak of a pandemic and every medical personnel and resource is precious. Yet, Jinki knows he needs to rest so that he could be well and clear-minded enough for his patients.

He quickly took off his clothes and threw them into a pail his boyfriend has labelled ‘biohazard’. Jinki had laughed at it previously when Jong Hyun complained about the germs he brings back from the hospital. They had ‘argued’ about how he showered himself and how the germs he supposedly brought back from the hospital is no different from the germ his boyfriend bought back from a day of work running around the city. Jinki stared as his clothes gradually soaked into the disinfecting liquid thinking now that it seems like a good thing to do. 

Washing up his glass, Jinki switched off the lights and felt his way to the master bedroom. He tried to turn the doorknob slowly refusing to wake the other guy up. What welcomed him was total darkness. The curtains in the room were drawn up such that no lights from the streets or the moon could enter. His little boyfriend was light sensitive and many times, Jinki had woke the other up with just the corridor lights. After numerous late-night walks into furniture and walls, waking not only his boyfriend by probably also his neighbours, Jinki could now navigate his way around their apartment blind.

Slowly making his way across the room, Jinki turned to look at the sleeping figure on the bed. Still sound asleep he thought in relief. Feeling his way through the darkness to the clothes cabinet, Jinki grabbed any top and bottom and headed toward the shower.

Jinki turned the water as hot as he could take to soothe all the tension he had built up at the hospital. It was a battle the moment he stepped in and don his personal protection equipment. Everyone felt like soldiers at war.  Geared up from head to toe, the mask so tight the elastic leaves marks on his face. The suit itself was a heated sauna, everyone tried to have a delicate balance of water intake to make sure they are hydrated yet not too much for frequent toilet breaks. Going for bathroom breaks is another hassle by itself. Simply getting out of their shell of protection took as long as 15 minutes and upon returning, they had to disinfect all over again and spend another 15 minutes of a struggle getting everything back up. Meals were gobbled down within 15 minutes before everyone went back to work. It was like this for months and months and things only seem to be getting worse. Hospital beds were flooded, there were at least hundred over suspected cases at the emergency department every day, so many tests and checks they had to go through to filter out those who really needed the medical care. He had too many patients to check and attend to in one shift that every face was a blur, there was barely time to breathe, barely time to sit down with the patients and talk to them about how they were doing. It was sad that they could not even have family visits. Only the too busy and tired doctors and nurses as their string of social interaction.

The hospital had provided them with accommodation to reduce travelling time and rest, many people took it, fearful to bring the virus back home. Jinki had given thoughts about it, he just could not bear to bring the virus home. Yet when he talked to Jong Hyun about it, the man went into an angry fit, screaming about him being selfish and not thinking about him all alone at home. The anger turned quickly into a bout of tears when Jinki took his worried boyfriend into his arms telling him that he was sorry. He had not thought about how much Jong Hyun would worry about him being in such a dangerous situation. He had revealed that if Jinki died, he wouldn’t have lived either. So, nope. Heroes have their problems too. And he is no hero.

The water hitting on his back turned cold as Jinki dazed out in his tired body. Jinki shuddered, snapping back to the present and quickly turn the icy shower off. Drying himself, he had to laugh at what he picked from his clothes pile. A yellow tee shirt and a bright red pair of boxers. He moved on with his nightly routine and by the time Jinki slipped into bed, it was 4.30 in the morning.

The dip and slight movement of the bed must have woke his boyfriend up. Jinki was laying on his sides, checking his phone for any urgent messages before turning in when he felt a hand wrap around his neck and a body warmth against his back, a chin resting on his neck.  

“Sorry, Jjong. Did I wake you up?” Jinki took one last look at his phone and place it on the nightstand, trying to turn around in bed.

Jonghyun released him giving Jinki some room to turn to face his sleepy boyfriend. Jonghyun’s eyes were closed as he snuggles towards Jinki. Automatically, Jinki’s large arms wrapped around his little boyfriend, hands resting at the small of his back and shoulder, enjoying the warmth the body was emitting. He planted a kiss on the sleepy lips of his boyfriend.

his dried lips and swallowing twice to find his voice back, Jonghyun croaked, “I woke the moment you sneak into the bathroom. Took you long enough that I fell back to sleep.” He had his legs across Jinki’s body and hands wrapping around his torso, pulling them both into a tight hug.

“I dazed out and the shower turned cold. Otherwise, you might find me there in the morning.” Jinki laughed. He rested his chin above Jonghyun’s head while the other chose to lay his head against his chest.

“Suffering from hypothermia,” Jonghyun commented receiving a light pat on his for teasing his boyfriend. “What time is it now” he continued, voice getting clearer now that he is more awake.

With Jonghyun in his embrace, Jinki wanted to fall asleep. His small shoulders and figure are so cuddly and his warmth is so precious and he smells like home and everything Jinki would work for. He always missed it when he had to stay in the hospital for shifts. “Hmm…. 4.30”

“That’s later than usual” Jonghyun took Jinki’s hands from his shoulders and started massaging it from fingers to his arm.

“It was an influx of cases today.” Jinki sighed at how skilful Jonghyun’s hands were. “Had to complete the list before signing out. Otherwise, the cases are going to pile up. Now now, go back to sleep young man. You got to get to work in a few hours”

“I am working from home now” Jonghyun retorted. “I missed you.” He continued, once again curling and snuggling into Jinki’s broad chest. “It was lonely last night...”

“You know I sleep at the hospital when I have consecutive shifts” Jinki replied, the silky bed hair, not daring to confess to his boyfriend that he did not have a wink in the last 36 hours.

“I know. But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss you. And your life is in danger everyday… why can’t you quit… ” Jonghyun trailed off.

“Jjong” Jinki scolded before softening and hug his boyfriend again “I miss you too. Sleep”

“Sorry Jinki.” Jonghyun pouted as Jinki shifted to place them both in a better position.

Jinki drew the blanket up to cover them both. Before falling into his deep slumber, Jinki heard Jonghyun said, “You did a good job today, you worked so hard, you are my prize. I am proud of you.”

“Me too” Jinki whispered, landing a soft peck on Jonghyun’s forehead before he too, shut down.