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With vaulted ceilings, arched windows that were fitted to the entire height of the wall, and pristine white walls, Wendy’s house was a dream on the Upper East Side. A multimillion dollar townhouse, wowing every guest via its gothic-esque architecture yet modern design.

The house was a masterpiece, yet none of that mattered to Wendy beyond the comfort of getting to come home to such luxury. There were too many rooms, too much emptiness that allowed Wendy’s thoughts to fill up the large spaces. It was a house with the two people she loved dearly, owned by a businesswoman who only felt love when she held her daughter or talked to her sister.

There were some days, though, where life flowed through her like she was 21 again and falling in love, with energy coursing through her like she had come back from the dead. Days where she had a reason to not go to work, including days that weren’t even directly about her but instead her loved ones, such as Son Joohyun’s 10th birthday.

The three of them sat in the dining room, eating a grand breakfast prepared by Yeri herself. As she chewed her food, Wendy eyed the letter that was safely placed beside her daughter’s plate, noticing how thick the envelope seemed compared to past years. Parts of her wished she could read what she considered to be the last remaining parts of Joy, but she respected her too much. Reading them would enlighten her but at the cost of honesty and a promise made.

“So,” Yeri started. “How’s your birthday so far?”

It was only a little past 10 in the morning, yet Joohyun’s day already felt busy. She had a mission, a purpose. With a glint in her eyes that screamed mischief, the 10 year old smiled widely at her aunt.

And with an almost identical glint, Yeri winked back, knowing exactly what was written on the pages so dear to the young child. Years ago, Yeri had promised to never let Wendy read the letters, but she made no such promise herself. She was fully prepared to help Joohyun find Bae Joohyun.

“My day just started!” Joohyun teased. A brightness seemed to always surround the child; even on days where she’d cry because she missed her mother because she was always working, that brightness never left.

Yes, her day had just started, but it already felt so fulfilled. As her mother closed her eyes to savor the breakfast in , Joohyun took a peek at the picture of a young Bae Joohyun enclosed in the letter; a picture clearly taken on a disposable camera as bright eyes and a youthful smile stayed on the face of a girl wearing a bright green shirt with a white headband holding her short hair back.

The rest of Joohyun’s birthday was uneventful compared to what opened her day. Grand presents and the hype surrounding the marking of her first decade on earth were simply precursors to tomorrow’s events: her mother’s death anniversary. Every year, the three made their way to Astoria, New York, visiting the house of Joy’s father, all with the intent of celebrating the life of Park Sooyoung.

While Wendy spent the day with her daughter, Yeri called Joy’s father, arranging the details for tomorrow and the rest of the week. They always spent a few days with each other, knowing that Sooyoung’s death was especially hard on her father and wife, so the extra time together allowed for mutual healing.

“Does 4:00 PM still work for you?”

“Yes, of course.” The graying headmaster paused, pondering his next words. “How is Wendy doing?”

A quiet sigh left Yeri’s lips as she thought about her older sister. Days where she’d tease Wendy endlessly about her best friend, which moved on into endless teasing about her new girlfriend, then endless teasing about her fiancé, and finally endless teasing about her wife. Now, there was no teasing, only a sad weight that seemed to appear every time she looked at Wendy. Maybe it was pity, or maybe it was love, but Yeri knew her sister, and she knew that even if she had moved on, she had not allowed herself to live again.

“Wendy is…” she searched for the right words. “Hanging in there.”

“I see.” Dr. Park was also hanging in there, with the death of his daughter and wife leaving him alone, but he had learned to live again, and he hoped one day Wendy could too.

Hours later, when everything had settled down in the house, Joohyun sat on her queen sized bed, watching her TV with barely contained excitement as a new episode of her favorite show aired.

“Hey, guys!” A perky woman with wide eyes and long, brown hair held a microphone as she stood on a beach, surrounded by half people waiting like hungry sharks to get on camera. “This is Park Jihyo, and you’re watching your favorite show: The Jihyo Show!”

The host stood still as the camera zoomed into her face, a splitting smile still plastered on her face. “Like always, we’re going to be trying something new!” Jihyo turned to the crowd behind her. “Do you guys want to play a game?”

When she was answered with cheers, she laughed and started to approach the crowd as she continued to talk to the cameras. “It’s said that this game helps bring out the truth of the heart. I’ll say a word, and you have to say the first word that comes to mind—but you have no time to think!”

With a microphone being shoved into the face of a young man, she chose him as the first contestant.

“We’ll start with you. Clouds?”

And when the young man couldn’t think of a word, she swiftly moved on to the next. “Sorry, time’s up.” 

“Clouds?”

“Rain.”

Satisfied, she moved on once again.

“Beautiful?”

“Jihyo!”

She laughed and pushed his shoulder. “Thanks!”

“Heart?” She asked a tall man wearing sunglasses.

“Love.”

Something about his answer made Jihyo stay for more, fishing for something juicier. “Okay… love?”

“Seohyun!”

A shocked girl looked at him as he answered. “You love me?”

He nodded and took her into his arms, while Jihyo turned back to the camera with mirth.

“See! This game really works. You saw how feelings came rushing out. Now you try this game, and we’ll be right back after a break!”

Instantly, Joohyun got up, ready to try the game on her mother, a plan already formulated. While going down the stairs, she ran into the person she wanted to see, and she relayed the rules of her game.

Wendy listened patiently, forcing herself to consider the idea of the game. Unfortunately, she could not justify playing it. “Stupid game, stupid Jihyo.”

She turned around and walked down the stairs, waiting at the bottom for Joohyun. As she waited, she mentally noted to research this Park Jihyo and see if it was appropriate for her daughter to watch.

Her daughter reached the bottom step and crossed her arms. “Don’t call my Jihyo stupid!”

With a sigh, Wendy let her daughter hold onto her as she carried her piggyback style, walking throughout the house. “Okay, we’ll play the game.”

Joohyun let out a squeal of excitement. “Ok… beautiful?”

“Me, of course!” The mother’s voice was sarcastic, clearly less than willing to play the game.

A soft smack was delivered to the back of Wendy’s head. “Take this seriously!”

The mother rolled her eyes yet agreed obediently.

“Clouds?”

As they walked, they had passed through the kitchen where Wendy prepared herself a glass of water—a glass she was now drinking from as her daughter grew more and more impatient.

“Mom! You can’t take so long!”

“I’m drinking water!” After a moment’s silence, she understood that her stalling was pointless. “Okay…” she sighed. “We’ll start now.”

“Clouds?”

“Air.”

“Crazy?”

“You.”

“Home?”

“Us.”

“Love.”

“Friendship.”

“Joohyun?”

“Bae Joo…hyun.” The response came automatically, only faltering when Wendy realized whose name she had uttered.

She placed her daughter down, who looked at her with inquisition.

Please don’t ask any questions, Wendy silently repeated in her head.

“Bae? Who is Bae Joohyun?” Her faux wonder caught the attention of Yeri, who joined in on the opportunity to make her sister squirm.

“Yeah, Wendy, who's that?” Yeri pretended as if she was not the one who answered the phone every time her sister called to “complain” about a certain student, or as Yeri liked to call it, gushing and refusing to shut up.

The eldest of the three glared at Yeri, leaning against a nearby wall. Here come the questions.

“Nobody.” Her answer was short and unsatisfactory for all parties.

Bae Joohyun was the defining character of Wendy’s youth. She was the sore spot that she couldn’t talk about, even more than Sooyoung’s death now. It was the nature of Joohyun’s departure from her life that made the ache so profound, so hard to even think about and get over.

Over a decade had passed since she had last seen that face. She’d be lying if she said she could remember every little detail, but even if she could not remember the vividness of each moment the way she did when she lived them, Wendyremembered the way she felt.

A quiet afternoon rush as she woke up from a sleepover to see Joohyun’s sleeping face. A warm wave that seemed to pull her in as Joohyun’s loud laugh filled the room. A feeling of sunshine touching the skin everytime she was around her best friend.

“Mom! It’s my birthday!” her daughter whined.

She snapped out of her daydream, clearing as if it would dispel the thoughts of Joohyun, as if she was ever able to control them.

“Ok.” She decided to give in a little more. “Bae Joohyun went to college with me.”

Yeri egged her on. “Wow! In college?” 

Ignoring her, Wendy continued. “She was my friend.”

The younger girls were still not satisfied. “‘Friend’!” Yeri mocked.

Finally, Wendy grumbled out what they all knew. “She was my best friend.”

Yeri took a break from teasing, allowing Joohyun to take over.

“She has a nice name. What was she like?” Seemingly innocent questions from the child deepened the wound that never seemed to fully close.

A wistful sigh left her lips as Wendy became dazed, remembering the girl who was now no more than a dream.

“She was… bizarre. It sounds so cliche, but she genuinely wasn’t like most girls. Hell, she wasn’t l