Isn't it bizarre to be so close to someone yet feel such a distance? They had been back in New York for less than a week, and Yeri was already losing her mind. She wanted it to be as simple as blaming Irene for her cowardice, but she could not do so without looking in the mirror and placing some of the blame on her own shoulders.

When Winston Churchill spoke of the Cold War, he described it as being an Iron Curtain. The curtain that existed between Yeri and Wendy, however, was made of a flimsy fabric that Yeri couldn’t help but peek through. She missed Wendy; she missed being able to tell her about her love life and work and how she should take care of herself more.

An average night in the Son household had become marked by Seungwan undoubtedly stuck in her office, avoiding Yeri and drowning herself in work. Unable to take it any longer, the younger sister stood anxiously outside a closed door.

Two small knocks, one exasperated sigh from inside the room, and several small steps.

“Leave me alo—“

“I miss you,” she cried, not caring about Wendy’s grumpiness as she threw her arms around her. “You can make fun of me for this, but I miss you so much. I’ll never mess with your life again, unnie; I’m so sorry.”

Stunned, Wendy did what was natural and hugged back, feeling the relieved way her sister melted in her arms. Yeri was… interesting to get along with. But she was her sister, and after spending so much of their lives together, how could they bear to be apart?

“Come inside, dummy.” Seungwan guided her inside before closing the door. With a quick glance, she took in Yeri’s sad appearance, the teary eyes and small frame fondly reminding her of a younger Yeri. “I’m still mad at you, you know,” she said, a softer tone than before.

With a few humiliating sniffles, Yeri shook her head in shame. “I know, and I understand that.”

“I’m less mad at you and more mad at… the universe? But what you did was pretty ty, too. I’ve lost a lot of trust for you,” she admitted.

The words stung, but Yeri took them in stride. “I’ve always been, in your words, ‘a little ,’ but I really outdid myself this time, didn’t I?”

“Yes, you really did. Getting my father-in-law, my daughter, and your girlfriend—is she your girlfriend?—in on some large fantastical scheme to bring together two people because my dead wife, whom I love, told you to. It’s insane.”

Yeri cringed at the verbalization of her mistake. “Your ‘dead wife’ knew you better than you knew yourself. That woman was a genius.” A pensiveness joined the brown in her eyes. “Did I ever tell you about the moment I realized she really knew you?”

Brace-faced and wielding two pigtails, Yeri presented herself to a bewildered, and tall, woman. Getting to meet her sister’s girlfriend was a very exciting opportunity for the teenager.

The first thing Yeri noticed was Joy’s beauty. Long, dark hair, immaculate outfit choice, and a small smile on her face despite obvious fear of the teenager in front of her. The second thing she noticed? her sister standing nervously to the side.

“You didn’t say she was this pretty!” Yeri exclaimed before gesturing for them to follow her.

With a laugh, Joy was led into the dining room, where plates were already being set out by Mrs. Son.

“Mom… this is Sooyoung. Sooyoung, Mom. Well, my mom is not your mom. I guess you can call her Mom if you want, though.” A nervous laugh left her blubbering lips.

A larger hand found its way to Seungwan’s, squeezing three times and dispelling any worries. Yeri stood to the side, watching how Seungwan’s shoulders relaxed, and how her body molded into her girlfriend’s, how her mother lit up and embraced Sooyoung with open arms.

All Yeri knew about romance came in the form of beautiful monologues and longing stares on a silver screen, but this… this was real. Tangible, glowing warmth that surrounded reassuring tall girlfriends and their irrationally nervous lovers.

In that instant, any teasing remarks fell flat against a sisterly realization that this was love. Seungwan had found love in a woman who knew her perfectly, and that was enough to win the younger sister over.

“That’s really sweet, but don’t forget how stupid you could be,” Wendy pointed out.

It would be a lie to say Yeri wasn’t happy for her sister and her girlfriend, but there were still so many questions. In the backseat of a car, third-wheeling as always, she found herself unable to hold back.

“Why don’t you talk about Joohyun anymore?”

The pop song on the radio mocked the somber mood that had instantly filled the metal contraption. From where Yeri was sitting, she could only clearly see Joy’s side profile, sending nervous glances to the driver’s seat. In the rearview mirror, Yeri was able to see shifty pupils and a forlorn sadness that forced her to look away.

“She moved away,” came out her sister’s mouth in a curt reply.

“Phones exist,” Yeri retorted.

Looking closely in the mirror, Yeri saw the way thin eyebrows furrowed and braced herself for the storm. “I don’t have her number, okay? She left me, is that what you want to hear? I don’t talk about her because I don’t know her anymore, and neither do you, so don’t ask about her.”

Next to Wendy, Sooyoung sent an apologetic glance to Yeri before returning her attention to the stoic driver. “Wannie, she didn’t mean any harm…”

It seemed as if the words ignited an even worse tension in the car, but that had nothing to do with the girl in the backseat.

Yeri took no offense to her sister’s harsh words, for she saw the way those eyes reddened in the mirror’s reflection; she saw the desperate plea and misplaced anger at a woman who left too soon.

From that day forward, she made sure to never mention Bae Joohyun’s name again.

“I think that was less about my stupidity and more about your inability to deal with your feelings.”

“Fair point,” she conceded.

They continued talking well into the night, leaving behind any strange bitterness and rekindling the fire of the bond that could never truly be broken.

The next night, however, was not as kind to Wendy. It was a special day that brought up ghosts every year, but this year was especially cruel. 

“How ed up is it for me to be mad at a dead person?” Wendy wondered out loud, shouting to deaf stars in the sky. “Whatever, I don’t care anyway.”

Unfastening the top button on her shirt, Wendy sat alone on the stairs leading to the front of her job’s building. With a gusto that started in her gut, she bellowed out every emotion built up inside of her.

“Park Sooyoung, if you can hear me right now… you. you for dying, you for making me fall in love with you, and you for bringing that goddamned woman back in my life. I was doing fine, you know? Now, look at me. I’m sitting on the stairs of some stupid white-collar job, yelling at you on your birthday because I’m in love with a selfish, stupid woman. God, happy birthday, ! I hope this is what you wanted!”

Her chest rose and fell heavily. Soon, the breathing became shallower and wrought with crying. Her head in her hands, she stared heavily at the concrete beneath her.

“I wish I believed in ghosts. I wish I could see you again, I miss how you knew what to do in every situation. There’s so much I need to tell you. You should be here. You should be here,” she repeated in a hoarse whisper.

“What’s wrong? Your staring is making me self-conscious,” Joy joked.

Startled by the interruption, Wendy drew a lazy smile on her face. “I’ll always stare at you, beautiful.”

“Cute, but answer my question.”

Sooyoung’s gaze was unwavering, a playful challenge demanding an answer. Under such scrutiny, her wife found herself fidgeting and looking away before a deep sigh indicated that she had caved.

“Every time I stare at your bump, I get filled with this huge amount of love, but there’s also this fear that I’m not going to be a good mother,” she confessed, the shakiness in her voice revealing how nervous she was.

Sooyoung walked closer to her wife, gently placing those hands she loved on her stomach.

“Tell me… do you want to be a good mom?” She waited for Wendy to nod vigorously. Cute, she thought once she did. “Are you willing to put in the effort to do that?”

“Of course.”

“Then you’re going to be a good mom, dummy. We’ll both be learning, but I love you, and I love the fact that we’re going to have a family.”

Before she could stop herself, a few tears left her eyes, much to Sooyoung’s dismay.

“No, don’t look sad! I’m crying because I’m in love with you and our baby. I want to grow old with you and buy a mansion and have 2 kids so we can both have a turn with giving birth,” she rambled. “And I feel really stupid right now because you are incredibly pregnant right now, yet I’m the one being consoled.”

She chastised her apparent selfishness in the situation, but Sooyoung simply smiled adoringly.

“You have cooked every meal for me since we found out I was pregnant. Every time I don't like what I see in the mirror, you’re there to kiss my stomach and look at me with love in those cute eyes. I don’t even need to worry about whether or not I can take care of myself because you’re always there for me when I can’t. I want to console you, Wannie; let me be there for you the way you’re always here for me.”

If her goal was to stop her wife from crying, she failed miserably—more tears fell from Seungwan’s eyes and Joy rolled her eyes and pulled her close. However, she was unable to curb her own emotions as well, and soon enough they were both crying in each other’s arms, laughing at how in love they were and cherishing how they knew exactly what the other one needed.

Her car was nearby, stuck inside a parking garage. But she didn’t want to go because that meant facing reality, and reality was far crueler than her past with Joy. Sooyoung always knew her better than she knew herself, a result of always wearing her heart on her sleeve.

As she looked up at the stars, she dared to ask more questions, piecing together parts of her life that used to confuse her.

“Did you know I loved her? Did you know she loved me? I didn’t know. I know I loved you, though; that was all I knew and all I ever wanted to know.”

Seungwan could feel her fiancé’s eyes trained on her from across the kitchen; she felt like prey that was seconds away from being pounced on.

“Are we ever going to talk about her?”

There was the kill, a merciless execution that stopped Seungwan’s heart the moment the words left Sooyoung’s mouth. The knife in her hand slipped, narrowly missing her finger as she turned to look at Sooyoung.

“Who?”

The look in Joy’s eyes was enough to say: ‘don’t act stupid.’

With a sigh, she ran her fingers through her hair. “What is there to say?” Her voice was tired, a reminder that they had tried to have this conversation countless times in the past.

But no amount of failed trying would stop Sooyoung. She fired off her questions rapidly, each one increasing in volume. “Why won’t you talk about her? Why do you get upset when someone says her name? Why haven’t you tried to find her? Why did she leave? Why—“

“Okay, I get it—“

“Do you love her?” she yelled, surprising herself with heavy breaths and teary eyes.

“She was my best friend, of course I loved her,” she fired back, keeping her voice calm and steady.

“Son Seungwan, don’t you dare act stupid with me. I have been walking on eggshells because you don’t want this conversation, but I’m so tired of that. Tell me, are you in love with her?”

“What? Sooyoung, what the hell are you talking about?” Gone was calm and steady, replaced with yells that matched Sooyoung’s. She kept her eyes trained on the kitchen counter, afraid of what she’d see if she looked up.

“Don’t treat me like I’m crazy. What was I supposed to think?” 

Her voice cracked under the pressure, and Wendy’s head finally snapped back up. Noticing the tears in her eyes, Wendy abandoned her food and ran over to Sooyoung. Reaching up to wipe away any tears, she looked deep into those eyes.

“I am so in love with you. I got down on one knee for you. I chased you because I loved you. I ran through the rain and ended up on your doorstep just to tell you I love you. From the night I snuck into your room and kissed you, I never even entertained the thought of being in love with someone else. I’m not in love with her, because all I ever see is you. It’s you, Sooyoungie; I’m in love with you. I’m sorry I allowed for even a tiny doubt that there was room for anyone else in my heart.”

No words were needed as Sooyoung wrapped her arms around Wendy and pulled her closer. She mumbled a few sentences into her hair, but all Wendy heard was “I love you,” and that was all she ever needed.

“I loved you, and I love her. Maybe things would have been different if you were alive—you could’ve been the love of my life, and she could’ve just been a wom