“Where’s Joohyun?” Seulgi asked an equally clueless Yeri.

Breakfast without Joohyun was a rare, practically impossible, occurrence. Yet, when Seulgi looked out at the sea of faces and saw none that belonged to her friend, she realized the impossible truly had happened.

Not too far away, two women wove around trees as they walked together.

“You still look the same,” Wendy observed.

“Should I be offended that you thought I’d look different?”

“No. I meant you still look pretty.”

Joohyun blushed and mumbled a “thank you.” Ever since their basketball game a few days ago, Seungwan had become more confident around Joohyun, teasing and flirting like old times. Needless to say, it drove Joohyun mad. This peculiar woman had come back into her life just a week ago, and she was just as crazy as before. A part of her was scared to fall back into the feeling, but she was wise enough to know her fear wouldn’t change a damn thing.

Silence fell over them as they walked side by side, admiring the picturesque morning sky. When Joohyun was busy becoming acquainted with every tree and leaf and rock, Seungwan stole glances, resisting the urge to pinch herself.

It seemed too good to be true to be walking with Joohyun, to joke with her, to even be in her presence. Was she real or just a dream? Joohyun, with all her strangeness, was in front of her, and she wasn’t sure she knew what to do.

Things that were madness when exhibited by anyone else were just endearing. Her literal embrace of stopping to smell the roses, her extreme competitiveness—all of it. It was beautiful to know that although things had changed, Joohyun was still Joohyun, in all of her crazed glory.

Joohyun was familiar, but the things she felt, were they familiar too? There was an unmistakable itch in her hands, a pull in her body begging for her to get closer and closer. 

The fear she felt because of her own emotions had quieted down, her sister’s words of wisdom giving her the strength to embrace it all. It should’ve been new and terrifying, but Seungwan didn’t feel fear; it was like she had already walked down a similar path once, and she was just now finding it again.

It was a simple crush, she thought, and she was sure it would go away with time. The primal part of Seungwan didn’t want it to go away, didn’t want the itch in her hands to disappear; she wanted to touch her until her hands knew every part of Joohyun. 

But it was impossible to know how the other woman felt, if she would run away at the knowledge of Seungwan’s crush on her old friend. So she kept quiet, allowing herself to be satisfied with quiet walks and playful banter. Besides, she remembered how attracted she was to Joohyun when they had first met all those years ago, and she knew she would be fine if the attraction calmed down the way it did before.

This was a fresh start, and she was learning how to allow herself to go with the flow. Joohyun was electrifying, bringing her to life when she thought she had forgotten how, and that was more than enough for her. The past had met the present, beginning and continuing with Joohyun.

After passing through so many trees, Seungwan began to grow tired.

“Where are you taking me?”

“You’ll see,” she vaguely replied.

With time, they arrived at a gazebo sitting on the lake.

“The view is beautiful,” Joohyun said as she leaned against the railing. She looked at her companion, smiling at the way she too seemed to get lost in the lake’s beauty. 

A thought popped into Seungwan’s head, and before she could stop, she spoke it out loud. “Can we…” her logic caught up to her small fantasy, and she silenced herself. “Nevermind. I just remembered your fear of water.”

Joohyun looked curiously at the way the eagerness in Seungwan’s eyes had fizzled out. “What were you going to ask me?”

Seungwan shrugged it off. “Just if you wanted to go on the lake with me later this week, but I know you—“

“I want to go.”

“But you’re afraid of the water.”

Do you think I wouldn’t do anything you ask me to? “Yes. But I want… I want to go with you. My fear doesn’t matter.” I just want to spend time with you.

Seungwan smiled and grabbed Joohyun’s hand, giving it a squeeze.

“It’s a date, then. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.”

A date. A week ago, she dreamt of sinful things, of grabbing the forbidden fruit herself and consuming it whole. But she feared she had made a stupid decision by letting herself jump off the cliff without thinking of who may follow and jump after her.

Ignorance was bliss. She let herself hope that only one woman loved her, that only one woman looked at her with as much love as she showed Seungwan, for she could handle falling in love with Seungwan, but she wasn’t sure she would know what to do if Seungwan felt the same. Her heart belonged to Seungwan, but Seungwan’s couldn’t belong to her—not when she had Jennie.

“Joohyun, are you okay?”

Her fingers were curled tightly around the edges of the boat, desperate to feel something solid. Joohyun looked incredulously at the other woman in the boat. “Does it look like I’m okay?”

“Ok, grumpy. I’d say to hold my hand, but I’m a little occupied right now. Just focus on me. You’re okay. I’m here.”

Joohyun bit her lip, trying to ground herself with the sight of Seungwan. The business clothes had finally been shed; she wore a pair of khaki shorts with a Camp Happiness t-shirt, the official uniform of all the junior counselors. She looked breathtaking, her bare face glowing in the morning sun. A serenity was found in the way her strong shoulders pulled back again and again to row the boat.

It was another quiet morning; Seulgi and Yeri had gotten used to the absence of the two women at breakfast. Instead, there was a small cooler at their feet, holding an assortment of food that Seungwan had prepared. 

When they had made their way away from the shore, Seungwan set the oars down and reached down for the food. Her movements made the boat wobble, much to Joohyun’s dismay. Instantly, Seungwan reached out for her hand, hoping to calm her down. She didn’t let go, using her free hand to hand out a small breakfast sandwich with fruit.

Joohyun looked at the hand that grasped her own, smiling at the concern held in those pale hands. A small plate was shoved into her hand, and she reluctantly let go of Seungwan. The absence of a warm hand was replaced with the warm satisfaction of the best sandwich she had ever tasted.

“You’re the best chef I know,” she said with a full mouth.

“And you’re gross. Chew your food, cutie.” Seungwan froze at the slip of the pet name, but Joohyun didn’t seem to notice or mind, too focused on her food.

She took the final bite of her sandwich and began eating the fruit.

“This isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. The water’s actually pretty,” Joohyun observed.

She leaned over the edge, peering at the dark water.

“Joohyun, don’t lean too much, you’ll flip the—“

Her words were swallowed by the water. Instinctively, she went back to the surface, blinking the water out of her eyes to see a flailing Joohyun. An urgent drive took over as she rushed to save her.

She dove back under the water, knowing she wouldn’t be able to approach Joohyun’s panicking body from the front. Once she was behind the struggling woman, she pulled herself back to the surface, making sure Joohyun’s hip was in her hand. She tilted the drowning woman’s chin backwards with her other hand, pulling her flush against the front of her body.

“You’re okay,” she said several times, more for herself than Joohyun. She felt Joohyun relax and removed her hand from her chin, bringing it down to the other hip. As Joohyun coughed any water out, she held her steady.

“I’m sorry,” she croaked out. “All the food is gone. I didn’t know it would lean so easily. I’ll make it up to you.”

“ the food, Hyun. I’m just glad you’re okay.” She hugged her from behind, burying her face in her neck. Her lungs were burning from the expulsion of water, and Seungwan’s touch only made it worse. After forcing herself to calm down, Joohyun aligned her breathing with hers, letting her own body relax into the other’s.

She called me Hyun. Everyone called her that, but hearing it from Seungwan after so long, it felt like recognizing the sound of your name being called in a large crowd.

“It’s cold,” she said eventually.

Seungwan lifted her head from the shoulder she had been so comfortable in. “Sorry,” she mumbled lazily. “I think I was starting to fall asleep like this. Do you want to get back in the boat or do you want to swim back?”

She didn’t know why she offered to swim back; it would take an over exertion of strength, but selfishly, she didn’t want to let Joohyun go.

“I can’t swim,” she plainly answered. How could they both swim back?

“But I can. And we’re not too far from the shore”

Oh. The idea of being carried to shore by her literal savior stirred a warmth inside Joohyun. To turn that down would be idiocy. “Swim.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Seungwan kept her left hand wrapped around Joohyun’s hips as she leaned back and let Joohyun lay against her. With her right arm out, she began to backstroke, kicking her legs out as she forced herself to keep going. It was a silent trip back, minus the small grunts that would come from Seungwan, not that Joohyun minded.

Seungwan pulled the two of them on to the grass and laid on her back, enjoying the heat on her wet skin. Her body burned as she laid limp on the ground. Weakly, she turned her head to see Joohyun standing and stretching. The way the sun hit her body was divine, making Seungwan question whether or not she was in heaven.

Joohyun finished stretching and looked curiously at a wide-eyed Seungwan. “Are you okay?”

Seungwan looked away, not wanting to meet the stare of the other woman. She sat up and rolled her shoulders. “I’m so sore. I had just stopped feeling sore from basketball, and now my arms and legs are dead.”

“Where’d you learn to save someone from drowning?”

“I enrolled Joohyun in swimming classes when she was younger, and I ended up learning a lot too. When I was younger, I was so paranoid; I felt like I needed to prepare for every little thing. Losing Joohyun wasn’t an option for me, not after… after Sooyoung.”

The mention of Sooyoung’s name brought a sad smile to their faces. Joohyun sat beside her on the grass, offering support.

“Can I ask what happened to Sooyoung?”

Seungwan let out a shaky breath. “Postpartum hemorrhaging. It was so fast, they couldn’t save her.”

Her own eyes had become wet with emotion, regret and sadness building up inside her. She never even got a chance to say goodbye. Joohyun closed her eyes and rested her head on the mother’s shoulder.

“It’s okay. I just hope I’m being a good enough mother. I hope I’m living a life Sooyoung would be proud of.”

She lifted her head and looked right into Seungwan’s eyes. “From what I’ve seen, you’re a fantastic mother. What type of life do you think she’d want you to live?”

Seungwan returned an even heavier stare. “A life where I’m happy.”

“Are you?” She found herself anticipating the answer without realizing it.

Seungwan looked over at her still-soaked companion. Her heart always seemed to race around her, but still she felt at peace. It was almost second nature at this point to reach down and intertwine her fingers with Joohyun’s.

“I think I’m getting there.”

They stood on a bridge, watching the other cast their line. It was Joohyun’s idea to go fishing, and it was Seungwan's idea to refuse to go back on to the water.

So they compromised, standing side by side on a warm evening. 

“Look!” Joohyun showed off her large catch, sticking a tongue out at an unlucky Seungwan.

“No one likes a show-off,” she mumbled.

“It’s so big. This is the biggest fish I’ve ever seen. I caught this huge fish. Are you looking?”

Tired of Joohyun boasting, she went behind her and began tickling her sides, wrapping her arms tightly around her when she tried to escape. Seungwan loved the way her body responded to her touch, gasping and shivering and unable to stay still.

“Not so cocky now, hm?” she teased.

Joohyun shivered at the low voice against her ear. But she knew this game, and she wasn’t going to lose. She pushed back against Seungwan, resting all her weight on her.

“Are you upset because you at fishing and I’m amazing?”

Seungwan chuckled and squeezed tighter. “I’ll throw you off the bridge.”

She rolled her eyes and turned to look back at the woman holding her. “Would you really?”

“Only if I was jumping right after you.”

Joohyun’s stomach dropped. This wasn’t part of the plan; Seungwan wasn’t supposed to be so affectionate, so caring and sweet. The time she spent with Seungwan was supposed to be selfish, a one-sided affair with no external complications. But when Seungwan spoke words laced with honey and looked at her like she was the moon, it felt like she was still drowning in the lake. 

A summer shower began to drench the two women as they went on an evening stroll.

“I’m really starting to hate anything that has to do with water.”

She looked at Joohyun, who was clearly uncomfortable with the rain falling on her. Without a second thought, she removed her jacket and wrapped it around Joohyun, making sure to put the hood on her head.

The jacket smelled like her, a comforting warm hug. Too romantic. “Oh, you don’t have to—“

“You’ll get sick.”

“And you won’t?” she challenged, already beginning to take off the jacket.

Seungwan put a hand on her shoulder to stop the attempted removal of the jacket. “No, I won’t. So shut up and wear it. Now, let’s go.” 

She grabbed Irene’s hand and pulled her back to their cabin, breaking out into a run.

Seungwan, so selfless. Always there to save me. Who’s saving you?

Less than two days later, Joohyun guided a spoon full of soup into Seungwan’s mouth. She sat grumpily under the covers, a sweat breaking out on her forehead.

“What did you say about gettin