When Seulgi had woken up that morning, she noticed two things. The first was the empty spot beside her; she groaned with embarrassment as she remembered how her roommate hoarded all the blankets and cuddled her to make up for the lack of warmth. The second, however, was more concerning: rays of sunlight, which were far too bright for the time of day it should’ve been, had made their way past the thin curtain on the bedroom window and had reached Seulgi’s skin, angrily poking her until she noticed their presence.

With a start, she jumped up and checked the time. It was already noon. She had missed breakfast, and she was going to miss lunch if she didn’t hurry up.

So after a quick shower and a million curses towards the woman who seemed to only bring havoc to her life, Seulgi rushed out the door and to the dining hall.

In her rush, she carelessly entered the doors of the building, her eyes not focused on anything in particular. The mistake of her carelessness became evident as she almost immediately tripped over a bag that had been left in the middle of the walkway, right in front of the doors.

Her frustration with the backpack was forgotten in exchange for disbelief. Less than five feet away was the back of a tiny woman with disheveled hair and clothes.

There are moments where it feels as if one is watching their own life as an outsider. The body feels paralyzed, the mind feels inactive. In moments like those, all one seems to feel is their own useless heart, beating again and again to the point of delirium.

Seungwan, Seungwan, Seungwan.

Irene had walked around the table filled with food, making sure every step was marked with precision. Anything short of careful, cautious steps, and her legs surely would’ve given out underneath her.

The closer she got to Seungwan, the more assured she felt given the obvious mutual nervousness they were feeling. Her own hands had been balled into fists to hide the tremor, but she stared at the unabashed way her old best friend’s hands shook.

Just a few more steps.

They hadn’t even looked at each other’s faces, too afraid to see what was in each other’s eyes. But Joohyun got closer and closer, and it was harder and harder to just stare at her own feet.

She took another step. Her eyes traveled upwards, stopping where Wendy’s, now untucked, shirt met the waistband of her pants. 

Another step. It seemed as if Wendy’s body was vibrating, ready to run at any given moment. Moving upwards, she rested her gaze upon Wendy’s chest, her exposed collarbones revealing an unsteady breathing pattern and slightly flushed skin.

One final step. If one of them were to put a hand out, they could touch the other. It felt as if her eyes were being weighed down; gravity was screaming at her to save herself, to look away.

But when did Irene ever listen to anyone but herself? With a gulp and an audibly shaky exhale, she looked up one last time.

To her surprise, Son Seungwan was already staring right at her, a mix of wonder and sadness swirling in those round eyes. 

Wendy was mesmerized, like a moth to a flame. She just hoped she wouldn’t burn her wings. Irene was hauntingly beautiful now; years ago, her beauty was bright and loud, but now her beauty shone through darkness and years of regret.

Irene’s eyes stared into hers, guilt and disbelief peeking through an obvious facade of calmness. She’d be lying if she said she hadn’t fantasized about this moment. What would she say? What would she do? Numerous outcomes had played out night after night, but now that she was here, in front of the woman she ran from, all she wanted to say was I’m sorry.

Her big and bad facade crumbled quickly—her tightly curled fists loosened and she felt tears sting her eyes. She opened to speak, but words weren’t coming out, just a silent scream as she stared into warm, brown eyes.

“H-hi.” Wendy was the first to speak, nerves plaguing her voice. She cringed inwardly at the awkward sound, hoarse and shy.

It had been so long. So many nights where her lonely heart had cried out in solitude for her best friend. What was she supposed to do? Something was happening inside her, a chaotic cocktail of every emotion she felt towards Joohyun, and all she wanted to do was never let her leave her side again.

Irene felt ridiculous at how easily she was affected. Her cold and untouchable demeanor seemed to whir to life with just one word. If could work, there would be an abundance of words falling out, apologies and confessions, all of which started and ended with “I love you.”

My love, I’ve waited so impatiently for you. Now here you are, and I can’t even speak…

So she abandoned her voice, and she instead extended her rigid arms, hoping it looked like an invitation for a hug.

It didn’t.

Wendy stood still, confusedly looking at the way Irene’s arms extended straight out, forming an almost perfect V. She realized too late that it was a hug, reaching out to hold Irene just as her arms returned to her sides.

An awkward exchange of missed hugs and handshakes and high fives ensued, causing their audience to shake their heads and sigh.

After several utterances of “sorry” from both sides, Wendy simply grabbed Irene’s petite hand between her own, using both hands to hold it as if it was a precious jewel.

Both of them jolted at the touch, hot sparks traveling through both their fingertips.

So soft. 

It was only after she held Irene’s hand that she took in her full appearance. A bright yellow sundress and long, dark hair only emphasized the sadness in her eyes. What happened to the girl she used to know?

“You’re wearing a dress?” It was a stupid thing to say, but both women were too caught up in their own shock to realize.

Wendy stopped looking into her eyes, abandoning them for an exposed chest and a dress that stopped in the middle of Irene’s thigh. And if Irene wasn’t so caught up in the sound of Wendy’s voice, she would’ve noticed how her old friend’s eyes seemed to slow when they saw skin, how her breath hitched, how her cheeks reddened.

A shy smile sprouted on Irene’s face. She nodded timidly, still unable to form words. Her current style was a far cry from the baggy, neon style that she used to swear by.

What a beautiful smile.

Flustered, Seungwan ran a still shaky hand through her hair, a mindless habit. It was simple and mundane, something that Irene was sure she had seen a million times before. But the sight of a smooth, pale hand running through silky hair was enough to bring Irene into a trance.

So beautiful.

“Hey!” Yeri’s voice came out clear and sharp, startling the two women out of their moment.

Bashfully, they looked away from each other in a poor attempt to come back to earth. Wendy began to walk towards her sister, accidentally bumping into Irene; she moved to her left, and Irene moved to her right. Another bump. This time, Wendy moved to the right, only for Irene to mirror her movement. 

With certainty, Wendy gently grabbed Irene’s shoulders and spun her around, so they could walk together. Both were surprised at the boldness of the move, yet neither of them said another word to each other.

Wendy’s hands seemed to burn through her exposed skin, everywhere she touched seemed to flush and heat. If Wendy was the fire, then Joohyun was the kindling she would surely burn.

Behind the table that was filled with food at some point was Yeri, Seulgi, and Son Joohyun. When did Seulgi get here? Irene wondered. She didn’t even remember anything besides Seungwan.

The two of them stood at the other side of the table, stealing glances at one another and ignoring the three in front of them.

“Hello, Seungwan, it’s been a long time, hasn't it?”

Kang Seulgi. They were always civil with each other for Joohyun’s sake, but Wendy knew Seulgi wanted to strangle her most of the time. She wished she knew why.

“Hi, Seulgi. You look great!” She meant it, too. Her body was just as lean as it was thirteen years ago, and her hair was a rich, dark color.

She received a tight smile in response. I guess she still doesn’t like me. 

“Hey.” One word from her sister was enough to make her eye twitch. She looked at her with anger, and then confusion, and then back to anger. She was standing way too close to Seulgi, but that was something to yell at her for at another time.

“Son Yerim, I am going to kill you. Did you forget you live in my house? Or that you basically kidnapped my child? What the f—“

“Hi, Mom!”

Her shoulders relaxed, and her rant dissolved into nothingness. She was ok. Instantly, she went behind the table and pulled her child close, embracing her in a strong hug.

“Hi, baby. I missed you so much. I’m going to kill your aunt, ok?”

Irene watched with amazement. The amount of emotions Wendy cycled through in less than 5 minutes was cause for awe. felt tighter, and she couldn’t stop staring at the mother and daughter.

This was life now. Wendy had loved and lost and found happiness in a child. 

Am I too late? Did I miss too much already?

It felt as if Wendy had lived her life already, while Joohyun hadn’t even begun hers.

“Hey, you ok?”

Yeri watched Joohyun watch Seungwan. If those eyes could talk, they’d be begging for a second chance. Regret and realization seemed to cast a dark shadow upon the older woman’s form as she stared helplessly at her old best friend.

She stared blankly at Yeri. It was enough to be an answer. If only that could’ve been enough to answer everything Seungwan must have been dying to ask.

“Hey.”

Seungwan.

The confident strides she took to get behind the table were now replaced with a hesitant look and fidgeting hands. She was scared to look at Irene again, though it felt foolish to feel such a trivial thing towards someone she knew—or, once knew.

On separate sides of the same table, the distance felt like a shield, protecting Irene from the dreadful fate that came from being too close.

“Hey,” she spoke for the first time, causing Wendy’s eyes to widen.

Her voice came out weak and fragile, as if it would shatter at any moment. And perhaps it would, for she was dangerously close to falling off her cliff.

Now in between Seulgi and Yeri, Wendy felt guarded. She could not determine why she felt so nervous to see Irene, or why a simple “hey” was enough to accelerate her heart—years and years had passed, but was it naive to think they were the same? to think that there was no reason to be awkward?

A strong hand clapped down on her shoulder, making Wendy’s whole body jump with surprise, her already quickened heart slamming against her ribcage.

“Sorry if this is a bad time to tell you, but we’re out of rooms. You can stay with Joohyun, though,” Seulgi said with faux empathy in her voice. She was not sorry; the idea of meddling in people’s lives was lost on her, but even she knew that those two would need help.

“Don’t you think it would be weird for me to stay with a bunch of other children?”

“Oh, Seungwan, you’re mistaken.” Her face split into a wicked smile. “I didn’t mean your daughter.”

“Oh?” Seungwan furrowed her eyebrows as she stared hard at an amused Seulgi. Why is she smiling? Oh.

“She can’t stay with me!”

Joohyun’s eyes widened at the sound of her own voice. It was an immediate reaction, an act of defense against being forced to