Desmond shouldn't be nervous. He knows that, logically. He's done this dozens, if not hundreds of times before, and things always went well. Better than well, really. Objectively, even.

And yet today the idea of going to lunch with Estelle - with his girlfriend of over a year - is daunting. No, more than daunting, it's downright terrifying and it has no reason to be that way. He loves Estelle, he does, and her being a witch doesn't change that. It just means that she has a whole other job, and friends, and an entire massive section of her life he knows absolutely nothing about and retrospectively this is definitely why he's never met her parents and why Estelle's best friend Wendy gets so cagey sometimes when work comes up oh God she's probably a witch too-

A hand lands on his shoulder, the weight dragging him out of his head and making him realize that his throat feels weirdly dry. He blinks and follows the arm attached to the hand up to find Fergus gazing at him worriedly.

"Hey, you okay Des? You were starting to hyperventilate a little bit just now." The older man asks with a frown, his hand tightening slightly before dropping away entirely. "Work's not getting too overwhelming?"

Desmond pushes on a smile that he knows Fergus won't buy, but he also knows Fergus won't push. "Yeah, sorry. Got caught up in my own head is all. Definitely looking forward to lunch break."

Fergus grins at him. "Alright then, if you're sure. Hey, you live in that awkward suburbia Muggle area outside of London, right? What does the fireplace situation look like out there? We're seeing exactly how far we could logically push the Floo system-"

Desmond's smile relaxes into something more genuine as he and Fergus go over a few blueprints of the city and the area immediately beyond it, momentarily distracted and again reminded why Fergus is his favorite team member. Where Alex probably wouldn't have noticed his distress, and Kylee would have fretted in a well-intentioned but slightly overbearing manner, Fergus always lets people move at their own pace, and Desmond desperately needs that right now, considering how out of control his life currently is.

Then Fergus glances at the clock and pats his shoulder lightly. "Welp, lunch time. Go take a break, you need it." It's intended as friendly banter, but all the tension that had drained before comes flying back as Desmond glances at the clock and confirms the time.

If Fergus notices he doesn't comment, and Desmond bids his coworker (friend? He sees Fergus as a friend but he's not sure if he's rushing into that definition considering he doesn't have the best people-reading skills and Fergus seems like he's equally nice to everyone so Desmond probably isn't that special-) farewell and awkwardly shuffles over towards the Hunter's half of the offices.

Estelle is already waiting for him, looking relaxed and hopeful, and Desmond feels a pang of guilt that he's not able to be as casual about this as she is. This should be normal, comfortable, and yet he can't shrug off the unease that builds up every time he sees his girlfriend.

What else could she be hiding? What parts of the half of her life he'd never known about has she still not shared? Will she ever share it?

"Hey you. Don't get too lost in your head." Estelle prods him lightly. "Did you have anywhere specific you wanted to go today? I know this super cute diner in the Alley that Wendy and I sometimes take our lunch in, if you don't have any preference."

To anyone else the comments would sound casual, but Desmond knows Estelle, and she's nervous. Which only makes him even more anxious about this lunch - Estelle never gets nervous, which in retrospect somewhat implies she was never concerned about the endless lying she was always doing which itself suggests that-

"Des. Head." Estelle says, and this time it's a little more controlled, a little more what he's used to. Maybe he can just pretend things are the same as always, just for an hour. He can just enjoy some time with his girlfriend.

"Right, sorry. Um, that diner sounds good." He offers, and her smile has a touch of relief that makes him question if he'll really be able to pretend that things are fine. But he'll try. He's not sure he can make an hour if he doesn't at least try.

The lift down at least isn't too awkward, since they share the ride with a couple who presumably work on a higher floor, who are debating babysitting options. Desmond can't help offering his two-cents - he may teach high school but he learned about the British daycare system in university and he's always happy to help stressed parents however he can.

It almost does feel normal, if he ignores the other Ministry workers piling in on their ways to their own lunch breaks, chatting loudly about magical accidents and Muggle artifacts.

When they step off, the couple (Desmond really should have asked their names at some point) thank him, and Estelle pulls him along towards the double doors that lead out of the Ministry. He hadn't noticed when she'd taken his hand, which is actually rather comforting - it still feels natural to be connected to her, even in this small way.

"It's a bit of a walk, but it's definitely worth it." Estelle is rambling again, but this time it's not nervous chatter - she seems to have slipped into the sense of normalcy a lot more easily than he has - and Desmond listens intently as she explains how she and Wendy had located the small restaurant after work one day and had been frequent visitors ever since. It feels normal. If he ignores the stores selling Quidditch supplies and wands, it is normal.

Of course, Quidditch supplies and wands are normal now, aren't they? The old normal, the normal that encompasses "Estelle and Desmond" doesn't really exist anymore, vanished with the Incident and the Integration.

And maybe that's what he's most scared of - that they can't survive in this new normal.

But Estelle is still talking, pointing out her favorite spots in the Alley, sharing stories of her childhood that the Statute would have prevented her from telling before, and Desmond decides to be hopeful. At least for today.

"Actually my younger brother nearly set Ollivander's on fire when he got his wand." He offers as Estelle laughingly talks about how she'd accidentally given the wand shop owner's cat a bath when she was eleven and getting her wand. "So that sort of stuff is probably pretty common around there."

It takes a moment of silence before he realizes that Estelle has stopped walking, and is currently gaping at him slightly. "Um, everything okay?" He asks, glancing around the Alley to see if he missed a dark wizard or something that could cause his girlfriend to look that caught off guard."

"Winston is a wizard?" Estelle asks, and it hits Desmond then that in all his avoiding Estelle he'd never actually told her that he already knew about the magical world prior to the Incident.

"Um, Sheperd is too, actually. He's the one who pushed me to join the Initiative." He offers, blushing slightly and suddenly worried he's about to get dumped for lying.

Instead Estelle grins so brightly Desmond's cheeks hurt just from looking at it. "That's amazing! Oh man, and here I was fretting so much about how to tell you about all this." She laughs. "We really could have saved ourselves a lot of grief, couldn't we? What do your brothers do? I've never seen them around the Ministry, though I guess that doesn't really mean much considering my Auror division is usually stuck on clean up so the only group we really work with are the Obliviators."

Desmond caughs awkwardly. "I, um, don't really know what they do actually. We aren't that close remember."

Estelle's smile drops. "Oh, right. I was attributing that to you guys just being brothers and me not understanding sibling dynamics, but if both of them are wizards then you're the only non-magical one in the family, aren't you?"

Desmond shrugs uneasily. This really isn't something he wants to get into when he's already feeling off-balance (which begs the question of why he brought up Winston in the first place, but he's not exactly being logical right now. Stupid emotions messing up his processing powers). "My parents are Muggles too, so it's not like with Kylee or Alex." He says after a moment. That sounds properly detatched. "Anyway, how far is this diner? We're past Gringotts and I always thought that was the end of the Alley."

Estelle frowns at him pointedly, but for some reason doesn't push when she normally would. Though maybe this is the new normal. Desmond doesn't know what to think anymore.

Estelle can tell how tense Desmond is, and it's driving her a little bit crazy. She loves Desmond, but he's always been just a bit more emotional than she totally understands, and he keeps vanishing into his head as they walk, which is never a great sign. When Desmond gets too into his head he starts self-sabotaging, and she doesn't want him to nosedive this relationship just as she's finally able to actually talk about all the things she'd had to hide for the past year and a half that they've known each other.

But while any other day she'd just call him out on it, after weeks of avoidance she doesn't know if they're still at a point where she can do that without scaring Des off entirely. She remembers the early days of getting to know him, when only half of her dancing around topics came from the Statute and the other half from Desmond's own laundry list of insecurities. She'd thought they were past those, at least within their relationship, but the Incident seems to have unearthed all of them and slapped up a wall between the two of them that Estelle is all too acutely aware of.

The waitress in the diner recognizes Estelle as they walk in and beams curiously over at Desmond, obviously wanting to comment (she's definitely eavesdropped on Wendy and Estelle talking about Desmond before) but thankfully keeps shut, merely showing the two to Estelle favorite booth by a western-facing window.

Desmond blinks as he looks at the view, momentarily forgetting to be stressed out. "Is that London? Like, non-magical London?" He checks.

Estelle hums, smiling. "Yup. It's a big reason why I like this place so much. The founder was a Squib who's wife was a Muggle architect - they set this place up to reflect living with one foot in both worlds."

Desmond gazes out the window curiously. "Poetic." He observes. "But I bet you prefer it for the ingenuity of the magic and architecture than the meaning." He adds with a slightly teasing grin, and Estelle laughs and agrees unapologetically. Art is nice, but she's always found the skill behind it more impressive than the end results.

Things seem normal all through lunch, but despite that Estelle can tell that Desmond is still tense, his nerves never fully draining even as the conversation flows as comfortably as it ever has. It's driving her a bit batty, and when they part ways back in the office an hour later she collapses at her desk across from Noah Travers and immediately starts venting. After all, lunch was his idea.

He looks amused for the most part. "You have to give him time - didn't you tell me he's conflict-adverse? This is reading as a major conflict to the instinctual parts of his brain and he's doing his best to counteract them, but you've got to give him time."

Estelle sighs. "Curse you and your reasonableness." She grumbles, though it's lighthearted. They both know that Noah is her favorite precisely because he employs ruthless logic to most cases. "I know you're right, it's just frustrating. It feels like we've jumped backwards in the relationship."

"Losing progress is never fun." Noah agrees. "But it's part of the ebb and flow of life. Major changes affect couples - and one as big as this inevitably is going to cause changes. You need to actually talk to him about this stuff - and I mean hashing out your emotions, not just laying out flat facts."

Estelle grimaces. Feelings are messy and illogical on a good day, but she does know that they're important for relationships, and its not like she hasn't been doing any emotional management in the past year. She'd just hoped she'd only have to do each part once and then not have to really deal with it again.

Noah brushes a quill feather over her nose. "If you love him, and he loves you, then you'll figure it out. That's more important than anything else, right?"

Estelle rolls her eyes slightly. "You make it sound disgustingly sappy. And you really have no right too - you still haven't done about your girl."

"Diana is her own woman and I don't want to ruin our friendship shut up." Noah responds briskly, and Estelle can't help laughing at his reddened cheeks.

"Alright then Romeo, I'll lay off." She says, just loud enough that Tristan, who has the third desk in their cluster, overhears as he walks up, and he immediately perks up.

"Lay off of what?" He asks, and Noah glares as Estelle breaks down laughing again, letting herself be distracted as Tristan begins (unintentionally) nagging Noah about his love life. She'll worry about talking through emotions with Desmond later - right now she's just going to appreciate that despite everything she's still got some pretty awesome friends to keep her grounded.

Veena can admit when she's in over her head, and right now she is absolutely in over her head.

"What do you mean you can't take Nico next week Tuesday? You're the only people we know who aren't busy then." She says, knowing she sounds a bit frantic but not able to be any calmer.

On the other end of the phone her mother at least has the decency to sound apologetic. "We're so sorry dear, but it was the only time the bank had available, and you know our pension checks have been getting skimmed - we can't miss this chance."

Veena sighs, sagging slightly. She sees Cat look over at her from the other end of the room and tries to school her expression into something more optimistic. "I know, you get that straightened out. We'll figure something out. Thanks for telling us ahead of time."

"Of course dear. Maybe someone at work knows someone that you could hire just for the day?" Her mother suggests, and Veena purses her lips. She hadn't thought of that, but as none of her coworkers have children (that she knows of) she doubts they have any ideas about babysitters. Still, it's not like asking would hurt anything.

"I can check if Auror Seo has any recommendations - her boys are all Hogwarts age now - I can't remember all of them, but the youngest is only twelve so some of her sitters may still be around." Cat offers after the phone has been returned to it's charge port and Veena has filled her in on the situation. "It's unfortunate though, how the entire world seems to be happening next Tuesday."

Veena smiles tiredly and takes Nico from her wife. "Indeed. Worst case I can ask to move my day off to next Tuesday - Fergus would probably trade with me, he's possibly too nice for his own good, or Miles might as well. He honestly doesn't need days off, I think they might make him less mentally healthy rather than more." She jokes, and Cat smiles as she collects Nico's toys and spare diapers into his care bag.

"He certainly is a ball of extroverted energy." She agrees. "He's made friends with Estelle, Noah, and Tristan recently, and Finn and Fiona have both had to shoo him off so they can get work done."

Veena sighs, a smile pulling at her lips despite herself. "That's a good descriptor for him. I'll see about keeping his leash a little tighter from here on out though, I didn't realize he was interfering with work when he was over there."

Cat shrugs. "Well, admittedly it's mostly paperwork. We've been at a standstill pretty much from day one - Yurina isn't just in the wind, it sort of feels like she is the wind. You know she's out there, but you're never sure where or when she's coming."

"Muggles can predict where and when the wind comes from." Veena can't help pointing out, grabbing Nico's hand as he claws at her hair curiously.

Cat chuckles. "Alright, maybe not the best analogy then." She acknowledges, "Since the Muggles can't find her either - and they are trying. Every international Hunter Initiative that Pup is in contact with have Muggle law enforcement officers consulting with them, and there's nothing there either."

Veena hands Nico back once Cat has his bag slung over her shoulder. "Well, if she's alive then she's findable, isn't that what Fiona always says?"

"And Demelza. Though she definitely got it from Auror McKay." Cat confirms with a smile. "Alright, I'll get this little guy over to your brother's place. Say bye to mommy Nico."

"Bah." The toddler babbles, and Veena coos at him a moment before reluctantly pulling herself away. She has to get to work, much as she'd prefer to sort out the babysitting situation first.

She arrives at work just after nine, alongside a majority of her coworkers. Fergus comments on her looking stressed because of course Fergus notices, but she waves him off, promising she'll talk to him if she can't work things out. He tilts his head and doesn't say anything else, but it's honestly a slight relief to know he'll be on standby if nothing else works. He really is too nice for his own good sometimes.

Miles is out for asking about babysitters, considering he grew up in America, even if he's comfortably English now, and she already knows Petra is an only child so that's her out as well. And since this morning is going to be spent working exclusively with them creating posts for the Initiative's social media pages and responding to popular comments, Veena will need to talk to other Initiative members before work really gets going this morning.

She spots Aruna first, and figures if anyone else here has kids it would be the thirty-something year old lawyer, so she hurries over before Aruna has a chance to vanish into her office for the day.

"Hey, sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if you knew any babysitters or babysitting services? We don't have anyone to watch Nico next week Tuesday and-"

Aruna cuts her off before Veena can even finish her explanation. "No, I don't have children so I don't know." Her voice is sharp, and Veena backs down. She hasn't really worked with Aruna much int he past month and a half, and she's seeing now why that probably is.

She scans the rest of the office and her eyes land on Landon and Rose. While Landon is out for the same reason that Miles is, Rose might have siblings.

When she presents her conundrum though, both Rose and Landon look apologetic.

"I only have an older brother." Rose reports. "And I doubt any of my old sitters are still in the biz. I could ask my best friend Zoe if you like? She loves kids! I'm not sure what her schedule looks like though, she works with the Wizengamot secretaries so her schedule is all over the place depending on case loads and stuff."

Veena smiles at her. "Thanks for the offer, but I wouldn't want to cause that much trouble. I'll keep asking around - worst case I'll take the day off myself."

The two political consultants wish her luck, and then immediately dive into what sounds like an ongoing disagreement that Veena opts to leave them too.

The next person she sees is Desmond, and she lights up slightly. He's a teacher - surely he knows something about childcare services?

Sure enough, he breaks into a massive grin at her question. "Oh I definitely know some daycares you could use! Here, let me grab some paper, I can write down names for you. You know it's the funniest thing, I was just talking about this with someone so I actually looked this stuff up just a couple days ago-"

Veena is feeling a lot better about the situation when she heads over to where Miles and Petra are already scrolling through Instagram (or more accurately Petra is scrolling through it and Miles is hanging over her shoulder offering non-stop commentary since he's been banned from touching the laptop after somehow getting a virus on it within five minutes of being handed the mouse a few weeks back).

"Hey guys, what are we looking at today?" She asks, pulling up a chair and returning Petra's relieved smile with a relaxed one of her own.

The morning practically flies by - between monitoring Petra's stress levels and reining in Miles' enthusiasm time moves quickly, and soon enough it's lunch. Veena sees her two teammates off - if she doesn't make sure they leave separately Miles will shadow Petra all through lunch and she'll come back to work particularly snippy - and then immediately hurries over to the Hunter's half of the offices to find her wife.

"She's in a meeting with Demelza and the bosses." One of the other hunters informs her. It takes a moment to place him as Jack Abbott, one of the two Hit-Wizards on the team. "They should be done in a few minutes."

She nods her thanks and Jack heads towards the lifts, presumably going to his own lunch. Veena settles herself at Cat's desk to wait, scanning the offices idly as she does. They've quieted down drastically even in just the past five minutes as everyone has evacuated for their lunch break, and it's actually rather peaceful. She can see Mrs. Weasley still in the office - she always takes her lunch later than the rest of the Initiative - and Minerva Seo is pouring over some files, flicking back and forth between two piles, but otherwise the floor is empty.

The door to the Hunter's head office swings open and breaks the quiet as four more voices are released into the room, loud and boisterous.

"This all looks great, thanks for doing this." Fiona is saying with a bright smile. Beside her, Finn nods with a bit more restraint, though he also looks pleased (as pleased as he can look anyway - Finn has the sort of face that always looks professional, even when smiling).

Demelza grins back. "It was no problem, right Cat?"

"Always a pleasure working with you." Cat confirms, though her eyes have immediately focused on Veena so the confirmation ends up seeming a bit distracted.

Demelza follows her sightline as the two leaders vanish back into their office, presumably to go over whatever Demelza and Cat had given them, and laughs. "Go on, we're on lunch anyway. It was good working with you too." She adds as she heads towards the lifts herself.

Cat gives a half wave then hurries over to Veena. "Hey, I didn't get to ask anyone anything today - I was put on a special project with Demelza as soon as I arrived."

Veena smiles at her. "No worries, I got Desmond this morning and he had a list of daycares we can look at. Most of them are Muggle so we can find them using the computer."

Cat smiles. "Well that's convenient. I thought Desmond taught older students?"

"High school." Veena confirms. "But he sounded confident so I'm trusting him on this one."

"Fair enough. Start from the top?"

They use the work computer to research the daycare centers, and what started as a hopeful endeavor quickly becomes a new nightmare.

"Half of these don't allow one-day drop offs, and if they do it's pretty expensive." Cat muses as she scans over the list of names, now with addresses and pricing attached to each. "And a lot of them are pretty out of the way for us, especially without Floo access. How is that looking, by the way?"

"Fergus is working on it, and that's about all I know. He and Lindberg are keeping their progress and methods close to the chest until the kinks are worked out." Veena sighs. "We could Apparate, but-"

"Not with Nico." Cat says immediately, frowning. "Apparation is dangerous for someone who's nearly finished growing, nonetheless an infant. We'll take public transit if we have to - your sister can probably give us the best bus routes to use."

Veena holds her hands up. "I know, I know. We could Apparate back here afterwards, assuming the centers would be alright with the kids seeing magic that close."

Cat blinks, and frows. "Speaking of, Nico's right at the age where he could start having magical accidents. I don't mind your parents watching him since they handled you, but a bunch of day care workers having to deal with a flying baby..." She trails off, but now Veena is picturing it too and she's feeling a lot less optimistic about the list. They may be working to integrate the worlds now, but the fact is Muggle businesses aren't built to deal with witches and wizards actively using their magic. Not yet.

"If it's not an imposition." A voice suddenly says, and Veena jumps, having not noticed that another person had walked over to the desk. "My oldest son is eighteen and sits at home all day doing some Muggle thing - he has plenty of time to babysit if you need a magical sitter."

Minerva Seo somehow manages to make even an offer of help sound intimidating, and Veena needs a moment to process the offer hidden in the tone.

Cat luckily has a bit more experience with the senior Hit-Wizard and replies immediately. "Are you sure? Nico's only a year, so he can be pretty difficult at times."

Seo smirks. "Sebastian is responsible about children, even if not about his future security. Your son would be fine with him for a day, though he might end up in one of those ridiculous videos, so perhaps be warned of that."

Veena frowns. It would be better if they could meet him first, but she knows through Cat that Seo isn't the sort to say things if they aren't absolutely correct, so her son is probably as good a plan as they'll be able to get so last minute.

"Though I don't understand why you're not just using the Weasley sitter organization - Percy is good about offering that to parents working under him and I can't imagine his wife would be any different." Seo adds, and Veena once again finds herself slightly caught off guard. Asking her boss about this had never even crossed her mind - Mrs. Weasley honestly doesn't strike her as a family type. She has heard about how massive the Weasley family is thought - it would make sense for them to have a clear-cut babysitting network set up.

"That's a really good idea - we'll ask. Thanks Auror Seo." Cat luckily isn't as caught up in her own thoughts and remembers to be polite as Seo turns and heads back over to her desk with a brisk nod to show she'd heard Cat's thanks. "Is Undersecretary Weasley still here?"

"Yeah, she takes a later lunch than the rest of us." Veena confirms, blinking rapidly a few times to recenter herself. She's not normally this flustered - the babysitting situation really has her off-kilter. Hopefully Mrs. Weasley can provide a long-term safety net in case this happens again. That would alleviate a lot of Veena's worries.

The two women close the multitude of tabs they'd opened on Petra's computer and walk over to the Initiative's head office. Veena knocks twice and waits for Mrs. Weasley to call them in, which takes a moment longer that she'd been expecting.

When they push open the door the room is an organized mess, with several piles of paper and folder stacked up around the Undersecretary's desk.

Veena hesitates. "We aren't interrupting?" She asks uncertainly - she didn't think the Initiative had accomplished enough yet to warrant this kind of paperwork.

Mrs. Weasley waves them in. "Not at all, this is work for Hermione. I do have another job on top of this one." She explains. "But I'm done with this for now - what can I do for you?"

"Auror Seo mentioned something about a Weasley babysitting network, and we don't have anyone to watch Nico next Tuesday." Veena says, getting straight to the point. She doesn't know her boss that well, but efficiency is something she thinks Mrs. Weasley would appreciate.

The woman surprises her by adopting a self-deprecating smile. "Oh gosh, I never offered, did I? Percy is a lot better about remembering things like that. Well we can certainly bring Nico into the network if you like, though I should give you a few warnings about my in-laws, especially Mai's godfather George. He means well but I wouldn't blame you for wanting Nico off rotation when he's on duty."

"George Weasley is the one with the joke shop right?" Cat checks. "I think he has a daughter who's about Nico's age."

Mrs. Weasley smile warms up considerably at the comment. "Roxie." She confirms. "And Freddie is just past three. The Lovegood twins are around that age as well, so Nico will certainly be among friends."

"That sounds wonderful - he mostly stays with his grandparents right now." Veena says, quickly warming up to the idea (though she does want to hear those warnings about George Weasley and the joke shop - she doesn't want to pick up Nico and find his hair turned blue or anything like that). "So having some friends his own age to play with would be good for him."

Mrs. Weasley smiles. "Well then, I'll check what things look like for next Tuesday, and can get you a written schedule for the next few weeks if you like - my husband would have that memorized but I'm afraid I don't at the moment. I can get it from him over lunch though, if that works for you?"

"Absolutely. Thank you so much Undersecretary Weasley." Cat confirms, her smile matching the one Veena is pretty sure she's sporting.

"Not a problem Mrs. Wolff, I just apologize you had to come ask me about this." Mrs. Weasley says lightly. "Now then, I believe lunch is over - I hope you two ate?"

She looks amused as Veena and Cat exchange a look. "I'll arrange for you two to have a late lunch - Auror McKay won't mind I'm certain."

Veena and Cat end up heading to a late lunch just as everyone else is returning from their own noon-time break, and though Veena does feel a bit guilty for leaving Miles and Petra unsupervised she's more relieved than anything else. Not only did they find Nico a sitter for Tuesday, they may well have found him some friends as well. All in all, it's been a successful morning that's proven once again how wonderfully helpful her new team is, and she'll focus on that for now and deal with her coworkers when she gets back.

Aruna is arguably doing fine. She has her weekend meetings with Willow, had two meetings a week with rotating Hunters, and she's doing fine. She's moving forward, knows her schedule, and Fiona always tells her who she's working with so that's not so bad.

But she still feels on edge most of the time as she goes through magical law books and memorizes case studies. She tells herself it's just because this reminds her of law school, and muscle memory is stressing her out in preparation for exams that aren't coming.

She pretends she believes herself, and for the most part it works. She comes in to work, does her job, and goes home. Like a normal, functioning person.

She hasn't been going to see her therapist as much recently. With work she just doesn't have the time. But that's fine, she reasons, because having a steady job shows that she's recovered now and-

A knock on the door startles her out of her reverie, and she blinks and glances at the clock, realizing she's been starting unseeingly at the same page for nearly fourty minutes. Okay, not great, but lunch is soon. She's just hungry.

Another knock reminds her why she came back to the present, and she looks up nervously. Today is Thursday, so today she doesn't have any meetings, which means this is unscheduled. She doesn't like unscheduled, but she can handle it.

"Yes?" She calls, clears , and tries again. The second time her voice actually makes it out of .

The door cracks open hesitantly, and something inside Aruna twists and cowers when piercing blue eyes set into a face that could be a greek marble carving peer through.

Jack Abbott stays in the doorway even as he pushes the door open fully. Aruna can admit he's handsome, has thought so since the first time he'd come in for a weekly meeting. But she doesn't fully know what to do with that information - is Jack interested in her? She doesn't do as much with her makeup these days, and her daily runs from before have petered out into biweekly jogs at best these days - she's definitely put on weight. But normal people flirt with guys they think are cute, right?

Not that she really flirted prior to meeting her ex-fiancé (and the thought makes her stomach flip uncomfortably again) so maybe she shouldn't flirt?

"Hey, sorry if I'm bothering you, but I actually don't have much on my plate today," Jack says, once again pulling her back to the present, "And I was wondering if you needed any help?"

So he's coming to see her with what seems like a legitimate reason, but is it? She's been told before that men come up with excuses to talk to women they like. Is Jack doing that now?

"Um, I suppose that's alright." She hears herself saying, feeling almost disconnected as she does. It's the polite thing to do - he's offering to help, and maybe he likes her, and she thinks he's handsome so she likes him too, right? That's how the normal world works.

He smiles and steps into the office, gesturing to the door. "Open or closed?" He asks, and she gestures for it to be shut out of habit - she prefers it closed since the silencing charms Mrs. Weasley had put up only work when the room is fully shut off from the outside. Only when he closes it and sits across from her (in Willow's seat, but it's just the guest seat really, she shouldn't be so bothered when non-Willow people sit there) does she realize she's now alone in a room that's completely sound-proof and closed off from the rest of the office with a very attractive man.

Is this flirting? Did she just flirt?

Did she mean too?

Jack relaxes into the chair and gestures at the desk. "Anything in particular I should focus on? I imagine you have a plan for what you're going through today, and I wouldn't want to mess that up." He doesn't seem to have processed the significance of the closed door, so maybe there is no significance. Maybe Aruna is just overreacting where a normal person wouldn't, but that can't be it. She's normal now, she's functioning just fine. She has a job, and-

"Yeah, I do have an order." She says, maybe a beat too late, when she actually processes his question. "Um, today I'm working through magical legislative changes in the thirties, so you could go through... that pile, I think that one involves Muggle policing policies during the depression. You can compare them to what wizards were doing?" She points a bit uncertainly, her brain still stuttering over the definition of flirting, making it difficult to recall exactly how she'd organized things that morning.

Jack smiles easily and reaches for the pile. "Sounds good. I'll take notes and we can compare later, so I don't distract you."

It's thoughtful in a way that feels almost foreign to Aruna. Her ex (and she's not going to throw up just thinking about him, that's not normal) always pushed her to extend her boundaries, to try new things and go beyond her comfort zone. Heck, she never would have started dating him if he hadn't been so persistent to begin with, refusing to leave her alone on her run despite her trying to politely turn him away several times. Aruna is too stuck in her ways sometimes, and he never let her languish in old habits, always encouraging her to grow. So it's... strange, how Jack seems to be going out of his way to not push her.

Maybe her abnormality is more obvious than she'd thought.

"I mean, if there's anything particularly of note then you can mention it." She offers, again a beat too late, but he just smiles and nods.

"Makes sense. Thanks for letting me help."

She goes back to staring at the page in front of her without seeing, her mind a whirlwind of unlabelled emotions.

She should ask him out, right? He's being polite, and he's handsome, and he must like her if he made an excuse to come sit with her?

She should get some work done first. Maybe he thinks she gets lots done when she's in here, and that's what he finds attractive? So she should work now, so he doesn't change his mind.

She doesn't get much done. She finally finishes the paper she's been staring at for so long, but she only gets through two others before she spaces out again, acutely aware of Jack's presence and unable to find a rythm into which to sink. And after two hours, he stands up.

"Hey, are you alright? You're um, shaking, a little."

.

"Yeah, I might've eaten something bad at lunch." She blurts. "I'm fine, really-"

"I don't know, it looks like it could be a pretty bad case of food poisoning, if that's what it is." He's frowning, worried, and no she can't make him worry! Men don't want to worry about their girlfriends, it's the other way around. She's not broken, she's normal and normal women don't have breakdowns in their offices.

Somehow, she actually isn't sure how - she's losing time which is not great - she ends up on the lift going down, Mrs. Morgan's voice echoing on repeat in her ears.

"Take the rest of the day off, you look like death. Make sure to check how fresh your lunch ingredients are next time." It had been sympathetic, but firm, and now Aruna really does feel sick. Maybe it's a good thing she hasn't actually had lunch.

She takes the bus home, curled on a back seat that normally wouldn't be available, but she's traveling in the middle of the day so there's barely anyone riding. She pretends the pit in her stomach the thought produces comes from the lurching vehicle under her.

She arrives home and immediately collapses onto her couch, kicking off her shoes and curling onto her side. She's normal.

She's normal.

But normal people don't get sent home in the middle of the day. Only people who can't handle their jobs get sent home.

Not for the first time, Aruna questions if she's really ready to try and play normal, or if she's doomed to repeat today over and over again until they finally realize they shouldn't let her come back.

Author's Note: Man, Aruna POVs are not super cheery so far - that will change! Eventually. She's got a lot of healing still to do so... Regardless, we're back baby! I'll be seeing you all next week Sunday with a new (and longer!) chapter, and I want to give a preemptive thanks to everyone who's still here after that two-month nonsense. I'm still working away on that buffer, so it shouldn't happen again! If anything, my totally awesome TA assignment for this semester will probably mean I'll have more creative energy than normal ^^ Anyway, that's enough rambling from me - happy New Year everyone, it's good to be back!