Day 6, Year 21

She finally decides to go out of her room and eat. Soomin prepares her own food in the kitchen--a packet of ramen, spring onions, and egg to go with it. Her fingers tremble as she holds the knife, trying to cut the stalk of spring onion on the chopping board without cutting any of her fingers in the process.

But a few seconds later, while hearing the water boil in the pot she placed on the stove, she feels like giving up. She’s so weak that her whole body trembles at the slightest movement. Tears are already at the corners of her eyes ready to shed again, but she does not allow it. She breathes in deeply and is about to try chopping the spring onions again when she hears the door click. It surprises her, but she doesn’t have to look up to know who just came into her apartment. Only Jaehee knows her passcode anyway.

“Soomin. Are you home?” she hears Jaehee say from the foyer. 

But Soomin doesn’t answer. She’s too weak to do that, already parched from not drinking or eating anything for the past few days. Instead, she reminds herself of her task. She has to cut the spring onion and then put everything in the pot, mix it together until the noodles reach her desired consistency, and then she can finally eat.

Trying to put her thoughts in one place, she instinctively raises her hand holding the knife and attempts to wipe the wetness in her eyes that is blurring her vision--

“Soomin!” 

She hears Jaehee’s frantic voice, loud and clear. It startles her that she almost drops the knife in her hands, but before she can even properly know what the source of her best friend’s distress is, the knife has been taken away from her.

“Wha--”

“Oh my god, Soomin.” 

Soomin hears the loud clank the knife makes when it connects with the floor but she can’t go as far as seeing where it fell because she’s drowned into Jaehee’s hug as the latter let’s out a frustrated cry--something she must have held herself back from doing before she came to her apartment.

“Oh my god,” Jaehee repeats, a hint of relief and pain laced in her voice. Soomin does not understand where her best friend’s sudden change in behavior came from that she feels flustered by being attacked--well, smothered--by tight arms around her, cutting off the supply of oxygen to her lungs. “I don’t know what I’ll do if I have come a bit later. Oh my god, Soo. What shall I do with you?”

“W-what do you mean?” Even breathing becomes a hard task when she’s this weak and breathless. Jaehee’s closeness and hold around her aren’t helping at all but she can’t think to tell her off. Her thoughts are being clouded that thinking isn’t even possible.

When she realizes Jaehee isn’t letting her go any time soon, she tries to explain what has been going on in the kitchen. “I-I was just trying to c-coo--”

But then she heaves her last words, then becomes limp in Jaehee’s arms. 

Jaehee feels Soomin’s dead weight on her and realizes the lack of responsiveness from her friend. She tries to pull away from Soomin but then widens her eyes, gasping upon seeing Soomin already passed out in her arms. 

She cries for her unconscious friend. Panic suddenly settles in as she lets the both of them fall into a heap on the floor by the kitchen. Jaehee doesn’t know what to do at this point. She has never been in a situation like this before. So, the only thing she thinks of doing is calling her soulmate. 

Maybe Taehyung will know what to do.

Jaehee has been pacing back and forth inside Soomin’s hospital room since they came. She’s uneasy while seeing that her best friend hasn’t woken up until now. Soomin looks so pale and undernourished, so fragile that she’ll probably break if Jaehee hugs her another time. 

Taehyung sighs, feeling sorry that he can’t do more for his soulmate. He just wants her to feel a bit better, but coaxing Jaehee has been proven to be a hard task right now. No matter what he says hasn’t helped at all in comforting her nor in stopping her from pacing back and forth in the room.

“I’ve never seen her like this.” Jaehee shakes her head, teary-eyed. She heads to the side of Soomin’s bed and tucks a wisp of hair behind her best friend’s ear. “She looks so weak and broken that it’s killing me.”

Taehyung takes this opportunity to stand behind her and wrap his arms comfortingly around the smaller. This time, she gives in to his touch, leaning against his form. She must have grown tired of fighting. 

“I should have followed her when she just bolted like that that night and comforted her. I should have visited her sooner. I should have done that the moment I found out she’s not going to school or even when she was not responding to my texts…”

She is almost crying in his arms. Taehyung tried to coax her again, not wanting for his soulmate to blame herself for something she did not intentionally do or did not do. It was what was bound to happen. Maybe even why Soomin’s laying in this hospital bed has its purpose that will move her own fate. Taehyung isn’t sure about it but he just knows there must be something there.

He believes fate isn’t as cruel as it seems.

“Soomin will be fine. She’ll wake up soon.” Jaehee hugs him back. She hugs Taehyung so close to her that she somehow relaxes, some of the tension she has been feeling leaving her body at once.

They stayed that way for god knows how long and only parts upon hearing the loud noise the door makes as someone slams it open. They jump away from each other at the surprise. 

A frantic-looking Jimin invades the room.

“Soomin…” His eyes are worried, searching for his soulmate. 

When he spots her, he rushes to her side, almost hogging her upon seeing her unconscious on the hospital bed. “Soomin,” her name was an almost cry falling from his lips. “Soomin,” he chants her name as if it is some kind of spell, as if it’ll wake her up.

But she doesn’t.

Jaehee is immediately on her feet, prying Jimin off from her best friend. She’s back to her protective mode, showing Jimin a face of anger and confusion. She hasn’t told anyone but Taehyung of what happened to Soomin so she doesn’t know why Jimin suddenly barged inside the room and then hugs the hell out of her unconscious best friend as if he has the right to do that. Well, technically he does have a right to hold her. For Pete’s sake, he’s her soulmate. But on the other hand, after seeing her best friend’s reaction to him that night--how she ran away from there--and from what Taehyung presumed as to the cause of this reaction, Jaehee thinks Jimin has a lot of explaining to do before she can even let him any near Soomin.

“What are you doing here?” She demands from him, hostility lacing her voice.

Jimin tries to say something, but Taehyung beats him to it as he goes over between the two and explains, “I told him what happened and where Soomin is.”

“What?! Taehyung of all people you should know--”

“I know you’re trying to protect her. But I think Jimin has all the right to know what is happening to his soulmate, Jaehee. He’s worried too.” Taehyung interrupts.

Jaehee glares at Taehyung for trying to protect Jimin. She knows Taehyung has a point but it’s not Taehyung’s call either whether Jimin should be here or not. It should be Soomin who should decide whether she wants him to be in her life.

“I get your point but I think it’s not your call to decide whether Jimin should be here or not. Soomin should decide whether he should be here,” she grits out.

Taehyung’s done being patient. He doesn’t want to back out. Jaehee’s being an insufferable brat for wanting to separate two soulmates. “It’s not your decision either whether Jimin shouldn’t be here, yeah? You of all people can’t decide that.”

Taehyung’s words felt like acid to her. He throws facts but because he said it so condescendingly that she feels hurt. “Why are you siding with him? It’s not like he did anything to deserve seeing her.”

“I’m not siding with anybody. I’m just trying to do what’s right. You should know from books and lectures what the effect of being away for too long from your soulmate should be, right?” Again, Taehyung makes a point that weakens Jaehee’s resolve. “It weakens you both. It makes you feel this emptiness in your chest and you get sad about nothing. It negatively attacks you physically, mentally and emotionally until you become drained and that will only change depending on what you choose to do, Jae. You will either want to stick close to your soulmate to relieve yourself of the adverse effects of it and accept the bond or you ignore that premature bond you have with your soulmate until it expires. But even if it expires, you will forever feel that emptiness. You’ll carry it with you as a punishment even when you find someone else. It’ll always be with you. It’ll always be with either Soomin or Jimin if they don’t accept the bond. Do you understand how hard that will be for both of them?”

Jaehee comes into a silence that cuts through the room. She has gotten to understand what Taehyung was saying and understood that some of her reactions towards Jimin being present in the room were harsh and uncalled for. But the embarrassment of admitting to her faults and her pride gets the best of her as she looks away from Taehyung and bursts out of the room.

Taehyung sighs, feeling distressed about his soulmate. It hasn’t been a week since he found her but now they are already having fights. “I’m so stupid, aren’t I?” he utters more to himself.

“I’m sorry, Tae. I-I shouldn’t have been here but I just can’t not worry and not want to be with her,” Jimin says, looking sideways at his own soulmate sleeping soundly on the hospital bed. Soomin looks pale, undernourished and he just can’t help but blame himself again for causing her misery.

This is all his fault.

Taehyung places a hand on his friend’s shoulder and says, “I know you, Jimin. Your intentions are good and you don’t have to apologize to me or to Jaehee. But you have to make it up to Soomin. You both lost so much time but it’s never too late. So, do what you have to do to get her back.” He hugs his friend and then excuses himself to go after Jaehee.

“I’m going to go after Jaehee. Stay here. Maybe Soomin will wake up soon.” Jimin nods, watching Taehyung as he leaves and then disappears right after the door closes.

Jimin sighs in relief though the day has been eventful so far. Things haven’t been going his way since the night of the gathering when he found out that Soomin is actually his soulmate. Soomin, his ex-girlfriend. 

It has been three years since they last spoke to each other and saw each other. After the day of their break up, Soomin not once contacted him. Well, Jimin tried to talk to her at least but found out that Soomin blocked him anywhere. So, there was really no way for him to know what happened to her since then except when Taehyung would bring some rare piece of news about her--when she decided to move to Seoul, when Taehyung found out he was in the same university as Soomin, and when Taehyung told him about her coming to the gathering that night. 

He had not planned to really go that night, but knowing that she came, something inside of him gave him a sudden spurt of courage to see her for the last time before he meets his own soulmate and gets tied down to that person. 

What he didn’t expect that night was to actually end up being her soulmate; a dream that both made him happy and also undeserving. He was to say, stupefied by the sudden turn of events. Because what was the chance of him ending up being the soulmate of the person he once loved--no, the person he still loves? So, imagine the surprise and unease he felt that night. He only left her with scars and it had been three years since then. He wasn’t sure if she moved on from him in that span of time, but guessing from the way Soomin reacted after discovering that he was her soulmate, he still affected her. In a bad way. 

That really hurt him. The fact that she ran away from him again for the second time actually broke his heart. Because it felt like another rejection. Was it the extent of how much she hated him to be the one made for her? 

He couldn’t help but mockingly chuckle at his own faults. He ruined them before. Now, will she be willing to even give him another chance? And can he finally not ruin anything? Will she even want to keep him?

Jimin feels so insecure of himself because of her. There’s just that green monster in his head, feeding him with hopelessness and doubts. It wants him to believe that Soomin will not take him, does not and will not love him. She’ll want nothing to do with him. 

So he does not say anything to Soomin’s sleeping form. Instead, he pulls the chair next to her bed, sits down, and gingerly wraps his bigger hands around her smaller one. He feels the softness of her skin. Her warm , warm skin. It’s so warm that he can’t help but gently place feathery kisses on the back of her hand, her palm. 

They stay that way for a long time. 

Jimin can’t remember a time he had let go of her warm hand during those few hours.